Gemini (22 page)
- We sit there for a bit and then Jamie clears his throat. I r
- But he's not there. He's still standing behind the couch.
- "You were gonna leave."
- I look at him and Paul slides off my lap and sits on the flo
- "I wasn't thinking, Jamie. Was gonna go before I made you si
- "Who did you think it was?" His eyes. Oh fuck, his eyes are
- "I told you, I don't remember anything. Can't remember getti
- "Jamie thinks you figured one of us was screwing around," Pa
- Everything stops. Jamie looks at me and I can't tell what he
- "Fuck you." He turns and leaves, goes to the bedroom. Paul g
- I stay where I am.
- I can hear them. I can hear them yelling, Jamie swearing and
- It goes on for ages. I can hear them talking quietly for a l
- It feels really late when I wake up. It's still dark, and th
- Then there are arms lifting me, carrying me to the couch, an
- The next time I wake up it's almost morning. Jamie is sittin
- "I'm sorry," I whisper. "I never thought that. I didn't, Jam
- He shakes his head and says, "No. Not your fault. Nothing is
- I push myself up. "Not walking. Not running. Just ... just p
- He nods and leans forward, his forehead on mine. "I know it.
- I close my eyes and take a deep breath. "We okay?"
- He kisses me really softly. "We're okay. And you are, too. Y
- We sit there while the sun comes up, Jamie brushing my hair
- Paul comes out of the bedroom at seven thirty. He looks at u
- "Gent?"
- "Yeah, baby?"
- "What was the positive for?" He's looking like it damn near
- I shake my head. "Don't know. I deleted the message on the m
- They stare at me.
- "Okay," Jamie finally says. "Do you want to go retrieve it,
- I look at them and see that there's no way they're gonna let
- I listen to the message and grab a pencil, write down the nu
- Surrounded by my boys I can say it.
- "Hep C."
- Someone starts to shake and we all slide to the floor. No on
- I don't feel sick.
- Jamie finally gets up and then Paul. They drag me off the fl
- Paul makes a huge stack of toast and we all eat on the bed,
- Jamie answers it 'cause he's closest. He hands me the receiv
- "Hey Gent," I hear. "That Paul? Told you he'd stick close. W
- "Bar."
- "Yeah, I get that, I guess. They call yet?"
- "No."
- "Call me when they do, 'kay?" Then he's gone.
- I crawl off the bed and go into the bathroom. Didn't think t
- The next time the phone rings I answer.
- I listen and write shit down. Make an appointment for me and
- "Made appointments 'cause we need the reassurance. Too fucki
- "I'm okay. Really. They transposed some numbers. Not sure if
- I don't get any further. Jamie falls back on the bed and sta
- I call Fred later and tell him I'm taking the some time off,
- "Can't live on that, Gent." He sounds skeptical.
- "Don't intend to. Get another job somewhere. Just can't be w
- "You're damn good at what you do. Think about it, Gent. You
- "Yeah. I know. Just give me some time to work this out, okay
- Fred finally just gives in. "See you in a couple days. And w
- Jamie and Paul spend a lot of time talking to me about why I
- Paul doesn't like it. "You love what you do. You're good at
- "Yeah. But—"
- "Fuck this, Gent. I can die walking to work. Hell, I work at
- I look at the floor. Jamie gets down in front of me, hands o
- I look into his eyes and all I can see is trust. And that ju
- "You take every precaution there is, right? You're careful.
- I nod. Fight the urge to check my hands.
- "So don't do this, okay? Go afternoons only if you want, but
- "But I don't want you to get sick."
- "Keep being as careful as you are. We won't. You won't."
- I sit back in the chair and close my eyes. Think. Feel Jamie
- "Okay." I take a breath and think for a minute, or at least
- Hear a soft sigh and then Paul's kissing me. Hand at my neck
- I'm just so tired.
- * * * *
- We all go down and get tested. We all go down and get the re
- Not sure what it is about being shit scared that make us all
- We talk about me going back to work again, but not for long.
- Jamie still thinks I'm wasting my talent, and Paul still thi
- "I just ... I can't take knowing I can pass something on to
- Jamie sighs and passes me the fried shrimp. "Nothing's chang
- "I know," I say, gesturing with my chopsticks. "But that's t
- They exchange an uneasy look and Paul looks at me out of the
- "Um, Gent?" Jamie says slowly. "Wanna run that by us again?"
- I set down my plate and lean forward. "We have to take bette
- "Break it down a little more."
- I sigh and Jamie shakes his head. "Just fucking humor me, wi
- I look at him, then at Paul and back again. "Condoms. All th
- Jamie's eyes do this weird thing, they go really wide and th
- "No way," Jamie says. "In fact, I think we should ditch the
- My jaw drops. "Are you insane?"
- "No, but I'm beginning to think you are." He stands up, angr
- I stand up too. "Jamie, you can't be serious."
- "I am. And I think you're taking this too far, Gent. I think
- Jesus, I thought we were past this.
- I fall back on the couch and close my eyes. "This isn't a ga
- Jamie makes a noise that can only be called a grown of frust
- "Baby," I say. "Paul. I can't take the chance. Do you see th
- Paul looks at me for a moment and then comes over and sits n
- Jamie and I both grin before we can help it, though it doesn
- Suddenly, inexplicably, Paul's in charge, standing in front
- "Okay, this is how I see it," Paul says. He's crossing his a
- He smiles at me, looking encouraging and weirdly hopeful, so
- "Shut up," he says. Really. "Let me finish. You're being ove
- Oh, I am not!
- "Jamie, you're being reckless. You're trying to prove you're
- Oh, he so is!
- "I am not!" Jamie bursts out.
- "You are," Paul insists. "And shut up. Now, look. Jamie, you
- One of us sniffles, and I'm pretty sure it's one of them, bu
- Jamie leans back and takes a deep breath. "Okay."
- Paul looks at me and I hold up my hands. "Go easy on me, bab
- "Nope." He slides down the table until he's in front of me a
- He tilts his head at me and I open my mouth again, only to g
- Jamie's sitting back again, and I take his hand, which makes
- "Gent, promise us you'll take every possible precaution at w
- I blink, surprised. "Of course I promise."
- Paul nods. "Thank you. That's your job. Jamie, I don't want
- Jamie grins and Paul holds up his hand again and says, "But
- Jamie frowns and looks at me. Like I'm supposed to tell him
- "Gent?" Paul asks carefully.
- Uh oh. I sense a big flashing light of warning coming on.
- "Yes?" I say, just as carefully.
- "Did you always use condoms for blowjobs before us?"
- Damn.
- I sigh to match Jamie's. "No," I admit. "That usually fell i
- "Fine, it still is. So, I suggest—rather strongly—that we di
- No.
- Ah, damn it. Jamie and Paul are both looking at me, and I ha
- Okay, I might be projecting.
- "Fine," I say. Sometimes it's easier to give in than fight u
- Chapter Nine
- Being with twins, you learn a lot about three-way relationsh
- And you learn that no matter how much they love each other,
- Are you listening to me? I mean, think about it. Sibs. Who f
- They don't fight very often. They're too close, too much in
- Usually, if I'm left with Jamie, we have a beer while he gru
- If I'm left with Paul he gets all quiet and depressed and I
- But this time it's different. I'm left with Paul after Jamie
- "What do you need, baby?"
- He stares at me from across the living room and then runs to
- "Yeah?" I admit I'm a little confused. This is so not a Paul
- "Gent, I need."
- "What do you need?" I keep my voice low and smooth, rub his
- "Hit me."
- I freeze, knowing he was going to say it, and knowing I can'
- "Paul. I can't hurt you."
- He looks up at me then, his eyes wide and needy and full of
- I see he's serious, that he's not going to back down and tha
- "How do I know when to stop?"
- "When I come on your lap."
- Okay. Wasn't really expecting that, or the instant hard-on I
- "Again."
- So I hit him. Through his jeans and underwear, hard. Over an
- "Look at me."
- He shakes his head. "Hit me, Gent. Please."
- "Not until you look at me, damn it." I hate this. I hate hur
- He looks up and the need is still in his eyes, but he's turn
- "Take off your pants," I tell him, my throat dry.
- He rolls off me and jerks his pants off, is back across my l
- He nods and I start in on him again, and now it really does
- I hit him. Over and over and listen to him start to moan, ma
- I'm hard and I have to take care of my boy. I get him cleane
- I carry him into the bedroom, and no, it's not easy, seeing
- I go back to the living room and clean up, sit there until J
- "What happened?" He's all concern and worry now, and I'm a l
- "He asked me to hit him."
- Jamie, the fucker, grins and comes over, drapes himself acro
- I show him my hand and he kisses the palm and licks the fing
- "Yeah. He came for ages."
- He makes more happy sounds and shifts around, letting me fee
- "No. I didn't like it." Yeah, I lie to my boys sometimes. Sh
- He laughs. "Yeah, right." See? Makes no difference. They kno
- I arch up and grab his hand, put it where I need it most. "S
- He moves fast, to the floor between my legs and he's got my
- I thrust my hips up and he lets me, just changes the angle s
- He's swearing in my ear about how fucking tight I am and how
- I want a do over. I want to spank Paul 'cause we both want i
- But then, that's what tomorrow is for.
- Chapter Ten
- It's Jamie's night to close the store so Paul talks me into
- We're sitting there watching this ... show, and I'm trying t
- Paul's just watching, not looking at me at all to see how I'
- Finally it's over and we can leave, except Paul wants to sta
- "What's up?" he asks. And isn't that a good lead in?
- I just tilt my head and look at him and he blushes. "Oh," he
- I'm thinking that Paul has more than one kink, what with the
- He drags me down the alley, between a closed grocery and a f
- I spin him hard as we round the corner, and he's laughing. H
- So I kiss him, and swallow his laughter, turn it into a moan
- He's trying to talk, so I ease off and lean back, looking at
- The dear boy brought lube and rubbers.
- "Do me," he says and kisses me hard before turning to face t
- Not gonna turn that down. "Fuck yeah."
- I get his pants down to his knees and mine down just far eno
- "How do you want me, Paul?" I whisper. "Nice and gentle, lik
- "Oh Christ, yes!" Paul fucking hollers and then he's moving
- I'm too worked up to play, so I hold his hips and just fuck
- "Paul, yeah, do it. Touch yourself, fuck, so hot. God, want
- He shudders and calls my name as he shoots, spunk hitting th
- We're breathing heavy and I'm not sure my legs will move for
- "We gotta go see Jamie," he says, and my cock twitches. "We
- I nod and he just looks so fucking hot and horny and well fu
- Paul and I manage to hail a cab after walking a block or so
- I fight Paul off most of the way to the store, but by the ti
- Paul drags me into the store and we stand just inside the do
- Jamie blinks at us. The store is just about to close so ther
- Paul giggles again. I smack him on the ass and we walk to th
- It's a nice place, with comfortable chairs and stuff here an
- Anyway, Paul and I flop into one of the chairs and wait unti
- So, I've got my tongue down his throat and Paul's making his
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