Forever Blue (4 page)

    
A milky haze of cigarette smoke hovered over Dad's head as he spoke. “I understand you and Carter have become fast friends,” he said, crushing the cigarette out into an ashtray on the patio table.

    
I waved the pungent smoke away from my face and said, “Yeah, he’s really nice.”

    
“I have Labor day weekend off.” He snaked his hand through his gray-streaked hair and gazed toward the sky. “How about we go down to Del Mar and spend the day at the beach or something? You, me, your mom, and Carter?”

    
“Really?”  I asked. “You mean it?”

    
His smile widened, carving out the dimples in his cheeks. “Sure. I don't see why not. We’ll make a day of it.”

    
This was an offer I couldn’t refuse. “That would be awesome, Dad.”

    
He held up the green and white cigarette pack. “Oh, and I promise I won’t bring these things with me,” he said, flicking the butt of his cigarette into the bushes.

    
We did make a day of it, but without Carter. According to Mary, he had too many auditions that weekend. She dismissed the whole trip with a wave of her hand, stating she couldn’t run the risk of him missing out on something important. She might have sounded convincing to my parents, but I could see right through her. Mary didn't bother to hide the way she felt about me hanging around her son. If she let him go with us, she’d have no control over him like the way she wanted to.

Chapter
3:

The Boy Next Door

1994

    
I made the transition from junior high to high school more easily than expected.
High school was as easy as standing on my own two feet
compared to what the first year of junior high was like.
Of course, my outlook on life would have had a totally different meaning if I had not met Carter. The way that boy carried himself fascinated me. He knew who he was and didn’t seek approval from others. Although, a part of me waited for the day he would blow me off just as Lindsay had.

    
One morning before class, I stood in front of the mirror at my locker. The most important question of the moment was whether I needed to add blush to my cheeks. I glanced at my reflection,
and noticed
how washed out I looked. My thoughts were dispersed by a rough tap on my shoulder.

    
“Hey.” Carter pulled off his black
backpack and slung it over his left
shoulder. “I caught you just in time.”

    
He’d grown at least five inches that summer, and
I suppressed the urge to comment on his sun-bleached hair. It had a tint of golden blond due to spending the last few weekends at a community swimming pool.

     
“Are you heading to class this second?” he asked.             

    
“No. What’s up?” I replied, taken aback by his eagerness.

    
“I just remembered someone’s having a birthday this weekend.”

    
I decided to play along. “Yeah? Does this someone have a name?”

    
“Oh, that’s top secret information,” he teased. “I’m trying to figure out if she has any big plans.”

     
I stuffed a textbook into my backpack and said, “No, not that I’m aware of.”

My birthday was
honestly
nothing to get excited about. When I was younger, Mom would throw me huge birthday parties, always with a carefully orchestrated theme linking all the decorations, napkins, cake, and games together. I invited all my grade school friends, one
of which included Lindsay Wells, but
the novelty wore off
as I got older.
For the past couple years, Mom and Dad just took me out to dinner and a movie. Then we’d come home, open presents, and eat cake and ice cream. I was quite pleased, however, that Carter joined us the previous year.

    
Carter moved in close with an earnest expression.
“I was thinking maybe we could go somewhere.”

    
“And where would that be?” I asked, incredulously. “We obviously don’t have a car or money. Your mom would never drive us anywhere or let us be alone together.” I tried to dismiss the feeling that he was up to something.

    
“Yeah, but I was hoping maybe you could ask your mom if she could drive us, since my mom is going out of town this weekend,” he said as we strolled the hallway. “I have this favorite restaurant in Newport Beach called Chris Morton. Do you know it?”

I blinked, a bit bowled over. Anyone who’s gone to Chris Morton’s Sunset Grill knows it’s a pricey steakhouse—a place Dad took Mom only on special occasions.

    
An inadvertent chuckle escaped my lips. “If I didn’t know better, I would think you were making this out to be like some sort of date.”

    
“Yeah, so what’s wrong with that?” he asked, like I insulted him in some way.

    
I stared at Carter like a hypnotized zombie. A minute passed, and then another. It took a couple more moments for me to catch my breath. The sincerity in the boy’s placid greenish-blue eyes told me I wasn’t dreaming. My best friend just asked me out on a date. I had no idea how to react.

    
Before I could get a word out, Lindsay Wells strode right past us. I fixed my stare on her mini skirt that seemed to get shorter every school year. Word around campus was that she had dated nearly every
jock in school—and she was only fourteen. I can’t say I wasn’t envious. What I wouldn’t have done for her long sun-kissed legs and all that perfect bouncy hair. At times, I would have killed to have a spot in her social circle, complete with as many boyfriends as I wanted. But yet here I was just trying to survive the school year. Everything came to a standstill the second I caught her eyeing Carter like he was some blue-plate special on the cafeteria menu. I never expected one fleeting look to stir up so many emotions.

    
“Alexa—” Carter said, snapping his fingers in front of my face.

    
I shook out of my daze and said, “Let’s do it. I just have to ask my mom.” If I didn’t seize this opportunity, someone else out there would—someone like whatever it was Lindsay had become.

    
“Cool. We’ll work out the details later. I have to get to class.” He sped past me, treading backward. “Oh, and I have some awesome news. I’ll tell you at lunch!” he yelled back over his shoulder as he hustled
down the hallway.

***

      
We ate at a secluded rusted metal table underneath a large eucalyptus tree
during our lunch break.
Carter and I had a habit of distancing ourselves from other students whenever we could. We had each other, and somehow we were okay with that.

     “So, what is this awesome news
that
you wanted to tell me about?” I asked. Before I could take a bite of my sandwich, a glob of chicken salad oozed out and dripped onto the table.

   
“Oh yeah, I almost forgot.”  He grabbed a handful of my chips,
and shoved
a few into his mouth. “There’s this huge audition going on next week—a national search, I guess you could call it.”

   
I looked up at him through the sunlight that bleached his face like an old photograph. “For what?”

    
“There’s this major record producer in town looking for new talent,” he said, licking salt from his fingertips.

    
For the last two years, Carter awaited his big break.  He was so close I could almost feel it coming.

    
“I’m sure your mom won’t let you pass that up.”

     He smirked at my comment and replied, “Yeah, I'm going. My mom wants me to come up with a routine that proves I can really sing—you know, blow them away or something.” He rolled his eyes. “There will probably be a million kids trying out, but I figure, what’s the worst that can happen? So you know I won’t be able to see you after school for the rest of the week, right?”

     I took another bite of my sandwich and smiled back at him halfheartedly. Mary treated Carter like he was in boot camp
when a big audition was in the works.
She went as far as locking him up inside the house after school. His main focus was to be rehearsing for the audition at all times. Carter told me that once she even locked him in the bathroom until he knew his lines verbatim.

    
“Yeah, I know the drill.”

    
“Cross your fingers for me, Alexa.” Carter reached for my hand and squeezed it gently.
   
“Remember mink coats and limo rides.”

***

     Exactly how does a girl ask her parents if she can go on a date for the very first time? I had an overwhelming sense that my parents wouldn’t be too keen on the whole idea of letting their fourteen-year-old daughter go out with a boy all alone. On second thought, they knew Carter quite well and adored him. What harm could the two of us really do? I approached Mom
that evening
while she sat at the dining room table sewing a button on a blouse.

“Hi, honey. I haven’t seen you all afternoon. How was your day?”

   
I took a seat in the
chair beside her. “It was, um—interesting.”

    
“Oh, that’s good to
hear,” Mom said as she weaved
a needle in and out of the silky blue fabric. Ever since my so-called friends abandoned me in seventh grade, Mom took a keen interest in my social life. “Did you make any new friends today, or was it just you and Carter?”

    
Heat rose on the back of my neck
at the mention of Carter. I had to get it out in the open
or risk wimping out. “Hey, Mom—”

    
“Yes, sweetie?”

    
“So, um…when’s Dad coming home?” 

    
“Very late,” Mom replied. “I’m hoping he’ll be home at a decent time tomorrow night, but you never know with his crazy hours at that car lot. Someone could pop in at the last minute, and then he ends up being there all night. I—”

    
“Mom…” I interrupted.

    
Mom’s
black-rimmed eyeglasses slipped to the tip of her nose
when she finally turned toward me.
“Honey, I’m really trying to focus here. What do you need?”

     
“Never mind.” I wanted to kick myself.
I didn’t know why it was so
hard for
me to say what I needed to say.

    
Mom laced her fingers together delicately and eyed me in curiosity. “Alexa—is something bothering you?”

    
“Well, my birthday is this weekend, and—”

    
A smile broke out on her face like sunlight on an overcast day. “Are you trying to hint at a gift you want? Is that it?”

   
A tightness crawled up my
throat, and I suddenly
found it hard to swallow. “No, it’s not that.  It’s just… well… Carter sort of asked if he could take me out on my birthday.”

    
Mom’s eyes went wide in astonishment. “What?”

    
“Never
mind. It’s silly.”

    
“No, hold on a minute,” she said, laying a well-manicured hand on my arm. “Do you mean to tell me that Carter asked you out on a date?”

    
“I don’t know. I guess so.”

    
“Well, I’ll be,” she said with amusement in her eyes. “Where does he propose on taking you?”

     “Chris Morton’s Sunset Grill.” My body temperature rose at least ten degrees, like I was on the verge of breaking out into a cold sweat. “It’s his favorite restaurant.”

    
“I never imagined this day would come so soon.”

    
Weighing my words carefully,
I asked, “So you don’t mind? It’s okay?”

     “I see no problem with it. I’m actually very surprised his mother is allowing this to happen. How did that come about?”

    
The question stopped me cold. Mom would never allow me to go on the date if she knew Mary hadn’t given her approval. “Well, Mary is going out of town on Friday night, so she wants to know if you can drive us,” I lied—at least partially.

    
“Oh, I would be honored. Should I go over there and let her know I’m okay with it?” Mom asked, rising from her chair.

    
“Uh—no,” I said abruptly. “I’ll just let Carter know tomorrow at school. Mary’s really busy getting ready for her trip.”

***

    
“You ready? Looks like you’re slowing down in your old age,” Carter teased.

    
We were in the middle of our usual game of midnight basketball in the park.

     My eyes focused on the ball gripped tightly in his hands. “No, I’m actually like a fine wine. I get better with age.” I
had
never tried fine wine—or any wine, for that matter. I heard the analogy in movies a thousand times and thought it spoke to my maturity.

    
I stole the ball from his grip and dribbled to other side of the court.

    
“There’s no way I’m letting you make this shot,” Carter said, chasing after me.

    
A brief spell of dizziness spiraled through me as I continued to dodge him. I attempted to make another shot. To my shock, the ball made it in with one perfect swish.

    
“Score!” I yelled.

    
Carter offered me a strained smile and wiped the sweat forming on his brow with his arm. “Four-four.” He sighed in resignation and dribbled the ball. “Whoever makes this next shot wins the game.” He escaped to the other side of the court. As if to prove that he was some sort of hot shot, Carter aimed for the basket right before I was able to steal the ball. “Woo hoo! Nothing but net, baby.”

    
I swallowed against the dryness in my throat and said, “Whatever. That’s your first win in weeks.” A cold breeze whipped around me, cooling my heated face. “Pure luck, that’s all.”

    
“So, I’m making a comeback.”

    
I pushed him playfully. “Whatever.”

    
“Oh hey, did you ask your mom about Saturday?” he asked, twirling the ball in the air like a show-off.

    
“Yup, tonight. She said she’d do it.” The thought of us actually going on a real date still hadn’t sunk in. Honestly, thinking about it made my stomach flutter, like I swallowed a dozen butterflies.

    
“Cool,” he said with an elated smile. “Don’t worry about the details. I’ve got it handled.”