HannasHaven (2 page)

Taking a deep breath, she spoke quickly, “As I’ve told you
before, I can’t go back to my pack. I understand why you don’t want me in your
pack. If you will give me just a few more days, I’ll be out of here. Marcus can
leave now. I’m fine here by myself.” Her stomach knotted at the thought of
being alone, of Marcus leaving her.

Laney regarded her with sympathy. Hanna’s temper stirred.
She didn’t want pity.

“Hanna,” Laney said. “You understand that it isn’t that we
don’t want you, it’s just—”

“Dan tried to kill you. I understand.” The rest of the pack
wouldn’t accept her, not after what Dan had done.

“Why did you leave your pack in the first place?” Laney stared
at her inquisitively. They’d tried to pry this out of her before, but at first
she’d been too upset to talk and then they’d been too busy taking care of
Paterson to pay much attention to her. Laney’s gaze dropped to Hanna’s lap.
Realizing that she was tapping her fingers, Hanna quickly shoved her hands
under her arms in an attempt to keep her fingers still.

“Dan was my friend and packmate. When I was eighteen, I
needed a way to leave my pack and he provided it.” Dan had rescued her. All he’d
asked for was her loyalty. She couldn’t give him her love. She didn’t even know
what love felt like. But she’d been loyal to him.

Hanna took a deep breath, trying to gather her scattered
thoughts together.

“Hanna, we’re very grateful for everything you have done.”
Cooper leaned forward. “Without the drawing you did of one of your kidnappers,
we’d never have been able to figure out that Leonard was behind the attacks on
Laney.”

She’d always been good at drawing. She’d managed to catch a
glimpse of one of them when they thought she was unconscious. Marcus had
instantly recognized that man she’d drawn as one of Paterson’s enforcers.

“I don’t know why you feel so grateful. It was the least I
could do. I mean, for god’s sake, Dan tried to kill Laney. Not that Dan would ever
have done that if Leonard and his goons weren’t holding me as collateral. But
still, I’m not sure why you’re helping me.”

Cooper sighed, but it was Rye who spoke. “Because when we
caught Dan trying to blow up Cooper and Laney’s place, we promised him we would
take care of you. He died on our watch when Samantha betrayed us and killed
him.”

“But you’d have killed him anyway, right?”

They remained silent, but she knew it was true. Death was
the only punishment for attempted murder.

“Dan didn’t want to hurt you.” She willed Laney to believe
her. “I know he didn’t. But he loved me.” She took a deep breath to try to
still the shaft of pain and shame that burst through her. “He was simply trying
to protect me.”

“I know,” Laney said softly. “I don’t blame you, Hanna. None
of this was your fault. Leonard is the one who hated me, who tried to kill me.
This is his fault, not yours.”

Then why did she feel so guilty?

Maybe because I never loved Dan, and he loved me so much
he gave up his life for mine.

“When Leonard’s enforcers kidnapped me, I was furious with Dan.
I blamed him, even though it was his father who started it all by getting into
debt to Paterson. Each time Dan failed, they’d bring him back to where they
were keeping me. They’d beat him, beat me, threaten to kill me unless he
succeeded. And still, I blamed him.”

What kind of bitch am I?

Marcus took hold of her hand, clasping it in his much larger
one. “Dan was a grown man. He could have come to us, we would have helped him.
When we finally did capture him, his biggest concern was for you. He wanted us
to take care of you.”

The shaft of guilt drove in deeper.

“Which is why I can’t just let you leave, Hanna,” Cooper
told her. “Not without making sure you’ll be cared for. But I need all of my
enforcers to help me control what could turn into a volatile situation. The
Silverton pack is unsettled. Leonard was a dictator, he made all the decisions
and his enforcers followed him religiously. Now that they’re gone, it’s left a
power vacuum and the pack in a state of turmoil. I need people I can trust. I
need Marcus.”

She chewed at her lip. “I understand. I do. I’m sorry for
creating such problems.”

Rye stared at her. “So why don’t you tell us why you can’t go
back to your pack?”

Hanna avoided looking directly in his eyes. “I never liked
it there.”

Understatement of the year.

“Do you have any other family that could take you in? Did
Dan?” Laney asked.

Hanna shook her head. “My mom and I lived with my
grandfather, who was part of the Curtail pack. She died when I was four and my
grandpa died six years later. Then I went to live with my father. I might have
a cousin or two still living with the Curtail pack, but I don’t know them. Dan
had no other family.”

Hanna wiped her hands over her jeans legs. “Dan, Terrence
and Lucas were sick of living with our old pack. They’d decided to leave and
Dan offered to take me with them. The four of us managed to form our own small
pack. I’ll be fine, you know. I can take care of myself,” she insisted. Not a
one of them looked convinced.

They could have at least pretended
.
A little bit,
anyway.

“I’m surprised your father let you leave,” Rye commented.

“He didn’t know.” She’d have found herself locked in her
room at any hint she was thinking of taking off. Luckily, her father never paid
her much attention.

Hanna glanced at the security panel, ensuring the red light
was flashing. Good, Marcus hadn’t forgotten to set the alarm.

“Did your father abuse you?” Rye asked bluntly.

“Enough, Rye,” Marcus replied. “She doesn’t have to talk
about it if she doesn’t want to.”

“He’s not a nice man.” Hanna fisted her hands. “I hated it
there.”

“So you escaped with Dan,” Cooper said. “Then what?”

“We moved from town to town, the men winning whatever money
they could.” Sometimes they’d be flush. Other times, Dan would come back to
whatever flea-ridden motel they were staying in and shake her awake, saying
they had to go. Quickly. She’d learned not to bother unpacking, that she had to
be ready to leave at any time.

“What money they could win from poker.” Rye’s words dripped
with disapproval.

“Yes,” she admitted, raising her chin. She wouldn’t let this
man make her feel as though she were worthless.

“You any good?” Marcus asked.

Hanna’s eyes widened.

“What?”

“At poker.”

A slow smile spread over her face. She could really fall for
him. “Yeah,” she drawled, not thinking about that thought too carefully. “I’m
good.”

“We’ll see,” he promised. She breathed easier, the heavy
weight that had developed on her chest easing with his acceptance.

“Sorry to interrupt your social life,” Rye said
sarcastically. “But can we get back to the real reason we’re here?” Rye turned
toward her. “So, did you ever help Dan fleece people?”

Marcus growled as Hanna winced.

“Rye,” Laney hissed.

Irritation raced through her. What did they think? One harsh
word and she’d shatter?

“I didn’t realize they were doing that. I was naïve enough
to believe they only played legit games.”

Rye looked at her with disbelief and she didn’t blame him.
But it was the truth. Honestly, she’d just been trying to live day to day.
Moving around constantly had been unsettling. The idea her father’s pack might
be tracking them had been stressful.

Then there had been her relationship with Dan. Her guilt.

Rye ran his hand over his face. She’d learned that things
were very black and white with Rye. She had a feeling she fell on the negative
end of that spectrum.

“We’ll have to find another pack for you,” Cooper said. “We
can’t send you back to your pack if you hated it there.” He looked at her hard
and she gulped, realizing her half answers hadn’t worked. He knew she was
holding something back. But she wasn’t ready to tell them the full truth. That
her pack had been about to force her to mate with an abusive psycho. “It will
take time to find a pack to match you with though. And at the moment, time is
one thing I’m short on.”

“I’ll be fine. I just need a few days to think this
through.” God, she was tired. A headache pounded at her temples. She needed to
get more sleep. She’d known her time with Marcus couldn’t last. Nothing good in
her life ever did. But she’d chosen not to think about it, to push it out of
her mind. Stupid.

“We done yet?” Marcus tone suggested he was bored. But
temper flared in his eyes. She wondered why he was angry.

Cooper pinched the bridge of his nose. “The two of you have
already been here longer than I had planned. Your wolves need to be around
others. I’ll think of something. We don’t have to make up our minds today.”

Rye opened his mouth but Cooper sent him a sharp look.
Obviously Rye thought it was important enough to worry about now.

Hanna knew she’d be thinking of little else. What the hell
was she going to do?

That question still plagued her later that night. Sighing,
she turned to stare at her alarm clock.

2:48 a.m.

No sleep for me tonight.

Hanna rose and fished a sweater out of her drawers. Slipping
it over her pajamas, she crept her way down the hall to the bathroom.

Crouching, she grabbed some cleaning supplies from the
cupboard. They were nearly empty, she’d have to ask Marcus to get some more.

But then what did it matter? She’d soon be moving on.

She grabbed a brush, squatted in the shower and scrubbed.

What will I do?

Her wolf had suffered from touch deprivations for years. Her
father’s pack had seen her as weak, her submissiveness a liability.
Pathetic.
Useless.
The words she’d heard all too often growing up beat against her
self-confidence and she scoured the shower floor harder, as though she could
erase them from her mind.

But her Alpha had found a way she could be of use to him. By
making her a pawn and forcing her to mate with Reginald, an enforcer from the
neighboring pack. He’d wanted to bring the two packs closer. Only no one wanted
to sacrifice their daughter to Reginald—no one except her father. Reginald was
a sick bastard whose touch made her stomach turn. She’d turned to her father to
protect her.

He hadn’t even been able to meet her eyes. He’d also made no
move to defend her. He’d cared more about his next bottle of whiskey than her.

Hanna hadn’t known what to do, where to go. Until Dan had
offered to help her.

Life had been better with Dan. She’d had enough to eat, a
roof over her head, she hadn’t been forced to run around after others. But she’d
still been lonely. Dan, Terrence and Lucas had spent long hours out gambling,
leaving her alone. Her wolf longed for a pack.

How will I survive on my own?

Werewolves couldn’t be apart from others of their kind for
long without going feral. Hanna stood and cleaned the shower walls before
rinsing them off and wiping them down with a rag.

Where can I go?

Biting her lip, she continued to clean. Whatever she did,
she had to keep away from her father’s pack. A year had passed now since she’d
left with Dan. They wouldn’t be looking for her if they had ever bothered to in
the first place.

Could she go to her cousins? Would they remember her?
Probably not.

She moved away from the shower to clean the bathroom floor.

It wasn’t fair to burden Marcus with her problems—he had
issues of his own. Besides, it was time for her to start standing on her own
two feet and taking care of herself.

“You missed a spot.”

Startled, Hanna sprang back on her knees and gaped up at
Marcus. “You scared me!” Damn, he moved quietly.

“You were too busy muttering to hear me.” His voice held no
accusation but she flushed nevertheless. Normally she heard everything, was
hypersensitive to every noise and movement around her. She’d learned to be.

Yet he’d managed to sneak up on her a few times. She stared
up at him, gulping heavily as she encountered his chest. His bare, muscular,
tanned chest. He’d pulled on a pair of jeans but left the top two buttons
undone.

“You missed a spot,” he repeated.

“I did not!” She scrutinized the floor.

“Did so,” he replied lazily. He leaned against the doorway and
pointed to the far corner. “Right there.”

Leaning over, she stared at the spot.

“That’s an indent in the floor.”

Marcus raised an eyebrow. “Guess you’re finished then. Or
are you planning on vacuuming the living room next?”

She flushed. “Sorry if I woke you. I wasn’t always like
this, you know. This obsession I have with cleaning and security gets worse
when I’m upset.”

He stared at her for a long moment. “You finished?”

Hanna nodded. She wouldn’t sleep. But the least she could do
was lie quietly in her bed so he could.

Without warning, Marcus grabbed her. Pulling her up, he
scooped her into his arms and carried her down the hallway.

“Marcus, what are you doing?” Her wolf delighted in his show
of strength.

She wished she dared cuddle close and rest her head against
his chest. Wished she had that right. But he wasn’t hers and he never would be.
She didn’t deserve him.

Useless. Weak.

Striding into her bedroom, Marcus placed her on her feet and
pulled back the covers of her bed.

“Hop in.”

Hanna climbed onto the mattress. Marcus surprised her by pulling
the blanket up and tucking her in.

“I was going to come back to bed. You didn’t need to carry
me.”

He shrugged and grinned. The smile transformed his face,
making him look years younger and less churlish.

“Maybe I wanted to.” He grabbed the chair in the corner of
the room and carried it closer to her bed.

Hanna rolled over to better see him slouch down into the
chair and prop his feet on the foot of her bed.

He closed his eyes.

Hanna watched him, unsure what the hell was going on. “Umm,
Marcus?”

He grunted.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

He opened one dark-brown eye, glaring at her. “I’m trying to
sleep.”

“Here?”

“You can’t sleep, you’re worrying about things. I’m keeping
you company so you won’t worry. Go. To. Sleep.”

Sleep? With him in touching distance? In her bedroom?

Was he delusional?

“Close your eyes. Breathe in. Out. In. Out. In. Out.”

Hanna fell asleep with the sound of his voice still running
through her head.

* * * * *

Marcus put down his phone and looked over at Hanna who was
dusting the bookcase. Again. She’d been cleaning nonstop for the last two days.

“That was Cooper. He and Rye are coming tomorrow.”

Her shoulders tightened. He could feel her stress levels
rise, but she didn’t stop cleaning.

“Okay.”

“Hanna.” He said nothing else, just waited. His wolf studied
her, feeling her fear and anxiety.

Hanna turned, a pinch of temper on her face. The tense knot
in his stomach eased. Her temper he could deal with, but her fear made him want
to do something stupid. Like hug her and tell her that everything would be
okay.

He couldn’t promise her that.

Little wonder she was scared. She had no pack, no mate, no
security. The fact that she could force herself past the terror, could face him
with fight in her eyes ignited his admiration.

“What?” she snapped, hands falling onto her hips. “What is
so funny?”

Marcus realized he was smiling and immediately blanked all
expression from his face.

“Sit. I want to talk you.” He gestured to the chair beside
him.

“Not a dog, remember?” she snarled.

Brave little wolf.

His wolf answered her small challenge with a growl. He might
admire her guts, but she needed to know who was in charge.

“Don’t try to intimidate me. We both know you’re not going
to bite.”

Ooh, some claws. He took her attitude as a sign she trusted
him and his wolf basked in the knowledge. Still, just because she felt more
comfortable with him didn’t mean she could disobey him. She continued to
persist in thinking that he had a nice side.

He didn’t.

“There you go again, deluding yourself into thinking I won’t
bite.” His voice was thick with dark promise.

Her jaw dropped.

Marcus crooked his finger. “Come here, Hanna.”

She shook her head and took a step back.

“Hanna. Here. Now.”

“No way.”

He simply stared at her. She tried valiantly to hold his
stare but couldn’t handle more than a few seconds before her gaze dropped and
she moved toward him.

Marcus didn’t let his satisfaction show. As she drew close,
he scooped her up, setting her down on his lap. He ignored the warning voice
inside his head that told him this was a damn stupid idea.

“Marcus!” She shoved at his hands ineffectively. Damn it, he
didn’t like how weak she felt. How fragile.

He let his wolf brush against hers playfully.

“Oh.”

Over the past few weeks he’d rarely sensed her wolf. She
hadn’t joined him on any of his runs. Wolves were pack animals, they were
tactile. Sure, some were more reserved or solitary. But they still needed other
pack members to keep them grounded, sane. They needed some interaction with
other wolves. But Hanna’s wolf felt starved, weak.

Marcus sat back and held her, his wolf rubbing against hers
contentedly.

“Hanna.”

“What?” She looked up at him and it was too much. He leaned
down and kissed her sinful lips. They were plump and lush, the bottom lip a tad
larger than the top. He brushed his mouth against hers. Once, twice, listening
closely as her breath grew faster.

The he took her bottom lip between his teeth and bit down
firmly, careful not to break the skin.

“Ow, she complained. “What was that for?” Her eyes were
dazed with lust.
Interesting.

“Behave yourself.”

Her brows drew together. “Behave? What part of ‘I am not a
dog’ don’t you understand?”

“Oh believe me, honey, I know you’re not a dog. However, you
are going to talk to me. I know you’re scared, but snapping at me isn’t going
to help matters.”

Hanna glared at him but couldn’t hold his gaze for long.
“Sorry,” she muttered.

He ran his hand up and down her arm, content to just hold
her. “Tell me something, did you love Dan?”

“I cared for him,” she replied, her body language screaming
back
off
.

“Not the same thing. You didn’t love him. I’ve seen
werewolves who have lost their mates, they were devastated. One nearly starved
himself to death. Another went feral. I’m sure you were grateful to him. From what
little you’ve said, it sounds like life with your pack was pretty horrible, and
Dan provided you with a way to gain your freedom. But why did you mate him if
you didn’t love him? Did he force you?” His hand grasped her arm tightly,
waiting for her reply.

“He didn’t force me,” she told him, pulling her arm free.
“Does this really matter?”

He hadn’t asked her until now because he hadn’t wanted to
push her too far, too fast. Now, though, her answers had become much more
important. He wanted to know. He had to know.

Marcus raised his eyebrows, giving her a firm look. She
wrinkled her nose at him and he had to bite his cheek to stop from smiling.

She stared at her hands as she spoke. “I didn’t mate Dan. We
were never mates.”

Marcus gaped at her in shock. “What? But you said…” He
trailed off, thinking back. Had she ever told him that Dan was her mate?

“No, I didn’t. You all thought he was and I just never
disagreed.”

“We thought the two of you were mated because that’s what he
told us. I’m very good at detecting lies.”

She stared right into his eyes, her face pale but her voice
was steady. “Dan was a gambler. His success relied on his ability to bluff and
lie. Besides, I think he almost believed that I was his mate. He wanted me to
be his mate. But I just couldn’t. I know I should have told you, but I was
scared that none of you would help me if you knew the truth. You promised Dan
you’d look after his mate. That’s not me.”

“Christ.” He blew out a breath. “Hanna, of course we’ll help
you. No matter who you are.”

Misery filled her eyes. “He was my friend. He helped me when
no one else would and I couldn’t give him the one thing he wanted.”

Marcus held her tight, wanting to soothe her. At the same
time relief surged through him. She hadn’t loved him. She hadn’t mated him.

“I owed him so much, but every time he touched me…” She
trailed off, but he filled in the pieces. She hadn’t been attracted to him in
the slightest.

“I think, like me, he was lonely. His family wasn’t well liked
because of their gambling. But because they sometimes brought in money to the
pack accounts they were higher in the hierarchy than my father, who only ever
wasted money on booze.”

Marcus pondered over everything she’d said. He had so many
unanswered questions, yet felt as though he were stuck in a maze. The wrong
question and he’d find a dead end.

“Why was your family so low in the pack?”

She looked away, embarrassed. “My father was an alcoholic.”

Marcus was astonished. Werewolves didn’t suffer from
alcoholism. Their high metabolism made it hard for them to even get drunk.

“He always had a bottle in his hand. I think over the years
his wolf died bit by bit. I hardly ever saw him change. The pack thought him
worthless. And he was. I have no friends, no family. The closest pack to us
would have sent me straight back and I had no way of figuring out where another
pack was or how to get there. If I’d set out on foot, they’d have tracked me.”

The fear in her voice clawed at him, stirring his possessive
instincts.

If he ever let himself get too close to her, he’d be the
most overprotective bastard there ever was. Hanna was young; she’d barely
lived. She deserved more than a crusty, set-in-his-ways wolf who’d want to
smother her. No, he wasn’t right for her. No matter how much his wolf demanded
he take her for his own.

“And what would they have done once they found you?” he
asked.

Hanna shot him a troubled glance and he immediately tamped
his rising anger. His fury would hinder his search for answers.

She shrugged. “Lock me up, I guess.”

“Did they ever hit you, hurt you?” Anyone who abused someone
weaker or smaller than themselves was scum as far as Marcus was concerned. When
his mother died, he and his brothers were sent by his stepfather Zachary to
live with his aunt. But his sister had been made to stay with Zachary. She was
his biological child and he had been Alpha at the time.

No one had known the extent of the abuse he’d dished out to
her. Marcus hated that she’d been hurt by that bastard. When they had found
out, he and his brothers had helped her escape. But still, the thought of the
pain and suffering she’d endured at Zachary’s hands made him feel ill.