Give Up On Me (9 page)

T
hree years later
…

“Mommie!” An incessant banging of spoon to table followed this outburst, and Janae glanced over her shoulder at her daughter.

“Nerea, stop yelling. Mommie will have your breakfast ready in just a minute.”

While Janae set out the
magdelenas
, Maria, the maid, brought in the basket of fresh fruit she had gathered from the orchard.

“
Quieres leche caliente
?” Maria said.

“Si,” Janae answered. “Just a little milk.
Un poco.
I want her to eat her food.”

“Si!” Nerea shouted, and Janae rolled her eyes. Ever since her daughter had discovered her voice, she decided she needed to exercise her vocal cords at their highest level.

“
Bebé
,” the maid coaxed, “You want
magdelena o pollo
?”

Janae glared at the woman. “Don’t offer her that when she hasn’t eaten her eggs or fruit yet. Having you spoil her isn’t helping.”

“Cupcake!” Nerea yelled and threw her hands in the air. Janae groaned. She had hoped her daughter didn’t understand Maria’s quick speech or the offerings, but apparently the intelligent little thing understood Spanish just as well as English. Janae shouldn’t have been surprised since she was born in Valencia.

Janae placed Nerea’s plate on the table. While the people of Spain seemed to love their sweets for breakfast, Janae couldn’t stand the thought of Nerea having nothing but sugar. She always insisted on some type of protein and fruit for her daughter. If Nerea had room in her little tummy afterward, she was allowed a sweet roll or a cupcake.

Nerea wouldn’t eat all of the food set before her, but she would eat enough so that Janae didn’t have to worry about her starving. A couple months ago, she had rushed Nerea to the doctor’s office, scared because she wasn’t eating enough. The doctor had reassured her it was natural for a toddler to be a picky eater, and they would still manage to get enough nutrition.

“
Pollo
,” Nerea said, pouting at the plate.

“No,
pollo
. Eat your food.”

The little pink lips poked out even farther, and Janae had trouble not laughing at that cute face. Nerea was much fairer than her cocoa skin, and her flyaway hair was honey gold. To the touch, it felt like rough silk—not quite the smoothness of white people’s hair, but much softer than Janae’s. When Janae looked at Nerea, all she saw was Matt, and it hurt so much even after all this time.

She sat down beside Nerea, whose booster seat was hooked onto the table, and handed her a slice of apple. Nerea took it and bit into the fruit. Janae stroked fingers through her hair. How long would they have to stay in Valencia? She loved it here, and the help from the maid was great, but she missed her home country.

Matt’s family owned a hotel in Madrid, and sometimes she sat outside on her patio to look over the lower part of the city. She would wonder whether somewhere far out there Matt was in Spain and thinking about her. On the other hand, it was better if he had forgotten. Then she could go home.

“If it looks like my brother has come to his senses in a few years—if it takes that long—maybe you can come back,” Kyler had said when he dropped her at the airport that last night. “We’d prefer though that you don’t live in Massachusetts.”

Janae had visited a few vineyards since living in Spain, and she thought if she ever moved back to the United States, she would want to live near one, somewhere in California maybe. Then she could see her dad. How she missed him.

She and her dad had hugged and cried together for a long time. He agreed to abide by her decision and to tell Matt if he came looking for her that she’d been with him for the money. A part of her hoped he wouldn’t fall for it, but she had to think of others and not just her selfish wants.

Needs,
she corrected.
I needed him, but I survived.

Tears filled her eyes. She was surprised that after so long, if she thought about Matt too much, she would cry. Blinking away the moisture, she forced him from her thoughts. Nerea offered her a piece of apple. Janae leaned over and took a bite. She knew why she’d been okay. This sweet little girl had carried her through. Nerea needed her mother more than Janae needed Matt. Nerea kept her getting up every morning and putting one foot in front of the other.

After Nerea finished her food, Janae unbuckled her from her chair and lifted her into her arms. Maria began cleaning up the mess, and Janae walked out of the kitchen to head to her bedroom. She changed Nerea’s clothes after washing her face and hands. After selecting a book from the collection she had bought online and had shipped, she carried Nerea and the book to the patio and sat down in her favorite chair to read.

“Is this a good one?” she asked Nerea.

Her daughter slapped the page. “
Bien
,” she said.

“What will I do with you when we go home, huh?”

Her daughter explained what they would do in her garbled language, and Janae laughed.

“Never mind. Shush, so we can read.” Nerea settled down and burrowed into the crook of Janae’s arm. Janae put her feet up on the chair across from her. How long could they live like this, she wondered. She didn’t own the land all around them.

An older couple owned it all. Janae had rented the small house on their property, which might have at one time been used by workman on the land. Janae was able to afford the rent and the small salary of keeping a maid.

She figured eventually she might have to work, but living frugally, she was able stay with Nerea while her daughter was small. The rest of the money Margaret had given her could stay in the bank gathering interest. She drew only the bare minimum from it. If she really was a gold digger, this wouldn’t have been a bad deal. Except a gold digger might not want to live such a simple life in the Spanish countryside.

“
Señorita, hay una llamada para usted,
” Maria said from the doorway.

Janae took a few seconds to translate in her head and frowned. “A call for me? No one ever calls me.”

She put the book aside and stood. When she reached Maria, she handed over Nerea and entered the house. There was only one phone, and someone had decided the best room for it was the den, a tiny room off the living room. Janae didn’t keep a cell phone because it was too much of an expense. She didn’t know anyone in Spain, and calling the U.S. was out of the question because of her agreement. At first she had felt like she had chopped off her hand, and then she grew used to not checking her emails and texts every second of the day.

She sat down at the scratched wooden desk and picked up the receiver. “
Hola, este es
Janae.”

“Janae?”

Her stomach dropped. She hadn’t expected to hear that voice ever again. “K-Kyler. Why are you calling me? I haven’t broken our agreement.”

She squeezed a hand shut and tried to quell the shaking that had come over her.

“I know.” He hesitated, and fear gripped her.

“Is something wrong?”

“I would like to meet with you.”

“We don’t have anything to say to each other. If you were calling to tell me I can come back to the United States, you would have said so right off the bat. Is that why you’re calling?”

“It’s more complicated than that.”

Fear changed to irritation. “Look, just say what you have to say. I hoped to never talk to you or your grandmother again. You’re ruining my day. Oh wait, y’all don’t give a shit about how I feel.”

“Please, meet with me. I think you’re going to want to hear me out. I’m in Spain, not far from Valencia. I can drive to a restaurant in your area if that’s convenient for you.”

“Calling me out of the blue, wanting me to meet you today and without notice, and you’re asking if a restaurant is convenient. Whatever, I’ll come.”

“Thank you.” He named the place he had in mind and gave her the address. “I’ll meet you at, let’s say eleven o’clock.”

“Fine.”

She hung up the phone. What could he possibly want? He could have just said if he was inviting her to come back home. Wait, was Matt closing in on finding her, and he was going to tell her she had to move? If so, he could forget it. She wasn’t running all over creation as if she was some wanted criminal. That’s for damn sure.

“Maria?” she called, and the woman appeared in the doorway. “Can you watch, Nerea for me?
Te necesito para cuidar niños, por favor
.”

“Si.” She nodded. “Nerea, she sleep.”

“Okay. I won’t be too long.”

After changing into something more presentable than the faded casual clothes she wore around the house, Janae arranged for a car to pick her up. One of the men who worked part-time for her landlords also ran a car service. He had given her his card the day she arrived in Valencia, and Janae used his services whenever she went anywhere she couldn’t reach by walking.

Soon she arrived at the restaurant and walked inside. She was about to speak with the host, but Kyler appeared from behind a wall and approached her.

She started at sight of him because he looked so much like Matt. His name rose to her lips, and she almost blurted it out before getting a hold of herself. When Kyler passed into a patch of sunlight from a window, she saw his face more clearly. This wasn’t her Matt. Kyler was older, and after three years, a set of crow’s feet appeared at the corners of his eyes. A sprinkling of gray mixed into his dark hair, and she wondered what he had had to worry about over the last few years.

“Thank you for coming,” he said and gestured for her to walk ahead of him. When they approached the host, Kyler spoke in perfect Spanish, and they were seated right away.

“What’s this about?” she demanded.

“Perhaps you’d like a drink?”

She gritted her teeth and ordered a margarita.

“You’re free to order food as well. I’ll be glad to pick up the tab.”

“You bet you will,” she snapped. “But no, I’m not hungry. What’s this about, Kyler? Did Margaret send you?”

“My grandmother doesn’t fully agree with my decision to meet with you, but I happen to think it’s our only choice.”

That surprised her. “You’re being cryptic, and it’s pissing me off. Get to it.”

For an instant, she saw such intense pain in his expression it threw her off. Then it was gone, and she wasn’t sure it appeared in the first place. Stubborn as hell, Kyler didn’t speak until their drinks arrived. When he took a huge swig of his, she realized he had waited to fortify his own resolve. Nothing could have made her more nervous.

“For the last three years my brother has lived life recklessly. He’s been all about fun and partying.”

“If you came here to gloat about how great he’s doing without me, stuff it up your ass.” She started to rise, but he caught her wrist. She glared until he removed his hand.

“Please, sit down. I’m getting to the point, and it’s not to rub your nose in anything.”

She dropped into her seat and sipped her drink.

“As I said, he’s been living recklessly, heedless of his safety.”

Janae began to get it. Her throat dried. “You don’t mean… He…” She faltered, tears in her eyes.

“No!” He extended his hands in a gesture to calm her. “He’s alive.”

She breathed a sigh of relief. “But he was in an accident recently. He sustained severe injury to his brain and has been in a coma for the last three months.”

Janae burst out crying. She covered her mouth to smother her sobs, but she couldn’t hold them back. Kyler stayed silent and let her cry. After a few minutes, he handed her a few napkins, and she took them with shaking hands.

“Is he going to be okay?” she whispered. “What did the doctors say?”

“They said most of the recovery should happen within the first six months. We’re half way through that, but he’s not responding at all. Not to sound or pain or anything.”

For the first time, his voice broke. All the time she’d known him, Janae had never thought Kyler or his grandmother cared about Matt. He cleared his throat and blinked a few times.

“His doctor also said that the brain can continue to heal even up to two years.”

“Two years! He will be in a coma all that time?”

“No, not necessarily. I’m just saying healing. He could wake up tomorrow and still continue to heal, making improvements. Right now, we don’t know anything about how much damage has been done.”

“You mean memory loss and movement and all that?”

He nodded.

“I appreciate you telling me, Kyler. You didn’t have to, and you had no way of knowing if I still love him.”

He stared at her. “That’s not the only reason I’m here.”

Were they going to let her see him? That was too much to hope for, but she would jump at the chance if so. With him in a coma, he would probably never know it. She could feast her eyes on his handsome face and lock it away in her heart before going home to Nerea. The fact that she couldn’t tell Matt about Nerea was killing her as it was.

“Janae, I want you to get him to wake up.”

She blinked. “Excuse me?”

“It’s believed that coma patients can hear the voices of their families. In some cases, it’s the voices of their loved ones that lead them back to consciousness.” His cheeks pinked. “Matt lived the way he did because he loved you, and he couldn’t see his life without you. It’s my belief that he hoped something like this would happen.”

“You mean he was suicidal?”

“Not intentionally.”

“Nobody should love that much. His life is worth something whether I’m in it or not!”

“True.” His blue gaze flashed resentment at her for an instant and disappeared. “But Matt has always been an extremely passionate person. I agree that he loves you too much.”

She frowned.

“And it’s because of his love that I think your voice is the one that will wake him.”

Janae clutched her fingers together in her lap. She was scared. To see him was one thing, to possibly have him see her, that was a whole other issue. Could she look into those eyes and walk away again? Could she keep the secret about his daughter? Everything inside her said Matt would be the perfect daddy.

No, his ass would totally spoil Nerea worse than Maria.