Authors: C. Gockel,S. T. Bende,Christine Pope,T. G. Ayer,Eva Pohler,Ednah Walters,Mary Ting,Melissa Haag,Laura Howard,DelSheree Gladden,Nancy Straight,Karen Lynch,Kim Richardson,Becca Mills
Claire hurried along beside me, completely oblivious to my haste. Staring at the ring, she was smiling widely. “My dad is going to die when he sees this,” she said. That thought brought me to a dead stop. Claire bumped into the back of me. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Let’s not talk about your dad right now,” I suggested.
“Good idea,” she agreed. “Let’s go tell Tyler and Lana, though. I’ve got to tell somebody!”
In my excitement to finally propose to Claire, I had completely forgotten that we would actually have to tell her dad. I wouldn’t take the ring back for anything, but I really didn’t relish the thought of showing it to Thomas. As we wound our way back to the club, I wondered what the chances were of convincing Claire not to tell her dad and just elope with me after her birthday.
H
er piercing scream
swept over the ranch. The sheep in the pasture froze and looked up at me, but I was already sprinting away from them. I knew where she would be. Feeding the horses was her favorite chore, and she always saved it for last.
The old split-rail fences blurred past me as I ran. Desert sand swirled around my feet, trying to trip me with every step. Harsh, grating growls pushed me forward. Another desperate shriek rang out again and I lost all other thought as I flew around the corner of the barn. Cold numbed my legs, and I stumbled to a stop in front of the barn. What I saw slowed time and sent my fear soaring into the sky.
Holding my mom’s leg in its jaw, a mountain lion snarled at our ranch hand, Hale. The pitchfork he was waving at it was doing nothing to scare it away. Blood streamed out of the gashes running up and down my mom’s calf. Crimson streaks ran from the open door of the barn to where the cougar held her now, a good ten feet away. Ignoring Hale entirely, the creature looked desperate to carry her off.
No, I can’t lose her too! I would not watch her die like I did my dad. I had to save her. My mind was locked in indecision. Rush in and I could make the animal panic and attack her even worse. Wait too long and the blood pooling on the ground would steal her life away. I had to do something. But what?
Unaware of my presence, the mangy animal was focused on the pitchfork. Hale made a lunge at the animal, trying to stab it, but the wiry and desperate animal swung its hips to the side in time to dodge the blow. The sudden jarring made my mom cry out in pain again, waking me from my terrified trance. The weakness in her voice shocked me. I had to move quickly.
Stepping carefully, I made my decision to approach the cougar. I needed a weapon of some kind first. Searching the ground around me, I saw the broken off end of a four by four wooden fence post sticking out of the ground. Hale had backed into it last week and I hadn’t gotten around to fixing it, yet. I moved slowly, wrapping my hands around the thick chunk of wood and tugged softly. It didn’t budge. I’d forgotten it was cemented in.
A quick survey of the ground showed me there was nothing else. I couldn’t try to draw it off without a weapon. It had to be the post. Gripping the wood harder, I jerked it down, breaking the post off the chunk of cement. I stared at the broken piece of wood. It broke so easily. I didn’t expect that to actually work. The mountain lion was too occupied with trying to survive to hear the splitting of wood, but Hale stared at the post in my hand. The shock on his face was disturbing.
Ignoring Hale, I looked back at the animal. I was ready now. I took a step toward the beast holding my mom. I felt my muscles tense as I drew closer. I had no idea what it might do. The cougar was skin and bones, starving most likely, which explained why it had risked coming into town. That made it even more dangerous than usual. Moving up, I took a risk and kicked a rock at it, drawing its attention to me. I braced myself in case it decided to attack.
Instead of attacking or making a run for it, the cougar froze. Dropping my mom’s leg from its jaws, it sank down to its belly and started whimpering. Hale straightened and stared at the cougar in disbelief. I wasn’t sure what it was doing either, but I wasn’t going to stand there and wait for it to change its mind. Reaching into the barn, my fingers closed around the stock of a shotgun kept there for exactly this reason. I held it out of view while I spoke to Hale.
“Hale, get my mom. Get her away from the mountain lion,” I said.
“Uriah, how did you do that?” Hale asked.
“I don’t know,” I whispered harshly. “Just get my mom out of here!”
Hale opened his mouth again to say something, but my mom’s broken sobs kept him from finishing. Letting the pitchfork fall to the ground, Hale reached down and carefully scooped my mom into his arms. Both eyes on the cowering animal, Hale stepped back toward the barn. I watched him set my mom down in one of the empty stalls out of the corner of my eye. The rest of my focus remained on the animal. Shaking on the ground, it looked too terrified to move.
Bringing the gun up, I leveled it at the animal. At this distance it would be nothing at all for me to kill it. It needed to be done, but the way it mewled and groveled held me back. Cougars did not act like this, not even ones that were starving. It was acting like a dog waiting for its master to reprimand it. The miserable animal actually looked as if it were expecting me to punish it for attacking my mom, as if it were aware it had done something wrong. It should have been attacking me, or at the very least, running off as fast as it could.
“You have to do it,” Hale said from behind me.
“I know. It’s just…” I wasn’t even sure what it was that was holding me back. The cougar had attacked my mom.
“It’s tasted human flesh, Uriah. It has to be put down or it will come back and attack again. You know that. We’ve seen it before.” Hale’s words were cold, but he looked relieved that it was me holding the gun instead of him.
“Why is it just lying there?” I asked, just as much to myself as to Hale. He merely shrugged and looked back at my mom. It didn’t matter. I had to do it. Bracing the butt of the gun against my shoulder, I fired.
The cougar barely moved. It simply sank down deeper into the dirt as blood darkened the sand around it. It had to be done. I knew it was true, but I couldn’t feel quite right about the way it had just sat there waiting for it to happen. I didn’t have time to think too hard about it, though. Tossing the gun to Hale, I rushed to my mom’s side. Breathing slowly, if shallowly, she had fallen into unconsciousness. Her dark skin looked pale and was shimmering with sweat. Glancing down at her leg, the bleeding looked like it was slowing, but the dirt and grime caked on it was undoubtedly going to lead to infection.
“Hale, go get Sophia. I’ll get my mom into the house,” I said.
Hale nodded and ran off toward the driveway.
Usually Sophia’s blend of modern nursing and traditional Native American healing was all we needed here in San Juan Pueblo. I hoped it would be enough today. It hadn’t been enough for my dad, but there was nothing anyone could have done then. Cradling my mom in my arms, I started out of the barn. The dead cougar caught my eye and made my stomach churn, but I turned away and rushed to the house.
The old screen door clattered back against the frame as I laid my mom on the couch. She wouldn’t be happy about the blood stains that were quickly forming. There was nothing to be done about that now. Panic was trying to work its way into my mind, but I had taken care of enough injured or sick animals to know what to do. Gathering a bowl of warm water and several washcloths, I started cleaning her leg.
Swollen puncture wounds ran up and down her calf. Each stroke I made elicited a moan or twitch of pain. I cringed along with her and hoped Sophia would get here soon. Rinsing my mom’s leg one last time, I set the bowl aside and stroked her hair while I waited for Sophia to arrive. Thankfully the door banged open a few seconds later.
“How’s she doing?” Sophia asked as she pushed me out of the way.
“I cleaned the wounds, but she’s still asleep.” I wasn’t sure whether or not Sophia actually heard me. She was too busy inspecting my mom’s leg and digging through her medical bag. I held my mom’s hand as I watched Sophia spread ointment over her leg and wrap it carefully in layers of bandages. Flinching as she slid a needle into my mom’s arm, I had to look away as the pain relieving fluid was sent into her veins. Memories of my father’s last minutes tried to assault me. I made myself push them away.
“Get a pillow and put it under her leg,” Sophia said. Placing her supplies back in her bag as I got the pillow, Sophia checked my mom’s pulse again. “Just let her sleep for now,” she said. “She needs to rest.”
“You don’t think we need to take her to the hospital?” I asked.
Sophia huffed and shook her head. “You think she would actually go?”
My mom never liked hospitals or doctors, but after my dad died, she pretty much refused to go near any kind of medical building. “She can’t object if we take her while she’s still asleep,” I said.
“I’m afraid waking up in a hospital would be too traumatic for her,” Sophia said. My hands tightened with worry and Sophia’s expression softened. She knew better than anyone what losing my mom would do to me. She had been there for us after my dad died, and she still blamed herself for not being able to save him.
“Uriah, she’s going to be okay. I’ll send Hale down to the pharmacy for some antibiotics to keep her from getting an infection. Plus, I called Dr. Harrell in Santa Fe on my way over. He’s going to come out and check for any nerve or tendon damage. He should be here in half an hour. If he thinks there’s a problem, I’ll make sure your mom goes to the hospital right away. I promise.” Sophia took my free hand in hers and squeezed it tightly. “She’s going to be okay. From where the bites are, I don’t think there’ll be any lasting damage.”
I let out a breath that had been trapped behind a wall of anxiety. A nurse pracitioner, Sophia often said she was a poor excuse for a doctor, but she handled everything on the reservation from colds to broken bones. If she thought my mom was going to be okay, I trusted her judgment. She had dealt with worse.
“Where is Hale?” I asked. Sophia had mentioned wanting to send him for a prescription, but he hadn’t come back in with her.
“He’s out taking care of the mountain lion,” Sophia said. Her eyes drifted toward the back of the house just as mine did. I was glad I wouldn’t have to take care of the carcass myself. Just thinking about it made me shiver.
“Hale told me about what happened, how the animal just cowered down when you walked up,” Sophia said. Her appraising eyes bored into me. “Is that really what happened?”
I shrugged and nodded. “I don’t know what was wrong with it,” I said. “One minute it was trying to drag my mom away then it just dropped her and started whimpering.”
“I’ve never heard of a mountain lion acting like that before,” Sophia said.
“It looked like it was starving or something. There must have been something wrong with it,” I said. It made sense, but for some reason that didn’t fit either. At least Hale didn’t say anything about the post I snapped in half. Maybe it was the tribal stories my mom told me as a child until I knew them all by heart, or maybe it was the trauma of what had just happened, but the memory of the animal hung in my mind like a warning.
I knew what really bothered me about it. It was one more thing to add to Claire’s list of strange things that happened around me. That and breaking the post off. I knew I shouldn’t have been able to do that. Claire hadn’t been able to give me any insight about the letter, but maybe there would be some story or legend she’d read that would explain these. I shook my head. Was I really looking to myths to explain things in real life? I don’t think that was what my dad meant when he said the tribal legends would help me.
Sophia studied me as I thought for a few seconds before shaking away any more thoughts of the animal. “I’ll stay with her, Uriah. Why don’t you go get ready? You can’t go to the Elders looking like that. You’re covered in blood.”
Looking down at my ruined work clothes, I realized I had completely forgotten about the Elders. “I can’t go now,” I said, “not after what just happened. I need to stay with her.”
Sophia stared me down, refusing to waver. “Your mother will have your hide when she wakes up if you don’t go. You know she doesn’t want you and Claire to have to wait until next year.”
I started to object, but Sophia cut me off. “After everything that’s happened in the past few months, your mom could use some good news. She needs something happy in her life right now. Now, go get ready. I’ll take care of her while you’re gone.”
My eyes lingered on my mom’s still body. She had already been through so much. She wanted this almost as much as Claire and I did. She did need something to bring her some joy. Sophia was right. She was more than capable of taking care of my mom, and speaking with the Elders was sure to bring the good news we both wanted and needed to hear. I should have been comforted by that idea, but I walked back to my bedroom consumed by the memory of the animal.
T
homas Brant’s
eyes bored into me as I walked down the street toward the hundred year old adobe mud-brick building. I knew I would feel my father’s absence today, but I had at least hoped my mom would be here to help me through this. Now, I didn’t even have that. Asking the Elders for permission to marry on tribal lands was an outdated ritual, but sweat had my traditional homespun shirt and doeskin pants clinging to my body. Facing Thomas alone today was not how I’d hoped this would go. Breaking eye contact with Thomas, I straightened to my full height and walked toward him, determined to make him see me as a man.
Claire smiled worriedly at my arrival. Her father’s grimace deepened, and he held her arm more tightly against his body. He wasn’t anywhere close to happy about this. Sarah and my mom had insisted that we meet with the Elders today. Thomas flat out refused, balking at even consider letting us get married. I honestly thought our moms could convince him. He was a stubborn man, though.
I still wasn’t sure I believed in Claire’s ideas about me, but I had been willing to put her theory to the test for this. After listening to hours of arguing from Thomas I finally stood and walked right up to him. My entire body had felt like it was about to crumble from the fear gripping me. I could only hope Claire was right.
Thomas seemed to think she was. I had pushed Thomas to give in before, and I think he saw what was coming. He tried to back away, but I caught his arm and held him. In plain words, I told him that Claire and I were getting married and there was nothing he could do about it. He tried to fight it. His mouth moved, trying to get out the words he wanted to say, but all that came out was a deflated “fine.” Sarah’s jaw dropped and Claire gave me a look that said, “What took you so long?” She never doubted I could change his mind. The real surprise, though, was the smug look on my mom’s face. It was almost like she knew I could do it just as surely as Claire did. That brought my dad’s letter to mind immediately, but Claire’s excited had hug pushed it back out just as quickly.
The sharp bark of a stray dog was immediately followed by the screeching mewl of a cat, tearing me out of my thoughts. Turning to see the pair barreling toward us, I stepped back, not wanting to get in their way. Thomas darted back in disgust. He hated animals almost as much as he hated me. Claire just smiled at the display. About to catch the cat, the dog yapped eagerly, then, for no apparent reason, they both slowed to a stop and stood staring at me.
My eyebrows rose in surprise. I had always had a calming touch with animals, as long as I wasn’t touching Claire at the same time, but this seemed odd even for me. And eerily familiar. The two animals stood within two feet of each other, but the fight had completely drained out of them. The dog sniffed a few times then turned away and scampered off in the direction it had come. Winding itself around my legs twice, the cat then headed in the opposite direction. What was going on with the animals around here? Thoughts of the dead mountain lion rolled around in my mind, bringing back that sickening feeling.
Thomas just snorted at the odd display and went back to glaring at me. Whatever was happening with the animals would have to wait. I had to face Thomas and the Elders first. My palms began to itch, and my clothes seemed much too tight under his gaze. Claire’s bright face had the opposite effect. Her dark eyes were warm and kind. Her hands smoothed her dress, though it already looked perfect. I had never seen her wear the beaded ceremonial frock before. Her mother must have surprised her with the new clothing, just as mine had done.
She looked so beautiful. I couldn’t pry my eyes away from her. Her silky brown hair shifted in a soft breeze and her fingers came up to brush it away. I loved her chestnut hair. It was incredible how her hair color matched her eyes so perfectly. Her eyes were absolutely amazing, capable of capturing me and holding me in their gaze forever. I felt all of my nervousness fall away immediately. Shaking her father’s protective hand away when I finally reached them, Claire ran to me, wrapping her arms around my body.
“Uriah, we heard about your mom. How’s she doing? Sophia said she thought she would be okay, but we’ve all been worried,” Claire said.
“She was still sleeping when I left. Hale picked up some medicine for her, though, and Dr. Harrell finished checking her over right before I came,” I said. “That’s why I was late. I didn’t want to leave before I knew she was going to be all right. Sorry for making you wait.”
Shaking her head, Claire brushed away my apology. “Don’t apologize. Your mom is more important. I wasn’t sure you would even want to go through with this today.” Her eyes came up to mind, concern filling them. “We can wait if you want. We don’t have to do this today.”
“No,” I said quickly, “I don’t want to wait. Nothing will help my mom recover quicker than having a wedding to plan.”
Claire smiled, but it was tinged with sadness. Taking her chin in my hand, I tilted her face up to look at me. “She’ll be okay,” I said. “Dr. Harrell said there wouldn’t be any permanent damage. Let’s just try to focus on seeing the Elders for now.”
“We’ll give her the good news together as soon as we’re done with the Elders then,” Claire said confidently. “She’ll be so excited.”
I loved Claire so much. She had stuck by me through more than I could have asked, and always did it with such love and compassion. I would never have survived the last couple months without her. The desire to kiss her and show her just how much I loved her was overwhelming. As usual, her angry father glaring at me over her shoulder held me back.
Not wanting to anger Thomas any further than was absolutely necessary, I embraced Claire carefully. Her face turned up to look at mine, faith that everything would be okay shining in her eyes. Her soft hair cascaded down her back, tickling my hands like tiny feathers, bringing a slight smile to my lips. The black sweep of her eyelashes touched her cheeks as she closed her eyes and reached up to kiss my cheek.
I reveled in her touch, but the heat from her father’s stare stiffened my body. Why couldn’t her mom have come instead? Tradition. My mom had only gotten permission to come with me because my dad wasn’t alive to present me. I ground my teeth, wishing this tradition would miraculously die out in the next few minutes.
Claire’s lips pursed at my reaction, her eyes opening and turning back to her father. “He’s going to have to get used to this eventually,” she said.
“He will,” I replied, “but let’s not push our luck right now.” Refraining from returning her kiss, I hugged her tightly, pulling her close to my body.
Leaning her head against my chest, Claire spoke quietly. “Are you nervous, Uriah?”
“Yes,” I said honestly. Her brow crinkled, and I felt the need to clarify. “I just wish my mom and dad could have been here with me. I don’t want the Elders to look at me and think I’m just a kid.”
Claire pulled back a little, looking me in the eyes. “I doubt anyone would look at you and think you were anything but a man.”
I knew she was talking about my physical appearance, but the Elders would surely consider much more. In some ways, I knew why Claire’s father wanted me to walk away. I should have been planning to leave for college in a few weeks like Tyler and Lana. Thomas knew I was going to stay here and get started on my Pre-Vet degree online. He was less than thrilled with the prospect of me sticking around for another year. I don’t know if he thought I was weak for not going, or not serious enough about becoming a veterinarian because I was doing it from my laptop, but he looked at me like a piece of scum more than ever since finding out.
Thomas had most likely been hoping that in the year it would take Claire to finish high school, she would forget about me and move on. I think he knew it would take more than distance to break our relationship, but he had still hoped. Thomas wished she had chosen just about anyone but me. His money gave him power, but being the grandson of the last Tewa Chief made him very prideful of his family name. I think he thought of himself as the unofficial chief of our tribe. My only guess was that he thought the chief’s daughter deserved better than me. He did not want her marrying a rancher.
The creaking of a wooden door banished any more guesses about why Thomas despised me. Wauneta Begay emerged from the building, her face serene. Wauneta’s husband had passed away last winter in a car accident. Married less than a year, she was devastated. Moving on had seemed impossible to her at the time, but slowly she came to accept his passing. Because she and my mom were friends I knew that she had been planning to consult the Elders about ending her mourning. The discussion must have gone well. I was glad to see her smiling again.
Watching Wauneta, Claire squeezed my hand. “Are you ready?”
“Yes,” I said. Glancing at Claire’s father, I watched his face twist in agony. I couldn’t help smiling at his pain. “Is your dad?”
A quick giggle brought her hand to her mouth. Her father stood, his fists clenched and clamped to his sides. “Like I said, he’ll get used to it eventually,” Claire said.
“I sure hope so.”
Leaving his perch, Thomas held his hand out to his daughter. “Claire, you will enter with me.”
Sighing, Claire released her grip on me and walked over to her dad. Her brilliant smile did nothing to improve his mood, but it lifted away any uneasiness I felt. How could the Elders reject our petition? I followed my love into the Council House, sure of our future.
The foyer seemed much too dark after coming in from the noonday sun. I stood blinking my eyes, waiting for them to adjust before attempting to walk any further. The last thing I wanted to do was embarrass myself by tripping over a table or stepping on someone’s foot. Slowly, the dim light of the wall fixtures reached my eyes. A young man stood next to the doors leading to the main chamber, a bored expression on his face. Claire stopped next to her dad, though she had little chance of going anywhere else.
Holding her hand so tightly that Claire’s fingertips were a deep red, Thomas Brant looked straight ahead. Claire was pretending not to notice him as she glanced around the room casually. I followed her lead. I had never been in the Council House before. The walls were covered in a thick plaster that was surprisingly still in very good condition for its age. Beautiful pottery, weavings, Kachina dolls, and sand paintings decorated almost every inch of the space. Many of the items were Tewa Indian artifacts, but others were from neighboring tribes. The collection was breathtaking.
“Thomas Brant, Uriah Crowe, you may go into the main chamber to speak with the Elders now,” the young man said.
He waved us forward. I paused, letting Thomas lead. Having no parent to present me to the council, I would not move in front of him. Smirking at the allowance, he stepped forward grandly. I took a deep breath and tried very hard to ignore him. Moving confidently, I followed Thomas into the main chamber.
The five Elders of our tribe sat against the opposite wall. Their high backed chairs had held the Elders of San Juan Pueblo for many generations. The hard oak table that stretched in front of them had been smoothed and polished by age. Three men sat on the council, Tansin Amory, Dale Hatch, and Samuel Atcity. Nestled between the men were the two female council members, Anise Yazzie and Quaile Faimin, our tribe’s shaman. Quaile stared at our group with dark searching eyes. She would be the one to answer our petition. Her eyes were fixed on me now, bright and intent under heavy, wrinkled lids. My heart sped up, my composure beginning to crack.
Quaile leaned forward and spoke. “How is your mother doing, Uriah? Mrs. Brant informed us of the attack.”
Some people hated small towns for the fact that everybody knew your business, but I actually found it comforting. Not surprised that they had already heard about it, I answered quickly. “Sophia is taking very good care of her, and Dr. Harrell has already seen her and said there won’t be any lasting damage to her leg.”
Every member of the Council nodded in relief. Quaile’s compassion disappeared quickly, though. “I’m glad to hear Lina will be alright. You are not here to discuss your mother, however. Let us move on with this proceeding.” Placing her hands on the table in front of her, Quaile stared at me. “Why have you come before the Council this day?” Quaile asked, although she already knew the answer. She seemed as eager about this as Thomas did.
Grudgingly, Thomas stepped forward. “I, Thomas Brant, come before you to present my daughter, Claire Brant. She asks permission to marry Uriah Crowe.”
Quaile nodded and turned to me.
“I, Uriah Crowe, come before the Elders to ask permission to marry Claire Brant.” I stepped back again, glancing at Quaile before bowing my head respectfully. Her gaze lingered on me again. Her mouth turned down in a frown. Sweat seemed to spring from every pore in my body. I fervently hoped no one would notice.
“I must consider your request,” Quaile said. Closing her eyes, her whole body relaxed. The age she carried visibly lessened. Her face smoothed as her gaze turned upward.
My mother had told me that Quaile’s visions could last a few seconds, or take hours. I didn‘t actually believe in Quaile’s ability to see the future any more than I believed in most of the tribal myths my mom and dad had taught me as a child, but tradition was important to them and I would not shame my parents by mocking it.
To me, however, it shouldn’t have taken more than a second to know that Claire and I were meant for each other. For everyone around us, never mind her father, it was easy to see. I had loved Claire since before I was even old enough to understand the concept, and could imagine myself with no one else. I knew she felt the same about me.
Quickly, I stole a glance at Claire. She watched the shaman with hopeful eyes. I smiled at her eagerness. Afraid of nothing, she was always the first to try something new. Her wild spirit bounced against my sensible self, forcing me to grow and expand just to keep up with her. Her face turned to me unexpectedly, beautiful and confident. She reached for my hand. Unsure whether it was appropriate or not for me to take it, I hesitated. Her smile widened, encouraging me. I took her hand, feeling only her confidence radiate into my body this time.