Finding Love at Home (The Beiler Sisters) (9 page)

“Amen,” Ida echoed.

Verna managed a smile.

Ida stayed with Verna a few minutes longer before she stepped outside the bedroom. Joe jumped up from the couch when he saw her, but she motioned him to sit again. “You might as well get used to the fact that it’s going to be a long time. Just relax, Joe. There’s no sense in wearing yourself out.”

Joe snorted. “It’s going to take more than aspirin for me to relax.”

“Have you had supper?”

Joe appeared startled. “I guess not.”

“Well, that might help,” Ida said. “I’ll make you some.”

He didn’t object—and even looked grateful.

Ida went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. She found leftover casserole. There was enough for the three of them. Ida started the fire in the oven and found half a cherry pie in the pantry while the stove heated. A head of lettuce and a few carrots became a tossed salad of sorts. It would have to do. Bread, butter, and jam were also in the pantry. With milk for the pie, that would be supper.

Once she had everything ready, she let Joe, Sadie, and Verna know there was hot food in the kitchen.

Joe came in immediately and sat down. He prayed and then helped himself.

Ida took her place at Verna’s side while Sadie went to fix a plate for herself.

“How’s Joe doing?” Verna asked.

“He’s eating,” Ida chuckled.

“He’ll be a great
daett
.” Verna tried to smile through a contraction. “We just have to get through this part.”

“You will!” Ida squeezed Verna’s hand. “Both of you will.”

“You’re such a comfort,” Verna whispered. “Thank you for being here.”

Should she tell Verna about Minister Kanagy? The news rose up inside of her and pushed at her lips. This seemed such an inappropriate moment.
Nee
, she would focus on Verna’s needs. Her own happenings weren’t that important right now. It was best if
Mamm
were told first anyway.

“Are you sure there’s not something I can get for you?” Ida asked as she took Verna’s hand.

“Just be with me for a moment,” Verna said. “Sadie thinks things might be going faster than she expected, even if it is my first one.”

“You’re doing okay!” Ida encouraged.

Moments later Sadie came back. Ida left to fix herself a plate in the kitchen. Joe was gone, so she sat at the table and ate alone. Sadie had put the coffeepot on the stove to heat, so the aroma filled the
room. Joe must have taken her advice and gone upstairs to lie down while he could. The house stood silent. Ida’s thoughts wandered to Minister Kanagy again. If she married him, her life was about to change in radical ways. Overnight she would become the mother of eight children and the wife of a minister. Becoming a mother was a hope she’d not dared to dream since Melvin’s death. She’d let go of his children, figuring they were gone forever from her life. But apparently
Da Hah
had other plans.

“Help me do my duty,” Ida whispered into the air of the silent kitchen. “And help me love them all—including Minister Kanagy.”

She finished her meal and cleared the table. On the stove the coffeepot hissed as steam rose into the air. This was so like life, Ida thought. You lived and then you were gone, just like vapor that rose upward and vanished from the world. At least her life would have meaning and purpose.

“Thank you, dear
Hah
for this change.” Ida glanced at the ceiling. “And let Verna birth a healthy child. If it is not against Your will. Otherwise help us bear the sorrow with Your grace.”

Eight

T
hat same Sunday evening, Alvin sat bent over at the table, his head resting in his hands at his parents’ kitchen table in the
dawdy haus
. He was here to visit his
mamm
, yet he knew that wasn’t the real reason. He should be at the hymn singing, but he wasn’t. Mildred had gone there an hour ago. She’d driven her own horse and buggy. He’d watched her by peeking around his living room curtains. He’d almost gone out to help her hitch her horse to the buggy, but that wouldn’t have been right. Mildred would get more ideas in her head about their relationship than she already had. And she would have asked him why he wasn’t going.

She could see that his buggy was still here… it sat in plain sight. He would still have to answer her question eventually. But now he could do that tomorrow morning when she came to help with the chores. Hopefully by then he’d have a satisfactory answer for his strange behavior. His real concern tonight was Debbie. What would she think when he didn’t show up at the hymn singing? She had to know Crystal Meyers had been at the church service this morning. Debbie had probably even recognized her when she arrived because Crystal was sitting with Deacon Mast’s
frau
, Susie. And that was
why he’d kept his head down all day and rushed home before the noon meal.

Would Debbie think he had anything to do with Crystal’s sudden appearance? He should have driven over to see Debbie this afternoon, but he couldn’t bring himself to face her right now. And it wasn’t because he still had feelings for Crystal. He was sure he didn’t. But Crystal must still have an interest in him, otherwise why would she have come? Debbie would think he’d done something to encourage that. He hadn’t. But how was Crystal’s presence explainable? Who would believe him? Especially not after he’d admitted to Debbie just last Sunday that he’d feared she might in some ways be like Crystal. After all, Debbie
had
come from the
Englisha
world.
Yah
, he had been wrong to think that, but now with Crystal showing up, what would Debbie think? It was a horrible mess, and he was to blame for it.

Alvin stood. His
daett
, Edwin, had stirred in the living room. Alvin hadn’t wanted to sit alone with him, and his
mamm
hadn’t been up from her Sunday afternoon nap, so he’d settled in the kitchen. Now she must be out of the bedroom.

Alvin stepped through the kitchen doorway and winced. The sight of his
mamm
in her crippled condition tore at his heart. His parents weren’t that old—at least to him. Yet almost overnight his
mamm
had lost so much. Her left hand was immobile, and her speech was slurred. She couldn’t walk without the help of a walker. His
daett
was by her side now. Edwin was trying to help, but he seemed helpless as he fumbled beside her. Alvin rushed forward to take his
mamm
’s hand. “Have you had supper?” he asked. It was a stupid question, he figured, but better than nothing.

His
mamm
stared at him for a moment. “Are you visiting?”

“It’s Alvin!”
Daett
hollered near her ear. “He stayed home from the hymn singing to pay us a visit.”

“That’s
gut
,”
Mamm
mumbled. “I’m glad to see him.” A faint smile crossed
Mamm
’s face.

Alvin leaned forward to give her a hug. She didn’t respond other than to look up at him. “I love you,
Mamm
,” he said, giving her a peck on the cheek.

“We should get her something to eat,”
Daett
said, looking concerned. “There are leftovers in the refrigerator that Mildred left. I’m supposed to heat it in the oven when she gets up.”

Daett
is likely to burn the house down, Alvin thought.
Mamm
had always tended to the kitchen duties. But perhaps Mildred had drawn hidden talents out of
Daett
.

As if he could read his son’s thoughts,
Daett
said, “I had to make do for a while before Mildred came. I know how to make a fire in the oven.”

“Come then.” Alvin took
Mamm
’s hand and gently pushed the walker toward the kitchen table.

His
daett
stopped him. “
Nee
, she’ll rest more comfortably in the rocker until I get her food ready.”

Alvin shrugged. “Okay.” He helped ease
Mamm
into her rocker. She settled in with a smile on her face. “It’s
gut
you’re visiting, Alvin.”

“
Yah, Mamm
.” He stroked her arm.

Daett
was at the kitchen doorway. “If you want, there is enough for you to eat from what Mildred has in the refrigerator, Alvin. Unless you’ve had supper.”

He hadn’t, and he was hungry. Alvin nodded his thanks. He stood and followed his
daett
into the kitchen. This is strange, he thought. He’d grown up and worked with his
daett
in the fields but never in the kitchen. This was women’s work—duties men didn’t perform. Yet here they both were and at the same time.

For the first time in a long time, Alvin’s heart stirred toward his
daett
. Alvin had always been so sure he was different from his
daett
, but now he was no longer so certain. And there was still the fact his
daett
had never done what his youngest son had done. He’d never fled to the
Englisha
world like a scared rabbit rather than face his
problems. And his
daett
had never stayed home from a hymn singing because he’d seen his old girlfriend at a church service.

As his
daett
built up the fire in the stove, Alvin got the leftovers from the refrigerator. From what Mildred had left in the refrigerator, the girl knew how to cook. But then he expected that. Mildred had been raised Amish. Did Debbie know how to cook? But of course she did, he told himself at once. He must not question or doubt her.

“How was the service this morning?”
Daett
asked as Alvin handed him the food to put in the oven.

“Okay,” Alvin replied. What would
Daett
say if Alvin mentioned that an
Englisha
girl from his past had been in attendance? Alvin shivered. There would likely be words of rebuke spoken like he hadn’t heard since he was a child.

“I hope
Mamm
can go again someday.”
Daett
’s voice was wistful.

It probably wouldn’t happen, but Alvin wasn’t about to say so. “Perhaps I can stay with
Mamm
some Sunday while you go,” he offered.

Daett
seemed grateful. “
Yah
, perhaps. I haven’t been wanting to ask such a sacrifice from Mildred. She does enough for us already.”

He couldn’t stay next Sunday, Alvin thought. That was the day of his next date with Debbie—if she wasn’t upset with him. But why would she be? Debbie had been nothing but reasonable last Sunday. He must pay her a visit some evening this week and, at least, explain his erratic behavior. He couldn’t explain Crystal’s presence, but Debbie would understand.

Daett
spoke. “Mildred tells me you’re getting along well with her at the barn in the mornings. She likes helping with the chores.”

Alvin cleared his throat. “You really didn’t have to send Mildred out. I’m fine alone.”

“A man is never fine alone,”
Daett
’s voice rumbled, “You need a
frau
, Alvin. That house is mighty empty all by itself, especially with no
kinner
in it. But I suppose your
mamm
should be telling you this. She would if she could.”

Alvin stared at the floor. “I took Debbie home last Sunday night.”

Daett
glared at him. “So Mildred told me. I had hoped you’d forgotten that girl after waiting all summer.”

“Debbie was baptized the other Sunday,” Alvin said. “She’s Amish now.”

“Water only goes in so deep, Alvin. That girl was
Englisha
once, and you know how them
Englisha
live. Will you take a
frau
who leaves you at the first sign of trouble coming down the road?”

The words stung. Alvin was like his
daett
and hated to admit he had the same fears. But he wasn’t about to say so now.

“You done thought the same thing, didn’t you, Alvin? So why don’t you follow your better sense and take Mildred as your
frau
instead? She seems like a real decent woman. She’s interested in you, if I don’t miss my guess.”

“
Daett
.” Alvin tried to smile. “
Daett
, I love Debbie. And, well, Mildred and I have a bad history, and I’d like to just leave it alone.”