Forever My Girl (11 page)

“Well, I hate to break up this party, but I promised Miss Peyton we’d watch at least one game downstairs,” Liam says causing Peyton to jump and Noah’s face to fall. Liam leans over and whispers something into Noah’s ear and he smiles.

Seeing Noah’s face light-up, I realize that I need to put my anger aside and do what’s right for my son and give Liam a chance. My decision will hurt Nick, but it’s someth
ing that I need to do for Noah.

CHAPTER 17

LIAM

Peyton and I watch an action-packed game that goes into overtime. I still can’t get over the fact she knows the calls better than half of the officials. She has me cracking up; she’s extremely vocal and holds her position well.

“Are you going to play football?” I ask her, curious whether this is something she and Mason discussed.

“Well, I’m not going to be a cheerleader like my mama was.”

Her response effectively shuts my mouth. Mason loved having Katelyn on the sidelines for his games and I admit it was sweet pleasure having my girl cheer for me. The best part was the away games. The cheerleaders would ride back with us. Josie and I always sat in back where it was darkest. My lips never left a part of her body until we pulled into the school parking lot.

Elle comes down, dressed the exact opposite of her sister. These girls are a spitting image of their parents.

“Mommy says it’s time for lunch.” She turns and runs up the stairs, not waiting for an answer.

“What do you think? Should we head up for some grub?”

Peyton climbs onto my back. I hoist her up and run around their basement like a crazed man just so I can listen to her laugh.

“Can we do this again next Sunday?”

I stop running and pull her around to rest on my hip. “I gotta head back to work, but maybe we can watch the game together on the computer.”

“I don’t have a computer.” I’m not going to let that stop me. I kiss her cheek and tell her not to worry about it.

When we get upstairs, everyone has congregated in the living room for lunch. Katelyn made just about every football food known to man. Peyton and I fix our plates and join everyone for the next game.

Noah’s sitting on the floor so I sit down next to him. I notice that he smiles, but I’m not going to call attention to it. I told him after I watched the game with Peyton we’d go out back and work on his pass route timing. I’d like to find a way to prolong my day with him, but I know Josie isn’t going to let me. I still need to sit down and talk to her about Noah and some type of visitation. Maybe we start with phone calls every few nights and I can come back to see him every month.

More importantly we need to tell him that I’m his dad, whether Josie wants too or not. I can imagine he’s going to be hurt and probably hate my guts, but I’ll do whatever I can to make it up to him. Not being a part of his life is not an option for me.

Noah’s plate is empty, so I take mine and his into the kitchen to throw them away. Josie comes in behind me, her perfume weaving its way into my senses. I hate that she can smell so fucking good at Sunday football and I can’t touch her.

“Hey,” she says, shocking me. I thought for sure we were playing the avoidance game.

“Hi,” I reply, barely looking at her. I pretend to clean, the ultimate chick move in avoiding an awkward conversation.

She just stares at me, her hands pulling desperately at her belt loops. I can’t stand here and look at her so I call for Noah and ask if he’s ready to go outside. He runs up to me, football in hand and races me to the door. I take one last look at her, her head down, teeth pushing a deep dent in her bottom lip, before heading outside.

I teach Noah everything I know. I’m surprised I even remember half of this shit, but it all comes back to me with each question he asks. I realize how lucky Nick is, living the life that should’ve been mine. He’s got my girl and my boy and there isn’t jack shit I can do about it except watch from the sidelines.

“Can you come to my game on Friday?” Noah asks with such hope in his voice. Just looking at him tears my heart into pieces.

“Let’s go sit down,” I say as I set my hand on his shoulder and bring him over to the picnic bench. “You know that I live in Los Angeles, right?” Noah nods. “Well I have to go back to work, I have deadlines and people are depending on me. I was supposed to just be here for the funeral and leave the next day, but then I met you and I really like hanging out with you and Peyton asked me to watch football so I stayed. I tell myself I’m leaving tomorrow and I need to do something first, but then I gotta head back to my cat, ya know, because he misses me.”

“But he hates you.”

“Yeah, buddy he does.” I start to laugh, Noah joins in. When his blue eyes look up at me, I know I need to make this right. “I’m kinda hoping I can talk to your mom and maybe we can talk on the phone or something.”

“She’ll say no. She hates you or something, says I’m not supposed to talk to you. I did today because she won’t yell in front of Katelyn.”

Listening to my son tell me that my girl – his mother – hates me really doesn’t sit well with me.

I need to fix it.

“I’ll talk to your mom okay? Just don’t be hard on her. She lost her friend and sometimes memories are hard to deal with.”

He nods and when he looks at me, a piece of me dies. I don’t want to leave him even if he never knows I’m his dad. I want to be his friend.

We both look up when the sliding glass door opens. Josie steps out with her arms wrapped around her body. Her eyes are red, she’s been crying. I want to ask her why, but I also don’t want to care. I should, but I can’t. She has Nick and I need to accept that.

“I guess it’s time for you to go,” I say to Noah who looks like he’s about to throw the football at his mom.

“Actually,” she says as she steps closer. “I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner with me and Noah tomorrow at our house.”

I look past her, into the living room where Nick is talking animatedly with Katelyn. “No thanks,” I say much to Noah’s chagrin. I hold my hand up for him to stop. “I’m not a fan of Nick’s. I’m not sure I can make it through dinner with him.”

Josie turns and looks into the house and when she turns around she’s shaking her head. “Nick is going away tomorrow for a conference. It will just be me and Noah.”

No Nick. My girl, my son and me? Sign me up.

“What time?”

“How about five-thirty? I close the shop at five and walk home—”

“I’ll pick you up,” I say before really thinking about it. I only have the Ducati and one helmet. Guess I’m shopping for that tomorrow. Josie tries to hide her elation but her face tells me everything I need to know; she’s fantasized about being on the bike with me and I’m about to make her fantasy come true.

“So I guess I’ll see you,” I say to Noah. This makes him smile.

I get up and walk the few steps to Josie. I’m closer than I should be, especially with Nick inside the house. I lean in, my lips grazing her cheek. “You’ll love the ride, I promise,” I whisper into her ear. As much as I want to see her expression, touching her has killed me. I move away as quickly as I can and back into the house.

I fire up my bike, revving the engine so she gets an idea of what she’s in for tomorrow and take off. Her scent lingers on my skin, filling my helmet. I’m not sure how I’ll handle Josie on the back of my bike tomorrow, but it will be my five minutes of paradise.

CHAPTER 18

JOSIE

My palms are sweating.

I’m watching the clock.

The minute hand is moving ungodly slow. Every tick echo’s throughout the shop. I sent Jenna home early because she kept laughing at me and none of this is funny. I would’ve called and told him that I’d walk home but I don’t have his number and it’s not like I can call directory assistance for Liam Page’s freaking number.

They’d laugh at me just like Jenna has all day. Except they would probably cackle because directory service is usually old women who have nothing better to do except give people like me a hard time when you ask for something totally and completely stupid.

Oh god. This is like high school all over again.

Every time I heard a motorcycle outside I ran to the window and when Jenna snickered I pretended to straighten something out. I hate her today.

I wipe my hands on my jeans for the millionth time. He should be here any moment and I’ll tell him I can’t ride with him because I have no helmet and those are required and even if they weren’t I wouldn’t get on that death trap. He might kill me for keeping Noah from him. I mean that seems logical, right?

The door chimes and before I can turn and greet the customer, I smell his cologne. I take a deep breath before turning around. I don’t know why but this feels like a date when it’s so not a date. I mean I’m engaged to another man and we’re going to get married and I can’t date Liam regardless of our history. I need to turn off my brain.

When I finally lay my eyes on him, he’s delicious, all six feet of him. He’s not wearing the black leather jacket I’ve grown accustomed to and once again I find myself staring at his arms. My mind wanders up his left arm and then his right. My fingers want to reach out and trace the ink. My heart wants to know if they hurt, if he wants more.

He’s allowing me to stare at him, drink him in and I think I realize that this might be the last time I see him. He may not want to tell Noah that he’s his dad. Hell, he may not want to even know Noah past this trip. I’m not sure I want that.

“Are you ready, Jojo?” My heart soars and it shouldn’t. I should tell him not to call me that, but I don’t. He’s watching my every move, waiting for me to freak out on him.

“I can walk,” I mumble.

Liam rolls his eyes and shakes his head. When he reaches for my hand I let him take it. As soon as he touches me, it’s like a thousand butterflies fluttering over my skin. I haven’t felt this way in years. I take two steps toward him, leaving just a small space between us. In a few short minutes I’ll be touching him and I may not want to stop.

My mind is foggy, but I need to keep my senses clear. I remind myself that I’m an engaged woman. The man before me, this sexy beautiful man who is taking my hand in his like he’s done so many times before, is the same man that broke my heart.

He lets go of my hand as soon as we're outside. I want to reach for him, but I know it’s not the right thing to do. He holds a helmet in his hand and smiles when he shows it to me.

“I got this for you,” he says before slipping it over my head. He’s still smiling when he fixes my hair on the outside. I’m smiling too, but he can’t see me. “Where do you live?”

I give him my address and watch as he swings his leg over and straddles his bike. “Put your hand on my shoulder and bring your leg over.” I do as he says. Once I’m situated he puts on his helmet and starts his bike. The vibration sends chills up my spine and I know now why women love a man with a motorcycle.

He reaches behind and pulls my hands forward, wrapping them around his torso. My front is pressed up against his back and this is just like I imagined it would be. I rest my chin, as much as I can, on his shoulder and I can feel his body relax before putting his bike into gear.    

He drives down Main Street, maintaining the speed limit, taking each turn to my house with ease. I never thought I’d feel so safe on a motorcycle.

He pulls into the driveway and turns off the bike. He removes his helmet and helps me get off first. When I pull off my helmet he starts laughing and shaking his head.

“What the hell is your problem?” I ask as I start patting down my hair. This just proves why I should never wear a helmet.

“Nothing, I’ve just imagined you a million times sitting behind me, but never did I imagine you’d flip your hair back and forth when you took off the helmet.”

“You’ve imagined me on your bike?” I ask my voice barely above a whisper. He nods and puts the kickstand down so he can get off.

“You’re the first girl I’ve ever let ride with me.” He steps closer, his fingers move a strand of hair way from my face, curling it behind my ear. “The only one, Jojo.” He steps away, giving me some much needed space. I need to understand what just happened.

He follows me into the house, through the door leading to the kitchen and dining room. He looks around, taking in my small home. Nick says we can move after we’re married, but Noah and I have lived here since I left school. Not sure I want to move just yet.

Noah comes running out of his room and hugs Liam. I leave them to have their moment and move into the kitchen and start preparing dinner. I made most of it last night so Liam could spend as much time as possible with Noah.

“Noah, did you finish your homework?”

“No, can I finish it after Liam leaves?”

“Can I see your homework? Maybe I can help.” Noah runs up to his room, his footsteps heavy and solid.

“Hey, Noah?” I yell.

“Yeah?”

“Why don’t you play a game or something for a few minutes, I need to talk to Liam.”

“Okay,” he yells back. The TV turns on instantly, loud with some auto racing game.

“Thank you for this, Josie.”

I smile and nod, not sure how to respond.

“I’m supposed to leave tomorrow, but Noah says he has a game on Friday and I really don’t want to miss it.”

I turn on the oven and place dinner inside to heat up. I motion for Liam to sit at the table. He pulls out my chair for me, something Nick has never done. I sit down, clasping my hands in front of me.

“Did you really not know?” I ask. I hate asking, but I need to know. Liam shakes his head, his eyes focusing on something… anything but me. When he meets my eyes, I can see the pain, he’s telling the truth.

“I found your agent or whatever and called,” I start, hating that I have to relive this time of my life. A time when I felt so desperate to reach him, when I needed him the most and he wasn’t there. “I left message after message until someone finally called back and said that you told them that you didn’t know me.”