Grace Lost (12 page)

Gus stared at her for a minute
then winked at her.  “I can break in, don’t worry.”

Gus walked to the edge of the
covered porch and skillfully scaled a post, using an uncared for flower pot as
a step.  I looked at the withered, brittle plants and dry cracked soil and
was hopeful it was another sign of abandonment of the building.  I looked
back to Gus, who was already pulling himself up onto the porch roof.  We
briefly heard his steps above us.

The three of us waited there
together, on edge and cold.  Emilie looked pale in the fading evening
light and Boggs had circles under his eyes.  It seemed like an eternity
before the front door opened.

“Welcome home,” whispered Gus.

Emilie smiled and hugged the man
as she entered.  “Are you sure it’s safe?” she whispered back at him.

“Yup.
  Come on in.”  He opened the door wide and Boggs
and I eagerly crossed the threshold.

Boggs closed the door softly
behind us, and then locked it.  The inside of the cabin was dark aside
from the fading light filtering in through windows. 

“It’s too dark out to secure
windows tonight,” said Gus, finally speaking above a whisper.  “I think we
should lay low on the top floor for tonight, stay quiet, and regroup with
securing the place in the morning.  There’s a small attic.  I think
we should hunker down in there.”

I looked around the room and
wondered about the covered furniture.  “Looks like it hasn’t been used in
awhile,” I said.  “Gus, what all’s upstairs?”

“Three
 
bedrooms
, a bathroom. 
A closet and a hallway.
 
A small attic.
  That’s about it.”

Emilie had her arms wrapped around
herself again. She walked into the kitchen and started looking through
cabinets.  “Look!” she cried out softly.  “There’s stuff left!”

We walked into the kitchen as a
group and looked though the cabinets.  There wasn’t much to choose from,
but we were grateful to have found anything.

           
We each grabbed a couple of things from the shelves then walked to the stairway
together and climbed.  It was even darker on the second floor. 

“Walk to the end of the
hall.  Just set what you grabbed off to the side and I’ll pull the ladder
down,” said Gus.  “We’ll light a candle once we’re up there.”

“You cleared the attic, right?”
asked Boggs.

“Of course,” said Gus as he pulled
on a rope hanging from the ceiling.  A ladder unfolded with several
squeaks.   “I’ll try to oil that tomorrow,” he said while rubbing his
chin with one hand.  “Ladies, go ahead and climb up.  Stay low though
‘
cause
the ceiling’s short.”

Gus handed Emilie a lighter from
his jeans pocket and she and I climbed up into the little room.

“Give us just a minute to bring
some candles up,” said Gus.

Emilie and I scooted back on our
butts until our legs were all the way up, and not long after Boggs scaled the
ladder and handed us a pillar candle.

“Thanks Boggs,” I whispered.

“No problem,” he replied. 
“Gus found a whole drawer full.  He said to go ahead and light it so he
can check from outside to see if any light is visible.”

“’Kay.”

Emilie ignited the lighter on her
third attempt, and used it to light the dusty candle.  The cramped attic
was set aglow. 

“I’m going with Gus.  You two
stay put,” said Boggs, to my dismay.

“Boggs?”
I called.

“Hmm?”

“Just…be safe.”

“We will.”

Emilie and I sat there facing each
other, both looking worried.

“Zoe, can I ask you something?”
she asked quietly.

I looked up. “Sure.”

“How old do you think Gus
is?”  She blushed slightly.  “He’s been in the Army.  Do you
think he’s
really
old?”

I figured she must be asking
because she was smitten with him.  He was a pretty good looking guy, after
all. 

“Em?
  Why do you ask?”  I teased her.  Her
cheeks reddened more.  “I think he’s older than you,” I said. 
Maybe in his thirties?”
  I shrugged again.  “You
can ask him.”

“
Noooooo,
he might get the
wrong idea!”  She looked horrified at the thought.  I stifled a
chuckle, for the moment almost forgetting my fear.  It felt good.

 “So this is where your
family spent vacations?”  I asked Emilie.

“Every summer
till I was twelve.
  After that my
folks divorced, and the good times ended.  Joey had just been born. My mom
got so depressed that I pretty much raised him myself.”  Tears filled her
eyes.  “I wish he could be here with us.”

The sadness emanating from her was
heartbreaking.  I leaned forward and hugged her.
“Me
too.”
   We jumped when Boggs and Gus returned to the ladder.

“Joey and I were camping for the
weekend,” she said, her breath catching between words.  “We were out in
the woods on a stupid camping trip.  I should have told him no…”

“Shhhh, Em, none of us knew
something this screwed up would happen.  It’s not your fault.”

The men carried the food and some
knives from the kitchen up the ladder, interrupting her recall of events
leading to her brother’s death.  Emilie and I used the candle light to
check for dates and seals as a distraction.  Before long the men also
carried up some blankets and pillows.

“Looks comfy,” said Emilie. 
She was looking tired.

“Find anything useful food-wise?”
asked Gus.

“All the dates are good except for
a can of baked beans,” I answered.  “So we have three cans of soda, a bag
of beef jerky, a jar of Nutella, a tube of Pringles, a bag of dehydrated
apricots, and two cans of peas.”

“Yum,”
joked
Boggs.

“The attic looks light-tight,”
said Gus.  “We should stay up here for the night, so before I pull the
ladder up if you need to use the facilities now’s the time.”

“I do,” moaned Emilie.

“I’ll go with you,” said
Gus. 

“Em, you want me to go
instead?”  I asked, thinking she might be more comfortable with me at her
side.

She shook her head no. 
“That’s ok.  I’ll let Gus wait outside.”

 “You two can go next,” said
Gus politely.  “We’ll hurry.”

Gus climbed down the ladder first,
followed by Emilie.

Boggs and I were left alone. 
I turned to face him and found that he was sitting closer than I
expected.  He put his hands on my shoulders and looked me in the
eyes.  “I’m sorry you got so scared today, Zo,” he whispered.  He
moved his hands lovingly to the sides of my face, placed his forehead against
mine, and breathed deeply.

“I thought you were dead, Boggs,”
I whispered.

He wrapped his arms around me and
held me until Gus and Emilie returned.

Boggs and I climbed down the
ladder, and worked our way through the dark to the bathroom at the other end of
the hall.  Boggs offered to wait outside, but I insisted he come with
me.  I wasn’t ready to be out of his sight again.  He politely turned
his back while I used the toilet, and I did the same for him. 

After we were done, we walked hand
in hand back to the ladder.  We climbed up into the room, and I saw that
Gus and Emilie had laid out the blankets and pillows in the only space that
permitted. 

“Welcome back,” said Gus. 
“If
everyone’s ready let’s pull
up the ladder and
settle in for the night.”

“Sounds good,” said Emilie just
before yawning.

Gus crouched down and pulled the
folding ladder up.  He left the rope handle dangling below.

“Shouldn’t we pull the string up?”
asked Emilie.

“No, I don’t think so,” said
Gus.  “It’d be a sign to someone that we’re up here.  Instead we’ll
hold it shut from our side.”  He set to doing just that, wedging a wooden
spoon from the kitchen between one of the rungs of the ladder and the wood
frame of the hatch.

“Let’s eat a quick snack then try
for sleep.  Zoe, you need another pill, darlin.’”  Gus reached into
his jeans pocket and fished out the small bottle of pills.

“You brought them with,” I
smiled.  “Thanks Gus!”

“Of course I brought your pills. I
don’t want to clean up anymore puke,” he said with a smile to tease me.

Boggs popped the tab on a soda and
handed it to me.  I used it to wash down my pill, and then took a piece of
beef jerky from the bag that was being passed around.  Without saying
anything, we all knew to ration our meager supplies.  If my friends were
like me, they weren’t particularly hungry and instead craved sleep.  We
all shared the can of pop, and set our goods from the kitchen and the two
firearms off to one side.  Gus thoughtfully tucked the bottle of
antibiotics back into his pocket. 

The four of us settled in on the
floor.  With not much more space than the footprint of a large closet, the
attic didn’t allow for us to spread out.  We all slept beside each
other.  The two men protectively took places sandwiching me and
Emilie.  The floor was hard, the two quilts we lay upon not offering much
in the way of comfort.  Boggs had thought to bring a king sized thermal
blanket from one of the bedrooms, which we all shared as a cover.

“Night, all,” whispered Gus as he blew
out the candle.

 I felt Emilie turn away from
me so that she was facing Gus. 

Boggs whispered to me.  “I’m
cold.”

I rolled over to face him. 
“Me too.”

We held each other for
warmth.  His fingers gently tracing circles on my arm sent me off to sleep.

I woke with a start.  My eyes
were open but everything was black.  I could hear breathing, but for a
moment had no idea where I was or who was with me. 

“Zoe,” moaned Boggs
sleepily.  “What’s wrong?”

My heart had started pounding, but
his voice brought me back to the here and now.  “Nothing,” I
whispered.  “I just woke up a little confused.”

Emilie stirred beside me. 
“You ok Zoe?”

“Ya, I’m fine.”

Gus’ lighter flickered on,
illuminating the room in a dull glow.  I had a hand over my chest and
looked around.  Nothing seemed amiss.

“Zoe?” asked Gus.  “You sure
you’re ok?”

“Ya,” I answered.  “I just
woke up and wasn’t sure where I was.”

Boggs was sitting up beside me
now.  “What time is it?” he asked no one in particular.

“Seven,” answered Gus after checking
his watch.  “We should get moving, check the place out in the light and
secure it.”  He lit the candle.

Emilie sat up and stretched. 
Her red hair was messy from sleep.  “Something stinks,” she said. 

“Probably the four of us is all,”
said Gus.  “I don’t smell death today.  Let’s hope it stays that
way.”

Boggs yawned.  “Gus, I think
we should leave the girls up here while you and I recheck things
downstairs.  Make sure nothing got in overnight.”

“I agree.  Emilie, Zoe, we’ll
just peek around and let you know when it’s safe.”  Gus reached for the
spoon holding the hatch shut, and dislodged it.  “Boggs, do you mind
readying your pistol?”

“Sure thing.”
  Boggs reached over and armed himself with the
pistol, then positioned himself in such a way as to have the best view once the
ladder was lowered.

The ladder descended with a squeal
when Gus lowered it.  Boggs kept the pistol aimed downward into the
hallway.  Nothing stirred, so he climbed down.  I saw him crouch and
he kept the gun aimed toward the stairs leading away from the second floor
while Gus descended to join him.

“Zoe,” whispered Emilie.  “I
need to use the bathroom.”

“Me too Em, but we better wait.”

She and I waited for several
minutes.  We flinched in tandem when we heard a crash from somewhere in
the cabin.

“What do you think that was?”
whispered Emilie, alarm.  She clutched at my arm.

“I’m not sure, Em.  Probably
one of the guys knocked something over.”

We listened for several seconds,
glad to not hear anything else unexpected.

“Zoe, I really need to use the
bathroom.   I’m going to climb down to pee and come right back. The
guys won’t even know.”

“Emilie.  I think it’s a bad
idea,” I said.

She was already halfway down the
ladder.  Not wanting to be alone, I climbed down after her.

We crept down the short hallway
together, treading lightly to avoid making any noise.  Daylight was
creeping in from under the curtains in the three bedrooms, and the bathroom had
a small window with privacy glass.  It helped us to see, but the rooms
were still dim.