For Everly (32 page)

Several minutes passed as she allowed herself to grieve. She stared at his name, trying to get a hold of herself.

Eventually, she said, “I want you to know that I love you. I’ve always loved you. You were an amazing big brother. That’s why this is so hard.” She paused again, her chest heaving with emotion. “I’m still working on forgiving you. I hate feeling so much anger over what you did. I’ll never understand it. All you left me with is questions, and I’ll never know the answers. You were selfish.”

Those last words hurt the most to say. She couldn’t speak again as her emotions overwhelmed her. But her thoughts continued the conversation.

You were selfish, Aiden.

Because of you, lives were destroyed.

Why did you give up?

Why did you leave me?

It took her a moment, but she finally focused on those thoughts. Was her anger really directed at Aiden?

Since his death, she’d cut off her connections with other people one by one. First to go were her friends. It was easy enough to attribute the ending of those friendships to how differently she was treated at school after Aiden’s suicide.

The whispers behind her back. The lack of invitations to social functions. The discomfort on their faces when they had to talk to her.

But had she really made any effort to accept offers of comfort or a sympathetic ear? No. She’d chalked it all up to condescension, making it easier to separate herself from them.

Over time, she’d done similar things to keep people at bay. The two failed dates she attempted might have gone differently if she hadn’t already made up her mind that the guys wouldn’t want to stay with her if they knew the details about her past. She hadn’t even given them a chance.

Wasn’t the same true about Cole? she thought now. Sure, the way he brought up the topic of Aiden’s death in the heat of the moment had been harsh and unkind, but didn’t he have a point?

But rather than stay and have it out with him, she’d fled.

So who was really to blame for the way her life had turned out…broken to the point that she was sitting by herself in a cemetery on Christmas Eve?

Aiden?

Or her?

Chapter 43

Cole regretted his statement the moment he said it. He watched Everly’s face drain of color as she stepped away from him. Before he could even begin to formulate an apology, she ran.

The move caught him off-guard. By the time he managed to push himself to his feet and take off after her—killing his shin on the coffee table in the process—she was down the stairs. Although he was barefoot and wearing only a T-shirt and jeans, he ran outside to try and stop her from driving away. His fingers came millimeters from her bumper as she drove through the gates. He cursed up a storm as he ran back into the house.

He grabbed his phone off the coffee table and dialed her number. It rang four times and rolled to voicemail.

Damn it.

Hurrying to his bedroom, he pulled on sneakers without bothering with socks and grabbed his keys and wallet off of his dresser. On his way down to the garage, he grabbed his leather jacket out of the hallway closet. Within a minute, he was pulling out of his driveway and on his way to Jake’s house.

Dumbass
, he cursed himself as he tried her cell again from his car’s Bluetooth connection. Once again, he got her voicemail.

Pounding the steering wheel, he disconnected. Why had he said such an awful thing?

Because he’d been pissed, that was why.

He’d been stewing for days about her silence over her father’s abuse. Why the hell hadn’t she mentioned it to him? They’d texted and even talked on the phone between Friday and today. He’d given her multiple opportunities to open up to him. It had been all he could do not to point out that he could see the faint discoloration around her left eye. All he’d wanted to do was be there to offer her support, but she continued to hold part of herself back.

That wasn’t going to fly with him. Something that big had to be shared. Emotional hang-ups be damned.

Then she had to go and give him the game he’d been wanting. He’d sat there staring at it for a long moment, realizing that she had now given him the two best gifts of his life: her virginity and that game.

And he’d given her movies.

That she couldn’t watch.

Thinking about it now had him flushing with chagrin. Seriously? He’d thought DVDs about comic book characters would be a good gift for the woman he loved?

And there was the crux of it. He loved Everly. He was over the moon, head over heels in love with her. He felt like he was living a sappy romantic movie every time he thought about her.

It made him feel vulnerable. It also made him lash out at her more than he should have when she withheld important information about her life. In his mind, it stood to reason that she couldn’t possibly love him if she didn’t trust him enough to share such things with him.

So when she questioned his feelings about her, that flipped the switch. He’d gone instantly on the defensive.

Like a dumbass.

He tried her cell another time and got her voicemail again. Well, she couldn’t avoid him forever. She’d once told him not to let her get away with distancing herself. He’d be damned if he’d let her do that with him now.

Her car wasn’t in the driveway at her grandpa’s house. He sat in his car in the street absorbing that unexpected discovery. Then he dialed Jake’s home number.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Jake. It’s Cole.”

“Well, hi there. Didn’t expect to hear from you tonight. Merry Christmas.”

“Thanks. Merry Christmas to you, too.” Figuring he didn’t have much choice, he continued, “Look, Jake…the fact is, Everly and I had an argument. I said something stupid and she left. Has she been home since she left my house?”

“I haven’t seen her. How long ago did she leave?”

“Not even twenty minutes ago.”

“Well, sometimes she drives to clear her mind. I’ll have her call you when she gets home. It’s Christmas…y’all need to clear the air.”

“I know. Any idea where she might have gone?”

“Hmm. Sometimes she goes up to the stadium.”

“Great. Thanks, Jake. I’ll let you know if I catch up with her first.”

“You do that.”

They disconnected as Cole pulled away and headed in the direction of the stadium. It made sense that Everly would spend time there since she was such a fan of the sport. He really should have thought of it himself. Maybe Everly had a point about him failing to take note of things when it came to really knowing and understanding her. Relationships weren’t all about the big things, after all.

He drove around for nearly an hour down every street in the vicinity of the stadium, all to no avail. His worry grew as he headed back home and waited for Everly’s call. Every fifteen minutes, he dialed her cell. She still wasn’t answering.

When he got home, he called Jake again. Maybe Everly’s grandpa was having trouble convincing her to call him.

She still wasn’t home.

By the time midnight rolled around, he was sick with fear. What if she’d gotten into an accident? She’d been so upset when she left…she could have started crying and driven off the road.

He couldn’t forget about the person who had attacked her, either. What if that person knew where he lived? Rebecca did, after all. If it had been her or someone she hired, they would have his address. Could they have followed Everly and done something to her?

At one in the morning, he considered calling the police. But he knew enough that he’d be told Everly had to be gone for at least twenty-four hours before an investigation could be started. Not to mention it was Christmas.

His hands tied, he prayed for the phone to ring. He sat in front of the TV, not really absorbing anything on the screen.

By two, his calls to Everly’s cell rolled straight to voicemail. Not knowing what else to do, he called Wyatt and explained what had happened. Wyatt told him he’d make some calls to local ERs to make sure no one fitting Everly’s description had been admitted.

Thirty minutes later, he received a call back. No sign of Everly in the hospitals.

Cole didn’t know whether to curse or rejoice.

Just after three, his cell rang. It was Jake’s number. Hitting the accept button, he said, “Everly?”

“No, it’s me, Cole,” came Jake’s voice. Cole’s heart sank. “I couldn’t wait anymore to call you. You still haven’t heard from Everly?”

“No,” he said. His voice was strained with exhaustion and emotion that was getting harder and harder to tamp down. “I’m sorry, Jake.”

“This isn’t your fault, Cole. My girl has a stubborn streak. Maybe she’s thinks she’s teachin’ you a lesson.”

He wished that was true. But he knew Everly wouldn’t ever leave her grandpa alone and worrying like this, even if she was trying to prove something to Cole.

“What were you two arguin’ about?” Jake asked.

Sighing, Cole replied, “I got upset with her for not telling me what happened with her father on Friday night.”

He couldn’t bring himself to admit what he’d said about Aiden. It was too mortifying.

Then it hit him…what he should have realized hours ago. Getting to his feet and reaching for his coat, he headed down the stairs. There was just one thing left he needed to know.

“Jake, where is Aiden buried?”

Chapter 44

Everly awoke beside Aiden’s grave.

Snow was falling. The icy flakes hitting her already chilled skin woke her. Disoriented, she sat up and tried to remember what had happened. The last thing she remembered was sobbing uncontrollably as she clung to Aiden’s tombstone. She must have cried herself to sleep.

She looked at her watch to see how much time had passed. That was when she realized how dark it was.

Champ’s lights were off. That couldn’t be good.

She pushed herself to her feet. Shivers wracked her body. When she wobbled unsteadily, she swallowed a jolt of fear. It was freezing out here. She could be suffering from hypothermia. If she didn’t get somewhere warm, she could die.

At least she was in the right place for it, her mind joked.

Oh, boy.

Shoving away from Aiden’s grave, she shuffled one foot in front of the other until she reached Champ. It took her three tries to clutch her fingers around the door’s handle. Finally, she yanked the door open and dropped into the driver’s seat, pulling the door closed behind her. Though she knew it was a wasted effort, she attempted to turn the ignition. All she got was a click.

Grabbing her cell phone, she realized it was dead, too. Great.

Briskly rubbing her hands together to try and get some feeling into them, she looked over at the caregiver’s residence. It was still dark. She didn’t see any vehicles near it, either.

Tilting her watch face, she was able to discern that it was half past three in the morning. Her grandpa had to be worried sick about her.

And Cole, too, she silently allowed. It was foolish not to acknowledge that he cared about her, despite their argument. She knew he would have at least checked in with her grandpa to make sure she got home safe. It had likely been him vibrating her cell while she drove in a fog. Once he realized she never reached home, he was sure to be concerned.

What a great way to treat them both on Christmas
, she thought, swamped in guilt and misery.
Who’s the selfish one now?

Biting her lip, she debated what to do. She hated to wake anyone at this hour, but she didn’t want to wait until dawn. Plus, she really had to pee.

Grabbing her purse, she got out of Champ and locked the doors. She hustled up the path to the dark building at the end of it. By the time she reached it, feeling was starting to return to her fingers and toes and the snow was falling even faster. At least an inch had already accumulated on the ground.

Several knocks on the door resulted in no response. Either the caretaker couldn’t hear her, or no one was home.

Fighting panic and a painful bladder, Everly looked around. She tried to think about what might be open nearby. Then she remembered the Waffle House where she’d eaten several times during the planning of her mother’s funeral. The Waffle House never closed.

Praying her bladder held out, she started toward the restaurant at a brisk walk that soon bordered on a jog. The sidewalks were covered in snow and ice, so she tried to exercise caution. Still, she slipped a few times.

It took her fifteen minutes to get there. By then, she had to race to the bathroom the moment she walked in. Thank God she made it in time.

As she washed her hands in hot water, she looked up and caught her reflection in the mirror. Lord, she was a mess. Her hair hung around her face in ragged, wet lumps. Half of the gauze bandage over her stitches had come loose. The makeup she’d so carefully applied before her date with Cole ran down her cheeks. It left ugly smudges under her eyes, which were red and swollen.

She had enough vanity that she took the time to scrub her face clean and secure her hair in a loose bun with a couple of pins that she kept in her purse. Fortunately, she’d put a fresh gauze bandage in her purse, so she was able to re-cover her stitches. Although the bruise on her cheek was clearly visible, at least she didn’t look quite as much like a zombie who’d come to snack on the Waffle House patrons.

When she emerged from the bathroom, she realized there actually weren’t any customers in the restaurant. There were just two men wearing uniforms…a large black guy with salt-and-pepper hair who appeared to be the cook, and a muscular Hispanic guy who looked only a few years older than her. She guessed he was the server on duty.

They watched her with wary expressions as she approached. She could just imagine what they must have thought, seeing her dash in looking like she had and heading right for the bathroom. Her lovely bruise and gauze bandage probably didn’t help matters.

“Hi,” she said. “Merry Christmas. My car died and my cell battery’s caput. Could I borrow your phone?”