Healing a Cowboy's Heart (Cowboy Dreamin' 2) (17 page)

Ben
pushed the movie into the disc player as he flipped on the remote for the
television.
Damn, the kid was smart
enough to know how to put his own movies on?
Apparently.
He plopped down on the soft right in the middle.

The
moment he gave her those puppy dog eyes, she couldn’t resist. Each of them took
a spot on the couch, one on either side of the little boy.

She’d
seen the movie before, but low and behold within thirty minutes Ben was asleep
leaning against her side. “He’s asleep.”

“I
told you he’d be out inside of a half an hour.” Jeff stood and pick up Ben in
his arms. “I’ll be right back.”

Trepidation
twisted her guts. They’d talk now and she wasn’t sure she was ready for
the talk.
Maybe she could convince him
to have sex first. She unbuttoned her blouse. A glimpse of skin should do it.
Jeff was a sexual man. She didn’t know how he went as long as he did without
sex. The moment they’d been together, the whole room threatened to combust.

“Terri?”

“Yeah?”
she called back.

“Can
you come in a kiss Ben goodnight? He won’t go back to sleep until you do.”

“Sure.
Be right there.”
Damn it.
She
rebuttoned her blouse, but left it untucked from her jeans. When she walked
into the room, the small beside lamp next to the bed was on. Ben had crawled
beneath the sheet. “Hey, buddy.”

“Can
I have a hug and a kiss goodnight?” He raised his arms for her.

“Sure,
Ben.”
She leaned over and his little arms wrapped around
her neck.
“Night.”
She kissed him on the forehead,
holding back tears his trust and unconditional love toward her brought.
Leave it to a little boy to bring out the
feelings the dad is fostering.
“Sleep well.”

“Will
you be here tomorrow
mornin
’?”

“I
don’t know, Ben. I might be back at my cabin near the main lodge, but I’ll see
you at breakfast if nothing else.”

“Okay.
I love you, Ms. Terri.”

“I
love you too, buddy.”

Ben
rolled over as she wiped her eyes and stood. He needed the love of a mother so
much, it hurt her heart.

Jeff
took her hand and let her back out to the couch. They sat down side by side.
“Thank you for being there for Ben, but I wish you hadn’t lied to him.”

“I
didn’t lie to him.”

“You
said you loved him when I know you don’t.”

She
spun to face him. “How do you know what’s in my heart? I do love that little
boy. He’s a treasure and I wish I was going to be around to see him grow into a
man someday. If he’s treated right by the women in his life, he’ll grow into a
special person.”

“All
right, I don’t know how you feel about him, but I don’t want him led on either.
You know you aren’t a permanent part of his life.”

“I
know that too, Jeff, but I can’t help but love him. He’s a special little boy.”

Jeff
ran his hands over his eyes in a weary motion, shoving his hat from his head to
let it drop on the arm of the couch. She didn’t know how to help him.

Comforting
him seemed natural to her. She brought him down so his head lay on her lap.
“You’ve done a great job with him,” she said, running her fingers through his
hair. “He’s a great kid.”

“Thanks.
I wish his mother loved him as much as I do or you.” He glanced up as she
pushed his hair off his forehead. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Sure
you do.”

“No,
I don’t. You’ve been everything a man could want in a woman.”

“But?”

“I
can’t give you my heart like you deserve. I have nothing left to give.”

“It
doesn’t matter, Jeff. We’ll go with what we have. Great sex, a kind of
friendship or at least that’s what I hope we have.”

“Yeah.”

He
grabbed the back of her head and pulled her down to meet his lips. The kiss
took her breath away. Everything about the sexy man had her body standing at
attention and her panties wet.

“I
want you,” he whispered against her lips.

“Good.
I want you too.”

He
sat up and spun around. Quick as lightning, he had her on her back as he
hovered over her.

“Here?”

“Why
not?”

“What
about Ben?”

“He
won’t wake up.”

“I’d
rather not be caught with my pants down around my ankles by your three-year-old
son.”

He
kissed her, leaving her panting for more. “Let’s go into the bedroom. I wanna
fuck you hard.”

“Oh
yeah.”

He
helped her to her feet, and then lifted her into his arms to carry her down the
hall to his bedroom. “You’re going to hurt your back, doing this.”

“Please.
I wrestle cattle, throw hay bales and lifted fifty pound feed sacks two at a
time all day long. I can lift one little hundred and twenty pound woman like
you.”

“God,
I wish I weighed a hundred and twenty pounds.”

He
laughed. “I’m not gonna ask how much you really weigh then.”

“A
hundred and fifty.”

“Wow.
Those thirty pounds will kill me!”

He
acted like he stumbled under her weight.
The jerk.
The
minute he dropped her in the middle of his bed, she scrambled up to a sitting
position. He shut the door and locked it. “Come here.”

“No.”

“I
said, come here.”

“I
said, no.”

He
growled low in his throat. The deep rumbling sound sent shivers down her back.
Her panties were soaked from his manhandling.

“You’re
gonna pay for that.”

“Oh?”

“I’m
gonna have to punish you.”

“Say
what?”

“Ever
been spanked before?” he asked, stalking toward her like a cat on the prowl and
she was the prey.

“You
aren’t going to spank me like a child.” Her pussy clenched at the thought.
What the hell? I want him to spank me?

He
quickly flipped her over onto her stomach, dragged her across his legs and
proceeded to spank her ass. She screamed.

“
Shh
. You’ll do
what I tell you while you’re with me.”

His
hand came down hard on her left cheek, then her right.

“If
I want you to suck my cock, you will without question.”
Smack.
“If I tell you to take your clothes off, you’ll do it
immediately.”
Smack.

“All
right.
I will.” She sniffed back tears she hadn’t realized
she’d been shedding.

He
rubbed her sore cheeks, until she realized the fire in her butt had spread heat
to her pussy.

“I
must be crazy to want this, but it’s making me hot.”

“Ever
heard of BDSM?” he asked, helping her to a sitting position.

“Some.
I’ve read some books with it in it.”

“I’m
not full into it, but I do like to be in control.”

“Obviously.”
She rubbed her butt now that he let her sit up.

“Take
your clothes off.
Your answer?”

“Yes,
Sir?”

“Good
girl. You’ll learn my wants and needs aren’t very particular. I’m not into
whips, floggers and the like, but I might want to tie you up sometimes.”

“And
do what exactly?”

“Eat
you out until you are so wet I could ride your ass with just the juices from
your pussy.”

She’d
never had a man there, but she like the sound of having him eat her out. She
liked when a man did some of those things to her. Not that she’d had a lot of
men in her past, but it sounded good. The few romance novels she’d read with
BDSM in turned her inside out. She just wished she knew where this was going.
They couldn’t have much of a relationship with her living in Houston and his
life being all about the ranch. It’s a drivable distance, but not convenient
for last minute sex.

“I
said take off your clothes.”

She
stood, unbuttoned her shirt and let it fall to the floor behind her. The bra
came next. She wanted to be sexy for him, but she felt inadequate and fat.
After she unhooked her bra, she let the straps slid down her arms, but held it
to her breasts.

“I
want to see.”

“But
I have stretch marks.”

“Why?”

“I
weighed a lot more a few years ago. I topped the scale at over two hundred
pounds. My skin stretched to accommodate.”

“I
love how you look. I’m not into skinny woman. You’ve got curves. I love curves
on my women.”

“Am
I your woman?”

“For
now, yes.”

“I
guess it’s all I can hope for, huh?”

“You
know where I stand on this, Terri. We’ve talked about it.”

“I
know. A girl can wish, right?”

“Don’t
fall in love with me. I don’t want to break your heart.”

Too late.
She sniffed back
the burning of tears.
I already do.

Chapter
Ten

The
moment she stood naked in front of him, she heard him take in a ragged breath.

“Damn,
you’re beautiful.”

“Thanks.”

“I
mean it.” He stood so he could move closer. With his palms, he cupped both of
her breasts in his hands as if he wanted to cherish them. He stepped closer and
took one turgid nipple into his mouth.

A
soft moan broke from her mouth at the suction of his lips.
God, I love when he sucks my nipples.
She threaded her fingers into
his hair, pulling his mouth closer still. His fingers rolled her other nipple
while he sucked the first one until her clit throbbed with the beat of her
heart. When his hand left her breast to trail down her stomach, she brought her
bottom lip between her teeth and bit down to keep from screaming
touch me
. She spread her thighs. His
fingers slipped over her mound and between her legs. She whimpered in need.

The
tip of his finger grazed over her clit, tearing a tortured groan from her lips.
“Yes.”

“On
your back on the bed.”

Her
legs wobbled as she moved to comply. She wanted this…wanted him. “You do have
condoms, right?”

“As
in more than one, yep.”

“Thank
God.” She lay full out on the bed with her head near the top. She didn’t bother
to remove the covers.

He
laughed.
“Greedy wench.”

“You
bet when it comes to you.”

“I’m
glad. I’m
feelin
’ kind of greedy myself tonight.”

“Can
I suck you?”

“Not
now. We need to take the edge off first. I’m about to blow. I probably will the
moment I get inside your hot little pussy.”

“I
need you, Jeff. Please.”

“I
need to do somethin’ first, darlin’. I want to taste you.”

She
spread her thighs as he moved to settle himself between them. The first swipe
of his tongue had her hips coming up off the bed.

“Easy,
darlin’.”

“God,
Jeff.”

Her
pussy felt on fire. She wanted him to hurry, but on the other hand, she needed
him to take his time. She wanted to come. Not too fast, not too slow. It was
torture, pure unadulterated torture.

Within
seconds, she felt heat crawl up her legs and explode in her pelvis, tearing a
muffled scream from her throat.

“Nice
save, babe.”

Sweat
beaded on her upper lip.
Yeah, that’s
sexy.

He
moved over her and took her mouth with his in a deep, penetrating kiss.

“You
still have your clothes on,” she murmured when they broke apart for air.

“I
sure do. Now I want you to undress me.”

“Can
I lick and touch?”

“All
you
want,
darlin’.” He stood up in the middle of the
room with his hands at his sides, just waiting.

She
got to her feet and stopped in front of him to admire the view. His wide chest
tapered to trim hips. He always seemed so cleaned and pressed when she saw him.
With all of the work he did on the ranch, he never seemed to have a hair out of
place. She wanted to ruffle him up.

She
let her lips skim over his jawline as her hands unbuttoned each button on the
front of his shirt, very slowly. When she reached the bottom, she pulled the
material from the waistband of his jeans, letting it flutter to a rest at his
waist. “I love how you taste.”