Fighting Fate: Book 2 of the Warrior Chronicles (21 page)

“I just want to feel like I
belong
in your company…like I have a right to love you and expect your love in return…if just for a while.”

Taryn looked at him, her heart jumping, tears in her eyes, that, as long as they were pretending, she felt entitled not to have to defend.

“Can you pretend to love me? Just for a little while…just until our contract expires?”

…

There were tears in Taryn’s eyes and a spear in her heart she intended to slay him with. That is, if her words didn’t kill him first.
Pretend?

He didn’t need to pretend a goddamned thing. And here she was, the supplicant,
asking
him to
pretend
to love her. Taryn had more balls than most of the men he’d met and yet not enough stones to ask for what she
really
wanted. How did one deal with such a woman?

He had no clue how to pretend anything.

When he was an ass, she forgave him. When he insinuated himself into her life, she let him. When he introduced her to his mother…her birth mother…she stayed. She put up with Sensei Schwartz and his ninja boot camp, which was no small thing. She put up with his crazy family. The only thing that sent her running was his lovemaking.

As much as that bruised his ego, such as it was, it also gave him hope. She didn’t fool him, not in this. She ran from him because she felt something more than
thanks
for their time together.

Jesse approached Taryn and cupped her face in both of his palms.

“I don’t need to pretend anything,
wife.
I’ve thought of you as my wife since we said our vows. You’re the one who insisted on calling what we have a contract. Not me.”

The kindness in his eyes nearly undid her. She couldn’t help it, she believed him.

“It is a contract. It has conditions and a finite term.”

“So does every marriage vow I’ve ever heard. Don’t kid yourself that what we have is any less than anyone else who’s ever said ‘I do’.”

Jesse pulled her to him with none of the gentleness in his tone. His eyes narrowed slightly, his body rigid, radiating an energy that was more than attraction or anger at her obtuseness. He kissed her, one arm locked around her lower back, the other holding her higher, his hand at her nape. Taryn threw her arms around him and kissed him back.

She was good, he’d give her that. She may have wanted to pretend the energy sparking between them and flowing in a giant Möbius strip around them, with no beginning and no end, wasn’t any different from any other relationship she’d experienced, but her reaction to him told him more than words could have that that was a lie. She put everything she wouldn’t say into her kiss. It did more than explore and it certainly gave, but not in an attempt to seduce. Taryn wasn’t that subtle with him now, she was channeling her deep need to belong, to be fully loved, into her mouth, her hands, her tongue.

Jesse pulled away from her. When she tried to follow, he held her firmly away from him. He wasn’t above using her desire for him. If she asked he’d tell her that too.

“Every time you pretend, I’ll call you on it.” Jesse said. “I won’t let you hide from me. You can lie to yourself. You can tell yourself whatever you need to, to get yourself through, but don’t expect me to not call you on your bullshit. I’ve seen inside you, Taryn. I see you and I love you. I won’t be pretending about that or anything else.”

Jesse let her go and ran both his hands through his shoulder length hair, holding his hands at the back of his head so he couldn’t grab Taryn again. This was too important to him to gloss over it with a quick roll in the sack.

“I’m going back to the main rooms. I’m not going to pretend I don’t want to explore the possibilities this room presents, I do. And we will. Just as soon as you find the courage to come to me honestly and without pretense. I’m easy, honey, but I’m not cheap. You’ll have to come to me naked with more than simple wanting in your heart.”

Jesse tossed her the key to the dungeon and headed to the heavy wooden door, where he stopped. Looking over his shoulder, he said, “The next time you give me that key I’ll show you just how medieval I can be. Until then, fair maiden, this is one knight you’re going to have to court with an honest heart.”

He opened the door, walked through, closing it with a soft click. He’d just left the woman he loved in a wet dream of a room with a look in her eye that said she’d be willing to show him heaven on earth if he stayed. It took every ounce of his courage to walk away, hoping she’d come to him unarmed, instead of running again.

On his way to the room Rhia Macleod made up for him and Taryn, he grabbed the keys to the Rover and Taryn’s cell phone. He wasn’t taking any chances. Jesse looked at his watch. He’d give her half an hour then he’d go get her. Thirty seconds after that he’d sink into her, courting or no courting.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

The doorbell to Sham’s home rang, jolting Mari out of her various plots to poison Sham without actually murdering the man. Murder was a mortal sin and she didn’t commit mortal sins when she could help it. Good Catholics didn’t go around doing those kinds of things. Even though Mari was fairly certain plotting poisoning was sinful, it was worth the time in purgatory for the sheer salacious temporal joy it brought. In fact, in the forty-eight hours since Shay left, she’d felt the best since she settled on mandrake and nutmeg tea. The thought came to her after watching
Arsenic and Old Lace
on the late night feature as she raided Sham’s kitchen.

The doorbell chimed again and since she was the only one in the house, she went to answer it. Magnus left early for the art museum and her father was having breakfast with the widowed mother of the woman who battered Sham’s face. Mari opened the door wide, coming face to face with two women baring gifts.

“Good morning?” Mari said, her voice a question.

“Good morning, Mrs. Alexander.” Said the shorter woman with light red hair and striking turquoise eyes, sticking out a small hand in a masculine gesture. “My name is Reed Mohr and this is my aunt, Finn Platzke. Shay asked us to check in and make sure you’re comfortable.”

The blond Amazon who didn’t look old enough to be Reed’s aunt stifled a laugh, then choked. Reed hit her aunt in the middle of the back with a wallop that would have made Magnus stagger. The blond held her ground well enough and smiled unrepentantly at Mari, making Mari decide right then and there that she was going to like Reed’s aunt.

“You mean he made you promise to check up on me and make sure I stay where he left me.”

Finn grinned and Reed flushed before she too gave up trying to pretend this was something less than it was. “That about sums it up.”

“You’d better come in then.” Mari gestured toward the interior of the foyer, holding the door wide. “I was just plotting what to poison Sham with on his return. You’re welcome to join me in my effort.”

Finn was the first one through the door, handing Mari a basket full of bakery. “Those are flax-seed and cranberry muffins. I made them this morning. I’d give you my recipe so you could add your poison to them, but Shay never eats them.”

Both women made themselves busy in the kitchen, Reed unloaded a casserole dish and four bottles of wine. Finn made tea. Before Mari was settled, new plates, tea, butter and the muffins were on the table and her guests were sitting beside her. Finn took a muffin, broke it into pieces and popped some in her mouth, not seeming to notice it had a small twig sticking out of it.

“So what are you planning to use?” Finn asked, seeming genuinely curious. “Candied ginger and pineapple mixed with some bran makes Shay stay within five feet of the toilet for about a day. I learned that by happy accident.” Finn shrugged. “He hasn’t eaten anything I’ve baked since, so you’ll have to think of your own delivery system.”

“Knock it off, Finn. Mari will think you’re serious.”

“I am.”

“She’s
not.
” Reed narrowed her eyes at her aunt, who shrugged and continued to eat her muffin, un-intimidated.

Like everything else in this place, these women were slightly off. They didn’t seem to be anything other than what they presented. Mari found that refreshing. She poured tea, first for her guests and then for herself, wondering how to respond.

“Try a muffin.” Finn gestured to the basket of dark saucer sized baked goods with small sticks and what looked to be bits of carrot sticking out of the surface.

“Uh…no thank you. I just finished eating.”

“Wise choice.” Reed said.

Finn’s brows shot together making Reed explain. “You just got done telling her she’ll risk twenty-four hour diarrhea if she eats that. Why would she risk it?”

Apparently Finn just couldn’t be offended. She popped another bit of muffin in her mouth, talking around it. “Good point.”

Reed looked at Mari, making her uncomfortable. She felt like Reed was looking into her soul, seeing things she hadn’t said and worse yet wouldn’t acknowledge, even to herself. “Would you really poison Shay?”

“I’d prefer to put him over my knee and smack away two decades of pain, but I doubt Sham…ah…
Shay
…would lay still for it.”

Reed looked at her hard for a second before a full, sincere smile transformed her face from attractive to heart-stopping-beautiful. The woman had beautiful teeth, but then all the Americans Mari’d met seemed to wear their perfect teeth like a birthright.

“No, Shay wouldn’t stay still for that, but if he thought he’d wronged you he’d probably let you hit him in his beautiful face. More’s the pity. I’m going to miss teasing him about his perfect nose.”

Mari saw the love Reed had for her Sham written clearly in every line of her face and reflected in the softness of her extraordinary eyes. What surprised Mari wasn’t the depth of emotion the other woman felt for the man Mari thought she’d marry, it was that she wasn’t the least bit threatened by the love Shay and Reed shared. Why that should be so, Mari couldn’t say, but questioning it wouldn’t change the fact, so she rolled with what she intuitively knew. Shay loved her still. He loved Reed too, and Reed him. Those facts would never take away what Mari knew he felt for her.

“Why do you want to hurt Shay?” Reed asked without condemnation.

“He left. He didn’t come back.” Mari answered, surprising herself with her honesty.

“Have you asked him why he left?” Finn said. “Shay rarely does anything without a reason. To leave someone like you, it must have been a real doozy.”

“Someone like me?”

Finn cocked her head. “Yeah, someone he loves. Since you’re the only one who fits that bill, it must have been one hell of a good reason.”

“You think Sham loves me?”

Both women looked at Mari like she’d just lost fifty I.Q. points and nodded as if the answer to her question was self evident and didn’t merit a verbal reply.

Mari felt the sudden urge to cry. Finn was right. Sham rarely did anything without contemplating all the ramifications. He didn’t think one step ahead, he thought five steps ahead. He never had one plan or one way out of a jam, he had three. The Sham she knew never did anything on a whim with the exception of asking her to marry him.

Mari put her head in hands and looked deeply into her teacup, hoping the leaves would spell out what she should do. “You know, I was really hoping I’d dislike the two of you. It’s surprisingly hard not to like the people he chose to make his family. If I can’t beat him and I can’t poison him, what in bloody-hell am I going to do?”

Mari heard a chuckle, soft at first, then both of her guests were rolling with it. She looked up to be greeted with two conspiratorial grins. “Oh dear heart, not to worry. We’ll sit here until we think of something wonderful.”

Mari sat up, wiped her tears, and felt more hopeful than she’d felt in two decades. Maybe, just maybe, she could just reach out and grab her happily ever after and hang on tightly. She could always feed him candied ginger and pineapple when inevitably her Shamrock did something stupid. That thought cheered Mari considerably.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Jesse left her standing in the middle of a room designed for sensual delights, alone. That one word resonated through Taryn’s mind, etching itself onto her psyche in a way that seemed immutable.

Alone…alone…alone…

She blinked, seeing the old woman from her dream, eyes the color of the Caribbean sea staring at her from her mind’s-eye echoing the word:
Alone.

Taryn shook her head, dispelling the image. If only she could get rid of the hollow feeling inside her as easily. Looking around at this room made for lovers to delight in one another, Taryn felt a wave of dizziness followed by nausea start at her toes and rush to the tip of her head, making her feel the tingling sensation of hair growing. Then it ripped downward, fast, like she’d just swallowed concrete jaw-breakers.

Alone…alone…alone…

Making her way across the room to the sink on unsteady feet, trying to control the rushing in her ears, Taryn leaned her left arm heavily on the counter and turned on the cold water, letting it run until it was just the liquid side of icy. She splashed her face and rinsed the metallic taste from her mouth. She grabbed a glass from the cupboard, filled it with water and drained it, trying to dilute the acid in the pit of her stomach. When that didn’t do the trick she filled the glass again, swallowing in jerky movements that hurt her throat.

Taryn made her way to the bathroom. She turned on the multi jet shower, stripped, and entered with little thought other than to clean away the film of disappointment Jesse dusted her with before leaving.

Alone.

Taryn had no idea how long she washed, rinsed and then washed again. Time wasn’t registering as it should have. She turned off the water and stepped out onto a thick, cream colored sheep’s skin rug. Leaving her discarded clothing where it fell, Taryn dressed in one of the incredibly soft, plush, white robes with deep crimson piping. She slipped her feet into satin slippers from a shelf that must have housed thirty pair. She finger-combed her hair back from her face, barely making out her distorted reflection in the fogged mirror. Putting the key to the dungeon in her robe pocket she headed out the door and into the warm sunshine of the day.