Good to Me (31 page)

Iesha looked in the bowl of lettuce, cucumbers, cherry tomatoes, and carrots and decided that they had enough cucumbers. “No,
but you can butter that bread over there.”

Within a matter of minutes, they were all sitting down for dinner. Iesha was proud of the kids, who were well behaved. They
didn’t fight. Sha-Lai didn’t ask a lot of questions, and Raquan ate like he had some sense. She was impressed with how good
Terrence was with them. He didn’t tire of their conversation and he balanced his attention among the three of them. She felt
an urge to apologize to him and to let him know she appreciated him.

After dinner, Iesha sent the kids to their rooms to get ready for school tomorrow and to take baths. She led Terrence to the
living room and they sat on the couch. She flipped through the television channels. “Do you like
The Jamie Foxx Show
?”

“I watch it sometimes.”

“There’s nothing else really on. Do you want to watch it?”

“Girl, just being in your presence is enough for me.”

She blushed and turned toward him. She pulled her legs up on the couch and let them rest behind her. “I need to apologize
to you.”

“No, you were right. I was trying to buy the kids’ affection.”

“But that doesn’t mean I can talk to you any kind of way. That was disrespectful.”

“You gone make me fall in love with you even more.”

Iesha could hear the shower running. That meant Sha-Lai was showering. Raquan only took baths. As long as there was a new
person in the house, Raquan would stay in his room from shyness. She put her hand on Terrence’s chest. “That’s what I want
you to do.” When he did not refuse her touch, she pushed herself up on her knees and eased backward into his lap. She slid
her body down on his so that she could rest her head on his neck and shoulder. He cradled her and planted warm kisses on her
cheek and neck. Her heart was beating as fast as her breathing rate. She pushed herself up on all fours and turned to face
him. She did not care that they were not married, they would soon be. Neither did she care about the kids being in the house.
She wanted to know what else God had in store for her. She put her hand under his shirt.

“Baby,” Terrence panted. “We can’t do this.” Iesha tried to kiss him again. He blocked her tongue with his. “I know you love
me. You don’t have anything to prove. We will not go into our marriage under a curse.”

Iesha wasn’t sure about what he was talking about, but she rested her head on his chest. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He patted her on the head and kissed her forehead. “Just promise that when it’s my turn of weakness, you’ll be
strong enough to stop me.”

“You better pray about that one.” Iesha scratched her head and said, “So you’re really going to make me wait?”

“You’re the one who wanted to wait.”

“Well, yeah,” she admitted. “We have to plan a wedding, reception, honeymoon. I need a dress. We need someone to take pictures.
Not to mention bridesmaids and groomsmen.”

“Would you be okay with a small, private ceremony? With just family and a few friends?”

“Yeah.”

“You just get a dress and, believe me, my mom will handle the rest. She used to do weddings. She still has all the decorating
stuff. We’ll ask her when we visit this weekend.”

“Okay.” She laid her head back on his chest.

She noticed a change in Terrence’s facial expression. “What?”

“I think we’d better wait that year out.”

“Now, you get me all excited and change your mind.”

“No, you were just talking about the kind of wedding you wanted and I downsized it. If that’s what you want, that’s what you
should have.”

“Ahhh, that’s sweet.”

“And besides,” he said slyly. “We can’t get married without premarital counseling.”

“I was thinking about that.”

“Do you mind if I call my pastor tomorrow and set something up?”

“Oh yes, please do.”

This time when she plopped her head on his chest, Terrence said, “Oh, no. I need to go home and take a cold shower.” He stood
up. “I’ll see you tomorrow evening.”

As if she was trying to make sure he dreamed about her, she kissed him in a way that he should remember for a long time.

EMMITT WAS GLAD FOR THE PEACE HE FINALLY HAD.
The phone had stopped ringing and people had stopped coming by. He needed to clear his mind. It had been a week since his
mother’s funeral and he was more distracted by his meeting Emmitt Chambers and by Charity’s hospitalization than he was about
his mother’s death. Everything he knew and believed about himself was a lie. He was even lying to himself about Charity. He
loved her and he wanted her back. He went to his closet and pulled down a footlocker. He sat opposite the opened chest on
the bed.

He remembered the day before Charity left home, she’d come home from work and found him on the back deck cooking on the charcoal
grill.

“You’re cooking?” she asked. He knew that she was surprised because they had both stopped cooking and weren’t even communicating
at that time.

“Yeah… our wedding pictures.”

Charity walked back in the house and momentarily returned with two picture frames. “Oh, you forgot these.” She took the photos
out of the frame and threw them on the open fire.

He’d tried to stop her, but he didn’t want her to discover he was lying. Knowing what time she would be getting home, he set
some newspapers on fire and told her that he was burning their wedding photos. Those photos along with their wedding video
were stored in the chest he was now looking through. He opened the handmade, white lace-covered photo album. He observed how
tenderly he had held her taking their first dance. The picture of them cutting the cake and laughing made him laugh too. He
remembered Charity daring him to smear cake in her face. They looked so happy in the pictures.
How did we let it get so bad?

In the family photos, he recognized that his mother looked happy for them. She proudly stood by his side in some, and lovingly
stood by Charity in others. He touched the photo as if he could touch his mother.
Life is too short
.
You never know when it’s your time
. Before he thought about what he was doing, he reached for the phone. He wanted to talk to Charity and he wanted another
chance. He dialed her number but hung up before it could ring. Wrestling with his thoughts, he dialed the number again, but
hung up before he could get an answer. He almost dropped the phone when it rang in his hand.

“Hello?”

“Emmitt? Were you trying to call me?” He was too startled to speak. “Emmitt?”

“Huhm,” he cleared his throat. “I’m here. I was just…”

“Are you okay?”

“Charity, we need to talk. There’s a whole lot of things I need to tell you—”

“And there’s—”

“I know,” he said, cutting her off. “I know there’s a lot of things you want to say to me. But I think if you let me talk
first, you won’t need to say half of what you think you want to say. I have some apologizing and explaining to do. I’d like
to talk in person.”

When she did not respond, he continued. “I know what you’re thinking. I’m not up to anything. I’m not trying to pull one over
on you. I just want to talk.”

“I’m not sure that this is a good time. I’ve only been recuperating for a few days. I’m not sure I can handle this right now.”

“Iesha called and told me about you being in the hospital.” He paused. “I feel so responsible for that. Charity, I’m so sorry
for all I’ve done. Can we please talk about this?”

“I can’t meet you halfway and I don’t feel comfortable having you in my house.”

“I know. I know.”

“Can’t we just talk on the phone?”

“I’d like to see you. I would like for us to talk face to face.”

She was silent for a moment. Emmitt wondered what she was thinking. “All right,” she said. “You want to talk? We’ll talk here.
For one hour and that’s it. What time will you be here?”

He looked at his watch. “It’s four o’clock now. I can be there by six thirty or seven.”

“I’ll see you then—”

“Thank you, Charity.”

“Don’t thank me just yet, Xavier will not be here when you get here.”

Although Emmitt did not agree, he could understand her limitations. “That’s fine, Charity. I just want to talk.”

“Good-bye, Emmitt.”

“Bye.”

He was so excited he felt like thanking God. He knew that Charity’s agreeing to meet with him was nothing short of a miracle.
He decided he’d leave the praying and talking to God to her. She was the preacher, not him. On the way out, he scanned his
CD case and grabbed Brian McKnight’s first album. When he got to the car, he slid the CD into the player and selected track
seven. “Never Felt This Way” used to be Charity’s favorite song. While making their wedding plans, Emmitt had convinced her
to walk down the aisle to a traditional here-comes-the-bride piece. But on their wedding day, he surprised her by having his
cousin serenade her with a rendition of “Never Felt This Way.” He remembered how she stopped in the aisle when she recognized
the instrumental chords to the song. Even from the altar where he stood, he could see the ceiling lights reflect her glistening
tears. He quieted his thoughts to listen to the words. Emmitt programmed the CD player to repeat the song and he listened
to it all the way to Charlotte. He turned down the volume so that he could rehearse what he would say to her.

“Charity, I’m sorry. I love you and I want us to be together again.”
That’s too simple
, he mused. “Charity. Please forgive me. I apologize for hurting you while we were married and afterward. I’ve been prideful
and selfish. Since Momma died, I realized that life is too short to be unhappy. Unhappiness killed her. I don’t want to die
that way. I love you and I’d like to work things out.”
Charity’ll never go for that. I’ll just say what’s in my heart when I get there
. He smacked his lips out of frustration. It was going to take a miracle and then some for him to pull this off. He was never
one to humble himself for risk of appearing weak. He needed some divine intervention and that meant he was going to have to
pray.

“Dear God,” he said aloud, sounding more like he was writing a letter. “I hate to be coming to You like this, but I need Your
help.” He looked out the passenger window and saw the driver next to him looking back. He picked up his cell phone and pretended
he was dialing a number and he was talking into the phone. “I messed up and I want my ex-wife and my son back, in that order.
Since Charity serves You and is raising my boy to do so, I know if I want them in my life, I’m going to have to serve You
too. Help me, Lord. Amen.”

As he was approaching an intersection, he saw a yellow sign with the word
ROSES
hand painted in red. He decided to stop and buy a dozen for Charity. He pulled into the lot and drove around to where the
Latino couple were selling bouquets. He was impressed with their setup. They had displays of floral arrangements wrapped in
plastic, as well as vases of flowers. There were even a few people shopping. Mainly husbands or boyfriends who must’ve forgotten
Valentine’s Day and were trying to make up, he guessed.

“Is there such a thing as purple roses?” an older white man asked Emmitt.

“I don’t know, man. That would be nice since my wife’s favorite color is purple.”

The man chuckled. “Yours too?”

They stayed side by side looking through the array of flowers. “You like these?” Emmitt initiated the conversation this time.

“They’re put together nice, if that’s what you’re asking. I have no idea of what to look for. My wife likes to have Valentine’s
week, not just Valentine’s Day.”

“Long as you don’t tell my wife.”

“How long have you been married?”

Emmitt looked away. “We’re actually divorced. But I’m in town to see if we can work things out.”

When Emmitt made eye contact with him again, the man asked him, “Do you know the Lord?”

“I don’t go to church or anything—”

“No, I asked you if you know the Lord. Do you have a relationship with Jesus Christ?”

“No, not really.”

“Well, I believe our being here at this place at the same time is a divine appointment. Have you been praying to get to know
Him?”

“Yes, I have.”

“Well, hallelujah, that confirms it because I pray daily to be put in people’s paths so I can lead them to Him.”

Right there under the canopy flower stand, the man prayed for Emmitt and his family and led him into a prayer for salvation.
Afterward, he talked to him for a few minutes more. “You may not feel different. Salvation is not based on feelings. There
may be days you don’t feel saved. Salvation is a knowing.” He handed Emmitt a tent folded card that he took from his wallet.
“This is a card from our church. It has some Bible verses you be sure to read. To get to know who Jesus is, I recommend that
you start with the book of John. Get yourself into a Spirit-filled Bible-teaching church. All of this sounds like mumbo-jumbo
right now, but just like He did today, God will lead you.”

The man paid for his and Emmitt’s flowers. Emmitt thanked the man as they walked to their cars. “Now,” Emmitt said to himself.
“I know there’s a God.” He arrived at Charity’s house a little before 7:00. There was not a nervous bone in his body when
he rang her doorbell.

Charity opened the door. “Hello,” she greeted stiffly.

“Hey. These are for you.” He pulled the roses from behind his back.

Charity’s voice was still flat. “Thank you.” She stepped away from the door so that he could come in. “Have a seat in the
living room. I’ll put these in the kitchen.”

He felt like he would burst with excitement as he walked into the living room. As far as he was concerned, he and Charity
didn’t really have to talk, he felt like what he needed to do had already been done at that flower stand. He picked up the
big Bible on the coffee table. He wouldn’t mind reading the book of John. He wanted to know what it said. He flipped through
its pages but couldn’t find John. He turned to the front of the book for the table of contents. He then sequentially ended
up near the back of the book.
In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
When Charity entered the room, he slammed the book shut.