Goddess (25 page)

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Authors: Fiona McIntosh

BOOK: Goddess
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‘How are you feeling? A bit lightheaded?’ Lazar asked, concern in his tone.

Boaz shook his head free of his bitter thoughts. ‘Yes, er, I am, to tell the truth.’

Lazar nodded. ‘It’s normal. Don’t fight it. I can remember the first desert journey I undertook. I think I went mad for a while. It’s not the loneliness or the silence. It’s the heat and the dryness of the air. If you allow yourself to lose too much moisture, your mind starts to play tricks on you.’ He reached for his saddlebag. ‘Here,’ he said, dribbling some water into a smoothed bowl that Boaz had seen the Khalid use. Lazar’s movements were as fluid as the liquid nectar he was collecting in the bowl, without missing a step or losing a drop to the parched sand. ‘Drink regularly. We have plenty for the five of us and no-one is more important than you.’

‘Do you mean that?’ Boaz asked, gratefully swallowing from the cunningly crafted lip of the bowl. He licked droplets of water from his lips, so none could escape.

‘Your importance, you mean?’

Boaz nodded.

Lazar gave him a glance of query. ‘Of course I do.’

‘It’s just that I thought the desert made all men equal.’

‘All
men
, perhaps, Highness, not Zars,’ Lazar said, winking.

Boaz didn’t smile but felt his heart ease slightly. He missed Lazar. Why was he thinking such dark thoughts about him? This man had been loyal to his father and was equally loyal to him. It was wrong to mistrust him.

‘Have another bowl.’

‘No, really, I feel refreshed.’

‘Only your mouth is telling you that. If you’re going to walk with me, you need more. Please, trust me.’

Boaz did as he was asked, relishing the cool liquid as it slid down his throat. ‘I don’t know how you ever did that journey across the desert alone. You wouldn’t have been that much older than I am.’

Lazar chuckled softly, a sound Boaz knew was shared with few, if any. ‘I was driven by an urge I barely understood—one I still don’t.’

‘What was it?’

‘It was over a woman,’ the Spur said. He sighed softly, stroking the falcon briefly. ‘And you’re the first person I’ve ever admitted that to.’

Boaz was intrigued. ‘What was her name?’

‘She was called Shara and was a sweet, bright, gentle soul.’

‘You loved her?’

‘With all my heart. I would likely be king-in-waiting for Galinsea right now had we been together.’

The pause that followed Lazar’s admission felt so suddenly fragile that Boaz filled it with a
lighthearted comment. ‘And no doubt eyeing off Percheron as potential plunder.’

‘Not at all. As soon as I laid eyes on Percheron it owned me. I don’t believe, even as king-in-waiting, I would have felt any differently towards it. I know I would have worked towards our being friendly neighbours.’

‘What happened?’

‘To Shara?’

Boaz nodded. This was better than the dark silence. The heat was suddenly easier to bear.

‘She died.’

‘Oh, forgive me. An accident?’

‘No,’ Lazar answered quickly. His tone was final. ‘She just died. But she broke my heart and it has taken many years to mend.’

‘Is that why you’ve never taken a woman or wife?’

Lazar nodded slowly. ‘Yes. At first it would have felt like a betrayal and then I just got used to myself and being alone. I had Jumo for company. I didn’t want anything more for the last couple of decades.’

‘But now you do?’

Lazar turned to him and Boaz saw a flash of something spark in the Spur’s eyes before he narrowed them. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, my mother, of course!’

‘Ah!’ Lazar made a rueful sound, as though he hadn’t even considered Herezah. Boaz frowned as his Spur continued. ‘Your mother and I are not
meant to be. That was a mistake. Nothing happened—’

‘That’s not what she says.’

Lazar nodded. ‘I know. I think your mother would like to read into a situation something far more than what actually occurred.’

‘So you are not lovers?’ Boaz queried, astonishment rippling through him.

Lazar checked they were not being overheard. ‘No, we are not. May I be candid, Majesty?’

‘Please.’

‘Your mother made an advance that I was not in a position to refuse. Or perhaps that’s unfair. I should have been more firm in my refusal but she had me cornered, Majesty, and without going into detail, it was a delicate situation. She had been so generous and kind that I was a little unprepared for her.’

‘I see. She paints an entirely different picture.’

‘I imagine she would. Let me confirm I hold no feelings for the Crown Valide, other than deep appreciation for how she helped me back to better health and no little admiration for her courage in facing the Galinseans alone.’

‘Then who did you think I meant just then, may I ask?’

Lazar looked back at him, bewildered. ‘Pardon, Majesty?’

‘Just a moment ago. When I asked about whether you now feel ready to take on a woman, you seemed to react favourably to the suggestion.’

Lazar did not answer immediately. He cleared his throat before he finally replied. ‘No, Highness, that’s not what I meant. It’s not that I’m ready to take a woman into my life. All I was trying to explain, and perhaps I should never have revealed it, is that I’ve been very blinkered in my approach to women over the years. But since I’ve been sick and my own mortality has come into question, I realise hankering after a lost love is a cold and pointless existence.’

‘In this you are right. That’s why the Percherese encourage a man to enjoy many women, to take many wives.’ Boaz saw Lazar bite back on whatever response was leaping to his lips.

‘Indeed,’ was all he said. ‘Do you feel any better for the water?’

‘It’s amazing but yes, I do. You were right. I must take liquid at more regular intervals.’

‘And then your mind won’t play tricks as I’ve warned. I was convinced I was being chased by the devil himself, I can recall. Another time when the heat and silence had got to me I began to believe all sorts of nonsense about people I had liked, people who’d been generous to me my whole life.’

‘Such as?’ Boaz asked, his interest piqued.

Lazar shrugged. ‘I believed for a while that Shara died to spite me. I believed my parents hated me and I was sure my father was sending a party to hunt me down. My friends I suspected of treachery—these are people I had known all my
life and who had been nothing if not the most loyal of companions.’ He sighed. ‘I’m only telling you this because the desert can twist your mind if you aren’t strong, if you don’t take all the right precautions against its weapons.’

‘And water is a good precaution?’

‘It’s the most potent one in your arsenal. Here, keep this bowl. Drink on the move, every hour. I think we should get back into the saddles. We can do another few hours before sundown.’

Boaz nodded. ‘Lazar, what about Pez?’

Lazar looked gravely back at him. ‘Do you have any idea why he would not have come to the meeting point as arranged?’

‘No reason at all. He told me he would be at your house.’

‘He was,’ Lazar said tonelessly. ‘It’s where I left him and he was counting the minutes almost to leaving.’

‘Yes, he was eager.’

‘Do you know why?’

‘He told me he was nervous about Tariq of all people. He was keen to get out of Percheron and into the desert away from him.’

‘Did he elaborate as to why he was so uneasy around the Grand Vizier?’

Boaz glanced at the Spur uncomfortably. ‘I’m sure he’s told you, so you don’t have to act ignorant. He said he believes that Tariq is…’ He paused to shrug, suddenly embarrassed.

‘Go on.’

‘Well, he seems to think the Grand Vizier is an impostor, that he wields a magic.’ Boaz waited for Lazar to scoff but his Spur only gazed awkwardly back at him. ‘And the fact that you don’t scorn such a ridiculous sentiment truly troubles me.’

‘Why?’

‘Because it is ridiculous.’

‘Is it?’

‘Oh, come on, Lazar. Don’t tell me you agree with him.’

Lazar remained silent momentarily, looking straight ahead. Boaz cast a glance in the same direction seeing only featureless golden wilderness stretching endlessly ahead, the heat rising from the sands making the whole landscape shimmer and trick the eye.

‘Zar Boaz, this is not easy for me to say to you because I realise it must sound paranoid at best, and at worst will cause you to consider me as insane as Pez would like to have everyone believe he is. However, I don’t know anyone more steady than Pez and I trust him implicitly.’ He had turned at the last word to stare at Boaz. ‘Yes, I do support his notion,’ he added, ‘no matter how mad that makes me sound.’

‘Magic?’ Boaz repeated, incredulous.

He watched Lazar cast a glance backwards as though fearful of being overheard.

‘You’ve experienced magic in your own life, Highness. Its presence should not shock you.’

‘But we’re talking about Tariq!’ Boaz said.

‘Except we don’t believe that person to be Tariq, Highness,’ Lazar uttered softly.

‘We? Listen to yourself, Lazar.’

‘I know how it sounds. It took me a while to accept this as well.’

‘Who do you think he is?’

Lazar ignored the question. ‘Surely, my Zar, you can see the outward changes if not accept the more sinister nuances in his manner, his temperament?’

‘I do accept he has reformed himself into someone I can respect now, rather than detest.’

‘Is that not enough to set the alarm bells ringing, Majesty? A man doesn’t “reform” himself at close to seventy summers.’

‘I rather meant that he was not honest with my father.’

‘And the man he truly is—that’s the man we now see today, is that how you see it?’

‘Yes,’ Boaz said. ‘That’s precisely what I meant.’

‘Then what did Tariq gain for more than two decades acting with such guile when he was in a position to be this man with your father?’

Boaz realised he had no answer for that. Instead, he gave a disgruntled sigh to cover his lack of response. ‘I’ll think on what you say,’ he finally said.

‘I would appreciate it, Highness, if you would not allow Tariq to know my suspicions, for this is not the time or the place to be challenging the Grand Vizier. We need to be as co-operative with one another as possible.’

‘I do agree with you on that, Lazar.’

‘Thank you. I had better go and speak with the Khalid, get everyone mounted up. I see Tariq never did give his camel a rest,’ Lazar said sarcastically, drifting backwards down the line of beasts, and leaving Boaz with yet more questions swirling in his mind.

21

As early as it was, Herezah winced at the ferocity of the day’s warmth as she squinted out towards the sea from her balcony. Today was the single most important day of her life. How she handled herself during the course of the next few hours would shape how she, the first Crown Valide in almost two centuries, would be remembered.

She was already daydreaming of her triumphant smile as her son returned to a Percheron secured by her negotiations. People would laud her courageous, single-handed effort to parley a peace for the realm whilst the Zar was engaged in an equally brave hunt through the desert for his abducted Zaradine. It would make inspiring reading in the history books. Herezah fed off this notion of grandeur and respect as a means of quelling her increasing nervousness. Her meeting with the Galinsean queen was in three hours.

The queen’s name was Angeline and that’s all Herezah knew about her; she had no idea as to what her personality might be or how best to deal with her. Herezah didn’t like the unknown and her lack of knowledge about the Galinsean royals was
the only reason she had permitted Salmeo to be present. It had probably been unwise to unsettle the Grand Master Eunuch in the way that she had. It certainly would not aid their relationship, which was clearly irreconcilable. But she hadn’t been able to help herself. For the first time, the roles had been reversed and for once Herezah had held the upper hand. She had found the lure to intimidate him irresistible. He would, of course, make her pay. Salmeo was an interminably patient man and she knew he would wait for his best opportunity to humiliate her, likely when—and if—she were returned to the harem.

Herezah never intended to return to that prison. After tasting freedom in her role as Crown Valide, how could she go backwards? Perhaps Boaz, in his bid to modernise Percheron and its ways, might accede to her desire to dissolve her position, allow her to join the palace community as some sort of ambassador for the royals. She knew that was wishful thinking but it was nice to dream. More likely, he would grant her permission to move from the palace into a guarded house, perhaps in the lower foothills, or he might build her a beautiful villa overlooking the sea. She would agree to be surrounded by Elim but she would be free of Salmeo and free of the harem.

She had lived without love all her life. She could easily live alone and lead the life of a chaste, quiet woman if necessary. So today she would broker the peace; she would impress the Galinseans with her
diplomacy and intelligence and she would promote neighbourly relations. She would do everything Boaz wanted from her and she would be everything Lazar didn’t think she could attain. And then, with her son’s permission, she would withdraw to a life with no political aspirations and no intrigues. If they returned Ana, as she hoped they would now, then the Zaradine could be the most senior and important woman in the harem. Ana already had the harem women eating out of her palm. They all adored her.

Herezah turned at the sound of Elza’s arrival.

‘Your tea, Crown Valide,’ the servant said, bowing. Before Herezah could ask, Elza said, ‘It’s pomegranate and lizuli leaf.’

‘You think I need calming?’ Herezah asked, watching the woman lay down the tray.

‘The palace is abuzz with your task today, Crown Valide. I hope you don’t think it impertinent of me.’

‘No, Elza, I don’t. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t apprehensive,’ Herezah replied politely, turning her gaze back to the balcony but not before catching the frown of surprise on her servant’s face.

‘May I fetch some food to break your fast, Crown Valide?’ Elza asked hesitantly.

‘No. I have no appetite this morning. But you can bathe me. I want my hair curled today and pinned. Tell Salmeo I want the emeralds—the full set, hair, ears, nose, fingers, wrists, ankles and navel.’

‘Yes, Crown Valide.’

‘I will be wearing the cream and emerald silks today.’

‘Thank you, Crown Valide, an excellent choice,’ Elza replied.

‘And send in Bin. I want to go over the arrangements.’

This time Elza simply bowed and departed silently.

Salmeo was shown in and, despite his mood, he made a sound of genuine appreciation at the Crown Valide who stood, like a vision from a dream, bathed in the sunlight streaming in from her balcony as Elza made final adjustments to her superior’s robes.

‘Elza, enough! It is hot enough without your forcing me to stand in the light and bake my skin brown!’

‘Crown Valide,’ Salmeo said lightly, bowing low. ‘You look incredible.’

‘Thank you, Salmeo. I really needed to hear that,’ she replied.

Salmeo read the same surprise he felt at her tone and courtesy in the glance Elza threw him. He continued to smile. ‘I have brought the royal emeralds, as requested, Crown Valide. May I help you with them?’

‘Please,’ she said and again he felt a spike of startlement. ‘How are you feeling today, Crown Valide?’ he enquired, his tone light and
conversational as he opened the first of the flat boxes.

‘Filled with anticipation. Anxiety, determination, excitement.’

Salmeo could barely believe this was Herezah. He glared at Elza to dismiss her. ‘I can look after the Crown Valide from here, Elza. Go see to your other duties,’ he said. It would not do for Herezah to be too honest in front of the lowest slaves. ‘Let’s start with earrings,’ he said brightly.

Before long Herezah’s body was glittering with green gems and her tall, slender frame carried her robes and the royal jewels perfectly. If she didn’t impress the Galinsean entourage, Salmeo couldn’t imagine what might. Even Ana, for all her ethereal beauty, was no match for Herezah when the Crown Valide set her mind to flaunting her alluring stature together with her all-too-sharp mind.

‘Allow me to dress your hair, Crown Valide, with this final piece.’

‘It’s the emerald circlet, is it?’ she asked.

‘Yes. It will make you feel every inch a queen.’

‘I’ll need it,’ she admitted ruefully and their gazes met in the mirror. Salmeo cocked his large head to one side. She puzzled him today. He could almost forgive her. Almost. But not quite.

‘There,’ he said girlishly, giggling. ‘You are finished, Crown Valide, and I defy any man or woman, any king or queen, not to be dazzled.’

‘You’re most generous,’ she said, distracted. ‘Can you operate the barge alone?’

‘It is the small one that the Zars have used for private trips rather than the one we use for ceremonies. So yes, of course, it will be straightforward.’

She nodded. ‘I’m going to have to rely on you to serve refreshments to our guest, Salmeo. I know this is below—’

‘Don’t mention it, Crown Valide,’ he assured, probably surprising her as much as she was surprising him. She actually believed he might have made a genuine aide, a true confidant. Well, those days were behind them both. She had made sure of that with her high-handed treatment and underhand threats. ‘I am looking forward to seeing how we can surprise the Galinseans with our hospitality.’ He smiled broadly.
Oh yes, indeed, they were certainly going to leave an impression on their royal guest.

It had been many years since Herezah had travelled aboard the royal barge. There had been a time when Joreb had loved to be out on the water, fishing, playing, entertaining his wives, and especially spoiling Herezah with the freedom that the river afforded her. But in his later years Joreb had lost interest—his appetite for more perverted pastimes with her overrode those simple pleasures. His outdoor physical activity as he aged was riding his beloved stallions or riding her. His health dwindled, his girth increased and his colouring lost that glow, turning sallow, whilst
his breath turned bad. His once faithful adherence to frequent bathing disappeared and there were times when Herezah felt the need to hold her breath and count just to get through the few minutes it required the old Zar to spend himself inside her. But what never diminished in Joreb was his sharp mind and this was something she had always appreciated, always learned from.

She’d forgotten just how beautiful the royal barge was and how elegant a means of travel it offered on the pristine river waters. Salmeo was quiet this afternoon, she noticed, not his usual effeminate self, whispering and lisping at her. He was silent and withdrawn. She could understand this for she too had turned inward, appreciating the quiet as the great black eunuch steered them gently forward. They would not travel very far from the main palace area. The Galinsean party would be accompanied first by their own soldiers, who would hand responsibility to unarmed Elim near the palace at a predetermined docking spot. There, Angeline and her single servant would board a barge and travel upriver, carefully watched but not followed and not accompanied by anyone. No Percherese guards were permitted near either barge. It was intended that Angeline and her companion would join Herezah on the royal vessel via a special bridging platform that would be placed between the two craft.

Herezah rehearsed her welcome silently. She kept recalling her odd dream and the vision of the
large woman in a voluminous dress unsuitable for the Percherese climate, her overly painted face having its make-up leached by the wind and the sun as well as her own perspiration as her size and the oppressive summer warmth took their toll.

By contrast Herezah imagined herself as appearing cool and calm. Her silks were so lightweight she could barely feel them and her hair was pinned expertly by Elza and clasped by the emerald circlet, a massive teardrop jewel resting on the middle of her forehead. Herezah’s complexion was slightly olive and flawless—she had worked hard to maintain it and required no paint on her face, save some lip colour in a shade of soft ruby. She knew she had never looked more exotic or more dazzling, not even on the day of her wedding to Joreb. Today she felt like a queen. Today she would act like one.

‘What if she doesn’t like the food we’ve brought?’ she said, thinking aloud, not meaning to say it.

‘Fret not, Crown Valide. I don’t imagine much eating will take place this afternoon.’

‘The wine is chilled?’

‘A perfect temperature. I brought your favourite—a georkian from the north, sweet and plummy and filled with young fruity freshness. Your counterpart will enjoy it, I promise.’

‘And so will I, Salmeo,’ she replied. ‘Although water mine. I need a very clear head.’

‘I will prepare your goblet with special care,
Crown Valide. She will never know the difference.’

‘Thank you.’ She hadn’t meant to thank him. In fact, she’d made a pact with herself that she would never bow to Salmeo again.

‘I see them ahead, Crown Valide,’ Salmeo said quietly behind her. ‘I shall stop the barge now and anchor us.’

‘Go ahead,’ she said, mesmerised by the sight of the other barge drawing inexorably towards them. She could see no-one clearly yet and was glad that she was veiled.

Salmeo, surprisingly swift and light on his feet, had finished anchoring and tying up the royal barge. Now he moved alongside Herezah and awaited their guests.

‘I don’t see her,’ he said.

‘She is under the awning. Her servant is older than I imagined.’

‘Perhaps like you she felt more comfortable with someone she could trust. No warriors are required here, Crown Valide.’

‘You’re probably right. Old or not, he is certainly handsome, perhaps that’s the reason she chose him.’

‘I doubt it. Right now her concern would be receiving good counsel. No doubt this man has been chosen because he can listen into the conversation, advise her appropriately. Remember, Crown Valide, Queen Angeline will be just as nervous as you.’

Herezah didn’t turn but she received this as sage counsel. Salmeo was right. Presumably the queen was not in the habit of acting as an emissary, but Herezah was not convinced that Angeline was nervous, considering she held the upper hand. Nevertheless, Herezah accepted that Angeline was likely to be apprehensive.

‘I appreciate your wise words.’

She didn’t see him blink in what appeared to be irritation.

The second barge was almost upon them but still the queen remained in the shadows. Herezah regretted now that she herself had chosen to stand away from the awning of the royal barge; she was no doubt being studied by her counterpart. She had no choice but to hold her head high and her shoulders back, to ensure that the first impression she gave to those watching was one of bedazzling beauty and regal stature. She lifted her hand to the side of her face and, in a simple movement, dropped her veil. If she was on show then she might as well let Angeline see her in all her magnificent beauty. Herezah tried not to let the heat burn at her resolve to stand tall but it quietly niggled that the frumpy, large woman from her dreams had not yet emerged.

The boats were close enough to each other now that Herezah could properly make out the features of the servant who steered the barge for Angeline. He preferred to stand at the front,
unlike Salmeo who worked from the back. He was not especially tall but he was a broad, striking man with a pronounced jaw, no beard and a mane of hair.

He brought the barge to a standstill and Herezah could see a figure within the deepest shadows of the craft. The person remained seated, however, and Herezah found herself squinting from the sun. She wished with all her heart that she had thought this through more. She should have been the one with the sun behind her; she should have been the one to take her time. It was too late now. Salmeo was already quietly setting up the platform that would act as a bridge. She noted that the Galinsean servant did not move a muscle to help. In any other situation she would have been delighted to see the fat eunuch huffing and puffing over a menial task but at this moment she felt only indignation on his behalf.

She made a point of showing her displeasure the only way she could without giving offence. ‘Thank you so much, Grand Master Salmeo,’ she said, loudly enough for both Galinseans to hear her and his title. Swallowing hard, Herezah took a deep breath, her back to her guests, before she turned and fixed them with a bright smile, one that showed off her perfectly white teeth, not often seen in and around the palace.

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