For Better or Worse (8 page)

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Authors: Jennifer Johnson

BOOK: For Better or Worse
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Kelly leaned back in the passenger seat. She enjoyed the dancing of the city’s lights as Harold drove out of Wilmington and toward their hometown. The hotel dinner had been absolutely marvelous. The waiter was wonderful, the ambiance stunning. It had been a treat she’d remember forever. She peeked at her fiancé who silently studied the road.
God, You have been too good to me
.

Her cell phone vibrated in her purse. She glanced at the clock. Sadie would have dropped the younger girls off at the house around a half hour before. Kelly was surprised she hadn’t received a phone call with them fussing before this. She pushed the talk button.

“Mom, Candy won’t let me watch my show. She had the TV last. Now it’s my turn,” Brittany squealed.

Kelly sighed. No “Hi, Mom. How was your date?” Just instant fighting. She could hear Candy’s voice in the background. “Mom, it’s that law show. I hate that show. It scares me.”

“You watch it all the time in Mom’s room. You just don’t want to watch it right now,” Brittany retorted.

“Brittany.” Kelly tried to get her middle daughter’s attention. “Brittany.” She tried a little louder.

Harold looked at her and grinned. Kelly rolled her eyes. “Brittany.”

“Mom, tell her,” Brittany squealed.

“Brittany, I’m not going to let either of you watch TV if you don’t listen. Let me talk to Candy.”

“Mom wants to talk to you.” Brittany’s voice sounded muffled, but Kelly could still make out the mocking in her tone.

“Mom,” Candy whined into the phone.

“Listen, you can go in my room and watch TV.”

“I don’t want to sit in that old, stuffy wingback chair,” Candy whined.

“Just cuddle up in my covers.” Kelly brushed a hair from her face. “I’ll be home in just a bit.”

“Really.” Excitement sounded in Candy’s voice. “I get to get in Mommy’s bed.” Candy’s voice singsonged at Brittany, then the phone clicked off.

No good-byes. No “Did you have fun, Mom?” Just squabbles. It was the story of her life.

Harold laughed, and Kelly scowled at him. “Just you wait, Mr. Smith. You get to listen to this all the time, too, in just a few weeks.”

“I’ll be hiding out in my man room.”

Kelly chuckled at the room in her house that Harold had started to fix up as his man room. He hadn’t brought his leather recliner and TV over because he hadn’t moved out of his house yet, but she knew they would be finding a home in her house only a few days, or maybe hours, after they returned from their honeymoon.

As she put her cell phone away, she remembered Zoey’s. “Don’t forget we have to take this to Zoey.” She pulled out her daughter’s phone and accidentally pushed the middle button turning it on. Curiosity crept through Kelly as she noticed her daughter had a new text message. It was from a boy, but Kelly didn’t recognize the name.

“Would it be bad to check your daughter’s text messages?” She looked at Harold sheepishly.

“I don’t think so.”

“I was just being silly asking. Of course I’ll check her messages. It’s my job as her mom to make sure she stays safe.”

Kelly opened the text and read it. Her mouth fell open and her blood seemed to stop flowing. “Oh no.”

“What?”

Kelly could hear the worry in Harold’s tone, but she couldn’t look at him. Her eyes couldn’t seem to leave the phone’s screen. “Oh no.”

“What is it, Kelly?” Harold tried to reach for the phone, but Kelly held it tight.

“Get me to that fast-food joint. We’ve got to get there fast.”

She looked at the time again. According to the message, Harold had about fifteen minutes to get to the hamburger place before Zoey left.

“What is it?” Harold’s voice pleaded again.

Kelly looked at her fiancé. Worry etched his expression, and she hated that this wonderful man was being dragged through all the difficulties she was having trying to raise her children. “Tell me, Kelly.”

She tried to hold her tears back. Harold hadn’t had the blessing of holding the girls as babies, of getting slobbery kisses on the cheek, of seeing them reach huge milestones like using the potty and reciting the ABC’s. Instead he met her when they’re at the stage of arguing, complaining, being selfish, and making poor choices.
God, how can I do this to him? Sure, there are rewards with the girls at this stage of life, but it seems to be more about saying no, explaining why I say no, and ending sibling fights
.

“This isn’t fair to you, Harold. I’m like walking chaos.” She turned her body toward him and placed her hand on her chest. “And I don’t like drama. I’ve never liked drama, but now I live with drama every day. Some days I think I’ve gone cuckoo from the overwhelming surge of girl-drama that happens throughout the course of one of my days.”

Her humor fell flat as she inwardly acknowledged her selfishness at being willing to involve Harold in her life. Dating him had been wonderful, but the closer they got to marriage, the more she realized she was asking too much of him.

She thought of the Christian counseling sessions they’d had. At their small community church, the pastor required six sessions of counseling for all engaged couples before he’d wed them before God and family. Her and Harold’s sessions had been especially sweet to her because she had been able to hear how Harold felt about taking on a ready-made family of all girls.

“I
don’t know a lot about women
.” Harold’s words just a few weeks ago filled Kelly’s mind.
“But I know I love this woman
.” He’d pointed to Kelly. “
And all the Coyle women
.” His smile and quick wink had warmed her heart.
“I don’t know what it’s like to be a biological father, but when I see one of Kelly’s girls get hurt, I know I want to help them. When I see them smile over something they’re proud of, I feel prouder. When I see a boy looking at them inappropriately, I want to punch him in the face
.”

The last statement brought a smile to her face even now.
In the last year, he had proven his love for them. But now with Zoey …
Her thought broke and she closed her eyes. What was her oldest child thinking?
God, what will it take to bring her back to a right standing with You? How can I help her
?

She’d tried everything every Christian counselor had ever suggested. The girl simply refused to allow herself to heal from her father’s death. She wanted to blame God. And the child was old enough—seventeen and a senior in high school—that all Kelly could do was watch the girl’s emotional upheaval.

But this I can do something about
. Kelly gripped Zoey’s cell phone tighter.

“Kelly, tell me what’s going on.” Harold’s voice broke her thoughts.

“She’s meeting a guy after work.”

Harold nodded. “Okay. That’s not so bad.”

“No.” Kelly shook her head. “The boy’s intentions for that meeting are written in the text. And she told me she was getting off at eleven, but she’s supposed to meet him at nine thirty.”

Anger etched on Harold’s features as his foot pressed more firmly against the gas pedal. By all accounts, he looked like a father on a mission to save his little girl. The picture warmed Kelly’s heart but saddened her, as well. She knew Harold loved the girls, even though Zoey especially was at her most difficult. His life had been much simpler before Kelly came along.

The guilt of it weighed her, and then she thought of the confrontation she and Zoey would no doubt have in just a matter of minutes. She felt older. Tired.

She didn’t feel like a two-week-away bride. Nor like a woman who had just spent a romantic dinner at one of the nicest places she’d ever been to.

She felt like an old, weary woman, who was in for yet another “battle of her life.”
God, I feel like I’m losing
.

six

It had been an uphill battle getting to this day, but they’d made it. Harold looked at the calendar on his cell phone. December 28. His wedding day. Battle or no battle, Kelly Coyle—soon-to-be Smith—was worth it.

Harold buttoned the last button on his white vest. The thing had some kind of pattern on it. He thought the woman had called it paisley. It made him nervous that Kelly hadn’t gone with him to pick it out. He wanted this wedding to be all that Kelly dreamed. At least Cam had gone with him. Kelly’s brother knew more about clothes than Harold did.

“You don’t look half bad.” His friend, Rudy, walked into the Sunday school room turned men’s dressing room. Walt followed behind Rudy.

Harold grinned at his friends. The two had surprised him by attending the church’s Christmas service. Walt had even brought his wife and children. They hadn’t talked much about it since, but Harold knew it was a start. And he clung to God’s promise that His Word never comes back void. No matter what, he’d continue to pray for his friends.

Rudy patted his round belly. “I think I look ten pounds thinner.”

Normally, the pair reminded Harold of the villains from the movie
Home Alone
. Seeing them decked out in black tuxes made Harold smile. “I’d say that you two don’t look too shabby.”

“Maggie thinks I’m hot.” Walt straightened his shoulders then wiggled his eyebrows.

Harold and Rudy burst out in laughter. Harold nudged the taller man’s shoulder. “It’s good your wife thinks you look good.”

Cam walked into the room. He clasped his hands together. “Are you ready for this, big brother?”

Harold felt excitement race through his veins. “Ready to be your big brother? You bet.”

Kelly looked at her daughters. The girls’ green dresses fit beautifully and complemented the frame and personality of each one. Candy’s deep green silk taffeta dress hinted at the eleven-year-old’s budding shape but still allowed her to look like a girl. Brittany’s knee-length silk spaghetti-strap dress accented her long, slender features in beauty and innocence. And Zoey—as much as Kelly didn’t like the darker hair color, she couldn’t help but admit the mixture of dark hair, light skin, and emerald green made the teenager look stunningly beautiful. The dress they’d chosen for Zoey was fashionable, but still hid the curves of her oldest daughter.

Kelly shook her head.
It was only a few years ago that I didn’t have to worry about their clothes revealing too much
. Her mind drifted to the night two weeks before when she and Harold had stopped Zoey from meeting a boy at his house. Kelly purposefully shook the thought away. Today was her wedding day. She wanted to focus on Harold, and the life they’d share together.

“I have a present for each of you.” Kelly pulled three small boxes from her bag.

Candy clapped. “Oh, I can’t wait. I love presents.”

Brittany moved closer, eyeing the boxes, but Zoey stayed across the room from them. Kelly knew she wasn’t thrilled with the wedding, but her oldest had been moping since Christmas Eve, and Kelly wished she’d snap out of it, just for today at least.

“Each of you is wearing a beautiful dress, individual, as if made especially for you.” Kelly smiled at her girls. She and Tim had made beautiful children, and each of them held such wonderful, unique qualities to place at God’s feet for service. “But I wanted you to have one thing that’s the same. I hope you like them.”

She handed boxes to Candy and Brittany, then walked over to Zoey and handed the last one to her. At the same time, the girls opened their gifts. Kelly watched as Brittany allowed the slight gold chain to drape her fingertips. The small diamond pendant hung from the chain.

“It’s so dainty,” Brittany said.

“So pretty,” Candy added.

“I’m afraid I’ll break it.” Brittany said. “You know how I am.”

Kelly laughed. Yes, she knew her middle daughter. The girl would lose her head if it were not attached to her body, and she was just as fortunate her feet were attached as often as she tripped over them. “You’ll be fine. Here, let me put it on you.”

Amidst thank-yous from her younger girls, Kelly put the necklaces around Brittany’s and then Candy’s neck. She walked toward Zoey to help her with the necklace, but her oldest already had the necklace on. Kelly gazed at her daughters. They were so big, so grown up. The years had gone by too fast. After inhaling a deep breath, she glanced down at the sweatshirt and T-shirt and jeans she still wore. “Okay, one of you go get your grandma. We gotta get my dress on me. She was waiting for me to give you your presents before she came back in here.”

Candy giggled. “I’ll get her.”

Kelly walked toward the garment bag protecting her wedding gown. She’d forced herself not to look at it for the past several weeks as she yearned for the day to arrive. She started to unzip the bag, but the zipper stuck. She zipped it back up just a bit to be sure the zipper was lined up right. She unzipped it again; this time a piece of the antique white fabric caught. Kelly gasped. “Oh no.”

She tried to gently pull the fabric away from the zipper’s teeth, but the metal seemed more determined to bite into her beautiful dress. Anxiety welled within her, and her hands started to shake. “No. No. No.”

Tears pooled in her eyes as she tried not to tug on the zipper or the fabric too hard.

“Here, Mom, let me help.” Zoey stood beside her. She nudged Kelly out of the way, then gently and quickly released her dress from captivity.

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