Flash Point (Kilgore Fire Book 2) (6 page)

My shoulders slumped, knowing where this was going before any words even left his mouth.

“Okay,” I replied, resigned.

He let me go with one last kiss to the back of my head, and I turned to see him walking unhurriedly back to the middle of the room.

He sat on the bar stool that was next to the bar that spanned one side of the room.

A place where we’d played chess. Monopoly. Drank and ate.

Among other things,
I thought.

“I remember everything you said last night,” he informed me.

I bit my lip and pressed my back closer to the door, praying that it’d swallow me whole.

It didn’t.

“What’s that?” I decided to play dumb.

He narrowed his eyes.

“Okay, I know what you’re referring to, but I’m not sure what there really is left to say about it,” I amended.

He crossed his arms over his chest, making the muscles on his chest bunch and jump with the movement.

My eyes zeroed in on the tattoo that I’d seen the night before at the hospital, the one I’d prudently ignored.

Now, though, in the light of the morning, there was no denying it.

That was
our
tattoo.

I had the same one on my back.

When we were front to back earlier, they’d most likely been touching…
as they were intended to
.

His was the mouth of a cougar, strong and fierce, teeth gleaming against his sun kissed skin.

When they were touching? Well then mine looked like my flesh was being pierced by those teeth inked to his skin. Looked so real that you could swear it was the real thing.

It was stupid…something we both did when we were young. But there was no denying that we had the tattoo, and when we were in the same room, everyone would know what they meant.

He led right into what was bothering him, not pulling any punches.

“What hurts the most, is watching you walk away. We had everything. Love. Time. Our whole motherfuckin’ lives in front of us, and you threw it away in a fit of anger over something that I
had no control over!
” He finished with a roar. “You fucking gutted me. Pulled my heart out from thousands of miles away and stomped on it. Only minutes before I had to go on patrol,” he pointed his finger at me accusingly. “Who does that?”

I was crying.

I didn’t mean it!
I wanted to say.

But I
had
meant it. At the time.

I’d known minutes after doing it that I’d screwed up.

I’d tried to call him back, but I’d known the instant I’d pressed *69 that it wasn’t going to work like I wanted it to.

He’d called me back after getting my message to call him. He’d called from the community phone. It was routed through so many people and places that I knew it was fruitless.

I’d written him letters.

I’d sent him emails.

I’d called. And left messages.

Over and over again.

Hell, I still sent him letters.

I’d tried to move on.

But after trying to do it for years, I knew, just like I had known with Bowe, that it was pointless.

Sometimes I put on an act…one that made me seen like I was more ‘okay’ than I really was.

I had nothing to say. Nothing at all.

‘I’m sorry’ didn’t even seem good enough.

But I tried any way.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered brokenly.

He laughed humorlessly. “You’re sorry?”

I closed my eyes.

“If you were sorry, you would’ve not said those words in the first place,” he said through clenched teeth. “Then I come home, and you’re right back in my heart. In my fucking space. And you lay that shit on me last night and don’t even have the nerve to stay? That’s just fuckin’ typical of you, Masen. You say what you have to say and never face the consequences of your words and actions.”

I shook my head, trying to clear my brain.

“I’m sorry,” I said again.

“Look at me,” he said through clenched teeth. “I want you to stay away from me. If I’m somewhere, you leave.”

I nodded. I could do that.

“Okay,” I said.

“And don’t be mean to Emily,” he said.

“Emily?” I said, hoping he wasn’t meaning who I thought he was.

“You saw her the other day at the fire station,” he said.

His wife.

Don’t be mean to his wife.

“I would never be mean to her,” I said softly. Dejectedly.

He shrugged. “Gotta cover all my bases since I won’t be seeing you again.”

Those words felt like a punch to the gut.

“Okay,” I said, nodding.

“You can go.”

I left. But my heart, as well as my pride, was left on the tile floor right inside the entrance to his parents’ home.

Falls out, balls out. (Footballs, you pervs!)

-Coffee Cup

Masen

One month later

“You look so cute pregnant,” I said softly, looking at my best friend’s belly.

Mia smiled. “One day you’ll be pregnant, and then I’ll say the same thing to you.”

I ignored that comment.

Maybe I would…but most likely I wouldn’t.

It didn’t work that way if I never found someone to have sex with me.

I’d been in a sexual rut for eight and a half long years, and it didn’t help that I found fault in nearly every man that showed interest in me.

Bowe, for example.

He was a great guy.

Kind, loving…sexy.

But he just wasn’t Booth.

And I’d had to sit him down yesterday and explain things.

He’d understood and now we were officially just friends.

A friendship that I was beginning to depend on almost as much as mine with Mia.

“Alright, so from what I understand, you do not want to know. You want me to hand over the verdict to this young lady right here so she can throw you a party,” the young woman asked.

She was cute.

I’d also heard that she belonged to one of the SWAT team.

“That’s right,” Mia confirmed.

Tai’s hand tightened visibly.

“Are you sure?” He asked with the cutest whine in his voice that I’d ever heard.

She smacked his hand. “Yes, Tai. I’m sure.”

Thirty minutes I sat in my car and ripped open the envelope, excited to see what the verdict was.

And I smiled.

A girl.

“
Eeeek!
” I squealed in excitement.

Excitement that was crushed with a battering ram when I looked up to find Booth in front of me.

With his wife by his side, and his child in his arms.

I instantly stilled, watching the trio like one would a predator.

The wife didn’t see me, but Booth did.

And it hurt. Oh God, did it hurt to see him holding that baby.

A baby that should’ve been ours, not theirs.

I closed my eyes as pain stabbed me in the heart.

I started the car without opening my eyes, dropped the envelope onto the seat beside me, then opened my eyes, immediately turning, so I could back out of my parking spot.

Which then only afforded me a view of Booth strapping his child into a car seat.

I started to pant through the pain.

Biting my lip until I tasted blood, I backed out of the parking lot and slowly made my way back to work.

I’d spent my hour before work in the doctor’s office with Mia, and now I was headed to work.

Well, I was going to be late. Seemed like a good cry was in my future.

Two days later

I was walking out to my car, not paying attention at all, when I ran into a brick wall.

Well, a man that resembled a brick wall.

“Ooomph,” I said, bracing my hands on said brick wall.

“Sorry darlin,” a man said.

I looked up and smiled at Drew.

“It’s okay,” I said. “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

He patted my shoulder and let me go, and it was then that I saw Booth.

He was glaring at me…well, where Drew’s hands had been on me.

I looked away and scooted past them, trying hard not to look behind me.

My eyes were already welling with tears.

Wasn’t this supposed to get easier?

Five days later

I had my foot on the gas, holding it down lightly so my Jeep was at a constant rev.

I was on my way to my parents’ house for dinner, and I was running late.

I didn’t have time for my Jeep to break down…nor the money.

My student loan payment was due tomorrow, and I had exactly enough in my bank account to cover my groceries and a tank of gas for the week. Not enough to pay for any towing bills, let alone what it would cost to fix whatever was wrong with it now.

I was what one would call ‘irresponsible’ with my money.

If I saw something I liked, I bought it.

Which was why I had a brand new pair of cowboy boots sitting in their box in the back seat. I had a new purse that cost around two hundred dollars, and also, I had gone out to eat five times this week.

“No, Mom. I’m almost there. I had to stop and put air in my tires, and then got sidetracked with someone at the gas station that was selling banana bread,” I said to my mom.

“Okay, well just don’t take too much longer. You know how daddy likes to have his dinner right at six,” my mother explained.

I knew what my father liked.

He was a man of schedules. He did everything exactly when it was supposed to be done.

If he had to take a shit at four, and he’d scheduled it in at five, then he’d wait the requisite hour until he could shit on his schedule.

Well, he might not be quite that bad, but the man was trying, I could tell you that.

He’d always been that way.

Jim Albert Crisfield was fifty-nine years old, and according to my Mimi, he’s been that way since he was old enough to walk.

No matter his shortcomings, I still loved the hell out of him.

Even if, after time, he annoyed the shit out of me!

“I know, mom. I’ll be there in just a few,” I said, turning my head to look out my window when I stopped at the stop light that would be the last one before the turn to my parents’ house.

I quickly turned away when I saw Booth there on his motorcycle.

The same motorcycle that he’d taken me for my first ride on…the same one that we’d made out on for countless amounts of hours.

The same one that his wife now rode on.

I guess I should be happy that she wasn’t on it with him, or I might’ve been crying when I got to my parents.

I slammed my hand down on the steering wheel, pissed off that he had that kind of effect on me.

He didn’t even look over at me, even though I knew he was aware of me.

It was hard to miss the ratty yellow jeep that sounded like the muffler was about to fall off.

The light turned green and I pressed the gas pedal down as I let off of the clutch, and promptly died.

Did I mention that I still got nervous driving a standard, even after driving one all these years?

Yeah, I was pretty sure life couldn’t get any worse right now.

Then I tried to start the Jeep back up and got nothing.

It didn’t even turn over.

It just clicked.

“Fuck!” I yelled.

People behind me honked at me.

The motorcycle carrying Booth had taken off as soon as the light hard turned green.

At least there was one thing going for me.

I got out after I flipped on my emergency blinkers and wondered how I was going to play this.

“You need some help?” A young man asked from behind me.

He had to be high school age, because he still had that ‘new driver’ look about him.

“Yes, please. I guess I need to push it over to the…” I stopped when the roar of the motorcycle came back to me, and I closed my eyes as I realized I was going to have to see him.

Talk to him.

The motorcycle pulled up onto the concrete median between the two roads, and I grudgingly looked over at the man that was hell bent on making sure my heart never healed.

“What’s wrong with it?” He asked without any pleasantries.

“It won’t start,” I responded dumbly.

He gave me a ‘I know that’ look and walked to the Jeep, dropping down inside of it without another word.

He shoved the seat back all the way, and I winced when I thought about how I was going to get the Jeep seat back into its original position. The seat didn’t like to be moved.

At all.

“Battery is dead,” he said.

I gritted my teeth.

I knew that.

“I know,” I said once I had some control over my mouth.

“Gonna have to pop the clutch,” he said. “Hey man, will you give me a push down the hill?” He asked the teenager.

The teenager nodded, and he and I got behind the Jeep and started to push. The teenager more so than me.

My feet started to hurt, so I kicked out of my flip flops and stepped onto the wet pavement, digging my toes into the gravel beneath my feet and pushed.

The Jeep started to roll, and with practiced ease, Booth let it get some momentum before he popped the clutch and started the Jeep right up.

“Thank God,” I said softly, turning to the teenager. “Thank you for the help.”

He grinned at me, showing me a full set of white, straight teeth that probably cost his parents a pretty penny.

“No problem,” he said, looking me up and down. “It was no hardship to help a pretty lady.”

I grinned and patted him on the shoulder before walking back towards my flip flops.

It was only then that I saw I’d cut my foot on something.

“Shit,” I said slipping my feet back into my shoes and grimacing at the raw feeling that the pressure of the shoe put on my foot.

My Jeep sat idling at the edge of the road right past my turn, and Booth started walking to me.

“You need to fix your alternator,” he said by way of greeting.

I gave him a thumb’s up. “Thanks,” I said as I passed him.

“And you’re going to need to get the spark plugs fixed…and you have an exhaust leak,” he said to my back.

I gave him another thumbs up.

“You’re not going to do anything about it, are you?” He called.

I shrugged and kept walking.

Probably not.