Fighting Blind (7 page)

Theo

I sweep Moody’s leg, and he drops to the mat hard. Two hundred and twenty pounds of pure muscle doesn’t fall gracefully, and he curses, before locking my leg with his ankles, unbalancing me.

I let him bring me down. The ground is where I want to be. It’s my comfort zone. Where I win most of my fights.

Adrenaline races through my veins, edging me on, making my vision clearer. I know Moody’s next move even before he does. He grapples with me, using his weight to pin me to the ground.

He’s wasting energy, and I let him. Patiently I wait, until I feel the slight give in his hold. One square shot to the jaw, and I stun him enough to twist my body, contorting until I have him in a tight triangle choke.

“Bastard,” he sputters, just before tapping.

I release him, and we both lay on our backs panting.

“One more go?” I ask, with a smirk. I’ve won the last five out of six.

“Yeah.” Moody stands and cracks his neck. “One more round. I’m meeting Izzy over at Charlie’s around seven.”

I raise my eyebrows at him. “Izzy?  As in Isabelle Stewart?”

He shrugs, and taps my gloves, then starts circling me.

“I thought she left for some third world country. A mission trip or something?”

“Doctors without borders.” He throws a punch and I dodge it. “She’s back now.”

Catching him with a knee to the kidney, I use the momentum and slam my fist into his jaw, making him stumble backwards.

“Fuck.” He loses his cool, and comes at me with an uppercut that clips my chin.

He’s stronger, but I’m lighter on my feet, and I’m able to duck under his arm when he comes in for another blow.

“So are you two going to hook up?”

A low grumbling comes from Moody’s chest. “Fuck if I know. The girl’s too good for me.”

“No shit.”

Moody laughs arrogantly. “Not that I couldn’t show her a good time. I’d have her on her knees begging for my cock in her mouth before–”

A feminine cough makes me turn my head.

Shit.
Mackenzie.

With my attention diverted, I barely see Moody’s glove before it slams into the right side of my face. It must have been a hard shot, because my knees buckle and I black out.

Both Moody and Mac are hovering over me when I regain my senses.

“Dirty shot, asshole.” I grab his glove and let him pull me up.

Moody chuckles and slaps my back. “He’ll be all right.”

“Are you sure?” Mac chews on her bottom lip, eyes wide. She never did like watching me fight.

Her hair is pulled away from her face, exposing the soft lines of her jaw and neck. So fucking perfect. I’ve jerked off a half dozen times in the past two days, but nothing eases the constant ache between my legs.

“Theo?” Her lips draw down in a frown.

“Maybe I hit him harder than I thought.” Moody smirks at me, one brow raised.

“Five out of seven,” I remind him.

“Yeah but I got the TKO.” He shrugs and chuckles. “Maybe tonight’s looking lucky after all.”

When he walks by Mac, he winks and her cheeks go pink. 

I can still hear his deep laugh even after he’s disappeared into the change room.

“Asshole,” I mutter, pulling my gloves off.

“You’re sure you’re fine?” Mac runs the tips of her fingers across my temple.

I inhale, slow and easy, fearful any sudden movement will startle her. It’s the first intimate gesture she’s initiated, and it means something.

Hell. It means fucking everything.

For that second, her walls drop, and I swear I can see into her soul. The same desperate hunger, mirrored in her eyes.

She drops her hand and looks away, breaking the connection.

“Where’s Logan?” I frown down at her, suddenly uneasy. She wouldn’t leave the kid unless something was wrong.

“Your…” She swallows hard, and takes a deep breath before continuing. “Your mom came by. She’s watching her.”

Shit. My mom is going to be pissed that I didn’t call her to let her know about Mac.

“I didn’t realize she was stopping by. I would’ve warned you.”

“It’s okay.” She takes a step back and leans against the cage, arms crossed over her chest.

She’s wearing the same ratted old sweatshirt she always wears, same torn jeans. I need to take her out, buy her some new clothes.

“It was good seeing her.” She chews on her bottom lip, a flood of emotions skittering across her face.

I move towards her, bridging the gap between us. “I’m sure she feels the same way.”

Mac looks down at my bare chest, then quickly away.

“What’s going on?” I tilt my head and raise my eyebrows, trying to get her to look at me.

“I…” She takes a deep breath and picks at the thread on her sweatshirt.

She’s making me nervous with her fidgeting.

The gym is still crowded, and I know there are eyes on us, but I don’t give a shit. Ignoring her small protest, I pull her into my arms, and kiss her.

A small shuddering breath vibrates against my mouth. I know she feels something for me. Even if it’s just a tenth of what I feel, I’ll take it.

“Stop fighting this.” I rest my forehead against her, drawing my thumb over her bottom lip. “Stop fighting me.”

“I can’t.” She pushes on my chest and starts towards the cage door.

“Mac, stop.” The words come out more forceful than I intended, but I’m tired of her constantly running away. “Can’t what? What can’t you do?”

She freezes with her back to me.

I catch a few raised eyebrows from the other guys in the gym.

“Can’t do what, Mac?” I repeat, this time more evenly. “What are you scared of?”

“Everything.” The word is barely a whisper, not meant for my ears, but I hear it.

“The Mackenzie I know isn’t afraid of anything.” I circle around her, blocking her exit.

“People change.” She glances over my shoulder, eyes darting around the gym.

“Maybe. Or maybe they just forget who they really are.”

She looks at me and her eyes narrow. “I’m a screw up, Theo. Always have been. How many times have you bailed me out of trouble? You think this is any different? I need money and a place to stay. That’s the only reason I’m here.”

“Bullshit.” Her words are like a knife to my heart, but I know she’s striking out because she’s scared. I can see it in her eyes.

“God, you’re so blind.” She pushes on my chest, her face red, eyes watery. “I’m not who you think I am. Maybe I never was.” She pushes me again. “I’ll never be that girl.”

“Hit me if it makes you feel better, but I’m not going anywhere. You don’t run away from the people who care about you, the people who
love
you.”

Her face goes pale and she drops her hands to her side. I swear she looks like she’s about to pass out, so I reach out and grasp her elbows, steadying her.

“Don’t tell me I don’t know who you are. Maybe I know you better than you know yourself.”

Her mouth tightens in a thin line and her jaw clenches. I can tell she’s trying not to cry.

“Come here,” I take her hand, pulling her to the mat with me.

She gasps and fights me when I roll, so that she’s pinned beneath me.

“What are you doing?” Her voice is pitched. She pushes on my chest, but I keep her trapped.

“Do you remember why I started fighting?”

She glares up at me. “When your dad left.”

“Yeah. I started picking fights with kids at school. I thought my mom was nuts signing me up for martial arts, but she was right, it helped channel the anger.”

“I’m not angry.” She squirms under me, making my cock jump to attention.

“Maybe not, but something is scaring the shit out of you. Even if you never have to use it, it helps to know you have the power if you need it.”

She tilts her chin up and closes her eyes. “Everyone is watching.”

“They’re doing their own thing,” I lie, knowing there are a half dozen eyes on us. “Just a few moves. Something basic. Humor me.”

“Then you’ll let me go?”

“I’ll never let you go, Mac,” I say, completely serious.

“You know what I mean.”

“Yeah.”

“Fine,” she sighs.

It’s a small victory, but to me it’s huge.

With my right arm pinned against her chest, I grip her throat gently, but just enough to see the alarm in her eyes. She starts twisting, wriggling beneath me, pushing on my chest.

I’ve hit a nerve, but she needs to fight through the panic.

“Don’t waste your energy. I’m bigger than you. You’ll never get me off using just your strength. You need to think, be smart.”

She goes still beneath me. Her breathing quickens when I lower my head, so that our lips are only a few inches apart.

“You want to use your leverage. With your right hand, grab my wrist. With your other hand, cup my elbow.” I wait until she does what I say. “Good. Now trap my foot with yours, so that everything on the right side of my body is controlled.”

“This isn’t going to work. You’re too big.”

“You have no idea,” I murmur in her ear.

She mumbles and shakes her head. “This is so embarrassing.”

“Now, lift your hips.”

Her hips push against my cock, and I have to stop the moan that threatens to escape.

“Keep control of my arm and foot and bump me over.”

In one swift motion, she rolls me over on my back.

“You let me do that,” she says, smiling.

“No. You did it. Try again.”

We spend the next thirty minutes going over the same few moves. Technically, they’re advanced, but Mac picks them up with ease. By the end of it, she’s lying on her back panting, sweat dampening her forehead, and she looks more alive than I’ve seen her since she’s been back.

I pass her a water bottle, and grin. “You’re a natural.”

“Right.” She snorts, rolling her eyes. “I should get back. Your mom’s probably wondering where I am.”

“I doubt it. She loves kids. I’m sure her and Logan are having a blast. You know she’d adopt her as her grandkid if you let her.”

Mac’s expression changes instantly and her shoulders hunch forward as if she’s had the wind knocked out of her.

Shit, it’s like walking on fucking eggshells. I never know what’s going to set her off.

“It was a joke, Mackenzie.”

She’s gives a halfhearted smile, then quickly looks away. “I need to tell you something.”

Thank fucking God. I doubt I’m going to be happy about what it is, but at least she’s starting to open up.

“Okay, but not here.” I place my hand on her lower back, and feel her tremble under my touch as I guide her out of the gym.

Once upstairs, in the hallway between our apartments, I pull her into my arms and claim her mouth. She responds in full, her body melting against mine.

The connection between us is strong, despite how hard she tries to fight it.

My fingers knot in the hair at the nape of her neck, willing her to give herself to me completely. What I want is more than sex, more than just possessing her body. I want every fucking part of her. Her mind, her soul, her heart.

“Why?” Her question mingles with our kiss.

I don’t want to pull back, but the confusion I hear in that single word makes me stop.

“Why now?” Her voice is raspy, like she’s about to break, and I get the gut-wrenching feeling that it’s because of me. She looks up at me, blinking away tears. “What’s changed in the past three years?”

Is she fucking kidding? How could she not know how long I’ve wanted her?

I don’t let her go when she tries to pull away. Sure, there’ve been other women. But it was just sex. Nothing more.

“Nothing’s changed. I’ve always wanted you.”

She sighs deeply and closes her eyes. “I’m not just one of your girls, Theo.”

“I never asked you to be,” I bite out a little too roughly, making her flinch. But it pisses me off that she would even think that.

“That’s good to know.” Her expression turns bitter, eyes go cold.

I drop my hands and lean back against the wall, arms crossed. “Jesus, Mac. I can’t fucking read you.”

“Good thing you don’t have to. I’ll be gone soon.” She turns on her heels.

Anger and frustration boil up in me until I’m ready to blow. I slam my fist against the wall, feeling something snap in my hand as it goes through the drywall.

“Shit.” I pull it back, knowing I may have just fucked up my next fight. But right now I don’t care.

Mac’s eyes are wide, looking from me to the hole in the wall, then back at me. “You’re an idiot, you know that?”

“Why, because I fucking care about you?”