Authors: Ashley Antoinette
Guilty Gucci (6 page)
“Look. I apologize. I hope you don’t have any ill will toward me,” the girl said. “I’m Chanel.”
Raegan wanted to beef out with the girl, but inside she knew that she had set herself up. She had invested her all into a man who had invested nothing. His disloyalty was inevitable. If it had not been this girl it would have been the next.
“Raegan,” she replied.
“Where can I drop you off at?” Chanel asked.
Exhausted, Raegan sighed and responded, “There’s a shelter on—”
“You’re gonna stay at a shelter with your baby?” Chanel asked judgmentally. “You don’t have any family?”
“No,” Raegan said shortly. “The shelter will be fine.”
Chanel shook her head and headed toward her own house. “A shelter isn’t fine. What you gonna do, have your baby around crackheads and dirty homeless people?” Chanel shook her head back and forth. “You can stay with me for a few nights until you make arrangements.”
Raegan wanted to protest but knew that she didn’t have many other options. “You don’t even know me.”
“I know but I feel bad just dropping you at a shelter with a newborn. I have a roommate, but we live in a four bedroom so we have plenty of extra space,” she answered. “I know you have to be exhausted. Once you rest up you can decide what your next move is. Besides I feel kind of guilty. I feel like if it wasn’t for me you would be at home with your man.”
“Highly unlikely,” Raegan said.
“Well I hope you burned his dick off ... Broke nigga don’t deserve to ever get any pussy,” Chanel uttered with a sneaky smile.
The girls broke out in laughter as Chanel headed home. As soon as Raegan stepped foot inside Chanel’s home she could tell that the girl was getting a little bit of money. “My girl Lisa stays here, but you’ll hardly ever see her. She’s a good girl ... a college student. Her head is always in the books so she won’t even know you’re here,” Chanel said as she showed Raegan to one of the spare bedrooms.
“Thanks for this,” Raegan said gratefully as she held on to her sleeping baby.
“Thanks for what?” Chanel replied as if it was nothing and to her it was no big deal. Real bitches did real shit and there was no way that she could see herself leaving Raegan and her son out in the cold. She invited Raegan to her home partly out of guilt, but mostly out of sympathy. She knew what it was like putting your trust into a no-good-ass nigga. Men had a way of selling women dreams of love and happiness. She remembered how it felt to have the rug suddenly pulled from under your feet. Her head had once been in the clouds and the long fall back down to earth had been hard one. Chanel had been burnt one too many times, so she felt Raegan’s pain.
“Get you some rest, girl. I’ll watch your baby so you can catch a few hours of sleep. You look like you’re about to pass out,” Chanel offered, her eyebrows dipping low in concern.
Raegan reluctantly handed Chanel her son. She didn’t want to give him to her, but she was so damn tired. Chanel could see the lioness in Raegan coming out over her baby cub.
“I’m not on no petty shit,” Chanel said to ease Raegan’s concerns. “I’m just trying to help. I don’t think with my heart ... I think with my pocketbook. After I pulled off I didn’t think a second thought about your man and I don’t judge you for fucking him up. I’m just glad you didn’t fuck me up.”
Raegan chuckled as she handed Chanel her son. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. What’s his name?”
“Micah ... Micah II,” Raegan replied.
Chanel brought the swaddled baby up to her face and kissed his nose. “Come on, Micah ... let’s go talk shit about your bullshit-ass daddy,” she cooed. She gave Raegan a knowing look and Raegan chuckled as she shook her head and retreated to her room. She didn’t know that she had just made a lasting friend. In fact she didn’t know Chanel from the next bitch on the street, but she appreciated her. In the short time that they had known each other Chanel had been God sent.
Chapter Three
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
“I swear to fucking God if that knocking wake this baby up I’ma slap the black off of somebody,” Chanel whispered as she looked at the sleeping infant who slept beside her. It had taken her hours to get baby Micah to go to sleep and her irritation was at an all-time high.
Lisa appeared at Chanel’s door. Her headscarf covered her short, tapered haircut, and she folded her arms in annoyance.
“You expecting somebody? It’s three o’clock in the morning,” Lisa complained. She didn’t notice the baby in the room until she walked in. Her eyebrows rose in confusion. “Whose baby?”
“A friend of mine. She is in the spare room. Can you answer the door before he wakes up?” Chanel asked. “You know I don’t let niggas know where I live so that has to be for you.”
Lisa walked out of the room, her slender, long legs leading the way. Snatching the door open, she was ready to go off, but the sight of D.C.’s finest caused her spark to fizzle out.
“Can I help you officers?” she asked, her displeasure apparent.
“We are looking for a Sunny Raegan,” one of the officers stated.
“Who?” Lisa asked.
“Ma’am, does a Chanel Rodgers live here? We need to speak with her. She was with the young woman we are looking for,” the officer informed, with an impatient tone.
“Hold on. I’ll be right back,” Lisa said defensively as she began to close the front door. One of the officers placed his foot over the threshold to stop it from closing completely.
“Can we come in, ma’am?” he asked.
“Do you have a warrant?” she shot back. She didn’t know what kind of trouble Chanel was in but she wasn’t about to just feed her girl to the wolves.
“No... .”
“Then no, you cannot come in. I’ll be right back,” she snapped as she closed the door. She sprinted upstairs and into Chanel’s room.
“Fuck is wrong with you? Why are you running?” Chanel asked.
“The police are at the door asking about you and a girl named Sunny Raegan,” Lisa informed as she shrugged her shoulders.
“The police?”
The voice came from the hallway and both girls looked up as Raegan walked into the room.
“I take it you’re Raegan,” Lisa concluded.
“Yeah,” she replied.
“Well the police are here for you,” Lisa said.
“Lisa, you have to tell them she’s not here,” Chanel said.
“No, it’s okay. I’ll see what they want,” Raegan said. Chanel gently grabbed the baby and followed Raegan down the stairs and to the front door.
She opened the door with a pounding heart and stared the officers directly in the face, while both Chanel and Lisa stood behind her.
“Are you Sunny Raegan?”
“Yeah, that’s me,” she answered unsurely.
“You are under arrest for kidnapping and assault ... Turn around please, ma’am.”
“What?” Chanel exclaimed as Raegan was put in handcuffs.
“Wait ... I didn’t kidnap anybody. He’s my son!” she shouted as they pulled her out of the house against her will. “Wait!” she protested.
“I was there ... Hold up! You guys are making a mistake!” Chanel shouted. The sound of commotion awoke baby Micah and his screams mixed in with the confusion to create chaos. Chanel handed the baby off to Lisa as she followed behind the officers as they carted Raegan away. Her bare feet froze from the snow-covered ground but she marched behind them, throwing insults and objections at their backs.
“Please ... don’t do this. I can’t go to jail. I just had a baby. He needs me. This is wrong. It’s a misunderstanding,” Raegan pleaded.
Chanel stood pissed off and shaking her head in disgust as she marched back into the house.
“What was that all about?” Lisa asked.
“Some bullshit. Her whack-ass baby daddy playing games and telling lies. Can you watch him while I go downtown to see about getting her out?” Chanel asked.
Lisa nodded her head. “Yeah, of course. Go ahead.”
Lisa stood rocking baby Micah in her arms as Chanel stormed out of the house and disappeared into the night.
Raegan sat with her face in her hands as the silence tormented her. She sat in the tiny holding cell, worried sick over her newborn son and shivering as an eerie cold set into her weak bones. She had just given birth and instead of bonding with her new child, she was fighting to keep him. Stressed beyond belief, Raegan hadn’t even had the chance to recuperate from her delivery and it felt as if she would break down at any moment.
I just want to get out of here and back to my son,
she thought as she stood timidly, gripping her abdomen as she felt blood leaking between her legs. She was a mess. Every move she made seemed to send bolts of painful shock waves through her uterus, making it feel as if she were giving birth all over again.
I just want to get out of here and back to my son,
she thought as she stood timidly, gripping her abdomen as she felt blood leaking between her legs. She was a mess. Every move she made seemed to send bolts of painful shock waves through her uterus, making it feel as if she were giving birth all over again.
She gripped the grimy metal bars and looked at the female officer who was processing her arrest paperwork.
“Excuse me, miss, can you tell me what’s going on? I just had a baby. I shouldn’t be here,” Raegan said.
The officer didn’t respond. She didn’t even look Raegan’s way. Completely ignoring her, the cop kept her eyes focused on the sheets of paper on her desk.
“Lady, please! I’m just trying to get out of here and get back to my son,” Raegan said angrily. “This is some bullshit.”
Without even looking up the cop responded, “You might as well sit down and get comfortable. You have to go before a judge to be arraigned and there are no judges available until Monday morning. You’ll be in here for the entire weekend.”
Eyes misty out of pure rage, Raegan jerked against the bars as if she wished she could break through them. “Agh! I hate him!” she screamed, as she slumped against the concrete wall and slid to the floor.
Frustration, fear, and worry consumed her, eating away at her like a moth to old clothing. Helplessness took over her and the utter failure she felt caused her to cry. She hated to be weak, but being disconnected from her child so soon after meeting him was terrorizing her. Her motherly instincts were on overdrive and she wanted to move mountains to get back to her son, but the steel and concrete held her captive. Raegan sobbed for two days. There were no clocks or windows so she had no sense of time. Forty-eight hours felt like forty-eight months. It was as if she were on death row; the anticipation was murder. She refused to eat and quickly lost all of her energy. Her body was fighting to recuperate itself and lack of sleep mixed with starvation only made things worse. The shift of officers changed every eight hours and none of them were sympathetic enough to offer her any assistance. It wasn’t until they opened the cell Monday morning to take her to court did they realize that she needed medical attention. Raegan lay deathly still on the steel bench. She was in so much pain that she couldn’t speak. She lay grimacing as she hugged herself tightly, feeling as though her insides had been ripped apart.
“Ms. Raegan, we need you to get up now,” the officer said as he pulled her to her feet, only to have her legs give out immediately.
“I ... I can’t,” she whispered. “I need my son ... I need my baby. Why are you trying to keep me away from him?” she asked, her voice barely audible.
“On your feet, Ms. Raegan,” the officer said persistently. He pulled her up again and forced her to her feet. It was then that he noticed the blood stains that covered the back of her pants. The floor felt as if it were giving out beneath her and Raegan reached out for support but found nothing but air. Raegan didn’t take two complete steps before she passed out.
Raegan awoke to Chanel and Lisa standing near her bedside.
“Hey, hon, how are you feeling?” Chanel asked.
“Where is my baby?” Raegan asked.
“He’s with his dad, sweetie,” Lisa stepped up and said. “He came with the police and I had to give them the baby. I’m so sorry.” Lisa didn’t know Raegan, but she felt extreme empathy for her situation.
“There’s an officer outside of your door, Raegan. You still have to be arraigned, but I’ve got the bail money put up and we have already contacted a lawyer,” Lisa said.
Raegan closed her eyes and laid her head back on the bed. “I can’t do this right now... .” she said.
“You don’t have to. Just lay back and rest. You lost a lot of blood, Raegan. You can’t help your kid if you are unhealthy. The doctor said that you had a setback. You were doing way too much, hon. You have to take care of yourself. Everything is going to work itself out. Just concentrate on getting better and we’ll tackle your bitch-ass baby daddy together.”
Raegan looked quizzically at Chanel and Lisa as they stood on the sides of her bed. “You two barely even know me. You’ve already done enough. I can’t ask you to—”
“Girl, bye. We’re not leaving you on stuck. It is fucked up what’s happening to you. Not to mention Chanel told me she screwed the nigga and then left empty-handed,” Lisa scoffed.
“We’ve got your back, girl ... through all of this,” Chanel reassured. “Friendships are made under the most unlikely circumstances and besides you didn’t ask, we offered.”
Raegan was astonished at the code of loyalty that these two girls held, and she felt so grateful to have them suddenly appear in her life at a time when she needed them most. She would need a few allies to go up against the bullshit that Micah was throwing her way.
Being held up in family court, arguing against a man with a wounded ego and a thirst for revenge was the worst experience of Raegan’s life. The picture that Micah’s lawyers were painting of her made her look extremely unfit and through it all Raegan feared that she would ultimately lose her son. She went through so many ups and downs that her hair began to fall out from the stress of it all. Until the conclusion of the custody battle, Raegan was able to keep baby Micah with her and she showered him with so much love. She never knew when their time would be cut short so she made the most of every day with him. Chanel and Lisa had become like her sisters. They kept their word and never turned their backs on her. They were the support system that she needed. Raegan had been on her own for so long that the feeling of belonging to a family was foreign. Chanel and Lisa would forever have her in their corner because they had picked her up and given her strength when she had lost all hope. Their faith and support never wavered. Her friends stayed by her side through the entire battle. Even the day she received the judge’s decision they were there without having to be asked.
“I’m not giving Micah full custody! Fuck that! He wasn’t even there when my baby was born. Now all of a sudden he wants to be there full time!” Raegan shouted as she ice grilled her attorney. Livid, her foot tapped against the floor and her sharp breaths could be heard across the room.
“You don’t have a choice. The judge has already ordered that your son be turned over to his father. He made you look extremely violent to the judge. You can always appeal to the family court later, once this has died down. You’re lucky that the kidnapping charges were dropped and that you only received community service for the assault. This could have gone an entirely different way,” the state-assigned attorney said with little patience. “You’re unemployed and you attacked your child’s father. You don’t have a place to live because you are no longer living with the child’s father. When your situation has improved we can revisit the idea of you regaining custody.”
Raegan dropped her head and allowed her tears to surface as her heart broke in half. “Everything’s going to be okay, Raegan. You have us,” Chanel said as she reached over and hugged Raegan. Lisa gripped Raegan’s hand in support and gave her a weak smile as she held on to baby Micah. The threesome had become extremely close. Two months had passed since the day that life had introduced them to one another. What had started out as an awkward situation had blossomed into an unlikely yet valued friendship. Chanel and Lisa had accepted Raegan and her son into their lives without hesitation. Micah had pressed full charges against Raegan out of spite and had tied her up in the legal system. The girls had taken good care of baby Micah while his parents battled it out, but the fight was over and they all had to say their good-byes to her son. Raegan had lost and it felt as if she were handing her child over to a stranger.
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