Full Circle (3 page)

“Terrible
place.” The woman gave a small, almost imperceptible shudder.

“Why is
that?” Bella didn’t really want to engage the woman in conversation, but she
might as well hear what she had to say.

“It’s so
spread out. You have to have a car to get anywhere.”

“Oh.” Bella
hadn’t considered that when she’d impulsively bought her bus ticket, but it was
too late now.

“But there
are lots of lovely towns up and down the coast.” She fussed with her bag. “I
live in Van Nuys. My son is coming to get me.”

“Do you have
any suggestions?” Bella turned part way in her seat. “I mean for me...small
towns?”

The older
woman thought for a moment. “Santa Monica is nice; it’s not too far from Los
Angeles if you’re thinking of trying to get into the movie business.”

“Heavens no;
not me.”

The woman
tilted her head, gave her an appraising look. “I don’t know why not. You’re
quite attractive, you know.”

“I am?” Bella
pulled back. No one had ever called her attractive before. “Thank you, but I
don’t think that’s for me.”

“Good for
you. Got your feet planted firmly on the ground, then.”

“I hope so.”

The woman
fell silent and Bella realized she’d nodded off to sleep. As the bus drew
closer to Los Angeles, the reality of her situation started to sink in. It
would be shortly after noon when she arrived, and she had no place to stay. She
made another snap decision. If there was a connecting bus headed for Santa Monica,
she’d take it.

* * *

The Los
Angeles terminal was overwhelming, but a helpful ticket seller gave her
instructions on how to make the final connection. When she stepped off the bus in
Santa Monica, she gave silent thanks to the older woman who’d suggested that
she come here. Dizzy with fatigue, she studied the ads in the bus terminal, and
checked into an inexpensive motel a few blocks away. She didn’t even shower
before falling into bed.

* * *

Bella slept
for twelve hours and awoke feeling rested and confident. A different clerk was
on the desk and she approached him with a smile. “If you were looking for a
furnished apartment to rent, how would you go about it?” she asked.

He gave her a
quick once-over. “I’d probably check the ads in our local newspaper first.
Rental agencies can be expensive.” He handed her a map. “Here, you’ll need
this.”

Bella sat in
a sunny corner of a fast food restaurant and studied the newspaper. Several
studios were advertised, but they were too far from the center of town, and she
wanted to save every penny she could by walking. She was about to give up when
a small ad caught her eye. With trembling hands, she put a coin in the payphone
and waited for a response.

Ten minutes
later, she stood before a small single story home on a shaded side street. A
wide veranda faced toward the street, fronted by flowerbeds blooming with
riotous color. She opened the gate and walked tentatively up the steps. Before
she could knock, the door was flung open and a small, dark-skinned woman
greeted her warmly. She looked to be about five months pregnant.

“You must be Bella,”
she said, holding the door open. “I am Sofia. Sofia Alvarez.” Dark eyes looked
her over carefully. “You are looking for a rental?”

“Yes, I am.” Bella
said, taking in the impeccably clean house. “You said it was over the garage.”

Something
moved behind the woman’s eyes. “Yes, it used to be my husband’s hobby room.
Come, I show you.”

Sofia led her
up a set of outside stairs, opened the door and gestured for Bella to enter.

“This is
lovely!” Bella couldn’t believe her eyes as she explored the small space.
“Everything looks new.”

“You would be
the first tenant,” said Sofia proudly. “The construction was finished last
month, and I’ve been furnishing it slowly.”

“And you’re
sure you only want four hundred a month?”

Sofia nodded.
“It’s a small space, and from the right person, four hundred is enough.”

“Well, I’d
love to have it. When could I move in?”

“It’s ready
now. Why should you pay for a motel room any longer than necessary? Come, I’ll
get your details and give you the key.”

* * *

The small space
had been well thought out. The kitchen opened to a small living area, but it
was adequate for her needs. The bedroom was at the rear, and a small balcony
overlooked the back yard. Bella couldn’t believe her good fortune. She dragged
her suitcases up the stairs and unpacked quickly, eager to take possession.

After
unpacking, she explored the kitchen. It contained a set of dishes for four, as
well as basic utensils and a new set of pots and pans. She closed the cupboard
doors, leaned back against the counter and started a mental shopping list.

“There’s a
grocery store three blocks that way,” said Sofia, pointing the way. “You can
probably get everything you need there.” She hesitated, hand over her stomach.
“You are welcome to join me for dinner tonight. I was going to make quesadillas,
and it’s no trouble to make for two.”

Bella wasn’t
sure how to respond. “That’s really kind of you, but...”

“Please come.
It’s your first night, and I’d like to welcome you.”

“Okay, then.
I’d enjoy that.”

“Good, see
you around six.”

* * *

Bella walked
slowly to the grocery store. She would be careful about how much she spent, but
she had the added cushion of the money her father had given her before she left
home. Thinking of him now, a lump formed in her throat.

“I want you
to have this,” he’d said, catching her outside one day. It appeared that he was
fighting back tears. Bella was stunned; she’d never seen her father get
emotional before. He’d clutched clumsily at her hand, passing over some folded
bills. “Are you sure you’re going to be all right?”

“I’ll be
fine, Dad. Really.” She’d given him a quick kiss on the cheek and tucked the
money into her pocket. “And thank you. I’ll come back one day and make you
proud.”

He pulled her
into a quick, fierce embrace. “I know you will, Girlie. I know you will.” And
then he’d turned away, headed for his workshop in the garage.

Bella had
counted the money later that night. He’d given her twelve hundred dollars. It
was a lot of money for a family that didn’t have much to spare, and she vowed
silently that one day she would pay him back.

* * *

“Wow!” That
was great.” Bella stood up from the table and began to clear the dishes. “I’ve
had quesadillas in restaurants at home, but they were never this good.”

Sofia beamed
with pleasure at the compliment. “You don’t have to do that,” she said,
struggling to rise. “You’re supposed to be my guest.”

Bella glanced
pointedly at the other woman’s stomach. “It’s the least I can do. When are you
due?”

“December.”
Sofia made it to her feet. “Shall we sit out on the porch and have some iced
tea?”

Bella gave
her a stern look. “You just tell me where it is, and I’ll bring it out.” The
two women had chatted about inconsequential things during dinner, but a bond
had been formed, much to Bella’s delight.

“I guess
you’re wondering about my husband.” They’d settled at the end of the porch
where they were more likely to catch the evening breeze.

“I did
wonder, yes.”

Sofia looked
up at the rustling palms. “He was a policeman. We came up to Los Angeles from
Juarez, where he was in the drug squad.” She paused for a moment, lost in
thought. “He was part of a combined task force with the Los Angeles police.
They were closing in on one of the big drug importers, but somebody must have
tipped them off. There was a shootout, and my husband and two other officers
were killed.”

“I’m so
sorry.” Bella didn’t know what else to say. “I can’t imagine what that must
have been like.”

“No.” Sofia
was silent for a moment. “I still look up sometimes, thinking that I hear him
in the house. Even now it doesn’t seem real.”

“Do you think
about going home?”

The other
woman looked startled. “No. I can’t go back there. His cover was that he was
transferred to Guadalajara. You know, to protect his family. But I wouldn’t
want to go back even if I could.” She looked at Bella and smiled. “This is my
home now. I like it here and I have a good widow’s pension. It’s not a lot, but
the house is paid for.” She gave a shy smile. “The other officers on the squad
took care of hiring the workers to renovate your apartment. They have a special
fund that paid for the construction costs.”

Bella shook
her head. “And I thought I had it bad.” The words were out of her mouth before
she could stop them.

“You are
alone, yes?” Bella noticed how Sofia’s language slipped once in a while when
she was unsure of herself. It was charming.

“Yup. I came
as far as I could without leaving the lower forty-eight.”

Sofia took a
drink of iced tea. “Someday you will tell me about yourself. But I think not
tonight.”

Bella was
grateful for the other woman’s understanding. “Not tonight.”

They sat in
the gathering darkness, comfortable with each other.

After a few
minutes, Sofia spoke. “I suppose you’ll look for a job.”

Bella gave
her a faint smile. “I was just thinking about that. I don’t really have many
skills, but I’m confident that I’ll find something.”

And she did.
Within a week, she was working full time at a fabric store, with an evening
shift at a fast food outlet. Sofia waited up for her every night and they
shared a glass of iced tea while Bella told stories about the day’s customers. As
the months slipped by, they formed an unbreakable bond of friendship. And then
one night she came home to a strange car in the driveway. Every light in the
house was on, and she ran up the front steps.

She opened
her mouth to ask what was happening but was forestalled when she heard the cry
of a baby from the back bedroom. Sofia’s friend Consuela bustled out from the
bedroom. “Is a girl,” she announced, a broad smile on her face.

“And Sofia?”
asked Bella. “Is she all right?”

“She’s fine.
She say for you to come in when you get home.”

Bella paused
at the door to the bedroom. Soft light from the bedside lamp fell on her
friend. Sofia held her new daughter, eyes luminous with unshed tears. “Come,
look,” she said quietly. “She’s beautiful, no?”

“Hello
Valeria.” Bella knelt down beside the bed and looked up. Sofia nodded; she’d
finally settled on the name just a week ago. She reached out and stroked the
tiny hand with its perfect fingernails. “She’s beautiful,” she murmured.

Sofia’s eyes
remained focused on her daughter. “She has her father’s nose,” she said softly.
Her eyelids started to droop and she shook herself awake. “I’m getting tired,”
she said apologetically. “It’s been a long day.”

“How was it?”
The women had speculated about what childbirth might be like.

“Not too
bad.” Her eyes softened. “You’ll see.”

Bella pulled
back. “You know?”

Sofia reached
out a hand and stroked Bella’s cheek. “
Si
, I know. We can talk about it
later.”

* * *

“Our children
will grow up together.” The women were sitting on the front porch a few weeks
later, the cradle between them. It seemed to Bella that Valeria grew every day
while she was away at work. “That is if you stay here.”  The last was said
hopefully.

Bella brushed
a fly away from the baby. “That’s something I haven’t allowed myself to think
about too much,” she said. “I mean, I’ve thought about it, but I haven’t tried
to make any decisions.”

“Do you want
to go back to your town in Georgia?”

“No, not
really.” Bella picked up her iced tea and pressed the cool glass against her
forehead. “How would I explain coming home with a baby? That’s the reason I
left in the first place, so nobody would know I’m pregnant.” She placed a hand
over her stomach; it was becoming a familiar gesture.

“Does it make
you sad to think that you can’t go back?”

“I thought it
would, but it doesn’t.” Bella stopped to consider her reply. “My parents love
me, but we’re not what you’d call close.” She looked across at her friend. “Do
you come from a big family?”

Sofia’s face
softened and her gaze became distant. “
Si
. I have three sisters and two
brothers and they all have children. I miss them a lot, but they plan to visit
in a couple of months.”

Bella nodded.
“That’s the way it should be. I often wondered if things would be different if
I’d had a sister or a brother. When I was growing up, my mother never told me I
looked nice, or anything like that, and my Dad was kind of distant. I think I
miss my friend Carla more than my parents, but she’s moved to New York with her
boyfriend. So I guess California is my new home.”

“Have you
been to a doctor yet?”

“Yes. I went
to the clinic last week. She said I’m disgustingly healthy.” Bella tapped her
fingernails against the side of her glass. “I’m a bit concerned about the cost
of going into the hospital for the birth, though. What made you decide to do it
at home?”

Sofia
shrugged. “My mother was what you call a midwife. I never considered any other
way, even though I have medical coverage through Eduardo’s pension.”

“Do you think
I should try it?”

“You’d have
to make up your own mind about that, but Consuela is wonderful, and if she
thought anything was wrong, she would call for an ambulance.”

Bella
cringed. “That’s not going to happen, is it?”

“No, of
course not.”

* * *

Sofia was
right. The birth of Bella’s daughter took only a few hours, surprising even the
experienced midwife.

Bella held
her daughter to her chest. “I love you,” she said fiercely, kissing the tiny
face, hands and feet. “And I will make sure you know that every day of your
life.”