Fear of the Dead (26 page)

She waved a Barbie doll at the window, revealing a toothless grin whilst shouting.

Hi
.

Vanessa couldn’t hear it, but her lips weren’t hard to read.

“
Where did they come from?” Vanessa mused aloud.

“
Don’t know,” Atton replied. “But they’re probably going where we’re going.”

And it suddenly came to Vanessa to finally ask.

“
Where are we going?”

“
Pier in San Francisco. That’s where everybody’s headed.”

“
Everybody?”

“
I saw two cars on my way over last night.”

Vanessa furrowed her brows.

“
Why? Why’s everybody going to the pier?”

Atton hit the on button on the radio, which was preset to channel 99.3. A third voice entered the car, this one interlaced with mild static. They cut right in the middle of what sounded oddly like a broadcast.

“
-time is 8:49 AM. Evacuation is in three more hours. If there’s anyone out there that can hear this, seek shelter in Fisherman’s Wharf. There is no need to grab supplies. There’s plenty of food and water on the island. And the people I’m talking to say that everybody needs to pack light. Bring a spare change of clothes and anything you might need, but nothing more. The ferry will be arriving at Pier 35. I repeat. Pier 35.

“
I will broadcast again in five minutes. For now this is Linus Baxter, signing out.”

Vanessa swallowed down.

“
Linus? He’s still alive?”

“
He made contact with some people on Alcatraz Island. As it turns out, there’s a whole colony of survivors up there. That’s where the first evacuees went after the attack.”

“
And that’s where we’re going? Alcatraz Island?”

“
That’s the plan.”

Vanessa didn’t know what to make of it. She didn’t know what to make of anything she saw or heard. Four months of not knowing if there was still an outside world to find. And now she finally did.

8:56 AM

I dream of one day becoming a mother. Not the suburban stay-at-home with a husband type, but the type that works, that can support a single child on her own. I often have imaginations of myself as being the cool mom. You know what I’m talking about. The one that’s more of a best friend than a figure head of authority, who’ll be there always to listen without judging. I want a son or daughter to do right by. To teach them all the things my parents never taught me.

Back in the days the more hours I spent cooped up inside my office, the less my dream seemed at all realistic. And if the demands of work weren’t enough, I knew I was never going to have a child with Tom.

It wouldn’t have been right. That’s not the kind of household that I want my first to grow up in. No. If I was ever going to start a family, I knew I’d have to leave Tom first.

But even loveless marriages can be hard to quit. If you’ve ever been in one, you’d probably know. It’s hard to tell your husband let alone yourself that all those years of love and matrimony meant nothing in the end.

Anyhow, in between the heartbreak and my career, I never thought that I would ever have the time or patience to be a mother. As much as I’ve always wanted it, it was always a few miles beyond my reach.

It’s been four months since my life has taken a dive for the worst. But now I think I’m ready to believe in a second chance. Because if not now, then when?

The answer is no. It’s never too late for optimism.

9:12 AM

When they arrived outside the KTLU building, the first thing Vanessa noted was the Costco truck standing in the middle of the road. The second, was the fact that they were slowing down.

“
Aren’t we going to the pier? Isn’t that where everyone’s going?”

“
We have to get Linus first,” Atton said. “We pick him up, then we head to the pier.”

Vanessa understood, and followed him inside the building.

Linus was on one of the many recording rooms on the second floor, speaking before a microphone with a large headset over his ears. Vanessa was glad to see him, and she didn’t hide it.

“
Linus.”

Linus dropped the headset.

“
Vanessa. Thank God you’re alight.”

Vanessa scrambled for a hug that Linus only half-heartedly accepted. He winced when his right arm began to stretch, and padded the sleeve of a KTLU jacket he was wearing above his shirt.

“
Are you okay?”

“
Yeah,” he recoiled. “I’m fine. Just a sprain. It’s no big deal.”

He shot Atton a brief glance, but said nothing. As the smile came wider apart on his lips he asked, “So where’s Grace?”

It was a while until Vanessa could finally bring herself to say it.

“
She didn’t make it.”

Linus looked utterly crestfallen.

“
I’m so sorry. God, I wish I could have done something.”

The air fell quiet then, with their conversation shifting into an inadvertent moment of silence. Before it could persist for too long, Linus turned to Atton and asked a question.

“
Do you know how many people are at the pier?”

The burly man shook his head.

“
We saw some drive by on our way over here. Other than that, I don’t know. We’ll have to see for ourselves when we get there. You ready?”

“
Yeah. I’ve already said all I needed to say. Hopefully enough people got the message. With any luck the ferry should look like Vegas by the time we get there.”

Linus wrinkled his nose before adding, “Hey Atton. There’s no need to tell anyone, right?”

Atton, who seemed to know what Linus was talking about, gave a stern reply.

“
They have to know.”

“
No. Look man. They don’t.”

“
Yes. They do.”

“
C’mon. Can’t you just do me this one favor?”

“
I can do you favors brother. Just not this.”

“
But I need this.”

“
I can’t give it to you. I’m sorry, but they have to know.”

“
They won’t let me on board if they do. That’s the first thing that guy on the radio said. They won’t it allow it.”

“
They’ll understand. Trust me.”

“
No. They won’t.”

“
What are you guys talking about?” butted Vanessa.

“
It’s nothing. Nothing to worry about.”

“
Linus was bit.”

“
What?”

Vanessa shuddered. Instinct set her eyes to observe Linus for any blemishes that might have come from scratches or bites. She could see nothing, but his jacket concealed any sign of injuries that he might have sustained on his right arm, which now she realized he’d tried to avoid moving.

“
I keep telling you, I am fine. The news has it all wrong. Bites don’t do shit.”

“
I told you about what happened to Eli.”

“
Whatever happened to Eli isn’t happening to me. You said he changed in a few hours. It’s been the same time and I don’t feel a thing. I am not going to turn.”

“
I hope so brother. I really do. But even if you’re right,it isn’t our choice not to tell them. The people on that island, the people trying to save our lives, they have the right to know. Especially if we’re going to be living with them.”

“
They’re not going to let me in if they find out. Don’t you get it? They’ll shoot me first, or leave me here to die. Is that what you want?”

Atton dropped his shotgun over on the radio terminal, and jutted an enraged finger at Linus.

“
Motherfucker if that’s what I wanted I would have shot you myself.”

Linus and Vanessa backed away at the sudden outburst. Atton immediately withdrew, his expression awash with apology.

“
The only way we’re going to make it off this city is if we stick together. Now I’m not going to let anything happen to you. You’ve got to believe that. Without you none of us would have even come this far. But you’ve got to believe me. Trust me. I know what I’m doing.”

Linus exhaled a long, resigned sigh.

“
I don’t have much of a choice do I?”

“
Just stick with me man. I got your back.”

“
Alright. Fine. I guess you’re right anyway. I probably wouldn’t be able to hide it even if I tried.”

It was hard to argue with what Atton was saying, but Vanessa nonetheless felt a pinch of doubt in whether it was the right thing to do.

Linus was bit. It was only a matter of time now until he’d start to change. Neither of them knew how it would happen or how soon, but they knew it would happen. It was unavoidable. Of all the things the media didn’t know about the infection, the way that people changed was the one thing they all were certain of. One bite, and people would eventually turn into one of them. If Linus was going to change, then taking him to an island filled with people was only going to put them all at risk.

She wanted to voice her concerns with Atton in private, somewhere away from Linus. But she was silenced both by what Linus would think of their secret conversation, and the fact that she didn’t have any better ideas. As simple as it would have been to just leave him behind, finding it in them to make that decision was an entirely different story. And for this reason she kept her reservations to herself, and encouraged herself with the words she shared with the two other survivors.

“
It’ll all be alright.”

9:18 AM

We’ll be leaving for Pier 35 in a few minutes. We’re still early, so there’s no rush to meet the ferry yet. I thought that while I’m here, I’d write just a little bit more before we go. Not much. I can’t keep the boys waiting. A minute or two shouldn’t hurt.

Linus is infected. He hasn’t turned yet. But it’s only a matter of time until he does. No telling when that’s going to happen. The only time I ever saw someone turn was when Tom got bit. Or was it before? Christ I can’t even remember anymore. It seems so long ago at this point, my memory’s starting to daze.

Tom changed under different circumstances. Who knows? Maybe Linus really will survive this thing. I hope to God he does.

But chances of that are slim. As much as I want to believe otherwise, I know he’s only prone to change. If not today, then tomorrow, or the day after that. And Atton and I have to be prepared when, or in case it happens.

I never said it out loud, but at the time a part of me wanted to leave Linus behind. Since then I’ve had some time to think things through, and I’m tired of leaving people behind. If it hadn’t been for me, Tom would still be alive. If I’d only done something to help Grace when she needed me instead of running, I know she’d be here with me right now.

9:19 AM

For all the things that had stopped working since after the start of the infection, the 70s style starburst clock in the bathroom was still ticking. She washed her face over the sink with bottled water and soap. The soap dispenser smelled of fresh lavender. Her pants were wet from the puddle she stepped in as they’d parked outside the KTLU building. Everything from below her knees to the insides of her shoes was cold and drenched. Vanessa wanted the chance to dry herself, but that probably wasn’t going to happen. Not now at least.

First things first. Head to the pier, find the ferry, and leave. Afterwards she could worry about comfort, and possibly hypothermia.

She pulled her hair back and tightened it with a headband she found from one of the abandoned offices. She noted as toured the building how funny it was that a rock station could feel so corporate on the inside. The halls were roomier, and the place didn’t have cubicles, but it nonetheless reminded her of the old accounting office she used to work in. It was funny, if not also a little sad.

As Vanessa was in the middle of rearranging her hair, she heard a powerful explosion ring in her ears. Immediately she flinched, and headed downstairs towards the sound. All along the way she peered outside the windows to see if it could have come from outside. Maybe the infected were here.

But as far as she could tell they weren’t. Instead, all she saw was Atton lying on the floor, bleeding out of his left side. Linus came in after him bearing Atton’s shotgun.

“
Linus! What are you doing?!”

“
I’m sorry. But I don’t have any other choice.”

Atton winced as he held the area above his open wound. He squirmed and made a clear but unsuccessful attempt at rising to his feet.

Linus cocked the gun and aimed the barrel at Atton’s forehead.

“
Stop! Linus. Don’t do it!”

He hesitated, and Vanessa could tell that he derived no joy from what he was about to do. Just like Tom, he was doing what he had to do to save his own life. And that meant killing the two people who could jeopardize his chances of being rescued once the ferry arrived.