Finding Me (19 page)

“8:45? But church doesn’t start until 10:30.”

“That’s big church, of course, but since you’re going to be living here, don’t you want to start coming to Sunday school, too? It’s a great way to get to know everyone. Unfortunately, I’m in the class for young marrieds and you’ll be in the women’s class, so we won’t be together.” She offered this information with no indication that it had entered her mind that Kelli might be uncomfortable with any aspect of this.

“You know, I think I’ll probably just meet you there for—what did you call it? Big church?” Kelli did plan to attend tomorrow. It was another excuse to talk to her mother, but she didn’t want to listen to any more teaching or preaching than was absolutely necessary. A class full of strangers who’d probably memorized the Bible by the time they were teenagers didn’t sound even remotely tempting.

“But you really—”

“Beth, she says she’ll meet us at church, now back off.” Rand gave her a pointed look.

She shook her head. “There I go again.” She reached out to
touch Kelli’s hand. “I am so sorry. I just get so carried away sometimes when I’m trying to be helpful. I know it drives people crazy.”

Kelli squeezed her hand. “Don’t worry about a thing. I’m touched by your concern.” More than Beth knew, and for reasons she would never know. “How about if you save me a seat in church? That would be great.”

Beth’s face broke into a huge smile. “Of course I will.” She nodded. “Yes, that’s exactly what I’ll do.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow, then.” Beth and Rand made their way down the hallway, Shane following. He turned to Miss Birdyshaw. “Shall I walk you back home?”

“No thanks. I think I’ll continue on down the street. There’s a little girl who lives across the street from Beth and Rand that I’ve taken to visiting. Might as well keep moving that way.” She walked outside with the others but then turned back toward Kelli. “I finally figured it out.”

“Figured what out?”

“Who it is you look like. I knew the first time I saw you that you looked familiar, but I couldn’t figure out why. You remind me of a girl I knew from high school, that’s who it was. You don’t have any family around these parts, do you?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Thought not. It’s a striking resemblance, though. I’ll see if I can find an old picture and show it to you sometime.”

Shane had stopped walking and was clearly listening to this exchange. Hopefully this would be the last time Kelli would see him, as he was far too intuitive. Did he hang around his father’s store much?

Kelli held her breath until they all finally made their way down the sidewalk. She had no idea if one of her relatives had gone to school with Miss Birdyshaw, but this was dangerous territory.

She walked back inside and immediately picked up the box
from Opal. She brought it into the kitchen, but not before she locked and dead-bolted both the front and back door. She wasn’t going to take any chances.

Inside the box, there were a couple stacks of letters, bound by rubber bands. On top of it all was a lone envelope on which Opal had printed
READ THIS FIRST
.

Kelli opened the envelope to see a long letter in Opal’s handwriting.

Dear Kelli,

Given the fact that you have made the journey to Shoal Creek and decided to stay for a while, I can only assume that you have come across information in your father’s things that has led you to do so. Ever since the crash, I have wrestled with whether or not I should say anything to you about all this, but I didn’t want to do anything to hurt your fond memories. Apparently this decision has been taken out of my hands, because you are up to something.

I have included letters that your sweet Mimi sent to me over the past twenty years, and which I feel might help you understand why things happened the way they did. You know that I’ve always had a reputation for bluntness, saying what I think when I think it. Let me warn you, these letters are Suze’s heartfelt letters to me, and there are some things in them that you will find painful. It may be that you would prefer not to know all this, that you would rather be left with some less painful questions than the sharp edges of the truth. If you choose not to read them, I honestly believe you will be doing yourself a favor, but I also know that if I were in your situation, I would want to know everything. I am sending these to you. Choose what you will do with them.

Please know that Mimi and your father loved you very much. None of what you may learn will change that.

Yours always,
Opal

The two stacks of letters both had a yellow sticky note on top, the first with a number 1, the other with a 2. Kelli assumed this meant they were in chronological order. She picked up stack 1 and pulled out the top envelope. The return address was from Suze Larson, Shoal Creek, TN. A place that, until her parents’ accident, Kelli had never even heard of. Somewhere that, until this very second, Kelli had never known that her stepmother had resided.

Mom, you’re not going to believe it. I can barely believe it myself, but I have finally met the man I have been waiting for all my life. Oh, Mom, he’s just so amazing. He’s considerate, and thoughtful, and he tells me all the time how beautiful I am and how much I mean to him. It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before, because when he says it, I actually think that I might start to believe it. I never thought that would happen to me again.

He came into Jerry’s Place one day during lunch, and even though he’s quite a bit older than me, I just felt this instant connection—and I could tell by the way he kept watching me that he felt it, too. He started showing up every day for lunch, and it seemed like it would take forever, but he finally asked me on a date.

We drove up to Nashville and ate at one of the fanciest restaurants in town. Then we stayed out dancing until the early hours of the morning, just having a blast together. He’s exactly the kind of man I’ve dreamed of finding some day.

Next week, he has business in New York and he asked me to go with him. I managed to get the time off and I can hardly wait to spend some quality time, just the two of us, because we’re having to keep everything here on the down-low because he’s married.

Not for long, though. He’s in the process of filing for divorce. His wife doesn’t give him the time of day, and I’m telling you that kind of woman doesn’t deserve a man like him. He’s working all these long hours as a stockbroker, you’d think she’d appreciate him a little more than she does. She doesn’t even care about him anymore, she gives her attention to the kids and that’s it.

As they say, her loss is my gain. I can’t believe how happy I am.

Love,
Suze

So her father and Mimi had started their affair right here in this town while Kelli, her siblings, and her mother were all left in the dark? Or
was
Alison in the dark? Kelli found herself curious as to what her real mother did and did not know. The problem was, how was she going to find out answers and stay within her predefined boundaries?

She didn’t know the answer yet, but she was going to keep pushing until she found a way. She reread the letter, and this time she focused in on
Jerry’s Place
. She did a quick Internet search and found that it was a local diner, still open. Maybe someone there would remember something.

For now, she set the letters back in the box and slid the whole thing into the back of the bedroom closet. She didn’t think she had the emotional strength to read Mimi’s version of things all at once. Or the stomach for it.

22

J
erry’s Place looked more or less like a stereotypical small-town diner, and Kelli enjoyed the ambiance. It was mostly deserted at dinnertime, so when Kelli took a seat on a stool at the bar, the waitress immediately walked over.

She pulled a menu from the stand on the counter and handed it to Kelli. “Can I get you something to drink?”

“Iced tea, please.”

The woman nodded and was quickly back with a tall, red plastic tumbler. “You ready to order?” The waitress was young, younger than Kelli, so there was no way she would remember Mimi. Kelli really didn’t have money to be spending on frivolous dinners, so she looked for the cheapest thing on the menu. “The chicken fingers, please.”

“You got it.” She wrote something on her pad of paper, then hollered back through the opening toward the kitchen. “Got a live one.” And she hung the order on a line in the window.

The TV was on above the bar, a news story about an uprising in the Middle East. Kelli looked around the small restaurant.
There was a family at a round table to her left, and a young couple holding hands in one of the booths.

“I’m Siena, by the way. Give me a shout if you need anything and I don’t notice, like that’s going to happen. Not exactly a Saturday night hotspot, huh?” The waitress leaned on the counter across from her.

“Not exactly.” Kelli smiled toward her. “Have you lived here long?”

“All my life. How about you?”

“Just moved to town.”

“Really? Where from?”

“California.”

“What brought you to this dump?” She smiled as she said it, making Kelli think she actually had quite a bit of affection for the place.

“Long story. But a woman I knew in California used to work here, a long time ago. I’ve heard so many stories about the place, I decided I better check it out while I was in town.”

“Really? What’s her name?”

“Suze Huddleston.”

“Hey, Gramps”—she stuck her head through the order window—“do you remember a Suze Huddleston who used to work here?”

Kelli couldn’t hear the reply, but she went into panic mode. Giving Mimi’s real name made an Internet search to find her, and by association, Kelli’s father, a rather easy task. Of course, Huddleston hadn’t been Suze’s name when she was here, nor was it her father’s name when he was here.

Siena turned back toward her. “Jerry says he remembers a Suze, but he doesn’t recognize the name Huddleston.”

An older man appeared at the window and shoved a plate of chicken fingers and fries toward Siena. He had a head full of gray
hair and bright blue eyes that seemed to twinkle. “You the one asking about Suze?”

Kelli nodded.

“There was a Suze Larson that worked here, before you were born, I imagine.”

Time to come up with a cover and quick. “That’s probably her maiden name, although I couldn’t say for sure. I didn’t know her that well. But she talked about working here.”

“She was a looker, I remember that. We started getting in a lot more men in our daily lunch crowd.” He grinned and shook his head.

“A looker, really?” Kelli tried to play dumb. “She must not have aged well, because that’s not exactly how I would describe her. Kind of dumpy, I’d say.” Mimi would be rolling over in her grave if she heard that comment.

“Too bad. She was a nice enough girl, just needed to find a decent man. Seemed like she always attracted the wrong kind, if you know what I mean.”

“I know exactly what you mean.” Kelli looked down at her plate of food and realized she was no longer hungry. “Could I maybe get a box for this? I just remembered somewhere I am supposed to be.”

Kelli walked through the door to her duplex, her mind still working overtime from her visit to the diner. Had her father sat at that same bar? Or did he always sit in a booth so the two of them would have more privacy when he came in?

Knowing better than what she was about to do but needing to do it anyway, Kelli went back to the box of letters from Opal and pulled out the next one.

Great news, Mom! You know how I told you that David has all of these church-related guilt issues about our relationship? I found him the absolute BEST book, written by the pastor of a megachurch. It’s called Putting the Happy Back in Your Life. While the book has lots of good points about a lot of things, there is an entire chapter devoted to issues that make divorce acceptable. One of these issues is if the wife neglects the husband or makes him feel undesirable. Of course, that is exactly the case for David. David has been reading up on it all. I can see that he is finally coming to realize that just because he goes to church, it shouldn’t mean that he has to spend the rest of his life in a miserable and unfulfilling marriage. He is finally starting to see the light. He told me last night that he is sure that God would want him to be happy.