Frigid Affair (7 page)

He shook his head, acting like I was way off on my assumption. “No. It’s nothing like that.”

My mind traveled to another reason for a serious conversation. He was obviously married, and I’d rather not know than to think I was part of his infidelities. I’d already suspected as much. I placed my finger over his lips. “It doesn’t matter. What happened is done. We had fun, and now it’s time to say goodbye.”

“Oh, I see.” He smirked. “I suppose it’s better this way. I guess I should hit the road, before they come looking for me. I don’t want them anywhere near you.”

It was weird, but I figured he was being protective of me and what we’d just shared. After looking down the mountain at the charred remains of my friend’s cabin, I smiled and reached over to catch his hand. “Thank you for saving my life, and giving me something to remember you by. It’s a shame this is your last day here. Do you want my number? I don’t have my phone on all the time, but I check the messages.”

“Yeah.”

I grabbed paper, seeming desperate, and jotted down my number for him to take. “Did you still need to use the phone? It’s probably got a good enough signal.”

“No. It’s too late. Don’t worry about it.” He stroked the side of my face. “I’m glad we met, Amantha. You suck at cards, but you’re pretty damn good at a lot of other things. It’s good to know you’re okay up on this mountain. If we never meet again, last night will be one I’ll never forget.”

“You really know how to leave a girl with a smile on her face.”

“It’s been a while since I’ve been able to feel like this. It’s going to take me a week to walk straight again, and I’m okay with it. I’ll never regret what we did. Maybe I was meant to save you from that fire. It would make this trip more fulfilling than you’ll ever know. Thank you. I wish life wasn’t so cruel to you.”

He leaned over to kiss me goodbye. “I hope we meet again.”

“Goodbye, Easton.”

I didn’t watch him leave. It wasn’t necessary. He had a life I wasn’t a part of. Out of the time I’d spent living on my own, I couldn’t remember ever feeling so content. Maybe I’d welcome him again the following year. Only time would tell if he’d show up on my doorstep asking for another go. For now, he was the best one-night-stand I’d ever experienced. If I was lucky, he’d return. If it happened, I wouldn’t waste time playing cards. No, we’d get right to it, because even mountain women need a good fucking.

Chapter 5

By the time
spring came around, and the ground thawed, I was making my first trip into town, including a stop at my doctors for my annual physical. Since I only made this trip once or twice it was important to get everything taken care. I had a huge list, which would require us to stay in town for two days; us being me and the dog.

My doctor was in her fifties, and one of the three who resided in the area. I’d picked her by luck, and appreciated her friendliness, especially when I didn’t know anyone. Moving away from everything I’d known hadn’t been easy for me. I had to find a doctor immediately so I could refill my antidepressants. She’d write me a prescription for six months, in which I’d have to pay the full amount because insurance wouldn’t allow me to fill such a large amount of pills at once.

I’d lived in Alaska for an entire year before weaning myself off of them, but remained a patient to make sure I was in good health. When you have a ton of time on your hands you tend to over exaggerate every symptom one might have.

This particular visit left me with some unexpected news.

I was five months pregnant and hadn’t even known it. Apparently, since the cold months cause locals to gain weight, I hadn’t paid much attention to my body changes. Each spring I’d get back to normal activities and lose the added pounds in no time at all.

“What do you mean I’m pregnant?” I asked the doctor as if I didn’t believe the results. “It’s impossible.”

She glanced down at the results for a second time. “Well, we did our normal blood workup that we always do, including a pregnancy test. It’s routine. I won’t know the results of the others until the lab sends them, but according to this you are pregnant. Are you sure this couldn’t be a mistake? We could test again.”

I sighed and looked down, unable to accept I could be carrying a child as a result of a one-night-stand. “Yeah, I think we need to retest.”

This time, the doctor drew the blood herself and had the vials sent off to the lab, just to appease me. Since I’d be in town for a couple of days, she’d hopefully have the results back in time to give me the news before we ventured back home.

I was a nervous wreck as I waited. I couldn’t get my ass in gear. Instead of stocking my truck with items we’d need, I stayed in bed at the hotel, praying for some kind of miracle to make this all a bad dream. On the second day I finally got up the nerve to pick up a test at the pharmacy. After gathering a few more items I knew were important, I paid and hurried back to the hotel where I could pee on a stick and see the future.

Two lines.

I grabbed the second test out of the box and forced a few more strands of urine out. Three minutes later the same two lines appeared. By this point I was freaking out, panicking, pacing around the room like a nut job. What the hell was I going to do with a baby? How would I raise a child on my own? Was it even possible?

One thing was for sure, I didn’t want to up and move again. I’d finally settled in a place where I felt normal again. This had to be a bump in the road. If anyone could figure out how to be a mother, I could. I’d have to. Like it or not, I was going to be this little child’s only means of life.

It took me several hours to stop crying. Even after, I had a few breakdowns resulting in feeling too sick to venture out into town. Our two-day trip turned into four, and even though I was already certain the results were true, I went back to the doctors to hear what I needed to do next.

She sent me to her associate, an OBGYN, who happened to be in the same office.

To determine the date I conceived, they did a sonogram. I watched in amazement as the screen lit up with something that didn’t at all look like a little peanut. The baby on this screen appeared to already have limbs. She immediately started doing measurements, while I tried to think of the date of the fire so I could solve the mystery for her.

“It was almost five months ago,” I managed to whisper. “It was only once.”

“And you’ve had no signs?”

“None. I’ve gained a few pounds, but I always do during the winter months because I’m cramped up in the cabin. I haven’t been sick. I take extra naps, but I chalked it up to being bored.”

“You’re lucky, Amantha. Some women experience severe morning sickness, fatigue, as well as other symptoms. Had you noticed you missed your periods?”

“No. I’ve never been regular. It’s not like I keep a calendar. When it happens I put on a pad and wait for it to end. I guess I was preoccupied, or just being stupid.”

“Would you like to know what you’re having?”

It was a simple question, but one I had to think about. Did I want to know? Did it make it more real for me? Was this putting me one step closer to being a mother? “Yes, please.”

“It’s a boy.” She pointed to an area between the two legs. “See right there.”

I didn’t know what I was looking at, but agreed anyway. “Yeah.”

“You’re too far along now for an abortion, but have you considered other options? Adoption perhaps?” She asked.

“No. I’d never give my own child away, or terminate the pregnancy, even if there was still time. Things happen for a reason, and like it or not, this is my future now.”

“I admire your courage. With that being said, you’re going to have to make a lot of changes with your life.”

When she said it my general practitioner came into the room. She saw the screen and placed her hands in her pockets as she took a look for herself. “Wow. Look at that little baby. Amantha, you’re halfway through your pregnancy.”

“Sorry I questioned you. I couldn’t come to terms with the news.”
“It’s okay. I gather it comes as quite a shock.”

“I was just explaining how she’s going to have to change her life,” the obstetrician said.

My regular doctor agreed. “She’s right. You’re going to need to start taking vitamins daily. We’ll need to do another blood workup to test for levels. If it’s okay with you, I’m going to ask you to stay a couple more days. We’ll run a glucose test, and monitor your blood pressure to rule out preeclampsia being a factor. I may send you home with a monitor. Since I might not be able to check you monthly we’ll do video chats where you can give me your vitals. This is where things will get tricky and could become life threatening. I urge you to find a place in town until you deliver, but if you can’t, we’ll have to make the best of the situation. You’ll have to prepare for the baby inside of your home. You’ll need certain items on hand, especially during the winter months. This pregnancy won’t be like we would normally want to treat. Because of your location, we’re going to have to rely on you to give us the information we need. If you know someone who could stay with you it would help greatly. I’d hate for something to happen and you not be able to contact us. With only four and a half months left to go, we’ll have to play it by ear to see if we can get you down the mountain to deliver. Normally I wouldn’t recommend flying, but we might not have a choice. I’ll make sure Jack is aware that you’re going to have an infant up at that cabin in case of any sort of emergency that would require an airplane ride. You’ll need to stay healthy. No overexerting yourself. I understand you do it all on your own, but you’re going to have to hire someone to help with the heavy lifting. You’re carrying something fragile, so being safe is the key to a healthy pregnancy and making it to full term. According to this, it looks like you’re going to be due around August or early September. Hopefully we can beat the weather. I’ll make sure you have a room at the hotel and notify them you’ll be receiving medical care while you’re here. If for any reason you experience problems, you’ll need to call Jack. We’ll do our best to get to you.”

“I get it. I remember when my mom was pregnant with my brother. She would have an appointment each month, and then as it got closer she had to go in each week. What do you think I should do? Maybe it would be better if I closed up my place and stayed in town before the first snow hits. I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m still in shock, to be honest. All I know is that I don’t want to deliver a child on my own.”

“If you did that you’d get the best care. In case of any emergency you’d be close to the hospital. I’m not trying to alarm you, Amantha. You may carry to term without problems. You’re healthy, and that helps, but you never know when you might trip or become ill.”

I hated thinking about leaving my house unattended, but I knew I had a limited amount of time to make a decision. “No. I think it’s best if I find a place to stay in town. I’ll have to make a trip up to the cabin to close up, but it’s not like anything is holding me there.”

“Good. I’m going to send you home with books. If you want, I can see if my husband would be willing to help you gather some of your things. Maybe you could rent one of the cabins.  It would give you and your pup some extra space instead of being cramped in a small hotel room.”

“Good idea. I’ll ask when I get back to the hotel. I know they own a couple they rent out. I stayed in one when I first came to look at properties. My neighbors stayed in them when they came to do repairs on the house that burned.”

“I know this isn’t the news you expected, but you’re making a smart decision. Things can happen during childbirth, even with the medical advances that have been made. It’s better to be safe than sorry.”

I agreed. This was my life. I had to do what was necessary. It was no longer just about me and the dog. We were adding to our family.

The moment the word entered my mind I thought about the ones I’d lost. For the first time in forever my heart had a reason to keep beating. I’d have a family again. This child would have my blood. He would love me the way no other would be able to.

I made it out into the parking lot before the tears came. While Ava hopped out of the truck to relieve herself, I bawled. So much was about to change. There was a ton to do before it happened.

I’d met the local hotel owners, Clark and June, when I’d first moved to Alaska, and stayed there until my cabin was ready to be occupied. It’s also where I’d picked up my puppy Ava.

She was such a little white puff ball at ten weeks old. I fell in love instantly, and knew she’d be the only companion I needed.

With a lot of time on my hands, I spent most of my days and evenings training her. She was the biggest help. Believe it or not, I’d trained her to help me carry things. She pulled a contraption I’d made to hold firewood across the property so it was easier to get into the cabin. She went wherever I went. She was my very best friend.

Ava and I stock-piled the back of the truck full of dog food and supplies to do maintenance around the cabin on the first day we were there. Afterwards, she played with her parents and siblings at the hotel the breeders owned. I always enjoyed seeing them together, like a family reunion they looked forward to.

As I sat down with the owner, June, I watched Ava in her glory. “So what’s up, Amantha?”

“I was wondering if I’d be able to rent out one of the cabins for the next several months.”

“Are you having some work done on the cabin?”

“Not exactly. I just found out I’m pregnant. The doctors think it would be best if I stayed in town until after I’ve delivered.”

“When are you due?”

“I’m five months along.” It wasn’t the exact answer, but she understood.

“I can put you in one of the larger ones. If you end up wanting to stay longer, just let us know. We’ll keep it off the books. We’ve never been at capacity with guests anyway.”

“You don’t have to do that. I’ll pay for the place.”

“You’re a local. You need a safe place, and I have the room. I insist.”

“Thanks June. I appreciate it. This is all so new to me. It hasn’t all sunk in yet.”

“I bet. Will the father be joining you?”

June was probably in her forties. She’d been married for a long time to one man. I wasn’t sure how she’d react to my one-night stand, but secrets around town didn’t really exist. “He was just a guy on a hunting trip.”

“So, you’re not in touch with him?”

“Not at all, but it’s okay. Really. It’s probably better this way.”

“I know this is a big change, Amantha,” my sort-of-friend stated. “It’s also a blessing, if you’ll allow it to be.”

I hunkered up a smile, even though inside I dreaded what would come next. I knew there were plenty of women who couldn’t conceive. I had to consider my situation to be some kind of miracle, and even though I couldn’t appreciate it at the moment, I knew in time it would change everything.