Forgive and Forget (10 page)

“Joe, wait.” Tom caught up to him, taking hold of his arm and turning him. “You didn’t blow it. Your gut told you not to trust these guys, and you followed your instinct. You were protecting me, and I appreciate that. This whole thing has me on edge. I didn’t mean to take it out on you. I’d never want you to place yourself in a situation you’re not comfortable with for my sake.” He put his hand to Joe’s cheek and Joe leaned into the touch. “Please, forgive me for being such a jackass.”

Joe smiled, his face growing warm at Tom’s proximity. His words got caught in his throat and all he could do was nod. He was captivated by Tom’s smile, by those intense eyes.

And then Tom kissed him.

TOM
was lost in Joe’s lips. They were soft and sweeter than any pie Tom was sure the man had ever baked. A low, deep moan escaped Joe, sending Tom’s senses into turmoil. Joe hesitantly wrapped his strong arms around Tom, and it made Tom’s heart thunder in his ears. Joe might be shy, but a fire raged inside him yearning to be stoked, and that only intensified Tom’s desire. He gently pushed Joe, forcing him to move back until the back of his legs hit the sofa and he dropped down onto the cushions. Tom didn’t falter. He straddled Joe and gave his jaw a small, but firm squeeze.

Tom pushed his tongue against those soft lips, demanding entrance to the heavenly heat that waited inside Joe’s mouth. After a brief hesitation on Joe’s part, his lips parted and Tom slipped his tongue inside, a thrilling sense of triumph surging through him when Joe moaned. Tom ground his hips down against Joe’s so he could feel what he did to Tom, but Joe was still holding back, his spine rigid and his muscles taut.

Reluctantly, Tom tore his mouth away, but only to take Joe’s earlobe between his teeth, gently nipping and licking. “Let go, Joe. Just let go. I know this all seems kind of crazy, but I’ve never felt anything remotely like this for anyone before. I know it. In my heart, I know. There’s something about you, and I want to find out what it is. Please let me in.”

Something in Joe seemed to snap, and all at once he was scrambling to get Tom’s shirt off, pulling it over his head and then tossing it to the floor. He looked Tom over, the lust in his eyes threatening to set Tom ablaze.

“My God, look at you.” Joe ran his hands appreciatively over Tom’s torso, from the tight muscles of his abdomen up over his chest to his broad shoulders, leaving Tom trembling. He couldn’t imagine ever wanting anything as badly as he wanted Joe right this moment, and his need was making him desperate to do some touching of his own. He made quick work of relieving Joe of his apron then T-shirt. Tom thought his heart was going to burst when Joe shyly averted his gaze and wrapped an arm around his torso.

“I’m a baker. Bread and pies are kind of my weakness. I stay in shape, but….” He poked his barely there belly and let out a bashful chuckle. Tom gently took Joe’s prodding finger and brought that hand to his lips for a kiss.

He couldn’t admire Joe for long without the man getting restless or embarrassed, but he wished Joe knew how beautiful he was. The man was in great shape, sinewy and well-toned, with skin that was amazingly soft. He wasn’t all hard muscle like Tom, and somehow that made Joe even more irresistible to him. Tom couldn’t explain the feeling, had no idea why certain things came to mind, but touching Joe was… real, honest, and oddly made him feel safe and at home.

“Joe, look at me.”

Joe did, hesitantly, his blue-green eyes searching Tom’s for… what? Hope? If that was the case, Tom would do everything in his power not to let Joe down. He made no effort to hide the desire he was feeling and he explored Joe’s skin as he spoke, his gaze never leaving Joe’s. “You’re stunning. Every inch of you. I love the way you feel. There’s
nothing
I would change, Joe. Nothing.” He placed a hand to Joe’s chest over his heart, his thumb finding a pink nipple that pebbled under his touch and brought the most delicious whimper from Joe. Tom flicked the little nub, reveling in Joe’s gasp as he writhed and wriggled under Tom.

Joe thrust his hips upward as he drew Tom down against him. Good God, he could feel how hard Joe was. All that lay between them was a couple of thin layers of clothing, and it was enough to ignite the fire kindling inside Tom. He picked up his pace, eagerly seeking,
needing
more.

“Tell me what you want, Joe. Anything and it’s yours,” Tom promised breathlessly, surprised at the realization he meant every word. Something deep down wanted to give Joe everything, wanted to hold him in his arms, protect him from the world, keep him safe and never let go. Despite his lack of memories, something in Tom knew Joe needed that more than he did, needed to be assured he was worthy of unfathomable affection, and damn if Tom didn’t want to be the one to do it. Tom trusted his gut. It was something he’d always relied on. Joe was special.

“Kiss me,” Joe rasped, almost too low for Tom to hear. “Please.”

Those few little words were all Tom needed. Everything inside him sizzled and sparked with life. He captured Joe’s mouth and kissed him feverishly, desperate to explore and taste. His body felt like it wanted to consume Joe. Nothing had the power to control the blaze roaring within him except for the timid, beautiful man underneath him.

Tom reached between them and freed their erections, pulling away only long enough to spit into his hand before crushing his mouth back against Joe’s and taking them both in hand. Joe’s little gasps and moans urged him forward.

“Oh, sweet Jesus,” Joe hissed, letting out a shaky breath.

“Is this okay?” Tom breathed, brushing his lips over Joe’s cheek. “It feels so damn good, Joe, but I’ll stop if you want me to.”

“No, don’t,” Joe all but begged. “Don’t stop, Tom. Oh, God….”

Feeling an overwhelming need to please Joe, Tom tightened his grip and quickened his pumping fist, delighting in Joe’s sweet sounds as he threw his head back, exposing the smooth, expansive flesh of his neck. Tom took advantage and poked his tongue out to taste and lick Joe from his collarbone to his jaw line.

“You taste like your pies, Joe. So sweet, warm, and full of life.”

Joe sprung forward as if some magic switch had been hit, and Tom couldn’t help his surprised gasp. His heavy breaths became pants as Joe buried his head against Tom’s neck and his hand joined in on the stroking, their hips thrusting wildly and erratically. Joe’s grip on Tom was almost painful, and his low growl reverberated against Tom’s scorching skin. Cupping his free hand at the back of Joe’s neck, Tom held Joe to him as he met every fraught thrust of Joe’s hips with one of his own.

“Tom, I—I’m going to—” Joe’s words cut off sharply as he cried out, clutching Tom so tightly he was sure there would be some bruising the next day. Joe’s body trembled and shook beneath him as he rode his climax, the feel of his warm come coating both their bellies enough for Tom to find his own release. He muffled his hoarse cry against Joe’s hair, the silkiness and scent of it swirling around in his head helping him lose himself in the rolling waves of pleasure, their hands milking every last drop from each other.

They slumped together, spent, each man’s weight holding up the other, their breathing slowly coming down from the clouds. Joe’s chest rose and fell steadily against his own, and Tom could feel himself starting to drift off. He moved his hand and Joe groaned, rousing Tom and reminding him that if he didn’t clean them up, they’d get stuck like this.

With his free hand, Tom carefully pushed Joe back into the cushions and leaned forward to place a tender kiss against Joe’s lips, smiling when he found the man’s eyes closed and his expression one of contentment. His heart swelled, knowing he’d been the one to put it there.

He pulled Joe in for a kiss, the touch of those soft lips a delicious sensation. He willed himself to go slow, allowing his hands to roam over Joe’s body, over his arms, his chest, coaxing him to open up. His efforts were rewarded more quickly than he expected, and Joe parted his lips. Not wanting to spook him, he took Joe’s mouth tenderly, his kisses more like caresses. He desperately wanted to feel all of Joe, to touch, taste, and explore every curve, every muscle. It took a great deal of self-control not to let his imagination run away with him. He wrapped his arms around Joe and his sinewy body that fit against Tom’s like it was molded to do so.

“You’re holding back,” Joe murmured against Tom’s lips.

“I don’t want to rush you.”

Joe pulled back, the fire smoldering in those ocean-colored eyes making Tom grateful that he was sitting, because his knees had turned to jelly.

“Why me?” Joe asked quietly, slipping his fingers into Tom’s hair and absently stroking. He must have made some kind of noise because Joe chuckled softly. “You like that, huh?”

Tom moaned and let his eyes drift closed. “Oh, yeah. Feels good.”

“You didn’t answer my question.” Joe continued to stroke, and Tom had to be careful he didn’t fall asleep right here on Joe’s lap. Those long, slender fingers felt so soothing.

“Why
not
you?” Tom smiled when Joe gave his hair a playful tug.

“Look at you. Whoever you are, whatever you do, I’ll bet it suits you. I know you’re grateful for my help, and I’ll still help you, you don’t need to—”

“Wait a moment,” Tom cut him off, unable to believe what he was hearing. He would have been angry were it not for the utterly wretched look on Joe’s handsome face. It made him wonder what could possibly have happened to this sweet man to make him think so little of himself. He remembered Joe saying he’d been hurt, and he couldn’t even bear to think of some bastard breaking Joe’s heart. A dark, deep-rooted anger bubbled up inside Tom, scaring the hell out of him. He didn’t know why he felt so sick to his stomach, but he did his best to push it aside. He took Joe’s hands in his and met Joe’s reserved gaze.

“Joe, I’m not attracted to you because you’re helping me. I can make sense of my own feelings enough to know where they’re coming from, and I’m attracted to you because you’re beautiful. I’m fascinated by you because you’re like no one I’ve ever met, and I know that because there can’t possibly be another man like you out there. I’m sure of it. If I run into a cop, he’s probably going to throw me in jail thinking I’m all doped up because I can’t keep from grinning like an idiot, and it’s all because of you.” He ran his thumb over Joe’s bottom lip.

“This is crazy. What if you’re…? I mean….” Joe had trouble meeting Tom’s eyes.

“A criminal? A murderer? A blackmailer?” Tom held back a smile. “A nutritionist?”

Joe jerked away from him, horrified. “Get out.”

“Because I might be a murderer or a nutritionist?” Tom teased.

With hands on his hips, Joe narrowed his eyes, a very somber expression on his face. “If you start telling me how much sugar to put into my pies, you’re out on your butt. Don’t care how cute it is.”

“Come here,” Tom chuckled, snatching hold of Joe’s chin and giving his lips another sweet kiss. “Well, my fillings suggest I’m either not a nutritionist or a real lousy one. Don’t you worry. I’m pretty sure I’m none of those things, and if I were….” He sat back, his expression grave. “I’ll give it all up for you. Whatever man I may have been in the past, if it makes me someone you’d be disappointed in, I’ll stop.”

Joe quickly tucked himself away and sat with his bottom lip between his teeth. Tom sorted himself out before getting to his feet. “Hold that thought.” He quickly went to the bathroom and washed his hands before grabbing a hand towel and running it under the tap. He returned and handed it to Joe, whose cheeks were flushed as he wiped his hands then his stomach. He folded up the small towel and put it to one side before taking his T-shirt and slipping into it. Tom sat beside him, watching him carefully.

“Joe?” Tom got a queasy feeling in his belly and prayed that he hadn’t messed things up. Was Joe regretting what happened? Was he going to ask Tom to leave?

Joe covered his face with his hands. That couldn’t be good. When Joe sprang up from the couch so quickly he almost scared the life out of Tom, he started to think the worst. Then again, this was probably normal for Joe. Not what happened on the couch—that was very obviously not normal for Joe—but Joe’s restlessness.

“Jesus, what have I done?” Joe paced from one end of the living room to the other so quickly and repeatedly, Tom thought the guy was going to burn a hole in the floor. Figuring he’d better do something before Joe hurt himself, Tom got to his feet and tried to stop Joe, but the man jumped out of his reach. Doing his best not to feel the sting of that rejection, Tom put his hands up in front of him and took a step back.

“Please talk to me, Joe. Tell me what’s going through your mind.”

“I shouldn’t have done that,” Joe replied anxiously, his words hitting Tom like a fist in the gut. Before he could respond, Joe shook his head and continued. “My God, you’re hurt and I just… just…. What’s wrong with me? I took advantage of you. It’s despicable. I—”

“That’s enough,” Tom insisted, bringing Joe’s pacing to a halt. “Nothing is wrong with you, Joe. You didn’t take advantage of me.
I’m
the one who started it.” His voice softened, and he couldn’t help the queasy feel in his stomach when he thought about how Joe recoiled from his touch. “I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted. I didn’t mean to push you into doing something you didn’t want to do.”

“That’s not it at all. In fact it’s the opposite, but… what if you have a family somewhere, kids, who are waiting for you? Starting something wouldn’t be fair to any of us.”

Tom gaped at him. That was certainly the last thing he expected Joe to say. “Kids?” He shook his head in disbelief, his gaze going to the couch before it came back to rest on Joe. “I think it’s pretty safe to say that I don’t have a spouse or kids. Jesus Christ, Joe. Do I need to remind you of what happened?” The idea of a family appealed to Tom greatly, and although he couldn’t remember the people in his life, no way did he have a husband or kids, because the thought of cheating or hurting his family made him sick to his stomach.

Joe’s face went up in flames, and Tom almost felt bad for him, but he wasn’t about to back down now. He got the feeling Joe didn’t deal with confrontation often.