He Loves Lucy (10 page)

Jenna gasped. “That is
so
unfair.”

“No, what is unfair, Jenna, is that my brother’s entire life was altered because of one tiny error in cell division. What’s unfair is that my parents died in the prime of their lives because of a freak accident in a brand-new boat. Those things are unfair. What happened with us was your premeditated decision.”

“We’d grown apart and you know it.”

“Nope.” Theo shook his head. “You grew away from me. I’ve always been just who I am.”

Jenna put a hand on one hip and narrowed her eyes at him. “Bitterness doesn’t look good on you. It almost makes you look ugly.”

He let go with a raucous laugh. “There you go! Yet another reason to marry your attending physician-not only does he have more prestige and money than me, but he’s better-looking, to boot!”

With a forced bedside-manner smile, Jenna told Theo to take care. Then she turned, walked back to her car, and drove away.

Buddy opened the front door a few moments later.

“Who are you arguing with out here?” He scanned the street in front of their house.

“Norton. You know how he is.”

“Yeah.” Buddy laughed. “Need some help raking?”

Theo looked at the mess under the live oak and had a better idea. “Whad’ya say we get medieval on the kickboxing dummies at the gym instead? I could use a good fight right about now.”

Buddy peered around the yard until he located the cat, then frowned at Theo. “I don’t even want to know what Norton said to you.”

Journal Entry April 16

Breakfast: 3/4
c oatmeal; 1 Granny Smith apple; 1 c skim milk; decaf

Lunch: 3
oz chicken breast; 1 cup stir-fried veggies; ‘At
c
brown rice

Snack:
1 c plain yogurt; 1/2 banana; sprinkle of low-fat granola

Dinner: 3
oz sirloin; 1 small baked potato; 1 tbsp light whipped butter; 1 c sauteed spinach

Affirmation for Today:

Just
because Theo wants me to meet him at a running

Lucy arrived at the Miami Springs High School parking lot shortly before five, peering in the dark until she could locate the open chain-link gate Theo had described. She grabbed her gym bag, locked her car door, and trudged down the walkway to the track.

She could make out the white lines that glowed under her feet, but not much else. She looked up to see the shadowy outline of Theo’s form, standing next to what appeared to be a large ball.

It was so quiet she could hear her footfalls on the spongy surface as she walked.

“Good morning, Luce.” As soon as Theo spoke, she detected a slight change in his voice. It was like some of the zest was gone from it, and she suddenly wished she could see his face, just to make sure he was all right.

“Come here often?” she asked, setting her bag down in the dewy grass.

Theo laughed and patted her on the shoulder. “I do, as a matter of fact. Maybe it’ll become a hangout for us. Did it take you long to get here?”

Theo wanted to hang out with her? That was news. “Uh, it’s about the same as my place to Miami Beach. Not a problem at all.”

“Good.” Theo shuffled his feet, shoved his hands in his pockets, and looked off into the dark morning.

There was something wrong with him. She could sense it. And she was just about to ask him what it was when he said, “I want to tell you something, Lucy.”

She straightened at how serious he sounded, and all her senses went on alert. The darkness made the few feet between them shrink to nothing. She heard Theo’s even breathing and could smell the soap and shampoo on him and the now-familiar scent of his skin.

Suddenly he moved toward her and his face was so close she could feel his heat. Then his lips brushed over her cheek, soft and sweet. They stayed there about three seconds, but it felt like forever.

“I am extremely proud of you.”

Lucy felt his breath on her neck just before he pulled away. She squeezed her eyes tight and tried to breathe normally, wondering if that kiss had branded her cheek with a sizzling imprint of his lips. “Thanks, Theo,” she managed.

“And you looked wonderful at the studio last week.”

He flashed his teeth at her in the dark. “Everybody was talking about you.”

Lucy thought her heart would melt. He just said she looked
wonderful
! She was thrilled!

“Now it’s time to kick your ass, Cunningham.”

Lucy laughed. She loved the way Theo talked dirty to her.

He took her by the hand, slipping his fingers between hers, and they walked along the track at a nice clip. He squeezed her hand and smiled again before he let go.

As they walked, Theo explained they were entering a new phase of her training, one that would put more emphasis on the quality of her cardio, not just the quantity. He explained interval training to her, that it would consist of alternating running and walking at varying speeds, including sprints. Lucy figured now would be the time to mention that she didn’t do sprints.

“Ever hear the blues song that goes, ‘I’m built for comfort, not for speed’?” Lucy asked. “That’s my theme song.”

The sun had begun to tiptoe its way over the horizon, and she could just make out the amused look on Theo’s face.

“That’s bull, Luce. You ran just fine that day at the News Cafe”. You ran right out onto the sidewalk.“

She laughed. “OK, but I was running away from you and your
tank
. It was a self-preservation thing.”

Theo laughed, too, and Lucy realized that she’d developed a real fondness for the sound of that laugh. She’d grown accustomed to its cadence over the last few months, along with all the other little noises Theo made, like the sigh when she exasperated him, the little devilish chortle when he added five pounds to the standing tricep pull-down, the way he gave her his seal of approval-“
you rock, Cunningham”
-after she’d made it through something difficult.

“I’m not too proud to chase after women,” Theo said, then lunged toward her with a dramatic roar.

Lucy yelped, turned, and took off down the track.

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt her body surrender to the rhythm of running. She listened to her breath move in and out and the steady tap of her feet on the track. She knew she wasn’t going all that fast, but it didn’t matter. What mattered was that her body instinctively remembered how to do this, that her body could still do what it was designed to do.

“I’m right behind you, Lucy.” Theo’s voice dripped with pretend menace.

Lucy smiled, reveling in how her lungs were expanding, thinking that the response she’d had to Theo’s peck on her cheek was proof her body remembered other joys as well. Maybe sensual pleasure was something a woman’s body could never forget, no matter how hard the woman tried to pretend it wasn’t important.

Maybe being in close proximity to Theo Redmond, day after day, was all the reminder a body needed.

As her lungs pumped and her head cleared, she wondered if all the effort she’d put into blotting out the pain had deadened her ability to feel pleasure, too. What a shame. What a loss.

And then she asked herself: how much had she really allowed Brad Zirkle and the Pitt State football team to steal from her that day?

Lucy’s eyes began to sting.

“You’d better keep going, little girl.” Theo was trying for a downright creepy delivery, but to Lucy he sounded like a cross between Mr. Rogers and Arnold Schwarzenegger. He leaned in close to hiss in her ear, “You’re in the woods. It’s dark. The big bad wolf’s right behind you, and you look good enough to eat.”

The stands had been packed that day her freshman year. If the team managed to beat Purdue they got their shot at the Taco Bowl. And, thanks to Brad Zirkle’s record-breaking rushing performance, they did it. Lucy cheered as the students stormed the field in celebration. It was all chaos and excitement. And then Lucy watched team members unfurl something… a bedsheet?… and the first words appeared:
Thank You, Lucky Lucy Cunningham
…

Lucy stumbled on the track, and she felt Theo’s hand steady her. She pushed herself to keep running. She needed to run through the memory, push her body through the hurt.

She’d felt joy when she first saw those words, because for a second she really thought Brad was thanking her. He’d just had the game of his college career, the game that made up for his season-long slump. She’d been dating him for three weeks. They’d slept together. The big sign unfurling on the field had to be his way of thanking her for his change in luck, for all the world to see.

And then the rest of the sheet snapped open. The team went wild with hoots, the TV cameras swarmed, and everyone within earshot began to mumble, “Who’s Lucy Cunningham? And what’s a
slump buster
?”

On some level, Lucy knew it was bad. Real bad. But it wasn’t until she was leaving the stadium nearly fifteen minutes later that she learned precisely what she was.

Two frat boys were trying to explain the concept to a girl Lucy recognized from Brit lit class. She overheard them say, “If a jock is in a slump, his teammates dare him to find a fat or ugly girl and have sex with her. If the act is witnessed and he can survive it, his luck will change.”

For an instant, Lucy had been unable to move and got jostled around in the exiting crowd. But then she ran-she ran as fast as she could in a blind panic of shame, falling in the parking lot, scraping her palms bloody. Someone tried to help her up, but she pushed them away and scrambled to her feet, running all the way back to her dorm.

The Miami Springs High School track blurred under Lucy’s feet, and her lungs began to burn like they had that day so long ago. Her heart pounded so hard it hurt, just like it had that day. Her legs felt like Jell-O, just like that run from the stadium ten years ago.

She heard herself make the strangest sound, and it struck her as interesting that she could sob and run at the same time.

“Lucy!”

She stopped in the middle of the track. She stood, panting, her legs braced wide apart, her hands on her knees and her head hanging as she gulped down the air. Theo bent down to peer into her face.

“Are you all right?”

The instant Theo’s hand caressed her back, her scream pierced the silence. Lucy spun around, unable to stop the screech of words already leaving her lips: “
Don’t touch me.‘”

The sun had risen enough that she could clearly see the bewilderment in Theo’s face. His mouth hung open and he stepped back, shocked.

Their eyes locked for a long moment.

“What in the world is going on, Lucy?”

Theo hadn’t felt the anger pulse off Lucy’s body like this since that day at the News Cafe. And not only was the anger back; it was back with a vengeance, and it was raw and nasty and, for some reason, aimed directly at him.

Lucy pushed out her chin in an attempt to stop its quivering. “Don’t ever touch me again without my permission. Got it?”

Where did this come from
? He’d only been playing with her, and he wondered if somehow their little Robin Hood game had flipped a switch in Lucy’s brain. He’d never seen her so pissed. He’d never seen
any
woman this pissed.

Or this hurt.

He made his voice as gentle as he could. “I touch you all the time, Luce. I just wanted-”

“I know you touch me! Do you think I haven’t
noticed
?”

Theo took another step back and felt torn between appreciation for Lucy’s warrior princess body stance and the devastation in her eyes. Something-someone-had really hurt Lucy Cunningham. It had been obvious to him from the beginning. And there she stood before him now, a ticking time bomb in a pair of pink sweatpants, and he didn’t know how to defuse her.

“You’ve got to talk to me, Luce.”

“Just don’t touch me anymore, Theo.”

She turned away and began to cut across the oval infield of grass, arms swinging high as she took big strides toward her gym bag.

Theo arrived at her side-a polite distance away- and said nothing. After they walked for a few moments, he risked a sidelong glance, only to find her face contorted and streaked with tears.

“What in the hell is this about? Tell me!”

She shook her head and held up a hand. “I’m sorry. That was completely ridiculous.”

He sighed. “Look. We all have our hot buttons, and it seems I just hit one of yours. So tell me what’s going on.”

There was no humor in Lucy’s eyes or curve to her lips, which now formed a grimace. She turned away without comment.

He decided not to push. Like everything else about Lucy, he would have to discover it one little piece at a time.

“How about we just move on to the exercise ball?” Theo tried to sound cheerful. “You’re warmed up, and I’ve got a few new tricks up my sleeve I’d like to show you.”

She came to a halt, then stomped her feet in the grass in indignation. “You want to keep going after I’ve had a complete mental breakdown?” She waved her arms in the air. “All I want to do is go home and eat a large pepperoni with extra cheese and a box of Fiddle

Faddle! I don’t want to do any stupid tricks on your fucking big red exercise ball!“

“Lucy-” Theo somehow kept himself from brushing away the strand of hair swaying across her forehead. Then he restrained himself from taking her in his arms, holding her, and telling her everything would be all right. This woman baffled him. She made him laugh. She stirred up feelings in him that he had no business having. He didn’t know how to handle this. He didn’t know how to handle her.

So he said, “Junk food isn’t the way you deal with bad days anymore, remember?”