Heart in Wire: A by a Thread Companion Novel (14 page)

He rose and pulled her out of her chair, into a bear hug. She rested her cheek on his chest for a second and it was like paradise. Her here, with him only, needing him only. He smoothed her raven locks back gently.

“What happened?” He’d already heard from Billy, who met her for drinks last night, that Jamie had attacked her during a run. Patrick had already decided she would no longer run without him.

“I know you know. You guys are like the fucking Siamese twins.” She smiled, but her heart wasn’t in it and she looked worn down.

“We’ll run together from now on.” He squeezed her harder and then sat back down.

She slumped back into the chair. El never pretended with him, she never acted like she was okay when she wasn’t. And she most certainly wasn’t okay.

“I don’t know what to do, Patrick. I’m pissed. I’m tired. I just need him to go away, to leave me the fuck alone, once and for all.”

“So what’s the plan?” Patrick prodded.

“The same as before. I want to get the FBI to arrest him; now it’s just a little more urgent.” She ran her good hand through her hair, which was now falling right at her shoulders. Her green eyes looked at him, wide and clear. “He just fucking attacked me, Patrick, right there on the street. He’s getting more brazen. His hubris will be the death of him.”

El didn’t know how right her words were, Patrick was depending on Jamie’s hubris.

“I’ve called Harris and said I’d do a recording, but I want to make sure I’ve got all my bases covered. Let’s plan while we run?” She lifted her green eyes to his in question.

Patrick nodded. While he understood the situation, there was a part of him that was elated that she needed him and he’d get to see her daily again. “El, we’ll get him,” he assured her.

“I hope so,” she said and looked toward the backyard, avoiding eye contact with him. “If not, I’m pretty sure I’m dead.” She got up and walked in the house, leaving him with that thought.

It was in that moment he knew with certainty that Plan C would be necessary and he could do it. He wouldn’t live without her. He couldn’t live without her.

Chapter Eleven

TWO LIES AND A TRUTH

Patrick closed his eyes and leaned back into the uncomfortable seat; he hated to fly. No one knew this, or any of his fears, for that matter. He didn’t let anyone see what was underneath the surface of his calm façade. The worry that he wouldn’t be able to save El, the trepidation that he would be unsuccessful in his planning, the guilt that he felt leaving his family…everything was bubbling within him; he didn’t have a moment’s peace. He was flying to Atlanta to meet with Jesse and Frank so they could plan the logistics of killing Jamie. He was going to kill someone, and not just
someone
, but a friend. He used to be a friend, he reminded himself. Thoughts of Jamie and how he’d crushed El washed over his mind.

El’s birthday had been a fucking disaster. She’d gotten drunk and made a total ass of herself at Finnegan’s. He’d basically carried her out to the car after she fell off the barstool, showing everyone that she didn’t have underwear on. She passed out on the ride home, her tank top slipping off one shoulder and her skirt hiking up her thighs.

Patrick shook his head to clear the thoughts of her. She wasn’t his. He’d really been trying to help her, but if she didn’t get through this shit soon, he was going to tell her everything. It was breaking him inside to live this lie with her when she was so devastated.

Opening the door to his Audi, he pulled her up and threw her over his shoulder to carry her into the house. Billy stayed at the bar because he was likely getting some action from a cute girl he’d been working on for the last couple of weeks. Cooper met them at the door, his tail wagging its perpetual beat.

“Hey, bud,” Patrick called over his shoulder as Cooper followed them into the basement.

He laid El down gently and pulled off her flip flops. He looked at her sprawled across her bed, her hair splayed over her face and the pillow. She was a beautifully broken creature that he didn’t know how to fix. Sighing, he pulled the covers down and rolled her over, then pulled the covers back up. Cooper hopped on the bed and laid his head on the pillow right next to her.

Patrick walked back upstairs, pulled a bottle of Honey Jack whiskey out of the cabinet, and poured himself a very tall glass. It’d been eight months since he first told El that Jamie was dead and every day seemed to be worse than the last. He couldn’t tell her the truth, could he? Maybe he could come up with some way to tell her without really telling her.

He finished his drink at the kitchen table in the dark and walked to his room, taking his clothes off and falling into bed. Sleep came quickly.

His door opening woke him up, and then he felt her get into his bed, naked. Good God, this girl was going to be the death of him. He would die from blue balls. He turned into her, pulling her close to him. She’d probably had another dream. They’d been sleeping together a lot lately. If this is what she needed, he could do that. He owed her that much.

Her smell woke him early and he was immediately met with a massive erection. Fuck. He needed to get laid. He pulled his arm out from under her head, trying not to wake her. He sat on the side of the bed, looking into the darkness, watching the morning come through his window. He needed to get laid immediately.

This was getting out of hand.

Patrick’s eyes drifted open as the feel of El disappeared. He pulled out his phone and earbuds, clicking on a playlist that Millie made for him, hoping to keep his dreams at bay. He kept reminding himself why he was doing this, why he was making this trip—it was all to protect her. It was either El or Jamie. Jamie had made that clear. He’d tried to kill her before and now he was here to finish the job.

Patrick dropped into his chair behind his desk; he’d been at the shooting range this morning with a bunch of the guys.

“Greer!” he heard Kevin call him from his supervisor’s office.

Patrick didn’t even get a chance to check his email before he got up and walked into Agent Spring’s office.

“What’s up?” Patrick asked.

Kevin was sitting behind his desk, his two fingers on the bridge of his nose.

“Kevin?”

“Sit down.”

“What’s going on?” Patrick asked again, getting a little nervous.

“There’s been a terrorist attack. We’re sending people out to Montana now.”

Patrick blinked.

“There was a bomb detonated at 10:15 eastern time this morning. From what we know now, there are causalities and injuries. That’s all we’re getting so far. We’ve sent an additional team.”

El. His insides seized at the thought. He wouldn’t allow himself to think she was a casualty.

“Send me,” Patrick blurted.

El.

“We’ve already sent the team, Greer. Your roommate is one of the...” he cleared his throat, “bodies.”

“She’s dead,” Patrick stated.

“I don’t know for sure, but her name was mentioned when they were talking about individuals present.”

He couldn’t breathe. Kevin was talking, but Patrick couldn’t hear anything, just a rushing in his ears. He looked out the window of Kevin’s office. She wasn’t dead; he’d know if she was dead. He’d feel it because she was in his bones. He still felt her, right?

“Greer.”

“Sir?” His thoughts snapped to the present.

“You’re on administrative leave until we figure out what’s happened. With pay, of course. Hopefully, we’ll know something in a few hours. Go home. We’ll keep you updated.”

Patrick stayed seated. “Sir. I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. Get out of here. I promise I’ll let you know what’s going on as soon as I know anything.”

“Don’t send me home to think! Let me help!”

“Nope. Go home.” Kevin stood up, signaling the meeting was over. “I’ll keep in touch.”

Patrick sat for another minute before he got up, nodded his head, and walked to the elevator. His hands shook as he called El on the way. It went straight to voicemail. He texted her.

You okay

It took three separate attempts to get those two words typed on his phone. Please be okay. She didn’t respond.

Patrick felt
anesthetized, his limbs heavy and numb, while he rode the
elevator down to the parking garage. He started his Audi. When he blinked, he was parked in front of Finnegan’s. He sat in his car and stared out his windshield. Millie, he should call Millie.

He punched her name.

“Babe?” she answered her phone.

“Um,” he mumbled, not sure where to start.

“Patrick? What’s going on?” Millie’s voice rang through the quiet car.

Patrick heard a hitch of concern in her voice.

“Have you watched the news?”

“No. I’ve been watching a webinar about education law. Why? You okay?”

“There was a terrorist attack in Montana.”

The sound he heard through the phone reverberated through is chest. It was the same noise he was making on the inside.

“I don’t know anything yet. She may be okay.”

“Please, no,” Millie whispered.

“I don’t know anything.” His voice was low, not wanting to say anything out loud, like that would somehow seal her fate.

“Patrick...” Millie dropped her phone.

“Mil?” Patrick sat up straight in his car. “Millie!?” he yelled. The call disconnected.

He hit his steering wheel hard.
Patrick texted her again.

El please let me know you’re okay

Another text.

Please

He knew she was pissed at him, but she’d respond if she was okay, he knew it. She had to know that he would be freaking out. She’d told him she hated him and he saw it in her eyes. Hate and rage at his deception filled her eyes when she’d looked at him before she left for Montana two days ago. When she told him she hated him, she really meant it. When she’d picked George over him, he’d lost a piece of himself the piece that she didn’t even know she held in her hands. He took a deep breath and opened his car door, walking into Finnegan’s. Patrick walked through the front door, examining his phone, sending a text to Kevin to keep him updated and then to Millie to text El. He heard his name called before he looked up into George’s eyes.

“What’s going on?” George asked from behind the bar.

“Okay, don’t freak out...” Patrick put his phone in his back pocket. His voice didn’t even sound like his own. He said those words without thinking about them, because his brain was full of chaos and he didn’t have complete thoughts. At the core of it all, he was trying to feel her, feel that she was okay.