Authors: Crystal Perkins
Erin and Dave wanted to host my family graduation party. I brought
Amber, of course. Everyone had a great time and we laughed and drank
late into the night. Erin, Dave and Alex were leaving on a vacation
to Disneyland the next day and they gave me a key and the security
code to the house so that I could walk their dog. He didn’t like
the kennel and I offered to do it. I went home happy to have the love
of family and of Amber. I had invited her to come to my apartment a
couple of days later and I was planning on proposing to her. I went
back to Amber’s apartment with her that night and stayed again the
next night.
I woke up two days after the party happy until I realized that the
program that I had been working on was missing from my messenger bag.
I had put it in there so that I could go straight to work because I
needed to present it at a press conference. I started freaking out
because I needed to now run to my workroom at my parent’s house to
get the back up. This program was going to bring more money and
prestige to our company and part of the reason I chose that night to
let Amber into my home was that I was wanted to celebrate the
announcement of the program too.
Amber saw that I was stressed and offered to go to Erin’s house
and walk the dog. I was grateful to her and gave her the key and
alarm code. The press conference went well and I was on cloud nine
heading home with Amber’s favorite Chinese takeout that night. She
texted to tell me that she would be late. I was a little disappointed
but I told myself that at least she was coming over. I was letting
her into my heart and I knew that she would say yes. I was wrong.
While I was waiting at my apartment, Amber and her REAL boyfriend
were robbing Erin’s house. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Dave had
gotten food poisoning so they had come back to Chicago early. Alex
was dropped off at my parent’s house so that Erin could take care
of Dave. Erin and Dave came home in the middle of the robbery and
they were both shot dead by Amber. She didn’t get away, though. The
neighbors had seen her car in the driveway and knowing that Erin and
Dave were on vacation, they called the police.
When she was taken into custody, Amber admitted that her
relationship with me had all been a setup. She purposely walked in
front of me so that I would bump into her. She never liked video
games or Star Wars or me. I was just a means to an end to get close
to my family. The one time I saw her, she told me that my sister
begged for her life, but I’m hoping that she was lying. Like she
lied about so many other things.
That all took place nine months ago. I have been blaming myself
for being so stupid and causing my sister’s death. My brothers and
my parents have finally started breaking through to me. They told me
that I need to forgive myself and that I was a victim. I know this
but I’ve had a hard time believing it. I am starting to, though.
Because, I have a reason now to want to be happy. I have you.
At least I hope I still do. I want to shout from the rooftops or
jump on a couch to tell everyone that you are mine. But, I can’t.
My family told me that they didn’t really like Amber and although I
know that they like you, I can’t bring a girl home yet. It feels
too soon, like I haven’t mourned enough. I also hope you understand
now why I can’t let you into my house yet. I tried that once. I
know that you are not Amber, but like you said, we haven’t known
each other long. I want to trust you and I do to some extent, but I
can’t show you off or bring you home. I’m sorry, Yas. I know you
deserve better than this and really, better than me. But, I can’t
give it to you now. I want to keep exploring this thing between us
and I hope you do too.
I know I put a bunch of hope in this letter, but that is one of
the things I feel when I’m around you, hope. I know you may not be
ready to talk to me right after reading this but if you could text or
call me when you can, that would be great.
Yours,
Scott
Tears are rolling down
my cheeks as I finish the letter. I can’t believe what Scott—and
his family—had to go through. I ache for him while at the same time
I want to fly to Chicago and beat the shit out of that bitch, Amber.
How could she do that to him? No wonder he can’t trust me yet. Or
maybe ever. No, I won’t think that way. I would never use him and
he’ll see that.
I think hard about what I want to
say and then send the text.
Me: I understand and we can keep “us” quiet. Or at least as
quiet as we can. I think Alex and your dad might suspect that
something is going on with us. I am glad that you are realizing that
it was not your fault. You are an amazing man.
Almost immediately my phone buzzes.
Scott: Thank you, Yas. If my dad and Alex ask you about us,
tell them the truth. While I’m not ready to show you off, I don’t
want you to have to lie. You’re an amazing woman and I will try to
work this out as fast as I can.
Me: I know you will. Thanks for saying that I don’t have to
lie. It would be hard for me to lie to your family. I’ll see you
tonight?
Scott: Yeah, you will.
Me: OK, bye until later.
Scott: Bye.
Scott
Things have been going
great with Yasmin the last two weeks. I’ve stayed at her house
every night. Waking up with her in my arms is one of the best things
I’ve ever experienced. It is even better when I can convince her to
go into work late and stay in bed with me longer. I know keeping our
relationship from my family is bothering her, but she doesn’t say
anything. She’s trying to be patient, but I am going to have to man
up soon if I want to keep her. And I
do
want that.
It’s not just the
sex, although that is as incredible as ever. She is the hottest
fucking woman I have ever met and being with her is a gift. I know
she feels the same way about me since she touches and kisses me as
much as I touch and kiss her. We are insatiable and it totally rocks.
But, it’s our talks
that make me feel like she is capturing my heart, piece by piece. We
talk about everything but work when we’re together. Other than Star
Wars and Star Trek, we don’t really have any common interests, but
that seems to make us better. We go to the gym together a few times a
week. She does some cardio while I lift and then we jog the indoor
track together. She thought that she was out of shape, but she holds
her own. Lifting all of those books must keep her in better shape
than she thought.
I explain video games
to her. I bought her a PS4 and she’s started playing it with me.
She talks to me about books and some of the YA ones sound
interesting. I am starting to understand what people mean when they
say that someone “completes” them. We are like two halves of a
whole. I’m falling in love with her and, surprisingly, it doesn’t
scare me.
Tonight is going to be
different for us. Alex invited her to a special dinner where we’re
going to celebrate Erin’s birthday and she said that she didn’t
want to say no to her. Yas gave her the idea, telling Alex that she
does it for her parents too. Alex has been so excited and she’s
been doing so much better. I am still not ready to tell everyone that
we are together and I know it will be torture to be near her and not
touch her. I am going to need to sit as far away from her as possible
to maintain control.
* * *
Yasmin
I arrive at Maggie and
Gary’s house with Alex. I’ve seen everyone briefly when they drop
off Alex at the store, but I haven’t been back to the house in a
couple of weeks.
“Yasmin! It’s great
to see you!” Maggie envelops me in a hug as we step out onto the
back patio, which is full of balloons and streamers. Gary, Ryan, Owen
and Luke all come over to hug me as well. Only Scott stays away from
me. It hurts. I’m not going to lie. But, I told him that I would be
patient and I‘m trying.
“We have all of Mom’s
favorite foods, just like you suggested, Yasmin. See, there is cheese
pizza, mini spinach and mushroom omelets, Grandma’s mac and cheese
and fried chicken too. We have red velvet cake for dessert.”
“It all looks
amazing. Thank you for letting me be here with you.” I give Alex a
big hug and feel my phone vibrate in my pocket.
I take it out to check the text as
we sit down.
Scott: Thank you for helping her, Yas.
I look up hoping to see
Scott across from me, but he’s at the other end of the table. As
far away from me as he can possibly get. I take some deep breaths to
stop myself from crying. I agreed to this. And he has been wonderful
to me. We talk and laugh when we’re not kissing or making love. I
don’t know if he thinks of it as making love, but I feel like it’s
more than sex or fucking. He’s still giving me random pens every
few days and writing me letters. I could say that I am falling in
love with him, but deep down I know that I have already fallen. I
just need to stay strong and give him the time that he needs.
The dinner is great and
everyone goes around the table telling their favorite stories or
saying what they are thankful to Erin for. When they get to me, I
tell them honestly that I am thankful to Erin for Alex. I’ve come
to love her like my own niece and she’s told me that she loves me
too. I hope that we will always stay in touch, no matter where she
goes for college or later in her life. She’s a special girl.
After the plates are
cleared from dinner, Gary comes back outside with an envelope in his
hand. He has a look of sadness in his eyes when he turns to Scott.
“Son, this came for you today. I didn’t want to spoil the
celebration but you need to make plans.”
“Plans?” Scott asks
him with a puzzled look as he takes the envelope from his father. His
eyes grow wide and his hands start to shake. “Is-is this what I
think it is?”
“Yes, Scott. Doug
called this afternoon to say that they moved up the trial to July 13.
He just found out and also heard that a subpoena for you was coming.
I know we hoped that this wasn’t going to happen, but the
prosecutor really wants your testimony. He thinks that it will help
take any sympathy away from Amber that her lawyer will try to drum
up,” Gary tells him as next to me, Alex sits up straighter and
reaches out to squeeze my hand. I look over to her and ask if she’s
okay. She tells me that she is, she just wants justice for her
parents. I nod.
I look up and see that
Scott has gone pale and started shaking his head. His body is
shaking. “No, I-I can’t. I can’t do it.”
I don’t even think as
I rise up and move around the table to the other side. I reach him,
saying, “Yes you can, Scott. You can do this.”
“Yasmin, I know that
you want to help Alex and you seem to have some grasp of the
situation, but you don’t fully understand,” Maggie tells me in a
kind but stern voice.
I ignore her and turn
back to Scott, forcing him to look up at me. “I’ll go with you if
you want me to.”
“Baby? You’ll go
with me?” When I nod, he reaches out to grab me around the waist
and pull me to him. His head is against my stomach as my hands move
into his hair and scratch his scalp the way he likes me to.
“Apparently Alex is
not the only one Yasmin has been helping.” I hear Gary say from
behind me. I look up and am met with some surprised faces. I give
them a small smile and start to turn back to Scott.
“I knew. They were
kissing against the bookshelves in the Horror section last week.”
At my look of shock, Alex continues, a look of mischief in her eyes.
“I know you thought that I was next door getting coffee with Sam,
but I forgot my wallet. I didn’t want to interrupt you. You looked
really into it.”
I blush deeply as Scott
starts shaking again, this time from laughter.” We
were
really into it so thanks for not interrupting, Baby Girl.” He takes
a few deep breaths and then looks up at me loosening his hold a
little. “What about the store? I know that you haven’t wanted to
take time off or even go in too late in the mornings.”
“Do you want me to go
with you?” I ask, looking down into his eyes.
“Yeah, I want you to
go. I fucking
need
you to go, Yas. I meant it when I told you that you comfort me.”
“Then I will figure
something out for the store,” I tell him, leaning down to lightly
kiss his lips. I try to lighten the mood a little by adding,
“Besides, I’ve never been to Chicago. Even if I only see the
inside of a courthouse and a hotel, I’ll be able to say that I was
there, right?”
Scott looks up at me.
“We could go a day early and I could show you around a little if
you want. We could even go to Windy City Tats so you can meet my
tattoo guy, Zane.” He smirks as he adds, “I know how much you
enjoy his work.”
I blush and playfully
swat him on the shoulder. “I
would
like that. I’ve always wanted to go and see the paintings at The
Art Institute. But are you sure it would be alright? This isn’t
going to be a fun trip for you.”
“It’s not going to
be fun. In fact, I think it will be my own personal version of Hell,
but I would really like to show you the city. I grew up there and I
love it, even if I can’t imagine ever going back there
permanently.”
“Well, it’s settled
then. I’ll arrange for you to fly out on the jet two nights before
the trial. Do you have a hotel chain preference, Yasmin?” Gary asks
me.
“Umm, no. I guess
whatever is cheap but nice. I can’t afford a fancy hotel,” I tell
him honestly, feeling a little embarrassed.
“We’re not staying
in a cheap hotel. Can you have us booked into the W, Dad?” Scott
asks, taking my hands in his.