Give in to Me (5 page)

A half-hour later I was parked behind the Anderson Gallery unsure of what the hell I was doing there but sure I wanted to meet Nina in person and not only to make amends for what had happened to her father. I hadn’t planned on being interested in her. All I wanted to do was see if I could find a way to help her, but something in the way she held her head high as she did the dirty work dumped on her at the gallery impressed me.

I wanted to know more about this woman, and that was something pretty rare for me, so I stood there waiting in that alley next to the Dumpster hoping she’d be the person forced to take out the garbage and not one of the other two women serving drinks and cocktail wieners that night. When the door opened, I saw luck was on my side.

“Nice show, huh?” I asked, willing to lie if it got the ball rolling.

She spun around, obviously frightened, and I realized that a strange man standing in a dark alley waiting for a woman probably wasn’t the best move. I was no rapist, but it still didn’t look good. I remained cool, standing against the Jag with my arms folded, hoping to give off a non-attacking vibe. I didn’t need to begin whatever this was with her screaming for the cops.

Regaining her cool, she answered, “Yeah, it was great. The artist is quite talented.”

I didn’t know her, but I knew bullshit when I heard it. Whether or not the artwork was as bad as I thought it was, she hadn’t liked it. That was clear.

“It was shit and you know it. Nice outfit, though.”

I don’t know why I took the cheap shot at her clothes. It wasn’t like they were anything anyone would willingly wear if they didn’t have to. Sometimes I was a real asshole. Instantly, I felt shitty as a frown settled onto her mouth and she snapped at me. I deserved it and tried to fix the damage my stupid comment had already caused to the situation.

I couldn’t help but smile at the memory of Nina putting me in my place within a minute of meeting me. She was strong even then, standing there alone with a strange man in an alley way and telling him to basically go fuck himself when he stepped out of line. Looking back, I guessed I should have been happy she even agreed to get into the car with me after my stupid comment.

She’d taken a chance on me that night and trusted me not to be some ax murderer. Now I had to trust her. Whether I liked it or not, I had to give up control of us and hope to God I didn’t lose her to someone who could give her the one thing all my money couldn’t buy.

A stable life.

Chapter Three

Nina

For the second time in a week, Daryl wanted to speak to me. Just hearing his voice on my phone made my stomach flip with nerves. I still hadn’t given up on the idea that one day he’d call and tell me that Tristan was finally coming home. So as I waited for Daryl to arrive, I busied myself with fantasies of Tristan’s homecoming and the beginning of our life together as husband and wife. It seemed like we’d been fighting for that life for so long that it was hard to remember when we were just us—Tristan and Nina, happy and in love.

I heard a noise behind me and turned in anticipation to find Jordan standing in the dining room doorway. My disappointment was surely clear in my face, and I saw her react to it with pity. I hated the pity.

“Oh, I thought you might be Daryl,” I weakly explained.

“I need to invest in some better makeup if people are beginning to confuse me with that guy,” she joked.

I knew she was trying to keep my spirits up and appreciated the effort. “No, he called to let me know he needs to speak to me, so I thought it might be him when I heard footsteps.”

Jordan laughed. “I better get back to my Pilates then. Want some company until he arrives?”

Nodding¸ I smiled at her joke. “Yeah.”

Throwing her bag on the table, she sat down and reached out to give me the “sympathetic hand touch” she did when she thought I was sad or depressed. Not that she was wrong. I was feeling bad.

Giving my hand a gentle squeeze, she asked, “Anything I can do to cheer you up? Maybe the tragic story of how I’ve resorted to doing the most idiotic things to get Varo’s attention might bring a real smile out of you.”

I’d seen Jordan’s attempts to get Varo to notice her and wondered why he never seemed to even give her a second glance. She was knockout pretty with beautiful green eyes and long blond hair. She had a much better body than I’d ever had, probably since she actually exercised regularly and took care of herself. On top of all the outside goodness, she was funny and vivacious. What was there not to like?

Just the day before I’d watched from the sitting room window as she took her daily stroll around the grounds and intentional turn toward the carriage house to try to speak to him. He just stood there leaning against the car, barely smiling in response to whatever she was saying. I knew Jordan well enough to know what she sounded like when she was flirting, and never before had I seen any man just stand there with a stony face like Varo did. It was almost like he was deliberately trying not to like her. West appeared more interested in what she’d been saying and even stood there to talk to her after Varo walked away.

“I think that man must be nuts, but don’t feel bad. I can barely get a word from him, and he’s supposed to actually work for me,” I said in an attempt to make her feel better.

Jordan shrugged. “It’s no big deal. I mean, what would I do with someone like that anyway? He’s as big as a house. Probably on steroids, and you know what they say about those guys.” Measuring out an inch between her thumb and forefinger, she snickered. “Hung like a chipmunk.”

I laughed out loud at the thought of such a huge man with such a tiny penis. Leave it to Jordan to make me laugh at her misery and lessen my own at the same time. “You’re so bad!”

“His loss. I could have rocked his world, even if he is Needledick the Bug Fucker.”

Her words made me choke on my morning coffee, and liquid nearly came shooting out of my nose. Coughing, I croaked out, “Jordan, I’ll never be able to look at him the same way again! Jesus, I have to deal with him.”

“You’re not supposed to deal with his junk. Just his silent as a statue routine. I’m sure you’ll forget what I said before you see him again,” she said with a wink.

“I doubt I’ll ever forget it. Needledick the Bug Fucker is something that sticks with you.”

From behind us came the sound of someone clearing their throat, and I slowly turned to see who’d heard us slandering my bodyguard’s penis size, hoping that it wasn’t Varo himself. Thankfully, it was just Daryl, although the look on his face was pure confusion.

“That’s my cue to leave,” Jordan said cheerfully as she grabbed her bag. “Call me later, Nina. I’ll be in prep time right after lunch.”

“Okay. Have a good one filling those kids’ minds with knowledge.”

As Jordan passed Daryl on her way out, her gaze slipped to below his waist and she chuckled. If he had any idea what she was doing, he didn’t show it. Taking the seat she’d just left, he reached into his coat pocket to pull out his little notepad and began flipping through the pages as I sat there stifling my own chuckle.

“We have a few things to deal with today,” he pronounced ominously without looking up from his notes.

“Okay. Hit me with them.”

He continued to flip through the pages of his pad until he reached one covered in scribbles. I was in no mood to try to decipher what he’d written, so I sat back and watched his lips move as he read over his notes.

Daryl stopped reading and looked up at me. Taking a deep breath, he let the air leave his lungs in a slow sigh. “We think Karl is going to start focusing on you. He’s looking for something and we think he’s eventually going to run out of places to look other than this house.”

“Look for what? What could possibly be here that he wants? I thought the problem was the notebook Tristan has.”

“He’s looked through that tablet of your father’s over and over and can’t find anything. If what Karl is looking for is somewhere else, it’s not in Tristan’s penthouse. It’s been ransacked twice already.”

“What?” The word ransacked sent shivers down my spine. That Karl and his goons had turned to breaking into Tristan’s penthouse scared the hell out of me. It also made me feel violated. While the penthouse wasn’t exactly anywhere I’d ever called home, it bothered me that strangers may have gone through our clothes looking for whatever they wanted or trashed the picture I’d picked out for the bedroom.

“It’s okay. They didn’t do too much damage, but it’s obvious that they were looking for something and didn’t find it.”

“So you think Karl and his people are going to come looking here?”

Daryl gave me one of his rare smiles and shook his head. “Don’t worry. The security system Tristan had installed is first rate, and Varo and West are always nearby to make sure you’re safe.”

“Then why are we talking about this, Daryl? I don’t understand what the problem is if I’m safe.” He hesitated, making me nervous. “What? You just said Varo and West keep me safe. I’m not?”

“You are. We just think that might not be enough. Tristan thinks you need to make it seem like you’re, uh, living your life.”

“We think? Tristan thinks? What are you talking about, Daryl? You’re freaking me out.”

He looked away and then turned back to face me. “Tristan thinks it would be best if you made it seem like you’ve moved on.”

Daryl’s words hit my brain and suddenly it felt like the room was swimming around me. Moved on? My hands began to shake at the very thought of moving on without Tristan.

“What the hell does moved on mean?” I asked in a scared voice. “Are you saying Tristan isn’t coming back?”

“No, no, no. Nothing like that. Just that you need to pretend that you’re with someone else now so Karl can think that Tristan’s dead.”

My jaw fell open as I stared at Daryl, who acted like he’d just said something entirely reasonable. Was he saying Tristan wanted me to pretend to date another man? Had I heard him correctly?

“I can see by your face that I might have said that wrong. It’s just that Tristan doesn’t want you to be in danger and if Karl believes you’ve moved on…”

I didn’t let Daryl finish his sentence before I blew up. “I’m not doing it. I don’t care what you and Tristan think is best. I’m not pretending to be with someone else. It’s just ridiculous! I don’t want to be with anyone else, and even if I agreed with this, where would I find someone willing to playact with me? No way. You’ll have to tell him I’m not going to do it.”

Reaching into his coat pocket again, he mumbled, “I thought you’d say something like that.” He handed me an envelope. “This is from Tristan.”

I looked down at the first letter I’d received from Tristan since he’d left and felt the tears well up in my eyes. The first time he’d bothered to write anything to me and it was to tell me to be with someone else. My stomach clenched at the thought.

“I’ll give you some time to read it and be back in a bit,” Daryl said as he stood to leave.

I didn’t want to read it. All I wanted all these months was to hear from Tristan, and now that I had, it was just to tell me to show the world that I’d moved on. The envelope had nothing written on the outside, and when I turned it over, I saw the flap was just tucked in, not sealed. It was like nothing of him was there.

Slipping the letter out, I unfolded it and began to read, prepared to remain angry and unwilling to go with his plan. Just two sentences in and any hopes of that disappeared.

Dear Nina,

By now, Daryl has told you what I need you to do. I know you don’t want to and God knows I hate the idea of you acting like you care about another man almost as much as I hate being away from you, but I need you to do this for us. I know it won’t be easy, but my biggest fear is that it won’t be hard for you since I’ve left you alone for so long. Please know that if there was any other way, I would have done things differently.

Every letter you wrote me, every text you send means more to me than you’ll ever know. They’re my lifelines—the things that keep me going when I feel like I have nothing of any worth left anymore. I can handle losing everything else but not you. Knowing you’re waiting for me is the one thing that makes me go on.

Nina, it tears me up inside to ask you to pretend you’ve moved on to another. Do this for us and at least I can believe you’ll be safe. Think about me and know that I never stop thinking about you. I promise that someday when all of this is over we’ll get to live that life we both dream of. Never doubt that we can make it through this.

I love you and wish we were together. Your love is what I live for. Until we’re together again, keep me in your heart. What we are is worth fighting for, and trust me, I’m fighting with everything I have.

Love,

Tristan

Just when I was ready to be stubborn, Tristan accomplished what no other man could—instead of being angry at him for what he was asking, I felt sorry for what I had to do. I sensed his heartache in every word he’d written, and it broke my heart.

“Everything okay in here?”

Daryl looked uncomfortable as I wiped a tear away from under my eye. He took his seat again and waited for me to speak, but I could tell he was still feeling uneasy about how emotional Tristan’s letter had made me.