Guarding January (21 page)

“Some people are so kinky a spanking is nice.”

Jeff chuckled, shook his head. “Come on, I want to sit down.”

“Will you talk to me if we do?”

“Talk to you about what?”

Rye rolled his eyes. “About what? About what you’re thinking.”

“I’m thinking that you always think I’m thinking!”

“You’re deflecting now.” He dried Jeff off, enjoying the simple, familiar act.

“Am not.”

“Yes, you are. I’m serious, baby. I want to know what’s going on in your head.”

“Nothing. Nothing is going on. I’m scared and tired and worried, and I don’t know what to do next.” Oh yeah, nothing was going on.

“I believe that you’re scared and tired, but that’s not nothing at all. That’s something we can talk about.”

“Okay. Okay, fine, but I need to sit down.”

“You want to go downstairs and sit in the sun?” He led Jeff out of the bathroom.

“No. I’ll sit in the bed.”

“So you can go to sleep?”

“Eventually, yeah.”

“We’re talking first.” Rye stacked the pillows against the headboard so they had somewhere comfy to sit.

Jeff wrapped up in the blankets, holding on to the edge.

Tugging Jeff into his arms, Rye held him close. “So at the risk of sounding like a broken record… talk to me.”

“What do you want to talk about? I’m tired, I’m always tired.”

“There’s got to be more going on in that head of yours than ‘I’m tired.’”

“Does there? I don’t think so. It’s all I can think about. I feel empty.”

“Then maybe we need to fill you up.”

“I don’t think we can. I mean. I don’t want to feel anything, not right now.”

“Too bad.” Jeff had been wallowing for long enough.

“What?”

“What, what? You’re fading away, and I’m not going to let you just disappear into thin air.”

“You don’t get to choose that.”

“I’m not letting you choose it.”

“Just…. Just stop. Hush. For me.”

“I can’t, baby, you’re too important to me.”

Jeff smiled, but the expression still seemed sad.

“Tell me one good thing in your life right now,” Rye suggested.

“You.”

He smiled and leaned in, taking a kiss. Okay, that was an exceptional answer. “You win this round, Jeff Smart.”

“I win all the rounds, you goofy man.”

“Yeah, let’s make sure you do.”

Jeff curled up in his lap. “Do you ever want to go away?”

“I’d love to go away with you. Our trip to Iceland was amazing.”

“We could go to the mountains….”

“Sure. Which ones?” He was easy: he wanted to be with Jeff, and he wanted Jeff to be happy.

“I don’t know. Ones where we can stay for a while. With snow. Somewhere new. Quiet.”

“I’ll start looking into it, see what I can find. How long do you want to stay?”

“Can we stay all winter?” Jeff asked tentatively. He’d been horrified at first that the tour had been cancelled, but when Donna had explained they couldn’t continue because of Roach, it seemed to have eased his burden, like it wasn’t all on his shoulders right then.

“We can stay as long as you want. We’ll find a place to rent.” If they liked it, maybe they could live there permanently, sell this monstrous place.

“Okay.” That was the first time Jeff had seemed interested in anything in days.

“Do you know how to ski?” Rye had been a couple of times and managed not to break anything. Jeff obviously couldn’t go right away, but his leg would heal.

“No. I don’t go outside.”

“You didn’t used to. You’re going to start now.”

“Maybe. I don’t like the sun.”

“You never have, or just since assuming the January role?”

Jeff shrugged and pulled the blankets around him tighter.

“Besides, when you’re skiing, there’s often no sun, and even if there is, you’re bundled up pretty much from head to toe.” He kissed Jeff’s neck. “I’m not letting you fade away. I’m not.” It was a promise.

“I just want to rest. I’m tired.”

“You can for now. Tomorrow we’ll talk about stuff some more, and you can have more to eat. One day at a time, isn’t that how it goes?” He could look into a place in the mountains to rent once Jeff was asleep, get in touch with the PT.

“Yeah. One day.” Jeff cocooned himself in, closed his eyes.

Rye pressed a kiss on Jeff’s lips. “I love you, baby.” And that was why he was going to keep pushing.

“Love you. Really.”

“I know. But I like hearing it.”

That earned him a smile. “Yeah. Yeah, me too.”

“Then I’ll have to just keep telling you.”

“Okay. I can live with that.”

“That’s what I like to hear.” Rye pulled Jeff against his body, holding on. The mountains, huh? He couldn’t wait.

R
YE
WAS
sleeping when Jeff woke up, and he found himself wandering, heading downstairs to the huge kitchen, to the room with the pool.

It was dark and quiet, and he slid into the water, letting it buoy him.

It felt good, being weightless, and without the current on, the water simply lapped gently at the edges.

He floated, eyes closed, face lax. He could just rest here forever with the water kissing his skin.

“What are you doing?” Rye sounded angry.

Jeff’s eyes popped open. “Swimming?”

“By yourself! What if you got a cramp or something?” As naked as he was, Rye climbed into the pool with him.

“You taught me how to float.” He backed away, just a little unnerved.

“I know, but I’m supposed to be with you here. Swimming alone is dangerous.” Rye took a few breaths. “God, you scared me.”

“I’m okay. I was just restless.”

“You could have woken me.”

“I’m not that big of an asshole.”

“I would rather you wake me than go swimming by yourself.”

“Are we fighting?”

“I don’t know. Are you going to fight me on this?”

“Sort of. I’m a grown up. I wasn’t being dangerous.”

“Being in the water on your own is dangerous. I can’t swim without you here too—this isn’t one-sided.”

“Oh.” Well, that was, like, logical and shit. “Okay.”

Rye chuckled. “Did you want us to have a big fight? I’m sure we can find something to argue about—”

“Shut up.” He went back to floating.

Chuckling, Rye floated next to him. “I found a great place in Colorado in the mountains. It’s available starting next month.”

“What does it look like?” He wanted the right place.

“It looks like a chalet. All wood and big windows. It has an amazing view, a fireplace, a hot tub….”

He liked the idea of a fireplace, of a place to soak.

“There’s a town nearby with all the amenities, so we can shop and ski or snowboard, stuff like that.” Rye bumped him gently in the water. “I’ll show you after we’ve eaten. There were a couple others as well, but this one was the best.”

“It’s the middle of the night. Are you hungry?”

“I could eat—you’ve got to be starving, though, because you haven’t had anything since that ice cream.”

“Not really. I think I’ve forgotten how to be hungry.”

“That wouldn’t surprise me. Gonna feed you anyway. Some soup, some crackers.”

“Your soup?” None other was right.

“Of course.”

“Okay. Okay, I could have that.”

“Maybe some of that nice artisanal cheese melted on that yummy bread.” Rye was always trying to feed him.

“I could try it, maybe.”

“That would make me happy, baby.”

Jeff floated for a few more minutes, then his stomach growled.

“Oh-ho. Someone is hungry.”

“Maybe a little, yeah.”

Smiling wide, Rye stood and held his head, mouth coming down on his. Jeff wanted this, wanted to enjoy it, experience it. “Mmm. Feels like forever since we’ve really done this.” Rye moved him to the edge of the pool, pressing against him as the kisses continued.

“Uh-huh.” He moaned, tongue slipping out to touch Rye’s, caress it.

Rye pressed even closer, body hot, even in the cool water. Jeff wrapped his legs around Rye, and his cock rubbed on Rye’s ripped belly. Rye’s cock slid along his ass, hot and big.

“I…. Do you want, do you think?” Jeff asked.

“Oh, I don’t have to think about it—I want you.”

The words drew a grin. “Yeah?”

“Yes, baby. This should be proof.” Rye rubbed against his ass.

He actually chuckled, hips rolling, rocking on Rye.

Rye deepened the kiss. “Want you.”

“Yours.” That was easy.

“Good.” Rye lifted him out of the water.

He giggled for Rye. “Where are we going?”

“Somewhere we can make love. Water and lube don’t make the best bedfellows.”

“No?” His legs dangled a little as Rye lifted him.

“Nope.”

Rye carried him to the kitchen, setting him on a tea towel on the counter.

“Rye?” He was going to make soup first?

“Yeah, baby?”

“This is the kitchen.”

“Are you saying we can’t make love in the kitchen?” Rye grabbed an apron and wrapped it around his waist.

“I haven’t ever before.”

“Then it’s about time we did, huh?” Rye chuckled, the sound husky. “You want olive oil or corn oil for lube?”

“What?” Oh, he didn’t know about that.

“Yeah, and we can use Saran Wrap for a condom.” The corners of Rye’s mouth twitched.

“Okay, you’re fired.”

“No? Glad would be better?”

Jeff started laughing, deep, hard sounds that felt weird and unnatural. Rye looked pleased as fuck, though. “Thank you, thank you very much,” Rye said in a cheesy attempt at Elvis.

He grabbed for Rye, took a kiss. “Can we have soup and then go upstairs and make love?”

“I was planning the other way around—but your idea is better.”

“I’m….” Hungry. He sort of really was. “I could have some soup.”

“Excellent.” Rye started working, putting the tomatoes on to roast, then cutting the bread thin, topping it with cheese, and putting that in the toaster oven. In two minutes he had a plate of bread with melted cheese and a glass of milk.

“You can start with that while we wait for the soup to be ready.”

“You’ll have some too, right?” He chose one, nibbling the corner of the cheese. Oh. Oh wow.

“I will.” Rye grabbed a piece up and finished it in two bites. “Damn, that cheese is nice.”

“Uh-huh.” It was almost nutty. He liked that.

Rye kept coming back and grabbing bites of the melted cheese as he put together the soup.

Jeff had eaten one and a half of them when Rye was done with the soup, putting the bowls on a tray along with their refilled glasses of milk.

“Okay, let’s go eat.”

“Smells good.” Jeff grabbed the plate with the remaining toast. They made their way upstairs and settled in the chairs by the little table instead of the bed. Rye lounged in his chair, unselfconscious about his nudity.

Jeff stood for a second, then put the plate down. “Can I sit in your lap?”

“Please.” Rye patted his thighs.

“Cool.” It was where he was warm and comfortable. The soup tasted amazing, and he drank deep, the heat filling his stomach.

Rye ate more slowly, watching him more than anything, a small smile on his lips.

Jeff relaxed back, humming over the sips.

Rye slid a hand along his skin, the touches gentle, just there.

“The soup is yummy.” He’d finished the whole thing.

“If we ever need the money, I could bottle it.” Rye put his bowl down and slid that hand up to Jeff’s head, tugging him in for a kiss.

He opened, the kiss lazy, happy, and tinged with cream.

Shifting him, Rye got him seated with Jeff’s legs straddling Rye’s solid lap, their cocks squishing up together. Jeff was warm and happy for the first time in forever, it seemed. The kisses got deeper, Rye’s cock hard against his now as everything ramped up.

His body responded, filling, feeling good. He reached between them and took them both in his hands.

“Mmm. Love your touch. So do.” Rye spoke the words softly.

Jeff nodded, their noses rubbing together, sliding together as his hand kept working.

“I don’t want to come like this,” Rye told him. “I want to come inside you.”

“Oh….” He rubbed their cheeks together.

“We do it like this, and you can ride me.”

“Good exercise for my leg.”

“Yep. Because we need the excuse.” Rye was all smiles.

He chuckled again. “Multitasking.”

“Mmm. This is the kind of multitasking I can get behind.”

“Rye, you’re not behind. Right this second, you’re the cock in front.”

Rye chuckled for him. “I’ll be in your behind in a moment.”

“I want that. I want to stretch.”

“I will stretch you, I promise.” Rye gave him a kiss. “We should get a couple plugs. Stretch you even when I’m not inside you.”

“I… I used to…. That was a long time ago.”

“Used to what, baby?” Rye rocked them together.

“Nothing. Touch me.”

“Hate it when you censor yourself with me—you can tell me anything. Anything.” Rye bit at Jeff’s lower lip, fingers playing at his hole.

“I just used to… play and fuck myself, before the speed.”

“Mmm. Now there’s a sexy thought. We could visit the sex shop when we’re out getting your piercings back.”

“I’m not sexy anymore.”

“Bullshit.” Rye met his gaze head-on. “Those people who thought January was sex on legs might not think you are, but your lover—me—I think you’re very sexy.”

Jeff’s cheeks lit on fire, and he ducked his head.

“It’s true, and I want to do so many things to you.”

“I just…. It’s an old me.”

“Being sexy is an old you?” Rye shook his head. “It’s also a part of the new you. The you who has a lover. The you who is starting a new life right here, right now.”

“Why are we talking?” Right here, right now. He liked that.

“Because the lube and condoms are over by the bed, and we’re over here.”

“Oh. Right. We have to move.”

“We do.” Rye picked him up. “We should get tested.”

“You trust me?”

“I do. Do you trust me?”

“With my soul.”

“Cool. Then we should get tested, so we can go bareback.”