Feros and the Underworld Prince (18 page)

“
We’re only going to be sleeping, okay?” Natasha asks as she backs her ass up into me. My ‘other head’ seems to notice Natasha’s lack of clothing before my brain does; my ‘other head’ moves to attention before I ruthlessly beat it down.

“
Why are you doing this to us, bro!? Her intention is obvious!” my ‘other head’ says.

“
O-K-A-Y?” Natasha reiterates, turning a two syllable word into a four syllable word while grinding her as ass against me with every syllable.

There is only so much that a man can take. I allow ‘Captain Bonerhelmet’ to take the forefront of this mission as I grind myself against her. I throw my arm around her as I kiss her neck before nibbling her earlobe.

“
Okay; this will be my first time with the new arm so tell me how you like it while we are
only sleeping
.” I whisper in her ear.

“
Condoms are in the top drawer.” Natasha whispers back.

I set my left hand on the hump of her breasts before trailing it down to her navel. When my hand dips into the indent, I continue down further.

(HA! It’s like fingering by braille!)

This is one of those times when having no feeling in your hand is a bad thing. Actually, I haven’t had a time when having no sense of touch in my hand has been advantageous… although masturbating was slightly more enjoyable… you know, after I got the ‘brush strokes’ right; I’m not ambidextrous. Natasha’s breathing intakes sharply in response, which I’m not sure is a positive thing. My fingers are now rock hard, obviously, but they are also somewhat cold at times.

“
Sorry… it gets kind of cold sometimes.” I say sort of timidly.

“
No, it’s fine… keep going.” Natasha replies in a sultry tone.

I keep fingering her for several minutes when I decide that I need to step up my game because I still haven’t even felt her get close to finishing… wait, how am I supposed to feel her when I can’t feel my fucking hand to begin with!? I slide my right arm out from underneath me and grab her ass. I spread some natural ‘WD-40’ with my right hand before I glide a finger into the ‘back door’.

“
mmhmm!” Natasha moans in response.

I ‘play the back nine’ for a minute before I slide a second finger in. I keep that up until my right arm goes ‘pins and needles’ numb, forcing me to stop. This really isn’t a great position for me to be in with my arm… Batter Up!

“
Alright ‘little head,’ we have two runners on first base, but our second base runner just got domed with the ball and has been taken out of the game. It’s up to you to bring us home!”

“
I can do it coach!”

“
I know you can you crazy little bastard! You have a small strike zone and a corked bat! It’s impossible for you to lose! Just get out there, keep swinging, and know that having an unlimited number of strikes is not like taking steroids; it’s a skill dammit!”

I honestly have no idea what the fuck is happening in my head anymore so I just reach behind me with my right hand, grab a condom out of the bedside table, tear the package open, and slide it on while continuing my efforts with my left hand. I reach back into the bedside table, finding the small bottle that I anticipated being present so I ‘oil up’ and slide ‘squeak-free’ through Natasha’s ‘back door’.

“
AHHMM!” Natasha screams, but it doesn’t sound like she’s in pain, so I continue.

Damn, I forgot how tight she is and this is quite a bit worse with my fingers in her as well. I end up at the bottom of the ninth about ten minutes later, but I just keep my blood from going anywhere and continue until I’m sure she’s satisfied.

I roll onto my back, breathing heavily while Natasha rolls over into my right side. I take the condom off and toss it into the bedside trashcan before wrapping my right arm around Natasha.

“
I missed you, Cole.” Natasha whispers while breathing heavily.

“
It was a classic case of not realizing what you had until it’s gone… I don’t plan on giving up so easily this time around…” Natasha mumbles as we drift off to sleep.

…

Chapter 18: The Steel Chair Effect

I awaken with an undeniable urge to take a leak. I unravel myself from Natasha and walk into the master bathroom. Upon hearing Natasha’s phone ringing as I finish washing my hands, I trot over and answer it so Natasha doesn’t have to wake up.

“
Hello, Natasha’s phone.” I answer.

“
Cole! Where in the hell are you guys!?” Carla demands.

“
Natasha’s apartment. What’s going on?” I ask.

“
You two should be here, that’s what’s going on!” Carla yells.

“
What are you talking about? You said that we are meeting at 7pm; that gives us about an hour and a half.” I retort while seeing that it is 5:29pm.

“
TIME DIFFERENCE DUMBASS! I SAID 1900
LOCAL TIME
!” Carla shouts.

“
SHIT!” I scream before hanging up.

“
NATASHA! WAKE UP! WE HAVE TO LEAVE LIKE THIRTY MINUTES AGO!” I shout while shaking her. Natasha jumps awake and then glares at me.

“
Why are you screaming?” Natasha asks with a contemptuous gaze.

“
Because the mission starts in fifteen minutes!” I exclaim.

“…
OH SHIT!” Natasha screams when things finally connect and scrambles to get dressed.

Recalling where my clothes are, I run into the living room to throw on my shirt and jacket. I throw one leg into my pants and start hopping around, trying to get my other leg in. I slip, fall, and catch the end table corner just above my left eye.

“
FUCK!” I scream out as I slide my pants on from my sprawled position on the ground.

“
What are you doing on the floor!? We have to go!” Natasha exclaims after running into the room.

“
Hurry and send me an image of the place then!” I tell her while grabbing her hand. The image arrives a few seconds later and I touch my triskele.

“
Made it!” I announce victoriously as we appear in front of Carla. Ryuji immediately starts laughing.

“
You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Carla says in disbelief while glaring at us.

“
What?” I ask.

Ryuji turns a webcam towards us; Natasha and I appear on the screen in high definition. We look really haggard, my left eye has a large gash above it, and anyone can tell at a glance that there is no way in hell that we haven’t had sex recently.

“
Okay Delta team, listen up; this mission is getting postponed for about an hour so just get some drinks, try to relax, and act casual. My plan will work better if everyone is drunk anyway. The Agency is buying the rounds.” Carla says into a communication system.

“
You two have thirty minutes to go home, shower, and try to make it look like Natasha wasn’t just involved in the shooting of a porno. Can you do that?” Carla asks rhetorically.

“
Yes ma’am!” We say before I grab Natasha’s hand and port us back to her penthouse. We both strip and hop in the shower together, but this is a ‘strictly business’ shower. Natasha is able to dry and style her hair in record time, and I port us back with three minutes to spare.

“
Much better. Alright, there’s a taxi out front that will take you to the club.” Carla informs us.

“
Here, you will need these.” Ryuji says while handing us tiny silicon earpieces and Natasha slips hers in.

“
Just speak and I should be able to pick everything up. I’ll relay any information if needed.” Ryuji explains while I try and fail to put the earpiece in. Natasha smirks at me, takes the earpiece, and puts it in for me.

Natasha and I proceed down to the main floor and into the awaiting cab. Natasha tells the man that we are headed to the nightclub called Izz and we arrive fifteen minutes later. There is a line that has to be at least thirty people long. I consider just doing the normal thing and waiting in line with Natasha, but I decide to act like a rich prick instead. I pull out my wallet, take out a one hundred dollar bill, and hold it up as I walk up to the bouncer. He puts his hand out to stop me but then he notices that I am indeed holding a one hundred dollar bill that could be his, so he takes that and lets Natasha and I in.

“
You go find a table and I’ll go get some drinks.” I say in case anyone is listening; it’s nice that the music isn’t ridiculously loud in this place. I start walking towards the bar, keeping an eye on Natasha as she walks around the dance floor and towards a table by the stairs in the back left corner. I walk up to the bar and wait to order my drink.

“
Man, the women in my life are so abusive! I can’t believe she shaved my head while I was sleeping.” I overhear a guy to my left say.

“
Quit your bitching; having a girl shave your head isn’t abuse, it’s a prank. My ex-girlfriend
stabbed
me last week!” I butt in.

“
Can you still consider it getting stabbed if she only got your arm?” the guy asks while pointing to my bandaged arm.

“
No, I got stabbed in my stomach.” I clarify.

“
Then what happened to your arm?” The guy’s friend asks.

“
Oh, she also set my suits on fire.” I tell them.

“
What does that—”

“
I was still wearing one of them.” I explain.

“
Wow… I guess it’s true that someone always has it worse… let me buy you a drink.” The guy says and I humbly accept.

We start drinking and talking about how crazy the women in our lives are. It’s probably around shot number three that I forget what I was here to do.

“
Hey yo bitch, you stepped on my sneaker!” A man says behind me.

Oh, right… Katka and the mission. He’s supposed to throw something at me and I’m supposed to punch the person behind him to start a giant bar fight. I look behind him and see this cute little curly haired girl with glasses, whom could easily be characterized as mousey. I have to punch her!? I can’t do that!

“
Oh, sorry about that. Here, let me buy you a drink to make it up to you.” I say.

“
COLE! What’s going on!? Just follow the plan! Ryuji has been screaming at you for the past ten minutes, and says you have been ignoring him, just blathering away!” Natasha thinks.

“
Really? I haven’t been able to hear Ryuji at all. And I can’t follow the plan.” I tell her.

“
What? Why not?” Natasha inquires.

“
Because there is this cute mousey chick with glasses behind Katka! I can’t punch her!” I explain.

“
Shit, Cole… Alright, Ryuji has a plan and one of the Delta members is working on it. Just wait for the cue.” Natasha says.

I wait for thirty seconds until I see a steel folding chair sail through the air before clattering on the floor without hitting anyone. Everyone stops and looks at it for about twenty seconds before going back to what they were doing.

“
Hahaha did you seriously think that was going to work!? That’s hilarious, but the steel chair effect isn’t real; steel folding chairs being thrown don’t start fights.” I say aloud, knowing that Ryuji could hear me.
5

“
I’ve got a plan, just follow along.” I tell everyone.

“
Umm, Cole? What are you going to do?” Natasha nervously asks as I make RDX coins that are filled with blood.

“
You’ll see. Be ready to run upstairs, I think this place is about to get busy.” I reply.

“
I have to go take a leak.” I tell the guys next to me. I get up and walk over to the DJ’s booth.

“
Hey, can I make a request?” I ask in a drunken manner as I spot a box near the base of the wall to my right that has several cables sticking out of it; looks like it’s just far enough to be taken out without collateral too.