Finding June (14 page)

“What is that?” I asked in awe. It felt as if
she were rubbing air over my cheeks.

“Silicone based primer. It feels like silk
wrapped in satin and dipped in heaven,” she said in what I would
describe as a dreamy voice but was, in reality, probably just a
less monotone voice. “It makes your skin look flawless and helps
the foundation stay in place. Now close your eyes.”

I did as I was told, allowing her to fix all
of the damage I had done by stressing and staying awake all night
while I listened to Ryan and Benjamin bicker about some app they
had just downloaded.

“Because it doesn’t actually work,” Ryan was
saying.

“But it’s a strobe light. It’s just . . .
funny,” Benjamin replied, his voice full of fervor.

“Do you really get yourself into that many
situations where you think ‘Hmmm, if only I had a strobe light app
on my phone’?” Ryan asked.

“You’d be surprised,” Benjamin said with a
mischievous grin.

“Never mind. I’m sorry I asked.”

“Don’t open your eyes. I’m putting fake
lashes on you,” Candice said, interrupting my eavesdropping.

I kept my eyes firmly shut, not wanting to
have her miss and glue my lids together. Even though it was early
in the morning and I was scared out of my mind for the inevitable
humiliation I’d have to face in front of the camera, I couldn’t
help but notice how at home I felt in the little trailer with
Candice, Benjamin, and Ryan. It was pretty clear to me who my
on-set friends were so far, though I could only hope that Lukas
would soon become another on-set friend . . . or boyfriend . . .
whichever I could manage, really.

“Uh-oh,” Ryan said, sounding suddenly close
to me. “Look at the grin New Girl has.”

“Do you have any scenes with him today?”
Benjamin asked knowingly. I felt myself blush under the freshly
applied makeup and hoped Candice had put enough on me that the
others couldn’t see it.

“Wait, are you talking about that tool Lukas
Leighton?” I heard her ask behind me.

“New Girl has a crush on him,” Benjamin
confirmed sadly.

“Oh please. The guy is dumb as a rock,”
Candice said.

“He seems sweet,” I said timidly.

“Great,” she replied sarcastically. “Just
find out for yourself, then. Don’t let us persuade you. You’re
done, by the way.”

I opened my eyes to see if Candice had been
able to fix all of my red puffiness and—much to my amazement—she
had. I was assuming that my vaudeville makeup would be dramatic,
but I didn’t realize just how striking the effect would actually
be. My lips were painted a deep red, my porcelain skin looked
almost transparent, and my eyelids were smoky black with shadow
smudged right under my lower lids. The most dramatic thing,
however, were the fake lashes she had applied. They had to be
almost an inch long.

“You look like a porcelain doll, New Girl,”
Benjamin said approvingly.

“But you might actually cause a wind storm
every time you blink with those lashes, so you may want to be
careful,” Ryan added with a smirk.

“Candice, you’re incredible,” I said, almost
not recognizing this dark and mysterious version of myself.

“I’m okay,” she answered modestly.

"Humility isn’t a good color on you,
Candice,” Benjamin said seriously while he texted. “You already
know you’re good. Don’t put on a show for New Girl.”

“You’re right. I am pretty brilliant,” she
confessed happily. “Anyway, you can go get some breakfast now if
you want.”

“I’ll show you where the cafeteria is,” Ryan
offered, picking up his coffee and leading me out of the trailer.
“Do Benjamin first, I’ll be back soon,” he added to Candice.

“New Girl, you can mess up the lipstick, but
if you ruin your eye shadow there’ll be hell to pay,” Candice
yelled out the trailer door as I walked away with Ryan.

“That was a frightening mood swing,” I said
with a giggle as we entered the small cafeteria, which was really
just a room in the production office filled with long picnic tables
and a buffet table pushed against the wall.

“That’s Candice,” he stated, studying my
face.

“What?” I asked, suddenly self-conscious.

“Nothing. You’re just mixing a few time
periods here,” he said with a grin, his deep blue eyes sparkling
with his own private joke. “You’re dressed very fifties, but then
you have this turn-of-the-century hair with twenties makeup. The
effect is very . . . confused,” he laughed.

“I’m sure it’ll fit once I’m in costume—and
how do you know so much about fashion?” I asked.

“I watch a lot of movies,” he said.

“Period pieces, though?” I asked
skeptically.

“Any movie. I don’t have very discriminating
taste,” he answered with a shrug. “Speaking of which, do you see
anything you want to eat?”

I looked at the buffet table, which was
loaded with fruits, bagels, toast, and little cereal boxes. I
plucked a red apple from a nearby bowl and turned my attention back
to Ryan.

“Done,” I said happily.

“Apparently you don’t have very
discriminating taste either,” he joked as we walked back to the
hair and makeup trailer.

“Exactly,” I replied, taking a crunchy bite
out of my apple and smearing my red lipstick all over it.

“So, you and I don’t have a scene together
until Thursday,” Ryan said, stopping right outside of the
trailer.

“We have a scene together?” I asked. I
couldn’t remember ever reading anything with Ryan in the
script.

“Well, sort of. We don’t speak or anything,
but we are in the same scene . . . ” he trailed off. “But it should
be fun, anyway. At least you won’t feel like you’re outnumbered by
The Tall Ones,” he said, using Candice's phrase to refer to the
show’s stars.

Mentally going over the cast list, I could
see why Ryan and Benjamin chose to isolate themselves from the rest
of the cast a little . . . or maybe why the rest of the cast kept
them at a distance. Will Trofeos, Lukas Leighton, Joann Hoozer, and
Anna Farthing were all big names in Hollywood. They were constantly
in movies and the paparazzi followed them obsessively. Ryan and
Benjamin, on the other hand, were best known for
Forensic
Faculty
. They had been in other movies before, and every once
in a while I’d find a picture of them in a magazine, but they
didn’t cause the same feeding frenzy the rest of the cast caused.
It was like they were part of the show, but not part of that elite
group of acting royalty. Somehow, as crazy as it seemed, it made me
like them more. It made them feel more approachable.

“Well, at least I know I’ll have someone to
talk to on Thursday if it turns out Lukas isn’t as sweet as he
seems,” I said with a wan smile.

“I know we teased you about him, but I think
he’s a pretty good guy. I mean, I haven’t spent much time with him
outside of work, but he’s a nice guy to work with so I don’t have
any complaints. We just know his reputation, which is why we feel
the need to warn you. If what they say is true, then he’d love to
snag some sweet, innocent, unsuspecting victim like you,” Ryan said
darkly.

“I appreciate your concern,” I said honestly,
“but I’ll be fine.”

CHAPTER 12

The chaotic atmosphere on set was far
different from the laid-back feeling of the makeup trailer. I had
already changed into my costume and was now sitting on a chair
behind the camera while a stand-in took my spot under the glaring
lights. They measured the distance from her nose to the camera,
made little changes in lighting, and did all sorts of imperceptible
alterations that required a warm body to be in my spot.

My studio teacher and I had met earlier that
morning, so I used my free time to work on the assignments she had
given me. It was definitely nice that my on-set curriculum
corresponded with my actual classes, because it made the transition
between the two seamless. I was able to complete assignments in
fast motion without the distractions of school, though, and I soon
ran out of work, leaving me to stare at the crew as they bustled
about. I looked over my shoulder every five seconds to see if Lukas
Leighton and Will Trofeos had come in yet, but they were running
late.

I let out a deep sigh and closed my eyes,
trying to steady my nerves for the moment when I actually had to do
some acting. The studio was cold, since acting under all of the
lights would be like sitting in an oven. Behind the camera, I was
forced to wear a coat over my costume to I wouldn’t become a human
popsicle. There wasn’t a whole lot to my costume, and I couldn’t
help but wonder if Gran would be a bit angry with me when she saw
how immodest it was. Granted, it wasn’t immodest for normal TV
standards, but I can safely say it wasn’t something I would ever
wear to a church dance.

I was supposed to be dressed as my character,
Imogen Gentry, after she had come home from a performance. I had on
black fishnet tights, low black heels, and the most amazing dress I
had ever seen. The bodice was tight black satin with a corset back
that they had laced so tight I could hardly breathe. It had thick
straps and a sweetheart neckline that, combined with the corseting,
emphasized my . . . well . . . we’ll say, womanly features. It was
definitely not something I was used to flaunting, that’s for sure,
and I was feeling distinctly uncomfortable being so on display. I
had even loosened the laces of the corset when the crew wasn’t
looking, just a bit to make me feel at least a little more
modest.

The skirt of the dress was the really
incredible part of the costume. The entire thing was made of long,
iridescent, dark green feathers that ended a few inches above my
knees and bustled out behind me, giving me a very particular
Victorian Gothic look. The crowning jewel of the costume was a
black lace choker with a single dangling ruby pendant that, I felt,
looked like a target to draw attention to my bust. The more I
thought about it and the more looks I got from the crew, the more I
felt like I wasn’t being paranoid. That was definitely what they
were going for with this particular piece of jewelry.

The sound of a door opening behind me
announced the entrance of Will and Lukas, and my stomach
automatically tightened once more. I tried to keep the blood from
rising up in my cheeks and took a steadying breath before standing
up to greet them. Will got to me first, since Lukas had stopped to
check his reflection in his phone screen.

“Miss Laurie, you look beautiful,” Will
Trofeos said in his thick Spanish accent. His eyes roamed over me
appreciatively and I resisted the urge to shudder a bit at this
blatant display of admiration. I was definitely going to have to
talk to the costume department about my revealing outfit. “I’m sure
it will be a pleasure working with you,” he stated with a wink
before walking over to the director. I watched him walk away,
getting a distinctly creepy vibe that made me wonder how I had ever
thought he was charming and attractive. There was a big difference
between thinking an older man is attractive on TV and having him
hit on you in real life. Maybe "big difference" isn’t the right way
to put it—there’s a very creepy difference.

“You clean up nicely,” said a decidedly more
welcome voice, so close to my ear that I could feel his breath on
my neck.

“Lukas,” I replied breathlessly. It appeared
that the only way I could ever greet him was by saying his
name.

“Are you nervous for your first scene?” he
asked, his eyes roaming in the same way Will’s had, though I did
notice I didn’t mind this nearly as much.

“Very,” I admitted.

“Well, don’t worry too much. If you just do
as well as you did in the audition, you’ll be just fine,” he said
kindly, smiling down at me. I couldn’t help but feel drawn to his
smile—not because it was perfect and famous, but because it seemed
so sincere.

I could hear the warnings of Joseph, Gran,
Candice, and Benjamin in my head, but they didn’t matter to me.
They could have been wrong. Even Ryan had admitted that he didn’t
know enough about Lukas to make a fair judgment; he was just going
off of the rumors. Everyone knew tabloids would stretch the truth
to its breaking point to make a story sound better.

“Thanks,” I replied, looking (I’m sure) very
intelligent. I couldn’t help it. I was helpless in the face of such
beauty.

“All right, June, can you come and stand here
please? We’re ready for you,” Charlie Bates, the director,
said.

Suddenly feeling very naked despite my
efforts to sabotage the revealing costume, I took my place under
the glaring lights. I was positioned so that I was leaning over a
table in Imogen’s apartment a few days after the initial discovery
of the body. The table was covered in my own "research" on the
murder case, which would, of course, look very bad when Cutter and
Charles burst in with their suspicions that I may have something to
do with the murder. I was fully aware that my leaning position did
nothing to make me feel more comfortable about my tight and too-low
bodice, but I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t just put the
entire cast and crew on hold because I was feeling uncomfortable,
could I? I knew what Gran would say to that question:
Isn’t your
personal integrity worth more than avoiding a socially awkward
situation?
I closed my eyes against her imagined words and
tried to put the thoughts out of my mind, convincing myself that
this is what I had to do if I wanted to be a famous actress.

I tried to pull the bodice up when Bates had
his back turned, but the thing wouldn’t budge. It was just tied too
tight. Giving up, I prepared to resign myself to discomfort for the
sake of the craft, although one last tug proved effective enough to
bring the neckline up a few centimeters.

Once Lukas and Will were on their marks and
ready to start filming, something odd happened to my body. As the
director settled into his chair behind the camera, preparing to
start shooting, my tongue went numb and a slow, creeping sweat
began to spring up all over my body. I tried to give myself a
mental pep talk, but my whole body felt weird, as if it were
shutting down pore by pore. The air around me seemed to pulse, and
then one word brought me instantly back to reality.