Four Times the Trouble (17 page)

“So why do you sound so sad, honey?” Grace asked.

Michelle shrugged, then realized her mother couldn’t see her. She dried her eyes. “I called him last night, you know, to talk about things—seeing as we do have to work together. The girls’ babysitter said he was out—with Ellen.” She wasn’t going to cry about it again. She wasn’t.

There was a long pause on the line. “You may have to accept that he’s made his choice,” Grace said gently.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry, honey. So sorry.”

“Yeah, me, too…”

Grace invited Michelle over for dinner, but Michelle declined, preferring to lick her wounds in private. She and Grace talked awhile longer, her mother telling her that Amanda Blake had found a job in a day-care center so she could support her daughter and still be with her all day. Michelle was happy for the young woman, if a bit envious, and even more pleased for the baby who was going to have a fair shake at life, after all. She was proud of the work her mother did and told her so.

She’d just hung up the phone when it rang again.

“I’ve been trying to get you for over half an hour.” Jacob’s voice was disgruntled. Michelle’s heart sped up in spite of herself.

“I was talking to my mother and my cell’s dead. I forgot to charge it last night. What’s up?”

“I need your help. You’ve already done so much and I’m a heel to ask, but I don’t know who else to call.”

Michelle frowned, immediately concerned. He sounded exhausted. “What’s wrong?”

“The girls have colds and poison ivy.”

“All three of them?”

“Yeah. All three. Allie started in the middle of the night, Jessie woke up sneezing and itching around seven, and by noon, Meggie was complaining of a sore throat, too. They’re all running fevers, they’re itchy and cranky, and…”

“I’m on my way,” Michelle said, hanging up the phone.

She fed Noby and sped out the door, a smile on her face. He needed her. Not Ellen. She reminded herself all the way out to the beach that Jacob’s choice was the only logical one—she’d been around so much lately the girls would be more comfortable with her than with the mother they hadn’t seen in years. But by the time she arrived at the cottage she still hadn’t managed to convince herself that there wasn’t something significant in Jacob’s plea for help.

* * *

M
AN
,
SHE
’
S
BEAUTIFUL
. Jacob stood in the doorway of the cottage and stared at Michelle, only then realizing just how much he’d missed her.

“Can I come in?” she asked, a shy smile curving her lips.

“Of course. Sorry,” Jacob said, stepping aside. She smelled like California sunshine and fresh air.

“Where are they?” she asked, looking around the living room, avoiding his gaze.

“In the bedroom.” He wondered if she’d been thinking about him as much as he’d been thinking about her.

“Daddy?” Meggie’s voice trailed weakly down the hall. Michelle looked relieved as she glanced toward the sound.

“Coming, punkin,” he called back. He and Michelle headed down the hall together.

“Allie and Jessie are sleeping, but I just promised Meggie a soak in the tub. They’re all three due for Tylenol again in another hour,” he said softly. Even if she wouldn’t look him in the eye, he was glad she was here.

She paused just outside the girls’ bedroom door.

“Why don’t you try to get some rest now, and I’ll see to Meggie.”

“If you’re sure…”

She pushed him toward his room. “Go,” she said, and went in to cluck over Meggie.

He heard his recalcitrant daughter’s happy greeting as he shut his bedroom door behind him.

* * *

T
O
SAY
THE
NEXT
twenty-four hours were grueling was an understatement. Michelle called Bob Chaney Sunday afternoon while Jacob slept and arranged to have the weekend morning announcer cover for Jacob and her until further notice. She let Bob draw his own conclusions about her presence at the triplets’ sickbeds.

Jessie and Allie were both awake and fussy by the time Michelle got Meggie tucked back into bed after her bath, but they were happy to see her, too. Michelle anointed and fetched, rubbed vapor rub and calamine lotion, held tiggues for nose blows, and read stories. And as much as it bothered her to see the girls so miserable, she was delighted to be able to care for them. It felt wonderful to be needed again.

Jacob finally awoke late that evening. All three girls were asleep for the moment, Jessie in Michelle’s arms.

“Want me to take her?” he whispered, walking into the bedroom.

Michelle wanted to hold the little girl forever, but her arms were numb and she needed something to drink. She nodded, feeling chilled as Jacob lifted his daughter away from her and laid Jessie gently in her bed.

He followed Michelle into the hall. “Thanks for the rest,” he said.

She glanced up at him. He’d obviously had a shower—his hair was still wet. “I’m glad you could sleep,” she said, wishing she could touch him.

He trailed her into the kitchen, helping himself to a cup of coffee from the warm pot on the counter. “Did the girls eat?”

She poured herself a diet soda. “Some. They wanted macaroni and cheese, but no one had much of an appetite once it was cooked.”

They sat down at the table together quietly, the intimacy of their situation wrapping around them. Now was the time when mothers and fathers shared a tired but still loving kiss. Michelle wondered why she continued to torment herself with images of things she might never have.

“I called Bob,” she said. “Rhonda’s covering for us.”

“I forgot all about work tomorrow,” Jacob said, his brow creasing, making him look even more handsome, if that was possible. “I suppose you’re about ready to head home.”

“I can stay a little while longer. They’ll need Tylenol again in another half an hour, and once they’re awake they’re probably going to need lotion, and nose blowing, and food, too.”

Jacob grinned. “Tell me about it,” he said, and then grew serious again. “Have you checked their fevers? I forgot to tell you the thermometer’s in the bathroom cabinet.”

“I found it. Allie’s has dropped to 101, but Jessie’s and Meggie’s are both hovering around 102.”

Jacob nodded and took a sip of his coffee. “They’ll probably be a lot more comfortable once their fevers break.”

Michelle grimaced. “I hope so. I’ve never had poison ivy, but colds can be horrible. I hope they miss the cough stage.” Sitting there with him, close enough to touch, was harder than she would’ve believed. She wondered if they were ever going to talk about their argument, and about Ellen, but before she could broach the subject, he drained his coffee cup and stood up.

“Let’s get this done,” he said. “The sooner they’re awake, the sooner they’ll go back to sleep.”

He reached into the refrigerator for a bottle of apple juice, and Michelle took three plastic cups from the cupboard. She’d learned the last go-round that the triplets would only take their medicine with an apple juice chaser. She followed Jacob down the hall a couple of minutes later, careful not to spill any of the juice she carried. Waking the girls, they gave them their Tylenol, rubbed lotion on them and had them settled back into bed, if not back asleep, within twenty minutes. Even when they weren’t on the air she and Jacob worked together like naturals.

* * *

M
ICHELLE
ENDED
UP
spending the night, taking a turn in Jacob’s bed while he crashed on the couch for the couple of hours all three girls slept. And though she fell asleep almost as soon as her head hit his pillow, Michelle’s dreams were all about Jacob. Waking up, she was hit with a wave of love so strong she actually considered telling him her feelings.

But she didn’t. If she was going to tell Jacob, it would only be when she was sure Brian was out of her life—one way or another.

The girls’ fevers broke on Monday, but things didn’t get any easier. They were uncomfortable and groggy and couldn’t get comfortable.

Michelle had finally coaxed them all onto Meggie’s bed to play a game of Candyland when the telephone rang.

“I’ll get it,” Jacob said, abandoning his role of kibitzer.

Michelle wondered if it was Bob calling from the station. Rhonda’s husband, a pilot, was due to fly in unexpectedly sometime that night, which meant that Michelle might have to go into work in the morning—she glanced down at her watch—just a little over eight hours from now. She sure hoped not. Leaving the girls to their game, she followed Jacob out to the telephone.

“I just don’t think tomorrow’s a good time. They’ve been sick for two days, and I’m not sure we’re through the worst of it,” she heard him say. He was looking out the living room window. He hadn’t seen her yet.

“I appreciate your concern, Ellen, but I’m not sure this is a good time for your first visit. You know how you hate sickrooms.”

Ellen.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

M
ICHELLE
FELT
THE
BLOOD
drain from her face. Somehow over the past twenty-four hours she’d started to believe that Ellen wasn’t a threat.

“I
do
believe you’ve changed. I’d just feel better if the girls weren’t at their worst the first time you see them.” He sounded tired.

Michelle stood frozen in the doorway.

“Okay. If you insist. But on one condition.”

He’s agreeing? With me right here in his home? He’s going to let that woman just walk in and take my place?
Michelle panicked as another thought occurred to her.
Will the girls be just as willing to replace her?
Fear raced through her, making it hard to breathe.

“I don’t want them given any indication this might be permanent. As far as the girls are concerned you’re just in town on a visit and want to see them.” He was going to give in to her. After all that woman had done to those children he was letting her come back to them.

“All right. Ten o’clock’ll be fine. See you in the morning.”

Jacob hung up, turned and saw Michelle. She hoped she didn’t look as upset as she felt. She had to get through this, and then go home where she belonged.

“I didn’t know you were there,” he said, looking like a child caught with a hand in the cookie jar.

“I thought it might have been Bob.”
Go home now. There’s no more reason for you to stay.

“That was Ellen,” he said, watching her. She hoped it wasn’t pity she saw in his eyes. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel sorry for her.

She folded her arms. “She wants to see them now?”

He nodded. That was all.

Something inside her wouldn’t let her leave it alone. “And you’re going to let her?” She hadn’t meant to sound so accusing, but how could he do this to her? She’d just spent two days caring for those girls as if they were her own. Without even talking to her, he was going to resume his relationship with that other woman?

“She’s their mother, Michelle.”

“She lost the right to that title when she deserted them.”

“She’s changed since then, grown up.”

So now he’s defending her.
“Maybe.”

“I won’t ever know if I don’t give her a chance.”

“I thought you wanted to protect the girls.” Even she knew she was being unfair. She’d heard his conditions for the visit.

“They aren’t going to know we’re considering making this permanent.” That was the second time she’d heard that word.
Permanent.

Michelle felt cold all over. She welcomed the sensation, knowing from experience that numbness would follow. So Jacob and Ellen were considering making it permanent. Not that Michelle had any right to blame him. She might have put Brian’s things away, but didn’t he still have a stranglehold on her heart?

“You love her, then?” She didn’t know why she was torturing herself, but she couldn’t help asking.

He turned around, facing the window. “She’s a beautiful woman,” he said.

“So you do love her.”

“I enjoy her company.”

“But are you in love with her?” Michelle asked harshly, having reached the end of her tether. It was time to go home to Noby.

She was unprepared for Jacob’s response. He swung around, his face taut with anger. “No! I’m not in love with her. How can I be when I’m in love with you?”

“Then why…” She couldn’t finish the question. She just stood there, staring at him, filled with an equal mix of wonder and fear.

“Because my children need a mother and she’s willing to try to be one for them.”

“And I’m not?”
The man has just said he loves you.
She willed herself to be calm. To try to understand. “What’s this been, then? A holiday?”

“You’re wonderful with the kids, Michelle. We both know that. But the girls and I are a package deal.”

He was only across the room from her, but she felt as if there was a world between them. “What about what’s going on with us? When we kiss—”

Michelle’s heart sped up as she watched him move toward her. She wanted him—needed him—to hold her. But she was so afraid to love him that she was choking on her fear.

He reached out to her, but instead of taking her in his arms, he grabbed her left hand and held it up.

“And what’s this? A friendship ring?” he asked. “I can’t share you, Michelle. I’m not that giving a person.”

Tears filled her eyes as she looked at her wedding band. She wanted to pull it off, to be free of five years of anguish. She wanted to walk into Jacob’s arms unencumbered and whole. But she wasn’t whole. She’d loved before with all her heart. And she was terrified to risk loving that way again.

Jacob dropped her hand and turned away.

* * *

“C
OME
ON
,
YOU
GUYS
, hurry up.” Meggie stood in the door of the bedroom she shared with her sisters, wondering why it always took Jessie so long to tie her tennis shoes and why Allie always had to make it take even longer by helping. Daddy was driving them to Michelle’s for the afternoon, and Meggie was sure she was going to die if she didn’t get there soon. She’d figured it all out in the middle of the night when her eyes wouldn’t stay closed even when she told them to. She had to talk to Michelle.

“Hey, you guys, don’t tell Michelle about Mommy, okay?” she said as an afterthought. She didn’t want to have to ask Michelle in front of them. Just in case.

Jessie looked up from her tennis shoe. “Why not? She always wants to hear about everything that happens to us.”

“You don’t want to hurt her feelings, do ya?” Allie asked, tugging on Jessie’s foot.

Meggie was glad Allie had the answer. Allie always knew what to say.

Allie finished with Jessie’s shoe, and it looked kind of loose to Meggie. It probably wasn’t going to stay tied very long, but Meggie wasn’t going to say anything about it now. They had to go.

“Do you think we should bring a game or something?” Allie asked, staring at the shelves filled with toys and puzzles and games in their closet.

“’Course not. Michelle’ll have stuff,” Meggie said, afraid Allie would take forever deciding what to bring. Meggie didn’t know if Michelle had anything to do over at her house or not, but she didn’t care. She just had to get there. There was something she had to know.

“I’m bringing the pet shop,” Jessie said, pulling down the case filled with plastic miniatures.

“Okay, and I’ll bring the travel desk,” Allie said, lugging it from its corner in the closet.

Maybe it was a good idea for her sisters to bring stuff, ’cause then Meggie could have some time alone with Michelle. Besides, they’d decided quick. “Okay, let’s go.”

Jessie stood by the closet door. “Aren’t you bringing anything, Meggie?” she asked.

Meggie stomped her foot. “I’ll just play with yours,” she said, gritting her teeth so they’d know she was getting mad and start listening to her. “Now let’s
go.
” This was just as important for them as it was for her, even if they didn’t know it yet.

Meggie couldn’t wait to see Michelle. They’d been sick for two more days after Michelle left and then their mommy had been coming to visit, so Meggie hadn’t seen Michelle in days. But Michelle had called and talked to them every evening they were sick and afterward, too. And now she’d invited them over to spend the day with her because she’d promised them she would as soon as they were better. They still itched some, but Allie was the worst and even her bumps were almost all gone.

Daddy turned onto Michelle’s street and Meggie looked out the window. She wasn’t sure she’d know which house was Michelle’s because they all kind of looked alike on Michelle’s street, but she found it right away. It was the one with Michelle outside on the step.

Meggie waited just until Daddy turned off the car so she wouldn’t get yelled at, then she unbuckled her seat belt and scrambled out of the car. Jessie and Allie always got the first hugs, but today Meggie wanted the first one. Just for once.

“Hi, Michelle,” she called, heading up the walk. She felt a little funny just running up and hugging her. What if Michelle didn’t hug back? Or worse, what if she just patted Meggie on the back like Mommy did?

“Hi, sweetheart, how are you feeling?” Michelle asked. She didn’t even wait for Meggie to reach her. She came down the walk and grabbed Meggie right up.

“I’ve missed you,” she said softly, her breath tickling Meggie’s neck. Michelle squeezed so hard it almost hurt, but Meggie didn’t care. She was just glad that Michelle was hugging her.

“I’ve missed you, too,” Meggie said, even though she was kind of scared to say the words. And she had more to say. Right now, before she chickened out and before she didn’t have a chance with her sisters around.

“I need to tell you some stuff in private, okay?” She hoped Michelle would understand how important it was.

Michelle pulled away and looked at her kind of funnylike, but Meggie made herself stare right back even though it made her tummy cramp up like when she ate too much candy.

Then Michelle smiled. “I’ll make sure we have the time,” she said—just to Meggie, even though Allie and Jessie were running up the walk toward her.

It took a long time to get alone with Michelle because Allie and Jessie had missed Michelle an awful lot, too, probably as much as Meggie had. And, anyway, Meggie was hungry and Michelle had made sloppy joes, and Meggie wanted to play with Noby, too. But finally Michelle put on a movie of Bugs Bunny cartoons and gave them all cards to sew on. And as soon as Allie and Jessie were busy, she called Meggie to help her clean up in the kitchen. Michelle sure was smart. Allie and Jessie didn’t like dishes any more than Meggie did, so they’d stay right there in the living room where they didn’t have to help. If she’d called Meggie to her bedroom or something, her sisters probably would’ve wanted to come along.

Meggie’s tummy started to cramp up a little again as she dropped her sewing card, and she wished she hadn’t had seconds at lunch. She followed Michelle to the kitchen and forgot the words she’d rehearsed the night before. Michelle was an adult and she didn’t want to make her mad. Maybe she’d made a big mistake. Allie and Jessie laughed at something in the living room, and Meggie wished she was in there, too. The sewing cards were really neat.

Michelle turned around then and smiled—all warm and soft, just like she had when Meggie was so sick and itchy—and lifted Meggie up onto the counter, making her as big as Michelle so her neck didn’t get tired looking up. That’s what was so neat about Michelle. She was always doing that stuff, like she knew what it was like being seven.

“Okay, sweetie, what’s up?” Michelle asked, giving Meggie her full attention. Meggie wondered for the millionth time why Michelle wasn’t their mommy.

Meggie thought about what Allie said about hurting Michelle’s feelings. She didn’t know what she’d do if she made Michelle cry.

“Mommy’s here visiting us.” She said it real fast to get it over.

Michelle didn’t look like she was going to cry, but her eyes weren’t all smiley, either.

“I know, honey,” she said, surprising Meggie.

“You do?”

Michelle nodded. “Your daddy told me.”

“Oh.” Meggie hadn’t figured on that one.

“I’ll bet it was great to see her.”

Meggie didn’t know what she was supposed to say. If Daddy and Michelle were talking about Mommy, then Michelle might tell Daddy what Meggie said. But if she didn’t talk to Michelle, she would just go on being afraid. And she’d thought since that day Michelle had come and gotten them from school that she wouldn’t have to be afraid anymore.

Michelle put her hands on the counter on either side of Meggie’s legs. It made Meggie feel like Michelle was kind of holding her.

“Meggie? Isn’t it great to see your mother?” Michelle asked, looking at her like Ms. Wilson did when she’d better tell the truth.

Shrugging, Meggie stared down at Michelle’s hands.

“Is she nice to you?” Michelle asked.

Meggie nodded. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t make herself say the words she wanted to say.

Michelle lifted her chin. “So what’s the problem?”

“She likes Daddy better than us.” Meggie was surprised to hear her words come out, but she felt better when they did.

“Oh, honey, I’m sure she doesn’t. What makes you think that?”

Meggie had never even considered the idea that Michelle might not believe her. “She does, Michelle. Even Jessie knows it. She always sits by Daddy and talks to Daddy at the table, and she only smiles at us sometimes when we say something or when Daddy talks to us. And she mixes us up.”

“What does your daddy say about it?”

Finally Meggie was getting somewhere. She stared into Michelle’s eyes and talked real fast so she could get it all in. “Nothing. He prob’ly thinks we don’t know. But he’s in a bad mood a lot and me and Allie figure it’s because he’s stuck with us and maybe Mommy will go away again like she did last time and then he’ll be mad at us ’cause he has to stay with us. Allie and me talked about how we could maybe take care of ourselves ’cause I know how to make sandwiches and Allie ran the washer once when Daddy was sick, but we don’t think they’re allowed to let us stay alone, so I was wondering if, maybe, Mommy doesn’t want us, you do.”