Finding Solace (9 page)

 
I got
Heather in the car. It was not the easiest task but I managed it. When I turned
the ignition over she asked, "Where are we going?"

 
"I'm
not sure. I was thinking I would take you home and then go up to the hospital
to check on Shawn."

 
"Sadie,
can I please go with you?"

 
"Of
course you can, girly. I was hoping I didn't have to take you home and leave
you there by yourself."

 
"It's
not that I can't be alone, Sadie. I just need to know Shawn is going to be okay.
"

 
"Did
you want to call Jason? Check on him too?"

 
"I
can't. I broke his heart. Did you see him? I did that to him. I've never seen
him like that. He looked so broken. How can I ever begin to say sorry to him?
Jason had every right to call me a bitch. I deserved to be called much worse
from him."

 
"Do you
care if I call Mike?"

 
"I
don't care. Just please don't tell him you’re with me."

 
"I
won't. I promise."

 
I
immediately pulled out my phone and dialed Mike's number. It went to voicemail,
so I sent him a text.

 
Me: I NEED
YOU TO CALL ME WHEN YOU CAN. I'M SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU GUYS

 
I hit the
send button and then turned up the radio. I didn't even pay attention to what
song was playing; I just needed noise in the background. Heather stayed silent
also. I guess we were just trying to prepare for what we were going to walk
into. The hospital parking lot was pretty bare. It must not be a busy night for
them. After we found a spot, I ran inside and Heather followed. The information
desk told us he was still in the emergency room, which has to be a good sign,
right? I mean, they didn't rush him to surgery.

 
We walked
through the halls lost, until someone helped us and guided us to the waiting
room. Dave and Bryan were the only people I recognized waiting. Heather slowed
down as she rounded the corner and just seemed to stop at the wall. She never
advanced to come closer. I wanted so bad to comfort her, but I needed some
information. I walked over and hugged them both. They proceeded to tell me
Shawn’s jaw, was in fact broken, and his upper cheek bone is fractured. No
injuries were to his neck and they are waiting on the tests for brain damage.
The doctors are positive he has a concussion. Now we just sit back, wait and
see.

 
"Have
either of you guys talked to Mike or Jason?" I tried to say Jason’s name a
little quieter for Heather’s sake.

 
"No, we
came straight over here after the ambulance left. We practically followed it.
Did you?" Dave said with so much angst on his face. He's very much a
peace, love, and harmony kind of guy. He and Bryan both came to EIU on
scholarship from Huntington Beach, California. Although Bryan isn't as much the
surfer type that Dave is, he's a softy too. Bryan didn't speak up. He just
stayed sitting back in his chair, staring at the floor.

 
"No, I
tried calling Mike, but it just went to voicemail, so I texted him to call me
when he got a chance. I still haven't heard from him."

 
It felt like
we had been waiting forever for more information. I started to notice how many
people would come through the emergency room for the smallest things. One lady
had a scraped elbow. I mean, seriously? I was just about to go find a vending
machine or the cafeteria, when the doctor came out. He told us the tests all
came back normal. Other than the concussion, he will be just fine. He explained
that his jaw is wired shut temporarily. The cheek bone will heal on its own.
The hospital would still like to monitor the concussion. So that meant he'd be
staying for at least a couple days.

 
We asked if
we could see him, but the doctor suggested we give him time to rest and heal
first.

 
So,
reluctantly, we headed out to our cars. Heather followed a safe distance
behind. It wasn't as if Dave or Bryan were giving her reason to feel blame but
she acted as if we all were shunning her. Truthfully, she was shunning herself
enough for all of us.

 
When I
reached for my door handle, I saw a shadow approaching. Colt was walking toward
us and my whole body just locked up. It felt like an eternity since I had seen
him last. He slapped the guys’ hands (some version of a hand shake they all
conjured up) then walked over and pulled Heather in an embrace I was all too
familiar with. It was one that made everything seem to be okay. She just opened
up and cried. I could see her hands move into fists, clutching Colt’s shirt, as
if she didn’t hold on tight enough that small feeling of security would vanish.
He continued to hold her while my eyes burned with tears watching the two of
them. This was all a nightmare and I was ready to wake up any minute now. Just
as I finished that thought, my phone rang. I pulled it out of my purse and saw
the screen. Immediately I hit answer.

 
"Mike?"

 
"Yeah,
little one, it’s me. Sorry it took so long to get back to you. My phone has been
blowing up."

 
"How is
Jason? Is he okay? How is his hand? He punched that cinderblock wall so
hard."

 
"Sadie,
I'm not going to lie to you. He's fucked up. I'm not even talking about his
hand when I say that. Jason has never fallen as hard as he did for Heather. I
didn't even know this, but he bought an engagement ring already. I just found
him in his room a little while ago holding the box. Part of me blames the
fucker for moving so fast, but I can't really judge him. I've never been in
love like that before."

 
"
Mike, that
hurts so much to hear. I love you guys like
brothers but I have to tell you this. Heather loves him too. I don't understand
what happened that night with her and Shawn but I know she would never do
anything to risk losing Jason. The more I think about it, the more confused I
get. She doesn't even remember how she and Shawn ended up in that bed together
and Shawn tonight acted like we were all crazy for being upset about it. We
both know Shawn. He's not going to scream in the middle of a bar about sleeping
with one of his friend’s girlfriends?"

 
"Wait,
are you saying that they may not have even fucked around?"

 
"I
think that's exactly what I'm saying."

CHAPTER
12

 
As
I had the revelation, I turned to look back at Heather. She must have been
listening to the conversation because she let go of Colt and ran toward me.

 
"Oh my God,
Sadie, you’re right! I remembered some bitch spilling her beer on me. I went
into the bathroom trying to rinse it out but then it was soaking wet. I found
the only bedroom that was not being used as a fuck pad. I thought I could wait
out the time it took to dry. I must have passed out while I was waiting. Don't
get me wrong. I remembered all of this before. I've played that night over and
over again in my head. I just didn't understand how Shawn got there. I thought
something must have happened and I blacked it out. He didn't have on any
clothes, Sadie."

 
"Yes,
he did. It wasn't much, but he still had his boxers on. When you guys ran out
of the house, I stayed long enough for Shawn to get out of bed. And believe me,
if I saw his junk, I would remember it," Colt added.

 
"And
like I said, if he was fucking around with his friend’s girlfriend, he wouldn't
announce it to a bar full of people that would let it get back to Jason. Holy
shit, guys!"

 
"It was
all for nothing," Dave said with disgust.

 
I looked
down and realized I was still holding my phone in my hand. Immediately, I put
it up to my ear.

 
"Mike,
are you still there?"

 
"Yeah,
and I heard every word. This is unbelievable! What the fuck do we do now?"

 
"Maybe
I should bring Heather over to talk to Jason." Heather and Mike responded
simultaneously, "No."

 
"Okay,
so it was a bad idea. Forgive me, you two."

 
"Sadie,
let me talk to Jason. I can explain everything I heard. Let him process all of
this, okay?"

 
"Sounds
like a plan, and Mike? Thank you for being you."

 
"No
problem, Sadie. Love
ya
and I will talk to you
later.”

 
"Love
ya
too, bye"

 
I put the
phone back in my purse and set it on the seat in my car. I could overhear Bryan
asking Colt why he was not there tonight. That was an answer I would also like
to know. Dave chimed in before Colt got caught avoiding the question.

 
"You
were with Shelly, weren't you? You lucky bastard, I've been trying to get a
piece of that for weeks. One smile from you tonight and you nail her. You
suck!"

 
I lost my
stomach. Should I turn around? Probably not, but guess what, I did. That action
alone gave me the pleasure to see Colt staring right at me. His face could not
have been any easier to read, and guilt was written all over it. I smiled at
him. It was all I could think to do. He placed me in a friend’s zone, remember?
I hated that I had to know what he was doing, but it kept me in check. I was
not going to fall for someone who was not mine to begin with. Heather was still
reeling in the information we had all put together. I was ready to leave.

 
"Are
you ready to get out of here, Heather, it has been a long night for all of us
and I'm ready for it to end?"

 
Colt looked
at me like he wanted to say something but he just looked down instead. We said
our goodbyes then got in the car and drove away. I couldn't wait to go to bed
and pretend all of this was a dream. For Heather, it was still going to be a
nightmare. She still needed to deal with Jason.

 
When I woke
up I cracked my eye open at the clock. It wasn't even seven a.m., so I rolled
over and attempted to fall back asleep. After about twenty minutes of tossing
and turning, I gave up. I got out of bed and was walking to the bathroom when I
heard a man's voice. I wanted to go downstairs to see who it was, but felt I
needed to give Heather space. Living with someone meant you were always limited
on alone time. So I brushed my teeth and headed into the shower. As I was
washing my hair I remembered the last time I heard a guy’s voice downstairs.
Yuck! Geoff is one gross douche bag. I rinsed the conditioner out of my hair
and turned off the water. While wrapping the towel around my head, I heard the
front door open and then close. I guess whoever he was left. I applied my
lotion and as I grabbed the towel to cover myself, I realized how happy I was
that whoever was here had gone. I didn't bring any clothes with me, so I flung
the towel around my body and walked out. I ran into my room and closed the
door. I turned around and screamed my head off. Colt was sitting on my bed!
What the hell is he doing here?

 
"What
the hell are you doing here?” came out of my mouth simultaneously with the
thought.

 
"Should
I leave because even if I have to, it was worth it to see you in that towel?"

 
"Funny,
Colt. Really, what are you doing in my room at seven thirty in the
morning?"

 
"Well,
I wasn't planning on it being grand central station at your house. I was hoping
to talk to you before you went to work."

 
"Colt,
do you know anything about me? My schedule hasn't changed one bit since we met.
I don't work on Tuesday.
At all, ever."

 
"Well
thanks for blowing my cover story. I just wanted to talk, okay?"

 
"At
seven thirty in the morning?" I knew I was snapping at him and shouldn't
be. I was still reacting from what I heard last night and I needed to stop.

 
"Sadie,
I'm sorry. I couldn't sleep last night after seeing you. When you and Heather
left, Dave and Bryan came back to my place. There was no point for me to go in
to see Shawn if they weren’t letting anybody. So I asked if they wanted to go
have a beer. They filled me in on what happened and I feel awful that I wasn't
there for you."

 
There for
me? What was he talking about? And let’s go back four conversations ago and
address the grand central station comment.

 
"What
did you mean about grand central station?"

 
"Wow,
way to deflect that one! What I meant was
,
I thought
you and Heather would still be asleep. I didn't expect Jason to be here this
early."