Feels Like Home: A Southerland Family Contemporary Romance Book 1 (23 page)

She watched him, a small crease forming
between her brows, and he knew she was waiting for him to say
something. He wanted to, but his mouth had gone dry and he wasn’t
sure he could speak.

“
Beautiful,” he croaked and
then coughed to clear his throat. “You look beautiful.”

“
She does, doesn’t she?”
said Summer, coming in from the kitchen. “Hello there, Dr.
Southerland.”

He told her over and over to call him Jude,
but she never did. He’d finally given up. When she first came home
from the hospital, she’d been quiet and awkward around him. But
living with Autumn was good for her. She’d put on weight and her
cheeks had gotten some of their color back. She still looked like
she’d blow away in a stiff breeze, but she was definitely
better.

“
Hey, Summer, you guys
going to be okay if I whisk your sister off for the
night?”

“
Of course. Have
fun.”

“
Are you sure, honey? I
could come back after dinner if you want,” said Autumn.

“
Don’t be crazy,” said
Summer and something meaningful passed between the
sisters.

Autumn nodded and turned her attention to
Jude. “Ready?” she asked, plastering a too bright smile on her
face.

“
Can Max stay?” asked an
eager Abby.

“
If it’s okay with your
mom. I was kind of hoping you could watch him for me.”

Abby looked at Summer who nodded her
approval.

“
Thank you so much,” she
said, squeezing the dog.

Jude saw something wistful and sad pass
across Autumn’s face. That wouldn’t do at all.

“
Come on, gorgeous,” he
said, catching her in his arms. “I’ve got some place I want to take
you.”

He spent the long quiet ride to the
restaurant trying to figure out what he could say that would take
the sadness away from behind her eyes. He’d picked the Millstone
because he thought she might like to get out from under the watch
of the Ladies Auxiliary for a night. They drove the forty minutes
out of town and through the flat valley at the base of the Blue
Ridge.

He’d always loved the drive, the long stretch
of highway cutting the almost impossibly flat valley with the blue
gray mountains climbing on either side. He glanced at the
speedometer and then over at Autumn. Her hand gripped the arm of
the door and he eased his foot off the gas. It was easy to lose
track of the speed on this bit of road and the last thing he wanted
to do was make her nervous.

She inhaled and relaxed a little. “It’s so
beautiful out here. I haven’t been this way in years.”

He looked at her watching the fields of beef
cattle pass the window at a more reasonable speed.

“
I’ve always loved this
drive. In some ways I think it makes the mountains seem even bigger
than they do driving up the Peaks. Maybe it’s the contrast between
the mountains and the flat.”

“
It’s so flat. It’s easy to
imagine the mountains eroding and the valley filling up with
silt.”

“
They used to be huge you
know – the old Appalachians.” Autumn turned to face him and he
reached for her hand. “Millions of years ago, these mountains were
so tall clouds couldn’t pass over them. Birds stopped on either
side, unable to fly across.” He lifted her hand to his lips and
brushed a kiss over her knuckles. “They were that big.”

“
You’re making that up.”
She looked at him, one eyebrow arched and a crease in her brow.
“They can’t have been that tall.”

“
I am not and they were,”
he said, slowing to make the turn into the gravel parking lot in
front of the old wooden building.

When the car came to a stop, he hurried to
her side to get the door for her. He guided her onto the wraparound
porch and kept his hand on the small of her back as he opened the
door. Her skin felt warm through the clingy red fabric and he was
reluctant to let her go when the hostess showed them to their
table.

“
I hope this is
okay?”

“
Perfect,” she said, her
eyes shining in the light of the candles and the warm copper glow
from the tabletop. “I’ve always wanted to come here, but I’ve never
had the chance.”

“
You’ll love it. The food
is amazing. It reminds me a little of Bailey’s restaurant. Fresh
seasonal food and unpretentious. The menu is constantly changing,
but I’ve never had a bad meal.”

“
I forgot your sister has
her own restaurant.” She looked up from her menu and smiled at him.
“That’s impressive, especially given how many fail.”

“
She’s always loved to
cook. Daddy used to say she was going to grow up to be Alice
Waters. I guess she has.”

He glanced at his own menu just long enough
to decide and then reached for her hand. When the server came to
recite the specials, she tried to pull it back, but he kept it
clasped in his larger hand. He waited until they’d placed their
orders and then turned her hand over so he could rub soft circles
across her wrist with his thumb. Her lips parted and his body
sprang to life at the effect his touch had on her.

“
I’m so glad you let me
take you out. I missed you.”

“
You see me every
day.”

“
It’s not the same and you
know it.”

She smiled at him, turning her hand to twine
her fingers with his. “I know. I’ve missed you, too.”

“
Is everything going okay
with having Summer and Abby move in?”

“
It is. I love having them
there. I’ve missed so much of Abby’s life already. I don’t want to
miss anymore.”

He watched Autumn’s face lighten as she
talked about her niece. He could imagine the impact the little girl
had on the old house. She was a smart, precocious ball of sunshine.
He barely knew her and he loved her already.

“
Is Summer doing all right?
No more trouble? No more Dwayne?”

She pulled her hand away.

“
Summer is fine. She’s
doing really well. We’re doing really well together. Thank you,”
she said, her voice gone icily polite.

What the hell had he said this time?

“
Honey, I didn’t mean
anything by it. I was just checking to make sure everything was
okay.” He wanted to reach for her but thought better of it. With
the fire blazing in her blue eyes, she was as likely to bite off
his hand as she was to hold it.

She nodded but didn’t look appeased.

“
What’s wrong? What can I
do to fix it? Things between us haven’t been right since we went
out on the boat. Is it what Andrew said?”

She didn’t say it out loud, but the flash in
her eyes told him that was it.

“
Please don’t listen to
him, Autumn. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. I talked to
him. He won’t say anything again. I made it clear what would happen
if he did.”

“
You’ve been friends
forever,” she said, her face stricken.

When he reached for her this time she didn’t
pull away, but she didn’t hold his hand back.

“
Besides he didn’t say
anything that wasn’t true. He only wants what’s best for
you.”

“
You’re what’s best for
me.”

Her eyes shone bright with unshed tears and
she shook her head. “My family is nothing like yours.”

“
I don’t care. I’m not in
love with your family. I’m in love with you.”

“
You should know better
than anybody that you can’t separate the two.”

She looked so sad, so resigned. It made him
desperate to convince her.

“
I mean it, Autumn. You are
what’s best for me. I love you.”

He watched her war with herself, expressions
flashing across her face.

“
I love you, too,” she
finally said, but it sounded sad and too much like
good-bye.

Autumn took a bite of her shrimp and grits.
The stone ground corn and sharp cheddar were probably delicious,
but she couldn’t taste anything. All she could think about was Jude
and how much she was going to miss him.

Summer had spent the last week berating her
for trying to put distance between them. She seemed convinced
Autumn and Jude could make a go of it, but she didn’t understand.
Autumn told her what happened on the boat, but with her sister
still recovering from the overdose and Dwayne, she couldn’t bring
up the issues with their families. Summer was embarrassed enough by
what happened.

Now that she loved him, Autumn couldn’t
handle a casual relationship and as much as he protested to the
contrary, she knew that’s all they could have.

They were from different worlds. Andrew might
have acted like an ass, but he understood that, and now it looked
like her relationship with Jude was coming between the two men.
They’d been friends forever. She didn’t want to be the one who
wrecked their friendship.

She glanced up from her plate and away from
her thoughts to see Jude watching her. His hazel eyes looked kind
and concerned and she was struck again by how handsome he was. The
collar on his white dress shirt hung open, revealing a v of tanned
skin. She knew what that skin would smell like when she nuzzled his
neck, the soft touch of his throat turning into the rasp of stubble
on his jaw. The candlelight carved the planes of his face into
chiseled angles, strong and masculine against the soft line of his
lips.

His lips curved in a smile as he caught her
looking at them. He didn’t just smile with his mouth. When Jude
smiled everything good and kind and just shone through his eyes. He
turned all that attention on her and every fiber of her being
wanted him, wanted to bask in that energy.

She already loved him more than she thought
possible. Enough to know she wouldn’t survive getting in deeper and
then having things not work. And they couldn’t work, not in the
long run, but God that didn’t mean she didn’t want it.

She could spend the day tomorrow singing
along with Adele and eating Dove bars, but for tonight she’d live
in the moment instead of the past. She’d give herself this one last
night with Jude and then in the morning, she’d find a way to say
good-bye and pray she had the strength to walk away.

Jude watched Autumn climb the stairs in front
of him and fought back a groan. The red fabric slipped and slid
over the round curve of her ass and the draped neckline of her
dress showed a generous amount of bare skin on her back. Enough for
him to know she wasn’t wearing a normal bra.

He’d missed her so much, and the casual
touches of the past week hadn’t done anything to quench his hunger
for her. When he’d caught her watching him at the restaurant his
heart swelled thinking maybe she missed him, too.

He wanted to take her to his bed, strip her
naked, and spend the next four or five hours worshipping every inch
of her. Giving her enough pleasure to burn the sadness from around
her eyes. He loved her so much. It still shocked him a little at
how quickly it had happened, but he wasn’t going to question
it.

He wouldn’t let her question it either.

At the top of the steps, he reached around
her to open the door. That simple touch, the brush and press of her
body against his was enough to undo him. Never letting his body
break contact with hers, he guided her into his apartment. He held
her from behind and positioned her hands against the wall.

“
Keep them here,” he
murmured into her ear and felt her tremble.

Brushing her hair to the side, he kissed and
bit his way along her neck. She arched her back, pressing the cleft
of her ass into his groin.

His erection throbbed with the tempo of his
heart and for one delicious moment he let himself go, grinding
against her while he inhaled the spicy floral scent he would always
know as hers. Cupping the soft mound of her belly with one hand, he
used the other to turn her head to give him better access to her
throat.

Her breath came in shallow gasps and he felt
her pulse flutter under his mouth. Working his way along her neck
and across her shoulder, he licked and kissed his way to her back.
He left a trail of kisses down her spine, not stopping until he
reached the zipper on her dress.

With shaky hands, he unfastened the small
metal hook and tugged down the zipper. The fabric parted, sliding
off her shoulders and revealing the smooth curve of her back. The
sight of her with her hands against the wall arched back toward him
took his breath away.

“
My God, you’re beautiful,”
he said, his voice low and rough with need.

He stepped in closer, covering her body with
his and clasping her hands. He nuzzled the tender skin behind her
ear and eyes closed and lips parted, she tipped her head back to
meet him. He claimed her mouth, teasing her lips apart. One at a
time, he lowered her hands and let the dress fall to the floor
before stretching her against the wall again.

He caught her needy cries with his mouth as
he stroked the skin of her arms, making long passes from her
fingertips down to her back. Breaking the kiss, he stepped back so
he could look at her. She wore some kind of low backed strapless
bra the same color as her dress with a matching garter belt and red
lace panties.

His mouth went dry and he fought the urge to
fall to his knees at her feet. Stretched in a long line with her
arms above her head and her hands still on the wall, she was
breathtaking. His gaze travelled down the length of her body to the
place where the garter caught her stockings and on down to the
black high heels. With her red lips, flushed skin, and dark tousled
hair she looked like a sexy pin up girl.