Good for Now (Book One of The Now Series) (6 page)

Chapter 14

Kevin

I stop by the front desk to ask for directions to the beach, waiting for Nadine. I look around the loggia to see a younger looking Julie sitting alone, wearing a swimsuit coverup. Thinking she could give me directions to the beach. Nadine did say them earlier but I forgot them.

"Sorry to bother you," I say, the girl looks up, then smiles.

"Hi, no bother, how can I help?" she asks.

I can't help but pull the chair next to her and sit down, "Well, it's busy at the front desk, I just need directions to the ocean. I’d thought you may know because you’re wearing a swimsuit.” I say, taken back by her beauty. She could not be older than 19 or 20.

"Sure, I'm actually going that way...I was meeting my parents, but I don't know where they are. Let me text them and we can go."

I swallow hard, "No, that is OK, directions will be fine, and your parents will we worried."

She looks straight at me, It's fine, really, I mean I am an adult, just turned 18 last month. It's fine."

Man. she is younger than I thought, and thank God she is an adult, but barely, this could have turned to be ugly.

"Well, lets see what they say after you text them."

"It's OK. So do you want to go to the beach or not. Cause I am going."

"Yeah. see I'm ready," I say, holding up my bags.

"Is someone meeting you, cause you have more than one towel, one is pink...do you have a girlfriend?"

"No...not at the moment, my sister may come by, but she has private matters to tend to. Anyway, shall we go?"

"Yes."

I look at her as she walks ahead, her legs are tone, tanned and I can't help think how they would feel wrapped around me, warm and tight. I turn away to think there is still time for me to return back to the inn, there is an innocence to her, each time she looks at me she blushes, being playful, and I feel like she likes me. But just when I think I need to return she turns around to give me this smile, that blows away my reason. She is a lovely girl, one made of dreams. I can't let this dream slip away, it’s just a little slip, nothing to be ashamed off.

"Hurry up...I told my parents I'd be back in forty minutes."

"Alright, I'll pick up the pace," I say, walking right next to her. She touches my shoulder, her fingers just sink into me, I feel weak, wanting to look in her eyes, but that would be too dangerous.

"Are you staying in the inn with your parents?" I ask.

"No, I live in the UCLA dorms, they are visiting me from New York," she says.

"What is your name?" I ask.

"Allison, but you can call me Ali."

I smile, "hello Ali," I say, she leans into me, being playful as she holds on to my arm like we are together.

"What's you name? No, don't tell me, let me guess."

Ali is quite playful now, there’s something more than meets the eye with her.

"Is it Zach?'

"No, but my mother almost named me Zach."

"How about Donald?"

"Not quite but.."

"It's Jim, short for James."

"I like James better, is it alright if I call you James because Jim is my father's name."

Is she for real? I mean if she is, I am playing with fire, but I could be psyching myself out.

"Here we are," Ali says, then she runs, yelling, "catch me if you can”. Taking her coverup off as she runs to the ocean water. Her body is one lean machine, no parts of her need fixing.

I drop the beach bag, next to Ali's coverup in the sand, I look at it, pick it up feeling how soft and warm it is. I can help but to brush it against my cheeks, inhaling a fresh smell of perfume. I look up to see Ali swimming, waving for me to come in. I rush in the water, Ali gives me a long look.

"This is heaven, being in the water, ah..."

I just smile, admiring her beauty and boldness, "So do you come here often?" I ask.

"When I can, you know being here with you is fun," she says, splashing water my way.

"Fun, it is," I say. smiling, finding humor in the way she said fun. I can't remember the last time I used the word. "So what do you like to do for fun Ali?"

"Lots of things."

"There must be something that is top of the list," I ask.

“Well, I like kissing," she says, looking from the corner of her eye.

I blush, did she just make a move on me? I feel under the spotlight; sweat dripping down my back. The subject matter was certainly opening the way for things beyond kissing.

"Well, that is fun. So what do you like about it?" I ask, giving her a chance for her to talk more and for me to test the waters further with Ali. She was barely an adult, she just turned 18.

Ali bobs up and down, her breasts barely fitting in her bikini top, driving me mad with desire to feel them, thinking of ways to touch them and folic them. For someone with a tiny frame, she sure has a rack, I wonder if they’re real.

"I don't know how to explain it, but I just like it."

I get closer to her and just as I am about to touch her, she goes under, so I can't see her. Then I feel her hands on my legs, slowly rising to my face. She is so fuckening beautiful, I just can't stand it.

"I'll just have to show you," Ali says, as she leans into me. Our lips touching, my arms around her waist, pull her against my chest. Her breasts against mine; she lets out a moan, then we kiss. Her mouth and mine open until we both let up for air. It's like we are long lost lovers, seeing each other after months apart.

"That was nice Ali, real nice," I say, testing the waters, I just wanted to be in her now. I couldn't stand being so close to her and not feeling her tight lips wrapped around my cock. Fuck, I feel like a teenage boy, suffering from blue balls.

"Yes, it was, look I got to go," Ali says.

I sigh, realizing Ali was like Julie.

A fucken tease.

I believe there’s a sex fiend in every woman. Some don't realize this until they stumble up on it, or until they come across a man who rocks their worlds. A man who makes them realize the best thing in life is a penis.

When I first saw Julie, she was unbelievably shy. Fuck, if fate had not had our paths cross, the many times it did. There wouldn’t be an us now, and if I hadn’t been direct as I was, there wouldn’t be an us either.

In my directness, I pulled the sex fiend from her, one that was quite frisky and adventurous. Our sex was hot, and I was one satisfied beast.

But once we became a couple, Julie became sexually shy; and too self conscious when I wanted us to try new positions, yet I still found her incredibly sexy. Some days I have a hard time being around her, because I want her, but she shuns me, telling me she’s tired. So I look elsewhere.

I count my lucky stars that she hasn't left me, after finding out about my past cheats. It was that evening when Greta was born; after she spoke about struggling with sex. I suggested she become another person during sex. It has worked so far and we are having more sex, yet I feel like I am cheating with Julie.

Chapter 15

Julie

Two hours later I wake up. I check my phone to see if he called or text, but nothing.

I hurry to get my suit on, put my hair in a ponytail, then apply sun screen on my face, before getting on my cover up on. Put on my sunglasses and baseball cap and I am set to go. Seeing that he beach bag is gone, Kevin must’ve taken it. Nice, I think, less for me to carry.

Walking by the front desk, I see Nadine. She is intently studying a piece of paper, looking like an invoice, then looks at the computer and then again at the paper.

I glance at her again, thinking how dumb I was thinking there was something going between Kevin and her. I had this feeling she was pretty much running the inn.

Maybe Kevin was not the first person she asked the milk question, but rather he was the only one who acted on it. Nadine was just being nice to him because she needed to get the refrigerator fixed. Maybe there was no real flirting on her part. Nadine needed something and she did what she needed to get it. I felt a sense of relief, again my mind was probably creating something that wasn’t really true. I sort of liked Nadine now. She was a woman who created her own opportunities.

"Hi Nadine, you truly run a tight ship here, studying that paper of yours."

She turns to look at me like I’m a ghost, "Oh, hi Julie, I thought you were at the beach. I could have sworn I saw you walk out with Kevin earlier. I must be losing my mind because you are here.”

I feel like I have been hit on the back, finding it hard to breathe.

"Oh, no, I stayed in the room. For some reason I got a headache earlier, and Kevin went to the beach alone.”

Nadine smiles and there is this silence between us. Just as I am about to walk off. Nadine talks.

"That is right, I must have thought I saw Kevin with you, when I probably saw the newlyweds Marshals walk off to the beach. Silly me, stress has been playing tricks with my seeing lately.’

“Stress has played games with me too.”

“I have aspirins if you need one,” Nadine says.

“I’m good, the headache is gone, and I am ready for the beach. Can't wait to get in the water."

Nadine smiles, “Well, have fun."

"I will.”

I realize I had Nadine wrong, she actually is a nice person.

“I hope I see you and Kevin later at the BBQ.”

“We’ll be there,” I say.

“I’ll save a table for you two,” Nadine says.

“Did you say I should follow the path just out the gate?”

“Yes, take a left and it will take you to the beach. I’d walk with you, but I am still waiting for Mary the slash hostess, slash housekeeper to return. I don’t know where she ran off to.”

“I’ll be on my way.”

Walking down the narrow path, I take in the fresh air and sun. It’s easy to see why songs were written about California; the streets are lined with character and there is certainly an energy about the place.

When I arrive at the beach, I see Kevin. He is suntanning, I pick up the pace wanting to be with him, feeling secure about our relationship, until I see a pair of pink flip flops next to his black pair. I stop to look around not seeing a girl around, but I know this doesn't mean she isn't still around, or wasn't around. Maybe she saw me and is hiding.

“Hi.”

“Kevin keeps his eyes closed. “Hey”

“Whose flip flops are these?" I ask, holding them in my hand, holding my breath trying not to get worked up.

"Oh, I found them here," he says, as he opens his eyes to sit up.

"Really?" I say, looking around the beach once again. Again I see no one.

Relax, I tell myself. Maybe he did just find them here.

"So how is your headache? Do you still feel dizzy?" Kevin asks.

How did he know I was dizzy? I don't remember telling him so.

"Good, still feeling a little lightheaded, not sure why. Maybe it’s because of the time difference, let’s not forget that it’s four hours behind in California."

"Julie, I was thinking about the wedding."

"You have?"

"Yes, we shouldn't drag the engagement out, let's get married in the fall.”

I keep quiet, there never seemed like an urgency to get engaged, and now he wants to get married in the next few months.

“Why so sudden?” I ask.

“I think we have waited too long to get married, and why not?”

Again I am floored by his response.

"I have to see if that’s even possible," I say.

"Anything is possible."

"True, but I always dreamt of a fairytale wedding Kevin. You knew that.“

"I thought you were out of that phase, listen, I have been here all day, the sun is getting to me. I feel a headache come on. I’m going back to the inn.”

“I was hoping we could go in the water together. Maybe even go skinny dipping.”

I take off my cover-up, hoping he’ll like what he sees. His reaction doesn’t change. It’s like I didn’t take it off. Usually he has his hands on me by now.

“Not today, I’m going back to take a nap. My head keeps pounding. I need to get out of the sun.” He leans down and kisses me on the cheek. I purposely don't turn my cheek wanting him to kiss me on the lips but he doesn't.

“I wish you didn’t have a headache.”

“So do I.”

Kevin gets up and puts on his t-shirt.

“Well, rest up so we can go to the BBQ later. I spoke to Nadine as I was leaving the inn and she said she’d save us a table," I say, hoping to change the mood.

“We’ll see.”

Kevin bends down to pick up the pink flip flops like their his. And he doesn't even give me a second look. It takes all I have not to ask why he is taking them. Still my question is If he didn't know whose flips they were, why take them?

Could he have possibly meet someone in the time I slept? Maybe he saw an intern he slept with in the past, and Nadine was right when she saw him walking out to the path earlier with a person who looked like me. Or maybe he is with Mary, the slash hostess, slash housekeeper. Nadine did say she disappeared somewhere. I just feel that something isn’t right.

I also remember it’s not his fault that he’s handsome and charming. It’s not his fault that God made him this way, and it’s not his fault that he unknowingly can be an asshole.

I watch Kevin walk away to the path, with the pink flip flops dangling from his fingers, annoying the hell out of me, still watching until he disappears behind the brush of the walking path back to the inn. I feel like crying. I have this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach that he doesn’t want to be with me, and that he really doesn’t have a headache and he was going back to her.

I lay down, glancing at my stomach. It is flat and hungry. I keep my body in shape mostly for Kevin. I take pleasure when he touches me all over, yet it isn’t Julie he mentions as much as Greta. I am suddenly seeing the light. What about me? Greta is happy, but how about Julie? I’m not so sure. How can I switch places with her? How can I be confident like Greta without being her?

I get up from the towel and walk to the ocean, and Kevin is right. The water is freezing. I feel a little daring being in the rough waters, with the waves slamming into me, but I walk until I am submerged up to my shoulders. I start to swim around, my head out looking around making sure I am aware of my surrounding, and that there isn't a shark around. The once shockingly cold water feels good around my legs, my arms, my torso, causing my body to move and feel liberated.

I turn to look behind, to the endless ocean, tempted to go further out, almost not caring if a shark were to come, but the thought of my fantasy man stops me. He is telling me to stop, turn around and swim back to shore and I listen to him. Just as Kevin has created Greta, I have created one, but the difference is mine, he’s a fantasy. He is with me when Kevin isn’t.

Sitting on my towel, I stare out to the ocean again. It is darker than I remember it to be in Florida. I think what a miracle it truly is, how can its water just stop at shore without over flowing the earth.

I arrive at the shore, to find a text from Kevin, saying he really isn’t feeling good, “No need to rush back.” Kevin must really not be feeling well.

Laying back on the towel, I think of Candy Cop. He is my fantasy man, he is the one I think of when I please myself.

It's five thirty, time to go back to the inn. The thought of a hot shower, gets me going. The salty water has dried my skin, giving it an ashy look, and I feel itchy as well. Maybe Kevin will take a shower with me. I smile feeling risky, thinking how nice it would be if it could be Julie and Kevin in the shower, and not Greta and Kevin.

I look out to the ocean, the waves are really coming in now, pounding the shore. A nervous twitch comes over me, thinking if I hadn't come out when I did, I may have been taken out by a rip current and would have never returned to shore.

I begin to feel rain drops. Strange, the weather didn't call for rain. I start jogging to the path not wanting to get caught in the rain, but then it stops. I start walking again, taking a deep breath of relief.

I arrive at the inn’s gate tired. I see Nadine, buzzing around the front porch, tending to guests, seeing if they need a drink, with a glass pitcher of water and sliced lemons floating on the top in hand. I watch her smile to others, the same way she did to Kevin. I realize again, she was being who she was; Miss. Hospitality.

I look around for Kevin, thinking he may be lounging around with the other guests, but I still don’t see him anywhere. I walk up the steps, walk through the porch to the tiny lobby, there’s a family checking in. A little girl who must be around three looks my way, then smiles. I smile and wave at her. Her mom looks at me, and says, “Sara, must really like you. She never looks at strangers.”

“I like Sara, too. What a sweet girl she is.”

“Thank you, do you have children?”

“No, not yet, well have a great day. The beach is lovely,” I say, feeling nervous about the possibility.

“Mommy, let’s go to the beach,” Sara, pleads.

I walk away to the room. I hope Kevin's in the room.

I arrive at the front door, I lean in and hear nothing. I unlock the door to see Kevin asleep. I see he has taken a shower, a towel is wrapped around his waist, and his hair is wet. I should take a shower, but I lay next to him, wanting to be close to him, hoping the slight movement wakes him up, but all it does is cause him to take a deep breath.

I dare to move a little closer to him, yet we are still worlds away, because he’s asleep. I crave his touch but nothing. It is like a dead person is next to me. I thought this was suppose to be a passionate, lovemaking vacation, but so far the only person getting any action is Greta. I want him for myself. Tears silently stream down my cheeks, feeling so lonely and unwanted by the one person who I love. I close my eyes, emotional exhaustion is pulling me to sleep. Maybe it’s where I will see Kevin.