Forgiving Lies (15 page)

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Authors: Molly McAdams

Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #New Adult, #Coming of Age, #Contemporary, #Contemporary Women

BOOK: Forgiving Lies
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Kash was sitting on the couch, the room dark except for the glow from the TV. He was pressing buttons on the remote and turned to look at me, then did a double take. Through the light coming from the screen, I watched his eyes drift over me as I walked toward him. Without saying anything, I pulled the remote out of his hand and dropped it onto the coffee table before placing one knee on the couch, followed by the other so I was straddling him.

“Rachel . . . ,” he whispered, and looked down to where I was almost sitting on him before meeting my gaze.

I placed one hand on his chest and smiled softly when I felt his heart beating just as fast as mine. “I’m done playing this game, Kash. I’m done hiding.”

His hands cupped my cheeks as he continued to stare at me, and slowly—so slowly—he brought my face down to his and brushed my lips with his once . . . then twice, before pressing them firmly against my own. And just like the first time, I had the overwhelming feeling that I was exactly where I belonged.

Pulling away, he looked at me for a few heavy moments. “You’re sure?”

Hoping my actions would be answer enough, I lowered myself until I was sitting on his lap, his growing erection pressed firmly against my heat, and I almost moaned as I captured his mouth. Our lips moved against each other, and soon, his tongue was torturing mine in the sweetest way possible. I rocked against him, and the goose bumps came back full force when he moaned into my mouth. His hands left my cheeks, slowly sliding down my neck and breasts, his thumbs brushing over my hardened nipples before continuing down until he was grabbing my hips and pressing us closer together.

Our kisses started getting rougher, our breathing heavier as I continued to rock my hips against him. Running my tongue across his bottom lip, I hit metal and lightly bit down and tugged on his ring. The sexiest growl I’ve ever heard worked its way from Kash’s chest, and his hands left my hips to slip under the bottom of the shirt I was wearing. I lifted myself off his lap and his warm hands moved up my thighs, over my hips, and to my butt, where they stilled momentarily before quickly going back to my hips.

Kash leaned away and looked down at my legs as his hands made their journey back to my butt. A devilish grin flashed across his face before his lips made a trail up my throat as one hand came back around my hip to my thigh. “You’re not wearing anything under this shirt?” he asked softly against the sensitive skin behind my ear.

“Kash . . .” I pulled his head back to press my lips to his and pleaded, “Touch me.”

The hand on my thigh slowly trailed over and up but continued to stay just on the inside of my thigh. I started to lower myself, but the hand on my butt flew to my hip, and both hands squeezed to keep me where I was. An aggravated groan left me, and Kash laughed softly against my mouth.

“Be patient.”

He released his hold and I didn’t move as he dipped his head to suck on my breast through the shirt. The hand on the inside of my thigh went back to making lazy circles, each one bringing him closer to where I was aching for him. My breathing was getting rapid and I had to grab on to the back of the couch for support as he continued to tease me. I thought I would die if he didn’t touch me soon. Each circle on my thigh and teasing bite to my hard nipples had the heat in my stomach growing. My whole body was buzzing and I was so turned on I was afraid I’d fall apart the second he finally did touch me.

Just when I was about to start begging, his fingers trailed against my heat, his thumb stopping on the sensitive bud as his fingers teased my opening before he slid one inside me.

“Fuck, Rachel.” He growled and smashed our mouths together.

I kissed him with everything I had and whimpered when he added a second finger and started teasing my aching bud as he worked me slowly. The knot in my stomach tightened and I pressed harder into his hand as his fingers started going faster. I was so close. I broke off our kiss and tilted my head back as I rode his hand. Just before I went crashing over the edge, his hand was gone and my head snapped forward.

“Wha—” I broke off when I saw that devilish grin again. “You—I—why . . . stop teasing me!”

“Woman, I’m nowhere near done teasing you,” he said softly, and pressed his lips to mine.

I wanted it rough. I wanted his hand back on me,
in
me. And he was smiling at me like he knew I was seconds from screaming in frustration and kissing me soft as a feather.

“Enjoy that frustration for a bit.” He spoke around my lips and kissed me once before lifting me off him and standing up.

“What . . . just . . . what?!”

With a wink, he turned and walked into Mason’s room. I was going to kill him. Or cry. I couldn’t decide which. I knew as soon as my aggravation died down I was going to be mortified that I’d been that bold with him, and he’d spent countless minutes teasing me before finally giving me what I wanted, only to stop before it got to the best part. And why was he in Mason’s room?!

Shakily getting to my feet, I swallowed the rejection that had just hit me and turned toward Kash’s room to put some more clothes on. I didn’t care if Mason and Candice kept it up all night; I’d rather have sat in front of my apartment than let Kash know how much he’d just crushed me. Before I made it to his door, his arms were suddenly on me, turning me around and pushing me up against the wall. His mouth slammed down on mine and he pressed his hips into me. His hard-on against my stomach had my knees going weak again. But before I could get lost in the feelings he stirred up in me, I pushed against his chest and turned my head.

“Kash—”

“You want to see what a little frustration will do?” he asked huskily as his fingers trailed against me before he slid two back inside me.

I moaned and my back arched off the wall as my body instantly reacted to his touch. The knot and heat were back and stronger than before, and I couldn’t talk anymore. I could hardly think, only feel. In less than a minute he had me right back to where I’d been on the couch, my body tensed, and I felt like I was suspended in air for torturous seconds before everything in me shattered and I couldn’t help the loud moan that escaped me.

Kash’s mouth was back on mine, swallowing my moans as he continued to work me through the most earth-shattering orgasm I’d ever experienced. My knees gave out and he caught me before I could crumple to the floor. Slowly, he pulled his fingers out of me and let them trail back against me; a whimper sounded in my throat when they ran across my overly sensitive area.

I took in a shaky breath and face-planted into his chest.
Frustrated orgasms. Best. Ever.

He laughed out loud and the sound warmed my body. “C’mon, Rach.” As he lifted me into his arms, I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist and let him walk me toward his bed. When he set me down, he brought my head back, pushed some hair behind my ear, and cupped my cheek. My hands reached for the button on his low-slung jeans but he twisted away from me. “Don’t pout, woman.” Kissing my lips once, he pulled back again and looked me in the eye. “Tell me what’s going on with us, what you’re wanting, because I—Rachel, if we do this . . . I’m all in. I want all of you . . .
need
all of you. I won’t do what Candice and Mason are doing. If that’s what you want, I’m sorry, but I can’t give that to you.”

A huge smile spread across my face. “Logan,” I whispered, and loved the way his gray eyes turned to molten silver when I used his first name like this. Taking the hand that was holding my cheek, I placed it on my chest and just sat there staring at him for a while. “No one has ever made me feel like my heart is flying away but still holding me to this earth. No one has ever made me feel so at peace and crazy with one look. No one has ever made me feel so in love and terrified at the same time. No one until you.” I kissed his shocked face and rested my forehead against his, our eyes locked on each other. “Trust me when I say, I’m completely yours.”

“You love me.” It wasn’t a question, but I nodded my head anyway. “I want to hear you say it.”

“I love you, Logan,” I whispered, and had barely gotten his name out when his mouth was on mine and he was lowering my body onto the bed.

“Rachel, I can’t begin to explain how in love with you I am.” He spoke through our kiss, and I swear my heart was about to burst.

He slid me closer to the edge of the bed and slowly pulled his shirt off me. His breath caught and he lowered me onto the bed as he shamelessly took in my completely naked body. Heat rushed up my chest and to my cheeks, my legs tried to close even though they were still wrapped around him, and my arms came up to my chest. It was one thing to not have anything under the shirt, but that had been like another shield to hide behind. And now that shield was gone too.

Kash’s eyes burned as he removed my arms, placing them gently on the bed, and opened my legs back up. “You’re so damn beautiful,” he whispered, and looked back into my eyes. “Please don’t cover yourself with me.”

My eyelids fluttered shut when his hands began their slow exploration of my body, and I had to force them back open so I could watch him. He sucked on his lip ring and looked up at me through hooded eyelids, and my body began burning for him. Sitting up quickly, I grabbed the back of his neck and brought his face to mine. Our kiss was slow and teasing, with soft bites and unhurried tongue strokes. I reached for the bottom of his shirt; he helped me get it off and I let my fingertips trail down his toned chest and stomach. I broke off the kiss to watch the path my hands were taking and only glanced at him for a moment when I began unbuttoning his low-slung jeans.

His erection was straining against the zipper, and my eyes widened when I pulled the denim off his hips and the only thing hiding him was a pair of boxer-briefs. I ran my hand over him and was rewarded with a low sound of pleasure in his throat. Letting the tips of my fingers run along the inside of the briefs’ band before pulling them lower, I bit my lip to hide my smile when his body shuddered. I grabbed his length in my hands and ran them slowly up and down, placed two openmouthed kisses on his chest, and looked up at him. He was breathing heavily, his mouth slightly open, and there was no doubting the look in his eyes.

“Do you . . .” I trailed off, the blush returning at my minimal experience with this.

Kash seemed to understand as he grabbed at the jeans hanging on his thighs and took a couple foil packets out of the pocket. “Mason’s good for something, I guess.”

I laughed and continued to work him with one hand as I pushed his pants and boxer-briefs off the rest of the way. He tilted my head up with his hands around my face, his thumbs brushing my jaw, and kissed me deeply.

“Rachel,” he whispered against my lips before pulling back an inch to look into my eyes, “can I have you?”

A lump formed in my throat when I realized what he was asking. I’d already told him I was his, but that wasn’t what this was. He knew about Daniel and the situation with Blake. One pushing, the other taking. Kash was asking. I nodded and squeezed my eyes tightly shut as I kissed him hard.

Pushing me farther back on the bed, he stepped out of his pants and tore open one of the foil packets. I watched as he rolled the condom on and reached for him when he finished. He grabbed the outstretched hand, kissed my palm, and intertwined our fingers as he crawled onto the bed and over me. I lay back and let him pull me up higher. When his lips found my throat, I wrapped my legs around his body and whimpered when his length pressed against me. He rolled his hips against me and I thought I would go mad if I didn’t have him soon.

“Please, I don’t want to wait anymore.”

He leaned back and positioned himself at my entrance. The hand holding mine gripped tighter and his eyes locked on mine as he slowly pushed inside of me. A breathy moan left me and he groaned as I stretched around him. Kash didn’t move for a few moments as we just felt each other. And with that lazy smile I loved, he pulled almost completely out and pushed back in harder. His name left my mouth and I brought his body down toward mine to capture his lips. Our joined hands were now pinned to the bed, his long fingers still entwined with mine and now clutching the comforter in them as well as we moved together. His other hand was in my hair, and his elbow was pressing into the mattress to keep his weight off me and give him the leverage he needed to move completely, but slowly, inside me.

My body was on fire for him, the heat in my belly growing rapidly. Our breaths were labored and our kisses were changing from slow and passionate to rough and needy. I urged him to move faster as I felt the familiar tightening low in my stomach and cried out when he leaned away and slammed into me. The heat in his eyes held me captive, and I’d never felt as beautiful or wanted as I did right now, in this moment with him. The hand that had been in my hair moved down my body, and the second his fingers rolled around my sensitive bud, my body shattered around him and I roughly whispered his name as I lost myself to him. He worked me through my orgasm, and when my body felt limp and sated, he curled back over me and placed his head in the crook of my neck. With a few more thrusts, his entire body tensed before shuddering, and he bit down on my collarbone as he groaned out his release.

His body was gently shaking when he pushed himself up, and I wrapped my arms around his broad back, bringing him closer to me. His arms gave out and I welcomed his weight for the moment before he rolled us onto our sides. Placing a soft kiss where he’d bitten down, he looked up at me and claimed my mouth next. We lay there holding each other for a few moments; the only sound was our heavy breathing as we stared into each other’s eyes. A soft whimper escaped my lips when his body left mine, and he kissed me quickly on the forehead before rolling off the bed and walking into the bathroom. He smiled when he came back in and saw me under the covers.

“I love seeing you there,” Kash said roughly as he crawled in with me. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me close to him. “Are you okay after that?”

I snuggled in closer to his hard chest and sighed happily. “Much better than okay. I—” I broke off and kissed his warm skin.

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