Fearless (Broken Love Book 5) (5 page)

What
was
I going to do?

LAKE

SEVEN MONTHS AGO

I wanted this
motherfucker dead. I gripped the wooden handle until my hand ached and willed my feet forward. He watched me with a taunting leer as I approached his bedside. It wasn’t until I was near him that I raised the knife from under my shirt.

Quick and clean and it would be over.

His eyes lost the mocking glint at the sight of the knife.

I felt powerful and doomed all at once. Powerful for doing what needed to be done and doomed because the cost would be my soul.

Once I took his life, there would be no turning back, but it had to be done. I had a love to protect.

“Think about what you’ll be giving up.” He sneered.

“No, Mitch. I’m thinking about what I intend to keep.” I blinked hard to clear my vision of tears and lifted the knife to strike. I aimed for his heart and struck, but I didn’t hear his cry of pain or see his blood escape. My knife never even pierced his flesh.

Mitch didn’t die.

“Lake, what the fuck, girl?”

Shit. Shit. Shit!

I quickly recovered and snatched my arm out of Q’s grip and faced him. “What the hell are you doing here?”  This was bad. Real bad. He would tell Keiran I was here and what I almost did.

“I could ask you the same, so I will. What the hell did I just catch you doing? You’re a killer now?”

“I learned from the best.”

“You learned nothing, and the fact that you’re this stupid place tells me you don’t even have a clue.”

“Then tell me, Q. What am I not getting?” I had almost forgotten Mitch was in the room, but I could feel him watching us.

“Keiran is fucked up. I’m fucked up. Do you want to be fucked up, too?”

“It’s just one man, and Keiran isn’t fucked up. Not anymore.”

“If you really believed that then why are you here?”

“Because if I don’t kill him, I’ll lose Keiran forever.” I choked before I could complete the admission, but it didn’t matter because I felt the threat of it all the same.

Q’s eyes flashed with sympathy as he swept a stray hair behind my ear. If Keiran were here, he’d probably break his hand despite the innocence of the act. “This was stupid, girl. Keiran has killed, but he’s no professional. It would be hard for even him to pull this off and you’re about to kill a man in broad daylight with more than enough people in this facility to catch you.”

I felt the weight of his words on my shoulders and slumped against him. “What am I supposed to do? He can’t live.”

“I agree.”

I felt a chill run down my spine at the change in his tone and looked up. I had expected him to argue but in his eyes, I only saw murder. But then he blinked and the haze cleared. He pulled me across the room until I was standing in the far corner.

“But this isn’t your kill.”

My stomach turned at the thought of leaving Mitch alive. I couldn’t accept this. Q pulled his shirt over his head and wrapped it around his hand. His thin undershirt had lifted, uncovering his stomach when he stretched. I tried not to gawk at the brief glimpse of his physique, but Q was seriously cut into sharp, hard planes. I didn’t feel lust, but I did feel girlish admiration for his male form.

“I need to get rid of any prints.”

“If I may interject—” Mitch spoke for the first time since Q had shown up.

“You don’t have an opinion, bitch. You’re dead.” The room felt like I had climbed twenty-nine thousand feet up to the death zone. I couldn’t breathe, but the sound of my name brought me back to life again.

“Lake,” Q growled. He gripped me by my arms and shook me. “You need to get out of here. Now,” he added when I didn’t move.

“Me? What about you?”

“I’ll take care of everything.”

“What about Keiran?” It was a struggle to maintain eye contact, but I managed. His stare was invasive and cold.

“What about him?”

“Are you going to tell him a—about this?”

I could see the internal struggle as his eyes shifted. I was asking him to lie to his best friend. It wouldn’t be easy to convince him but he had to know Keiran finding out about this would be bad for everyone.

“I’m an accomplice to your lie now. The last thing I want to do is make an enemy out of him. He saved my life.”

God, I felt like such an asshole. I had tainted their friendship and created an invisible rift between them.

“You need to go. Don’t make me say it again.”

He nudged me to the door, but I couldn’t convince my feet to move. I took one last look at Mitch, who stared right back and winked.

“Okay,” I whispered.

* * *

PRESENT

I asked to
make a phone call, knowing I needed a lawyer and fast, but was answered with an angry glare. That had been twelve hours ago and still no phone call. Today was Sunday so I knew I wouldn’t be before a court until tomorrow, which meant another night in this place. I had already been interrogated twice. The second round had been a string of angry threats and accusations.

They knew I was there when Mitch was killed.

I was a murderer.

I’d spend the rest of my life in jail.

They’d even gone as far as to taunt me with the possibility of Keiran breaking up with me over the loss of his father. It took everything I had not to snort at that one. He would be angry that I lied and put myself at risk, but he wouldn’t mourn a single second over the loss of his father.

“Monroe.” Hearing my name called with hostility brought me back to a time when I was afraid of my own shadow. I reminded myself that girl was gone and met the officer’s stare. “Your lawyer is here. You’re free to go.”

“My lawyer? Are you sure?”

He didn’t bother to answer and placed the cuffs around my wrist through the space built into the bars before releasing me from my bacteria infested confines. For the hours I spent caged inside, I had more than enough time to conjure up all manner of grime that likely infiltrated my skin by now.

My heart rate accelerated with each step. The guard released me from my cuffs and I collected my clothes in a clear ziplock bag, changed, and was signed out in less than fifteen minutes. I remained stunned and silent through it all.

“Fourteen minutes and thirty-eight seconds. Good job, boys. You get to keep your jobs after all.” A large man with salt and pepper hair and an exceptionally white smile hurried to my side. When he extended a hand, the cuff of his jacket pushed back, revealing a large Rolex. This man was money, which meant he meant business. “Hello, Miss Monroe. I hope you are well.”

“How—who are you?” I looked around waiting for the punch line.

“Thompson of Thompson & Bain. I’ll be taking your case.”

“Who hired you?”

“Keiran Masters. I’m a friend of a friend of a friend.”

“Meaning?”

“I represent Richard Simon’s legal matters.”

My shoulders relaxed. Willow must have called her dad. “Where is everyone?”

“Outside. They thought it would be best to wait outside. Just in case things didn’t go as planned,” he added at my look of confusion. I knew what he wasn’t saying. We all knew it was better to keep Keiran as far away from police as possible.

Take a deep breath.

Release.

Before leaving the precinct, Thompson instructed me to appear in court by nine sharp and not to leave town. It was a condition of my unusual release.

“Ok. Let’s go.” I was eager to get this over with. I wasn’t going to run away from Keiran this time. I stuck my hand in my pockets to keep them from shaking and pushed the door open with my hip. I’d forgotten I hadn’t seen daylight for almost twenty-four hours and immediately, used one of my hands to shield my eyes from the sun.

“Damn, man. That was quick,” I heard Dash speak from my right. My eyes were still adjusting, but my body had already sensed Keiran. I felt him move closer. The heat of his body scorched me faster than the sun.

When my eyes were finally adjusted, I witnessed the emotionless set of his face. His eyes were the exact opposite. I was completely enthralled by the storm raging inside.

“Come with me,” he growled.

He didn’t give me a chance to speak as he took my arm, leading me to his car parked nearby. I attempted to gauge his mood, but he avoided meeting my gaze, so I was left wondering as he got in and drove off. My phone buzzed shortly after with a text from Willow.

I glanced at Keiran in the driver’s seat. The muscle in his jaw clenched, and his knuckles were nearly white as he gripped the steering wheel. The engine of the car raced as he pushed it faster than the speed limit allowed.

Don’t go home with him, Willow’s text said.

He won’t hurt me, I texted back and immediately silenced my phone. I knew who Keiran once was just as I know him now. He wouldn’t hurt me, and I wouldn’t let him if he tried.

We pulled into Keenan and Sheldon’s driveway and he cut the engine. We listened to the car settle in silence as the rain began to lightly fall.

“How was I released so early? Shouldn’t I have been brought before a judge before making bail?”

“There was never a warrant for your arrest.”

“Come again?”

“They never had probable cause that you were the one to murder Mitch so a warrant was never issued. You were taken under false pretenses. It was a set-up.”

“But how can that be? I—” I stopped when I realized the hole I was digging was just getting deeper with each word spoken.

Keiran’s eyes dilated until he was seething with anger. “You what? Are you about to tell me you killed my father?” When I stared ahead, he punched out at the steering wheel causing the horn to blare. My guilt was written in my silence. “Damn it, Lake!”

“Calm down.” I refused to cower no matter how intimidating he could be.

“Don’t fucking say that. Don’t tell me to calm down.”

“I’m not fighting with you in the car, Keiran.” I snatched his keys from the ignition and yanked open the door. Storming to the door, I left him to follow or sulk alone in the rain.

“Get back here!”

The rain was pounding down hard now, drowning out his roar. I ignored him and threw open the front door. I guessed everyone decided to leave Keiran and me to sort out our shit since we were completely alone.

“Lake.” I could hear his footsteps pounding the floor after me.

“I told you, Keiran. Calm down and we’ll talk.”

“We talk now.”

“I spent a night in jail for the first time. I need aspirin and a hot bath—and in that order.”

I took the first step when I left his hand on my upper arm. “Don’t walk away from me. Look at me.” His voice was rough with grit and desperation and I couldn’t bring myself to deny him. I met his eyes and saw the pain in them. He dropped his hand from my arm and wrapped his hands around my waist, tugging me closer. “What’s happening?”

“I don’t know.” But I wish I did.

“Did I do this to you?”

“What do you think you did?” My voice and heart were pleading because I didn’t understand the look in his eyes. He looked confused, heartbroken, and ready to bolt.

“Did my being with you turn you into this? I don’t even know you.”

“What is there to know, Keiran? Everyone always says how weak I am. How you’ll destroy me. How I can’t handle you. I just wanted to prove them wrong, and I wanted to protect you.”

“You killed my father, Lake.”

“I did it for you.”

“Yeah? What would make you think I would ever be okay with this?” he asked forcefully.

When I couldn’t find the answer, he turned and walked away from me, and I felt my world crumble right before my eyes.

KEIRAN

She wanted to
protect me? Why did it sound as if she couldn’t trust me? She lied to me and emasculated me with one blow, but worst of all, she put herself at risk. I let her go because maybe she was right. I needed to calm down before I did something I’d regret. I heard her ascend the stairs as I took a seat in the living room. I listened to the water run and cursed my mind when it ventured to thoughts of her naked. I even pictured her covered in suds, wet, and wanting.

My dick stretched the material of my jeans, and I suddenly felt hot all over. I had to sleep without her last night, and the reminder refueled my anger until I was on my feet, shedding my shirt dampened by the rain. The water had already shut off, and I pictured her waiting for me in the steaming water.

Up the stairs and across the landing, I shed jeans and shoes until I was naked and standing in front of the bathroom door. When I didn’t hear a sound, I pushed open the door and found her head back as she slept. She was completely encased in bubbles, her body hidden by the soapy water. I wanted in.

She must have sensed me because her eyes popped open. Recognition replaced fatigue and she sat up, watching me carefully.

“What are you doing?” Her eyes flew to my cock, and I could see her throat work as she swallowed. When her lips parted, she let out a little sound I wasn’t sure she had heard. The top of her breasts were visible now and when she moved, the water parted, granting me a glimpse of her pink nipples as they hardened.

“I want what I was denied last night, and you’re not going to deny me now.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

Thank fuck.
I wouldn’t have forced her if she had, but we didn’t need any more strain on our relationship than we had now. I wasn’t sure it would hold under the added pressure.

“Then move back.” It was a challenge, and she knew it judging the way her eyes blazed with defiance and lust. She scooted back until her back hit the wall of the tub, and I entered the space but didn’t sit. My dick was level with her lips and I wasn’t about to miss the opportunity to feel her soft lips wrapped around me.

“You know what to do.”

I smirked.

She glared.

Too much time passed, and my dick only got harder. When I grew bored with our silent battle, I gripped the back of her neck and brought her closer. “Don’t make me ask again.”

“I don’t recall you asking at all,” she snapped.

Fine. If she wanted to play this game, I’d play it better. “Suck me off, baby. Please?”

“Now you’re just being coy.”

“And you’re pissing me off.” It took everything not to shove my dick down her throat, but I wasn’t that guy anymore, and she didn’t deserve him.

“Maybe I don’t want you to be gentle with me.”

“No?”

“Gentle is not what I need right now,” she reassured.

“Open.” I could hear the roughness of my voice and feel her skin as my fingers gripped her tighter. When she opened her mouth just a fraction, I plunged inside, forcing past her teeth and feeling them graze my skin. The pain couldn’t stop me or make me care. She gagged when my entire length invaded her mouth, and I groaned from the pleasure of her submission. I wanted—no, I needed—to fuck that sweet, smart mouth of hers.

I pulled back and watched her draw in large gulps of air. Spittle dripped down her chin and tears streaked her reddened face.

“Brace.” It was her only warning before I plunged inside her mouth again. “Control your breathing,” I demanded. I wouldn’t take it easy on her—not after she had asked for this. I’d take her to the very edge until she felt as if she was falling and then I’d bring her back.

I fucked with her and she submitted.

This was the game we played.

Until I came down her throat at least.

I slapped my hands against the tile and fought to catch my breath. Only when I finished coming did I slip my cock from her mouth. She mewled and licked at my still hard cock.

“Fuck. You’re perfect.”

She didn’t respond when she let me go and sat back, letting her eyes fall closed again. I stood staring down at her for long moments. I could tell she sensed me because her body was held stiffly, a far cry from when I entered. When it became apparent I was being ignored, I left the bathroom, ignoring the need to assert my dominance.

Fucking wasn’t on the menu. Our little moment in the bathroom wasn’t supposed to happen. I was supposed to be pissed not lusting after her. I needed to stay focused to protect her.

My father was dead, but she could still go to prison. Her arrest was to scare her and pump information out of her. Thompson was working on learning what evidence they had against her to build a concrete defense.

Thirty minutes had passed when a door slammed, switching my focus to the stairs and the footsteps that were descending them. I felt my stomach tense and told myself not to fuck this up.

“Keiran?” She stood in front of me now, just between my legs. Her voice was soft, and the nervous flutter I hadn’t heard in a long time was back. I pulled her down onto my lap and wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her there. The way she stiffened rather than melted told me my intentions weren’t missed. “I’m not going to run.”

“We’ll see.” It was all I could say without starting an argument that would take us off course. “Tell me what happened.” I had to wait while she wrung her hands and chewed her lip. Her eyes were wide as she looked anywhere but at me. “If you’re thinking of lying—”

“I don’t think there’s much to say. You already know most of it. I killed Mitch because he needed to die.”

“Why do you think that fell on your shoulders?” I fought against myself to keep my voice even. What she did was stupid and she’d gotten caught. She had no idea what she was walking into.

She had no idea how to kill and remain detached.

Did I?

“I wanted to protect you.”

“I can take care of myself and
I
take care of us.”

“Had I told you where Mitch was, you wouldn’t have thought it out. You would have gone and killed him and gotten caught. You have too many strikes.”

“And did you think it out? Because you did get caught and murder is murder.” My voice was no longer level and rose with each word. She shook against me. “You could get twenty-five to life for that piece of shit!”

Her body stiffened more against me if it were even possible. “It’s done,” she stated coldly.

I used my arm to crush her against me, enjoying the harsh gasp that escaped her lips. A part of me relished the thought of hurting her even just a little. It’s how she affected me. She made me want to hurt her and protect her all at once.

“How did you find out where he was?”

“My grandmother is at the same rehabilitation center John kept Mitch.”

She flinched when I swore. “How did you find out?”

Her eyes shifted and she didn’t answer for some time. “I saw h—his name when I went to visit my grandmother. It was in a folder at the nurse’s station.”

I felt my own eyes narrow on the wildly beating pulse at her throat. “And you just happened to see it?”

“Yes.” She wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going to visit her?”

“Because you would have made a big deal about me going alone and while you were away.”

“You fucking think?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to tell the fucking truth!”

“Keiran, let it go.”