Flesh of the Zombie (7 page)

Luke winced
as he was lowered from the crimson sky on the end of a string of knotted bandages. He tried not to look down, but the view above didn’t help much either. The top of the makeshift rope simply disappeared into the churning purple clouds.

“I’m almost there,” he called. Unseen in the hole above, Resus was slowly feeding out the rope, controlling his friend’s descent.

Finally Luke’s feet met the blackened earth below and he allowed himself to breathe. He turned to Tee as the rope was whisked back up into the air once again. “Where’s Cleo?”

“Over here,” shouted the mummy from behind a nearby dead tree. “And I’m not coming out until I get my bandages back.”

Resus landed beside Luke and tugged at the rope, which detached itself from the tunnel above and fell to the ground. “Simple slip-knot,” beamed the vampire as he tossed the bundle of bandages behind Cleo’s tree.

Luke surveyed the landscape around them. A desert of rough black sand spread out for miles in every direction beneath the blood-red sky. The air felt as though a thunderstorm was approaching.

“Well,” said Resus,
“this
is pleasant.”

Luke spun to face him. “You didn’t have to come with me.”

“Oh, yes, I did,” replied the vampire. “You’d still be stuck up in the clouds without my help.”

“Actually,” interrupted Tee, “it was Cleo who got us down …”

“You can keep quiet, zombie boy,” snapped
Resus. “I don’t even know why you’re here.”

“He’s here because
I
want him to be here,” barked Cleo as she appeared from behind the tree, fully dressed.

“And of course we have to do what the mummy says, don’t we,” Luke grunted.

“I’ve had just about enough—”

Resus raised his hands. “Stop!” he shouted. “This isn’t really us arguing.”

“Sounds like it to me,” retorted Luke.

Resus shook his head. “It’s this place. It’s sapping our positive energy and aggravating us. We have to try to ignore it.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” grumbled Cleo, brushing black sand from her legs. “‘This place’ isn’t getting inside your bandages.” She turned and tripped over something sticking up from the ground, and glared down at it.

“Ouch! That wasn’t funny,” said the object, causing Cleo to jump in fright. Jutting out of the sand was the head of Brain Drain’s drummer, Twonk.

Luke and Resus
exchanged a glance, then dropped to their knees and began to drag sand away from the drummer. “How did you manage to get buried like this?” asked the vampire.

“It’s a funny thing,” said Twonk. “One minute I was jumping off the stage, and the next I was falling through those purple clowns!”

“Do you mean purple
clouds?”
asked Luke.

“Oh, yeah!” grinned the zombie.

Eventually Twonk’s shoulders became visible. “Right,” said Resus, “we’re going to try to pull you out now. How well are your arms stitched on?”

“They’re my originals,” said Twonk proudly. “Never been detached.”

“Let’s just hope they stay that way,” said Resus. “On three: one … two … three!” The boys heaved, and after a moment the drummer popped out of the ground.

“That’s great,” beamed Twonk, clambering to his feet. “I could have been stuck there for centurions!”

“I think you mean
centuries,”
said Luke.

“Oh, yeah!”

“… but the funny thing was, I’d already lost my drumstinks!” giggled Twonk as he finished his twenty-fifth unfunny story in a row.

“Drum
sticks
,” growled Luke. “They’re called drum
sticks
!”

“Oh, yeah!”

“My feet ache,” moaned Tee.

“So do my ears,” grumbled Resus, glancing at Twonk. “I don’t think he’s taken a breath since we found him.” The group had been walking for hours but had seen nothing but the same barren landscape, dotted with dead trees. There had certainly been no sign of any other members of Brain Drain.

“A funny thing about breath,” began Twonk.

“I think we’ll have to spend the night here,” Luke interrupted before the zombie drummer could finish.

“Spend the night?” demanded Resus. “No one said anything about spending the night! My mum and dad will be expecting me home.”

“I think they’ll have enough to worry about, what with the zombie riot and all,” said Luke. “I don’t want to stay here any longer than we have to either!”

Resus glared at him. “You’re only grumpy because of all the negative energy flying around.”

“If you don’t stop going on about negative energy …”

“It’s a funny thing,” began Twonk.

“SHUT UP!” shouted Luke and Resus together.

“The problem is, we don’t know where the next member of Brain Drain will be,” said Cleo. “We need to cover more ground.”

“And how do you suggest we do that, brainy-bandages?” asked Resus.

“Simple,” said Cleo, sticking her tongue out at him. “We ride.” The mummy headed towards a gap in the trees, where she had spied a glowing silver unicorn. Its long spiral horn glittered in the red light of the sky as it stood watching them.

“Cleo, stop right there,” said Resus.

“What’s the matter?” asked the mummy. “It’s just a unicorn.”

“A unicorn in the Underlands!” Resus reminded her. “Creatures are only sent here because they’re nasty.
Really
nasty!”

“Nonsense,” scoffed Cleo, creeping up to the silver beast and running a hand over its shimmering
coat. “You’re just trying to spoil things again. How can something this beautiful be nasty?”

“Is it me,” said Resus to Luke, “or can you feel the phrase ‘I told you so’ heading towards us …?”

“Resus might be right,” said Luke. “Better to leave it alone.”

“You really are a pair of cowards,” mocked Cleo. She reached up to stroke the unicorn on its nose. The animal blew twinkling air from its nostrils and lowered its head so that Cleo could pull herself up onto its back.

“See,” said the mummy, “no problem at all!”

“Be careful …”

“Leave her to it,” grumbled Luke, turning away. “If she gets hurt, it’s her own fault.”

“I can’t leave her to it,” snapped Resus. “That’s a horse with a built-in weapon!”

“You mean this silly thing?” asked Cleo, reaching forward to caress the unicorn’s horn. “This is just for show, isn’t it, boy?”

The unicorn blew another blast of air from its nose, but this time its breath glittered black. Then, the creature’s eyes melted from silver to red, and with a deafening whinny it tossed Cleo
high into the air. The beast raised itself up on its back legs and impaled the falling mummy on its pointed horn. Cleo screamed in agony.

“Told you so!” yelled Luke and Resus together as the unicorn took off at a gallop. The three boys and Twonk gave chase across the dead, blackened plain.

“It went through her stomach,” shouted Tee. “She can’t survive that!”

“She’s a mummy,” yelled Resus. “Her stomach’s in the fridge at home, along with all her
other organs. She’ll hurt after this, but she’ll live.”

“If
we can catch her,” bellowed Luke. “The unicorn’s a lot faster than us!”

“I’ve got an idea,” said Resus, dragging a length of rope from his cloak and tying a slip-knot in the end as they ran. “But we’re only going to get one shot at this,” he warned.

Spinning the rope around his head like a cowboy, Resus tossed the noose towards the retreating beast. It fell against the unicorn’s horn and dropped away.

“I missed!” he shouted in frustration.

“Not necessarily,” called Tee as the rope slid backwards over the creature’s tail. He took the end from Resus’s hand and yanked hard. The slip-knot tightened around the thick hair and the unicorn skidded to a halt.

“There,” beamed Tee. “That’ll be a tale to tell everyone back—”

His breath was knocked from him as the unicorn galloped away again, eyes blazing and foam dripping from its mouth.

Tee was dragged roughly over the sand. His palms burned as the rope threatened to slip though
them, and he twisted the thick cord around his wrists to get a better grip.

Resus, Luke and Twonk threw themselves at Tee’s feet, grabbing his ankles to add their weight. Eventually the unicorn was dragged to a stop, shaking its head angrily. This dislodged Cleo from its horn, and the mummy landed with a crash among a clump of dead bushes.

The boys released the rope and raced over to Cleo as the unicorn galloped off into the distance. She opened her eyes and stared up at them. “That
really
hurt,” she groaned.

“I’m not surprised,” said Twonk. “You were imposed on its horn!”

“Impaled,”
snapped Luke, correcting him.

“Oh, yeah!”

“I warned you to stay away from that thing,” yelled Resus, hugging Cleo. “Anything could have happened!”

She forced a smile. “I wasn’t worried,” she said. “I had you to save me.”

“Actually,” said Luke, “that one was down to Tee.”

“You did well,” admitted Resus, patting the beaming zombie on the shoulder. “Why don’t
you and Twonk go and find us some firewood? It looks like we’ll be spending the night here after all.”

As Tee and Twonk lumbered off in search of kindling, Resus turned to Luke with a grin. “If nothing else, it’ll be quiet for a while.”

Just then, a tortured scream rang out and the trio turned to see Brain Drain’s guitarist, Jazpants, racing across the plain towards them, her hands beating at herself frantically.

“Me and my big mouth,” sighed the vampire.