Feel the Burn (12 page)

‘At least it didn’t break,’ Sabyn pointed out, moving past the centaur to Loi’s side, and touched her arm. ‘What is it, are you okay?’

Annoyance flashed through Loi when she tried to focus and she waved a hand impatiently at him.

‘I’m fine; I think Cat’s wanting to link.’

Sabyn frowned for an instant then pressed a quick kiss to her forehead, his expression somber.

‘Why don’t you go sit out? Say hi for me.’

Loi nodded and walked to a box seat by the rail. The noise in the background faded while she called her energy up and the tension in her body evaporated as it spread.

Your energy seems stronger than before.

Loi jumped on the seat.

Cat?! Are you there?

Yes.

That disconcerted her. Loi had thought Cat wasn’t there yet.

You sound different; I didn’t even realize you were there.

Do I? I guess that makes sense, you three sound different to me.

Loi paused feeling suddenly guilty at the trivial thoughts.

Cat…hun…How are you?

The silence unnerved Loi, unable to tell if Cat still linked or not. There wasn’t the tell tale warmth or red glow that normally showed. Kassie and Sian linked in and their familiar glows of orange-gold and blue comforted Loi. Both the girls felt perplexed like she did about the strange silence.

Cat?
thought Sian.

I’m here.

An image appeared in Loi’s mind, sharp and clear from Cat’s perspective showing she sat with Kassie, Loushka, and Kerak at the head of the ship. Loi couldn’t believe the clarity of the image and with it came a rush of emotions from Cat. The image changed in a flash to Alek that morning on that strange stone floor and the weight of her sorrow and despair took Loi’s breath away. Behind the despair something else rang through the link, confusing Loi. A dark, ominous finality.

They all had Alek on their minds, whether they consciously realized it or not and I found it hard to conceal my thoughts from them. The apprehension I picked up made me realize some of my intent had snuck in. With a brief thought I threw the walls back up in my mind, preventing any further revelations.

I hadn’t paid much attention to the differences in our energies since the incident but now we linked it felt glaringly obvious. Previously we’d sat in each others’ mind on the same level and now, though I could hear and see what they thought, I felt withdrawn, like I sat on a balcony looking down. It gave me the ability to keep them out my mind if I wished it instead of having the link wide open both ways. This ability to have a one-way conversation, to listen and see but not have to share, disconcerted me at first but I appreciated the space it allowed. Sitting there on the deck with Kassie I absently listened to the girls chat while staring around, distracted by the glimmer of life lights. Everyone I could see glowed; the sailors and soldiers, the Halenine fae and goblins, even the griffons. They looked slightly transparent to my eyes and those flickering lights stood out, like when I’d shielded Belsesus while practicing. Normally I had to focus to see those lights but everyday now they looked more visible. All different colors. I watched, fascinated, and realized that the creature’s mood changed the color. Just like a mood ring I thought in amusement and I observed several Halenine fae annoying a Draoth who glared and muttered but didn’t risk swatting the malevolent little creatures. The life lights of the naughty fae flickered from muddy reds to oranges while the annoyed but wary Draoth’s life light showed a cautious ruddy brown.

Curious, I pulled back from the link with the girls and the colors vanished. I extended my energy within, allowing it to run beneath my skin without it showing to the others and without linking back to the girls; the life lights appeared again.

‘Cat?’

Kassie touched my arm and I felt probes from the girls’ energy so linked back into the conversation.

Loi tried to pull Cat’s link closer, not liking how distant she felt but it didn’t appear to work and the conversation petered out.

I wonder what our Earth parents thought happened to us?
Cat thought

Loi stayed quiet and she could feel Sian and Kassie struggling.

What?
demanded Cat.
What do you know? Tell me!

Through the link she watched Cat jerk away from Kassie, eyes accusing. Kassie reached out a hand to soothe her.

They think we’re dead, Cat,
Sian gently thought.
Elena checked to make sure we didn’t leave anything behind that would reveal too much. You remember all the candles we used for the ritual? The house burned to the ground. She made it very intense.

It’s better this way, Cat,
Kassie added.
They’re able to mourn this way, not spend their days searching for us.

Tears slipped down Loi’s face and she pulled her knees up on the seat, hugging them close. Sabyn, his eyes always on her, saw the tears and came to sit beside her. Leaning her head against him she threw a thought out.

Guys, I’m gonna go. Please keep in touch, Cat. I love you guys.

She dropped the link before they could question her and turned, weeping against Sabyn’s throat. He shifted a leg so he straddled the seat and wrapped his arms around her.

When Cat and Alek lay unconscious Loi had thought to ask Elena that question and the Sorceress showed her. Flames roared from within the house, the windows shattering and three fire engines fought to control the inferno. People watched; her parents and brothers stared with tragic expressions, mouths open and bodies shaking with sobs. Cat’s parents watched too, her mother screaming hysterically while her father held her; he’d looked ages older.

‘I still don’t get why she didn’t just tell us everything in the beginning,’ Loi said, her voice raspy with repressed anger and sorrow.

Sabyn looked down at her, his eyes pained.

‘Elena? She couldn’t really, goddess. She needed you to focus on training, not mourning.’

Loi turned her back so she leaned against his chest and Sabyn nuzzled at her neck. It still smarted, no matter how many months had passed.

In a low wobbly voice she said, ‘I don’t like her. We’re just pawns. She doesn’t care about us, just what we can do.’

Sabyn lifted his brows and nodded, acknowledging the truth in that.

‘You’re not wrong. This fight is personal to her. It’s her family versus Jenviet’s. Cat’s family got entangled when they offered asylum to the Mestarns. But this fight affects every creature on Gar’nyse.’

Loi sighed and dropped her chin, staring at the seat.

‘And she doesn’t care about us?’ she asked quietly.

He pushed the mass of hair aside to kiss the soft pale skin of her nape.

‘No, goddess, she cares. You have to remember, Elena is very old. She outlives most she knows and loves. It makes her more pragmatic than most. She sacrificed her own energy and strength to see you four safe.’

‘It’s an enormous risk.’

‘I think you can do it.’

‘I don’t know,’ she whispered, barely audible. ‘I don’t feel ready.’

Fear; he remembered feeling that before his first few battles. It kept you alive, kept you moving quickly, all senses on high alert. But nothing relieved it. Reassurances were pointless and no one could promise the outcome of such a battle. Sabyn could only offer honesty and support.

‘Tomiar and I will be right alongside you. We have the very best warriors on Gar’nyse. I can’t say it will be easy; but we’re going to do this, Loi.’

Strangely enough, saying that out loud helped him too. We’ll tear that witch and her castle to pieces, Al, Sabyn thought and anticipation built. I’ll damn well make sure of it. The sense of helplessness at his cousin’s death hadn’t diminished, but now he felt ready to move it to the back of his mind, to focus on the task at hand. In a way he relished knowing that for every enemy he brought down, his cousin and uncle—where ever they waited in the afterlife—would roar their support at each stroke. This fight wasn’t about loss anymore, now victory beckoned, the end of the tyrant who threatened this world. The familiar drive returned when he recalled discussing the trip South with the other men of the guard and that hunger for the battle. It stung, so damn deep, to know Alek wouldn’t fight alongside him in this battle. But if not in body, he’ll be there in spirit, Sabyn thought. Watching my back.

His arms held her tight, mouth resting against the back of her neck and Loi tipped her head back to study him. His forehead wrinkled a little and he stared back, a smile developing.

‘What?’

She reached to run a hand through his hair, loose on his shoulders and Sabyn arched an eyebrow then released an arm and caught her hand, pressing a kiss to the palm and nipped her wrist. His blue eyes flashed in amusement when she flinched and she wrinkled her nose then tugged his hair.

‘You seem better,’ she tentatively said, noticing the lack of anxious energy.

Sabyn smiled again, a slow teasing smile, her body recognizing that look in an instant.

‘Want to join me in the cabin?’ he murmured in her ear.

Loi stared for a second then jumped up from the seat. Sabyn chuckled and stood. She winked at him.

‘You don’t have to ask me twice.’

Slinging an arm around her, Sabyn slid his hand into her back pocket and they made their way to the lower decks.

* * *

I’ve had enough, Sian thought ironically. Stop the ride I want to get off.

It felt truly bizarre to think of what lay ahead. Part of her accepted the task, understanding what risk and danger stood before them. The other part of her felt completely detached like they acted out roles in a strange, surreal play. Sian’s mind varied from wanting to scream and panic, to hide under the covers and refuse to come out; to wanting to stick a motor on this bloody boat, get there, deal to the bitch and go home.

The frustration at the contradicting thoughts made her flip over in bed and huff a sigh out. Beside her Daron lay silent and she watched the moonlight flickering on the ceiling, reflecting off the water. I know Alek and Yakov are dead, she thought in an attempt to get her head in the right space. Tears welled in her eyes while she stared at the low ceiling of the berth bed. I know we head to a war zone, I know we will fight Jenviet and I know we have to win.

Then why doesn’t it feel like it!

Her hands clenched to fists when she tried to get it to feel right in her head. To feel real.

A large hand gently covered one of hers.

‘This’ll sound silly,’ she tried to say it lightly but her throat thickened and she croaked the words. ‘But it still doesn’t feel real, properly real.’

Daron let go of her hand and reached over, dragging her closer. Sian twisted, nose to his chest and arms pressed to her chest between them.

Daron shifted her so to slip his other arm around her tiny frame. He didn’t feel like saying anything while he cradled her; words always felt so pointless at these times, but he made the effort for her.

‘It’s not silly.’

‘Will it ever feel real?’

Real. Hell, knowing that Alek and Yakov had died still didn’t feel real. Reality appeared to have left this journey that morning they set sail. Daron couldn’t begin to explain to Sian how close he’d been to Alek, how close he and the others were. Over a decade of working alongside each other, learning, fighting, and protecting each other. Long sleepless nights when they fought horrendous creations from that witch. The constant threat of death that they’d always managed to evade. Somehow. No matter the odds. So many times where one of them was assumed dead and yet the Griffon Guard always pulled through.