Frozen Hearts (8 page)

An odd feeling swept over me, like someone was watching me, but when I scanned the parking lot, nothing out of the ordinary caught my eye. It was probably the leftover symptoms of my hangover and everything else that happened. I'd been on emotional overdrive for way too long. I closed the door and shook it off as nothing.

Dix came out of his room and leered at me, licking his lips and making rude gestures with his hips. I rolled my eyes, but it was a good feeling to know he was okay with my choices. We walked to campus together, joking about how hung over and tired we both were.

"Is someone following us?" Dix asked. "I've seen that blue car three times since we left the apartment. Do you recognize it?"

"Don't think so, mister paranoid," I said. We watched as it turned down a side street. Dix shrugged and veered off for his class, telling me he would talk to me later today. The car passed me again, but it wasn't easy to find a parking space on campus, so it wasn't odd to see a car circling the streets. It disappeared down a side street and I let the throng of students heading to classes swallow me.

Classes were tedious and I was further behind with course work than I originally thought. Most teachers were forgiving but others frowned upon putting hockey above an education. I wanted to argue with them and tell them that I gave up millions of dollars to complete my education, but bit my tongue and agreed with them. Eventually, with a little groveling and a few smiles, they all gave me a few extra days to complete past assignments. Sleep was not going to be part of my itinerary for the next few weeks.

As I was racing out of the library, I thought I saw Cookie, but when I shouted his name, the person looked toward me and quickly ducked into a building. I wanted to believe I was mistaken but a few minutes later, I saw a couple other guys from the team, who nodded and hurried away before I could even open my mouth. My gut sank. I had a feeling the rumor mill was grinding away at my reputation.

Despite the dismal classes and friends ignoring me, there were a few bright spots during the day. Tyce sent me a couple texts and each time my phone buzzed, I felt like a girl getting a message from the cute boy she'd been secretly hoping would ask her to the prom. It made me feel goofy and I blushed from the roots of my hair down to my toes, which was embarrassing because all he texted was hello.

Dix met me for a late lunch where he informed me that he had secured ice time and we would be playing some pick-up hockey games in the coming days. By the look on his face, I could tell it would be useless to argue with him. I would end up on the ice one way or another. Maybe it would help blow off some of the pent up, nervous energy that was giving me leg tremors.

After my last class, I had the misfortune of running into Rochelle and her pack of friends. They circled Rochelle, protecting her from the sight of me, calling me a bunch of unsavory names then flipping me off as they moved away in a herd. I couldn't really blame them for their reaction. I had hurt their friend and it was nice that Rochelle had people that cared for her.

"Well, that was interesting," Arielle said, sneaking up behind me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked. "I thought you had to work today?"

"Already did. Now I'm looking for you," she said.

"You found me," I said.

"Let's go get something to eat," she said.

I sighed, because I knew she was going to pummel me with questions that I had no idea how to answer. I'd only been around Tyce for one day. I didn't really know how to define us yet or even if there was an actual us.

The restaurant she chose was quiet. She sipped her water and studied her menu, ignoring me completely. I glanced at my menu and kept one eye focused on her, waiting for her to spew a boatload of questions about what had happened with Tyce.

The waiter stopped and took her order. I pointed at something on the menu and the waiter scribbled it down and disappeared. Arielle waved down another waiter and asked for more water. I tapped my fingers on my leg, watching her every move. It didn't do any good. Arielle remained silent. I didn't understand women at all. Rochelle pulled this shit all the time. She always did the exact opposite from what I was expecting. If I expected her to shout, she was silent. If I expected her to be happy about something, she was pissed and made sure everyone around her knew that I was an idiot. Now when I thought Arielle was going to come out with guns blazing and light into me with a lecture about how to keep from hurting Tyce, she did nothing. Maybe she enjoyed watching me squirm.

When the waiter placed the food in front of us I snapped. "Arielle, you're driving me fucking nuts. Say what you need to say."

She took a deep breath. "You know, I had this whole speech planned about how crazy fast this was, but then I figured it was me who started it by tossing him in your face. I could lay into you for hurting him and demand to know what's on your agenda this time… all that shit… but for the first time in years, you both looked happy, and I'm not going to say anything to take away from that. Tyce is one of my best friends and you're my brother, I want this to work out between you two. I saw it in the way you looked at each other. I felt it in the room. It's still there. I don't think it ever left either of you."

I closed my eyes. "I never let it go. I just kept it hidden from everyone. It didn't matter who I was with, it was always only him."

"Don't fuck it up, Erik," she said. "Not a lot of people get a second chance."

"I'll try not to," I said honestly.

"So, have you two talked yet?" she asked.

"Not really, just a few texts today. I'm so far behind in my classes, but thanks for this, I needed a little distraction."

"I did too," she mumbled.

"I know you miss Marshy, Arielle," I said, placing a hand on her wrist.

"I do," she sighed. "And I'm glad you know about us now. It was a bitch hiding it from you."

"You didn't have to do that," I said.

She shrugged. "It was easier on everyone and the sneaking around was fun sometimes." She snickered and I was thankful that she didn't fill in the blanks. My mind was already doing a splendid job of creating awful x-rated scenarios.

"You were hiding a lot of things," I said.

"Agreed, but you were too," she said.

"So, what should we do about it?" I asked, praying that she would say forget about it and move forward.

"Nothing," she said. "It's in the past."

I grinned. I didn't understand her at all, but for once, I liked her idea. "I should get back. I have a ton of studying to do," I said.

"Are you seeing Tyce tonight?" she asked.

I wanted more than anything to see him again, but I was going to leave the puck in his possession. He would need to make the first move.

"Um, I don't know?" I said. "It sounded like he was buried in work too."

She nodded and that was the end of our conversation. The clink of dishes and the low murmur from the other restaurant patrons was the only noise at our table. Arielle didn't speak again until I opened the car door and got out.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow," Arielle said.

I nodded and walked around to the driver's side of the car, leaning into her window to give her a kiss on the cheek.

As I stepped back, the roar of an engine and squealing tires made me turn my head. A car raced into the parking lot, not slowing down as it came careening toward me. Arielle shoved at me and I dove out of the way, tumbling to the concrete, tearing holes in the knees of my jeans and ripping up my hands.

"What the fuck was that?" Arielle screamed as she jumped out of the car. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, dusting my pants off, watching as what looked like a blue car speed down the road. "Probably some drunk asshole."

She eyed me and ran a hand over the hood over her car. The driver of that other car better hope they hadn't done anything to her baby or they would have hell to pay. I wondered if she would be more upset if I got run over or if her car got dinged up. I wasn't about to ask.

"Fuck," she said. "Be careful, Erik." I waited for her to say more, but she shook her head and climbed back into her car. When Ariel pulled away, I swear I heard laughter in the distance.

Chapter 5

It was around midnight when I finally finished one of the papers I needed to have done for a class tomorrow. My head hurt, I was exhausted, and my body was shouting at me to sleep, but I couldn't get my mind to quiet down. It was on full speed ahead and Tyce was the main attraction. There had only been one short text early in the evening telling me he was busy studying for a test. I debated sending him one, but I didn't know what to say without sounding like I was whining. I really did miss him. I kept picking up my phone and staring at it, willing it ring or buzz with a new text. I suppose that was the main reason it took me three hours to write a ten-page paper. I finally stuffed my phone in my desk drawer.

About an hour later, there was a muffled buzz from inside the drawer. I pulled it open and dug around until I found my phone. It was a short text from Tyce. Actually, it was just one simple word, written in all capital letters. Goodnight. It would be a lie if I didn't admit that I was disappointed. I frowned, but then I noticed a small letter x, sitting alone, like he added it as an afterthought.

Sometimes my sister used Xs and Os at the end of her messages when she was being a smart ass. Rochelle had occasionally added an x at the end of her text, but it never made my stomach knot up or my heart bang so hard against my ribs that it felt like it would shatter my bones.

It was a silly code Tyce and I used to communicate our feelings when other people were around. He'd walk by my desk in school and mark my hand with an x. Before a game, we'd put a tiny x on our wrist or ankle or hipbones. Every time I saw that x, warm feelings curled in my chest. No one ever noticed the marks and if they did, they didn't ask any questions.

I touched my phone screen, staring at that stupid little letter. Did he mean it? There was no way I'd get any more work done or any sleep until I found out. I yanked on a pair of sweatpants, grabbed a jacket, yelled at Dix that I was leaving, and raced out the door. Just as I made it down the first step, I ran back inside, grabbed a black marker from the counter and shoved it in my pocket.

The sky was cloudy and dark with only the street lamps to light my way. The sound of footsteps on the pavement made me stop and scan the parking lot, but there was no one behind me. I put my hood up and headed toward Tyce's place. Tyce hadn't just entered his phone number when he put his information in my phone.

Several cars drove by me with loud music blaring and kids hanging out the windows. One car remained at the intersection, idling. Another car came up behind it and honked but the car in front didn't move. The car behind finally gave up and drove around the idling car. I crossed the street, cutting into an alley, picking up my pace. I shook my head and slowed down. My mind was way over stimulated.

Headlights lit up the darkness behind me as a car slowly crept down the alley. Someone shouted my name, but I didn't hang around to find out who was yelling at me. The moment I started to run, the driver floored the accelerator and the car came barreling down the alley toward me. The car neared and I scrambled over a fence, running through backyards and across several streets to get away from whoever was fucking trying to turn me into part of the pavement. By the time Tyce's building came into view, I was panting and more than a bit shook up.

I raced up the steps almost knocking over two people waiting for the door to open. It only took a few seconds for someone to buzz us in, but I couldn't help looking over my shoulder for that stupid car. As soon as the door opened, I slipped into the stairwell and leaned against the wall. There was no way I could write it off as mistaken identity. That car had been chasing after me, trying to run me down.

"This is fucked up," I muttered. I sat down on the stairs to try and calm down. Tyce didn't need to see me all freaked out, and I didn't want to explain to him what had happened.

The hall was empty and I stood in front of Tyce's door, wondering if I'd made the right decision or if he was going to think I was a raving lunatic. I finally knocked quietly, deciding that if no one answered the door in the next ten seconds, I was going back home. After eight seconds, the door swung open and a very disheveled, tired Tyce stood staring at me.

"Erik, what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry, I know it's late, but I needed," I mumbled and felt my cheeks heat. "Shit." This was beyond embarrassing. "Never mind, forget I was here."

"Erik," Tyce said. He wrapped his fingers around my wrist and dragged me into his apartment. "What's going on?"

He looked confused and concerned—and maybe a bit distressed. He probably thought I'd gone mental and right now, he was probably correct.

There was too much to take in and my brain felt like it was going to short circuit. Tyce was standing in front of me again. My world had been frozen until he came back, now everything was melting around me. Tyce, the boy I'd been in love with since I was sixteen years old was back in my life and I needed him so badly that if I didn't get him, I felt like I might die. It all sounded so fucking crazy and desperate that if I said the words out loud, Tyce would probably slam the door in my face and call my sister.

"Erik?" he said again and bit his lip.

"Don't let fear run your life," I muttered and launched into my confession. "You sent me a text and I tried to go to sleep but there was no way. My mind was going round and round, playing tricks on me. I just need to know, to make sure."

I really did sound a bit mental and definitely desperate. My hands were shaking and a painful heaviness settled in my chest.

"Make sure of what?"

"Uh," I stammered and scrubbed a hand through my hair. This wasn't the time to get freaked out. I clenched my jaw and reached into my jacket pocket, pulling out the marker. I reached for his hand, turned it over and drew a small x near the pulse point on his wrist. His eyes lit up and he shoved me against the wall, slamming the door shut before pressing his chest against mine. He licked his lips, leaving them glossy and wet and so distracting that my thoughts melted together. Desire raged through my veins. Five years of pent-up passion and want threatened to spill out and sweep me away.

"You remembered," he whispered.

"I remember everything," I gasped.

I wanted to devour him. My head bumped against the wall as he smashed his lips against mine. Our tongues curled together, sliding and tasting, fighting for dominance. He bit my lip and our teeth banged painfully. His fingers dug into my hips as he drove me hard against the wall thrusting his hips so his dick came in contact with mine. This was going to be over before we made it to his bedroom.

"Well, be still my beating heart," someone said. "You sneaky little shit, Tyce. You weren't lying. It really is the one and only Erik Fox. And here I thought you were just a fucking groupie."

Tyce groaned into my mouth then buried his face in my shoulder.

"Hi, Sam," Tyce said. "My nosy, fucking roommate. Sam, this is Erik. Erik, this is Sam."

"Er, hey, Sam," I said, peering over Tyce's shoulder so I could see who was speaking to me. A lanky guy with piercing green eyes and spiked dark hair stared back at me. He winked and disappeared into the kitchen. He returned carrying a glass of wine and a bag of Oreos.

"You are even more gorgeous up close and personal. Although your face is really fucked up," he said. His eyes drifted up and down my body and it made me feel stripped.

"Sam," Tyce sighed.

Sam laughed. "I'd be sighing too if I had him wrapped around me."

"Sam, please," Tyce pleaded. "Go away."

"Whatever, you're totally rude, Tyce. I'm trying to study and now I'm going to have to take a break and jack-off," he grumbled as he shifted his dick. "Or I could join you."

"Uh, no, I don't share well," Tyce said.

"Well," Sam huffed and headed back down the hall. "It's nice to see you're real, Erik Fox. I can't tell you the number of times he shouted your name in the middle of the night."

I raised an eyebrow and stifled a laugh as I watched two distinct red spots stain Tyce's cheeks. Tyce frowned at Sam and flipped him off. Sam returned the gesture before he slammed his bedroom door. Two seconds later, Tyce and I were wrapped around each other again. I gripped the back of Tyce's neck, keeping him in place as I tilted his head and dipped my tongue into his mouth. He rewarded me with a deep groan that vibrated into my chest.

"Bedroom?" I gasped out then froze. Maybe I was presuming something. I didn't want to push him further than he wanted to go.

"Sorry," I added quickly. "Too fast?"

"No, too fucking slow," Tyce said, shoving me through his bedroom door. He tugged at my jacket and I shrugged out of it, tossing it carelessly to the floor. Tyce pulled his t-shirt over his head and shimmied out of his shorts, standing in front of me in a pair of tight boxer briefs that left nothing to the imagination. The outline of his hard cock strained against the fabric where a small wet spot formed making me impossibly warm. The sensible voice in my head started asking question about slowing this all down, but when Tyce slid my sweats over my hips and kissed me, I was gone and that stupid little voice was nothing but a memory.

"Want you, need you," Tyce whimpered.

"Oh God, Tyce," I said. "It's always been you." Guilt filled my heart and I lowered my head. Tyce put a finger under my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. He wrapped his arms around my waist, holding tightly until I could barely breathe.

"Always have, always will," he muttered against my mouth and the words slithered down my body, making goosebumps erupt on my skin. He said it again and this time the words gripped my cock so tightly I thought I was going to come before I got to touch him. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but the words stuck in my throat. All I could do was stare awkwardly at him.

He touched my cheek. "Show me, Erik," he whispered.

"Fuck," I said and dropped to my knees, tugging his underwear down in one swift yank.

Tyce's eyes fell shut and he moaned the moment my fingers brushed against his hard cock. There was a drop of pre-cum leaking out of the tip and I couldn't help but swipe my tongue over it. Tyce's thighs shook and it felt like he was going to collapse into a heap on the floor. He steadied himself by placing a warm hand on top of my head. The small growling noises he made were driving me crazy and I started to wonder if I could come untouched. I was so hard it was uncomfortable, but I resisted touching myself because I wasn't ready for this to end.

I grasped the base of his cock and slid my mouth down over the head, focusing on his taste as more pre-cum dribbled down the side. Tyce shuddered again and I really started to wonder if he was going to be able to remain on his feet. My ability to unravel him with just a few licks made the heat rise and fill my body. He groaned and I took him deeper, sucking hard as I let him fill my mouth. My hand drifted to his balls, rolling them between my fingers until he was squirming.

"Erik, stop," he begged, tugging at my hair. "As much as I love your mouth on me, I don't want to come yet."

I let his cock slip from my mouth, looking up into the blue eyes of the beautiful guy standing over me. He took a few short breaths then turned around, bending at the waist, placing his elbows on the bed.

"Oh fuck," I said and quickly closed my eyes, sitting on my heels. He reached back and touched my knee.

"Drawer," he said, turning his head toward the small table next to his bed.

I nodded and moved carefully because I felt clumsy and so tightly wired I might snap. When I tugged on the drawer, it almost fell on the floor, but I managed to grab a condom and a small bottle of lube without destroying anything.

He watched as I dropped the packet on the bed by his elbow before he turned to me and smiled. I took several shallow breaths, placing my hands on his back, sliding them down over the swell of his ass and back up to his shoulders again.

"Always have, always will," I whispered as I popped the top on the bottle, letting the cool liquid drizzle into my open palm. I rested my cheek against his shoulder, enjoying the warmth of his skin. He shifted beneath me, breathing heavily as I let my hand drift down his crack. I reached around and grasped his cock, giving it a couple of tugs before moving my hand back to his firm ass. I stroked his flesh, finally letting my fingers slide into his crack again. I pressed against his hole, massaging and listening to him pant. He started to push back against me, rising to his hands. I closed my eyes and pushed the first finger in, pausing a few times before I was knuckle deep. I don't remember adding a second finger or a third. My heart was pounding so hard in my head that I couldn't hear anything until Tyce swore and shoved back against my hand.

"More, I need more," he said.

My fingers slipped out of him and I stared at the packet resting on the bed next to his arm. I reached out with a shaky hand, ripped the foil and tried to get the condom over my aching cock without doing something stupid. I slicked my cock with more lube and kissed the back of his neck as I lined myself up.

The sensation of sliding into Tyce was almost more than I could bear. I couldn't breathe properly and heat rose up through my body so fast I was sure I was going to come or pass out before I was fully seated in him. He groaned and shifted his hips, making me slide in deeper.

"Erik, please," he moaned, shoving his face into the bedding. He bent his leg forward, placing one knee on the bed. I gripped his hips and started a slow rhythm.

We were connected, and not just physically. He filled my heart and everything came into focus. In the five years we had spent apart, I had never let go of him. Moving me hundreds of miles away and removing him from my life hadn't dulled what I felt for him.

"Tyce," I whispered against his overheated skin.

"Fuck me," he pleaded. "I need to feel you. It's been so long since I've let myself feel anything."

A litany of groans fell from my lips as I grabbed hold of his shoulder with one hand, pushing hard into him. His body lurched forward, but he quickly regained his balance and shoved back. I pulled out and slammed back into him. Suddenly I was lost in a chorus of snapping hips, slapping skin, and loud ragged panting. Tyce cried out my name, threatening to bring on my orgasm much too quickly, so I slowed down, sliding out of him and settling my hands on his thighs. I leaned forward and rested my chest against his back, kissing his neck and shoulders. My hand found my cock and I squeezed the base, lined up, and pushed back into him. I wasn't going to last much longer.