Heartland (16 page)

Was he upset that he was attracted to her? Or was it something else? Did he think she was like his dead wife? She pushed the questions aside. “When my manager admitted me to Fernwood in February, I had no intention of staying. I honestly believed I wasn’t an addict. Even though I finally admitted it to the medical director when he told me I was pregnant, I didn’t totally believe I was one.” When he glanced at her again, she swallowed down her sudden wish for clothes. Baring her soul to him seemed more intimidating while doing it stark naked. “But I changed my thinking when I went into withdrawal. I never reached that point before because I would check myself out before the shakes and night sweats got too bad.”

“What was different this time?” His voice echoed with the thunder out on the prairie. “Why did you stay?”

“I remembered how my dad’s mom died.”

With a furrowed brow, he faced her. “She was a local singer who overdosed on sleeping pills, right?”

Emily nodded and crossed her arms in front of her and shivered more from her discomfort of confessing her soul in the buff than from the cool air coming from the vent by her feet.

He turned toward the bed and pulled back the covers. “C’mon, let’s get back into bed.”

After she followed him between the crisp white sheets, he pulled her to him. She snuggled against his chest and relished his warmth seeping into her. “My grandmother lived a troubled life and eventually ended it when Dad was four years old. He told me for most of his life he thought his parents hated him: his mother because she blamed him for trapping her in a loveless marriage that cheated her out of becoming famous, and his father because he disliked Dad’s dream of becoming a singer. My grandfather repeatedly berated Dad, telling him he’d end up like his mother--an addict and dead if he pursued his dreams.” She closed her eyes against the sudden burn in her sinuses. “Instead it was me who followed in my grandmother’s footsteps. If I didn’t stop the drugs, they would’ve killed me.”

Swallowing the knot in her throat, she rested her hand over her belly. “My baby would be all alone, if she even survived, and I couldn’t do that to her. She’d grow up thinking I hated her and Fabian didn’t want her. That was when I admitted I was an addict and made a conscious decision to get clean. My baby deserves a momma who loves her. And I do. More than anything.”

“That’s what fascinates me about you, Emily.” He laid his hand over hers and her baby. “You are the most unselfish person I know.”

She shivered and a tear escaped as he kissed her.

He couldn’t be more wrong.

Chapter 13

Emily awoke to EJ spooning her from behind and his hand resting on her belly. His deep and slow breaths tickled her shoulder and neck. The enticing bulge of his impressive cock pressed into her behind. A sense of contentment like she’d never experienced settled over her as she listened to his breathing and watched the dust motes glittering like tiny snowflakes in the early morning sunbeams.

She could wake up every morning like this. God, she wanted to. She wanted him. Not only sexually, not only as her best friend, but also as the man she would share the rest of her life with. Closing her eyes, she fought the sorrow rushing into the places of her heart where a moment ago she’d had peace and love.

God help her, but she’d fallen in love with him. Damn it, what had she ever done to piss off the cosmos? Why would fate finally bring her a good and honest man, the kind of man she would want as the father of her child when she couldn’t have him?

She sucked in a breath when EJ slowly moved his hand from her belly to cover her left breast. Her sensitive nipples instantly responded to his touch, and she moaned. She looked over her shoulder at him and her breath caught at the cowboy god in her bed. Mussed dark blond hair hung over his forehead and caramel colored stubble covered his face, while desire deepened the gray of his heavy lidded eyes. With a gorgeous smile, he kissed her shoulder. “Good morning, beautiful.”

Heat filled her and settled in her core at his gruff words. Holy hell, could the man be any more perfect? “Ditto.”

His deep chuckle vibrated through her. He turned her onto her back and kissed her. She nipped at his lower lip, then opened her mouth under his, and he plunged his tongue in, turning the passion up to toe-curling. After breaking the kiss, he moved his hot, wet lips to her breast. While pinching the hard nipple of her left breast between his thumb and finger, he sucked on the other one. As she moaned and arched her back into the tingling pleasure, she threaded her fingers into his silky hair and held him to her.

He moved his lips to the valley between her breasts and placed soft kisses, his stubble creating its own set of tingling sensations. “Your breasts are perfect.”

She met his heavy gaze and feathered her fingers over his temple to his hair. “You’re perfect.”

With a grin, he took the other nipple into his mouth and sucked while he moved his hand over her belly to her mound. She spread her legs to allow his fingers access to the achy, wet folds of her sex. She gasped at the fiery vibrations caused by the combination of his sucking her nipple and his circling caress of her clit.

Too soon he moved and she opened her eyes as he settled between her legs. He lifted her leg and kissed the inside of her knee. “Before I’m done, you will be begging me.”

“Promises, promises.” She laughed low and breathy.

He smirked before kissing the sensitive skin of her inner thigh. “I never make a promise I don’t keep.” Another nipping kiss, this time closer to the apex of her legs. “And I’ll guarantee before I’m done with you, you’ll be screaming my name.”

Her breathing quickened at his sexy crude words. Damn, she was already close and he hadn’t even touched her yet. “You’re quite sure of yourself.”

EJ kissed the inside of her other leg before looking up at her. “Yes, ma’am, I am.”

When he bent his head, she trembled with anticipation.

“I love this smooth pussy.” He kissed her folds, before spreading them to suck her bud of nerves.

She cried out and clawed at the sheets. “EJ… Oh… I’m going to come.”

Before the waves of pleasure built to the pinnacle, he stopped his ministrations and nipped her inner thigh. She whimpered a protest and writhed as he left her hanging for a moment, then he found her clit again, this time nipping and licking until she went even higher than before. He repeated the torturous process again of stopping before she tipped over the top.

“EJ!” She arched her back off the bed and twisted her hands into the bedding. “Please…”

“Please--what?” he said inches away from the center. His deep voice rumbled through her. “Tell me.” He blew on her hot flesh, and she shivered at the first hints of orgasm, but the stimulation was not quite enough to send her off.

“Damn… you… You know… what.” Her words came out breathless and pleading. “Let me… come.”

He chuckled and then sucked her into his hot mouth at the same time as he slipped two fingers into her. She flew apart in a blinding wave of light and pleasure that had her thrashing and crying his name.

When she finally came back together and opened her eyes, EJ looked down at her with a sexy, cocky grin. She’d give him credit where due. “Wow.”

He sucked her earlobe, causing her to shiver, which set off a flurry of orgasmic aftershocks. “I’m not done.” He nipped her ear and tilted her hips. Another shudder went through her as the head of his cock touched her. “You ready for more?”

Although her arms felt like jelly, she wrapped them around his neck and used her nails to claw at his back, causing him to tremble. “Are you?”

As he kissed her, he thrust forward and entered her. She groaned and sucked on his tongue. He set a fast pace and before she thought physically possible, he had her flying again. She met him thrust for thrust as she clawed at his back. He tossed his head back and gritted his teeth as if fighting for control. With a groan, he leaned forward and buried his head into her neck. “Come with me.”

“EJ… Oh, God…” The sensations built to blinding intensity higher than before, and she hung on as every nerve seemed to explode at once. Screaming his name, over and over she became vaguely aware of EJ letting out a long, feral growl, which might have been her name, as he shoved into her and stilled.

Gasping for air, he fell to the bed next to her. “Damn… That was amazing.”

She turned her head to look at him and smiled. “Next time--” she said between heavy breaths--“you’ll be begging me.”

* * * *

After showering together and getting dressed, they headed down to the kitchen. EJ went out to feed his horses, while Emily checked in with her people in Nashville. She’d called both her manager and assistant last night to tell them about Mike’s sighting outside Nashville and to instruct them to release her whereabouts to the media.

When he reentered the kitchen, he made a cup of coffee. Emily laid her cell phone on the counter by the refrigerator.

“I couldn’t get hold of Kelly, but Trish said she got word out to TMZ last night and they will run the story today. Also she said someone from
Good Morning America
contacted her this morning requesting a statement about Mike after his spotting in Nashville made the news. She was putting them off, but I told her to go ahead and contact the producer. I won’t do an interview, but I will issue a statement.”

Every time he thought of Emily making herself bait for Mike, his stomach turned to cement. “I still wish you wouldn’t do this.”

She frowned and opened the fridge door. “We’ve already been over this. It’s the only way to catch him.”

Emily held the door open and rubbed a hand over her swollen abdomen. Dressed in stretchy black shorts, a purple tank top, and nothing else, she looked like she belonged in his kitchen and as hot as hell. When she rubbed her bare foot against the back of her other leg as if she had an itch, he fought the urge of grabbing her and having a repeat of their earlier escapades on the kitchen table.

She glanced his way, raised a coppery brow over heated jade eyes, and blew him a kiss. He chuckled and retrieved his cup of coffee from the Keurig. If he didn’t do something to distract himself, she wouldn’t have to even touch him to have him begging her for a repeat of their round of sex that morning. The memory made him hard.

She grabbed the jug of milk, a package of cheese, and a carton of eggs. After she set the items on the counter beside him, she peered into the fridge again and frowned.

“What are you looking for?” He grinned at the pucker she twisted her extremely kissable lips into.

She moved a few items around on a shelf. “Some peppers or hot sauce.” Closing the door, she signed. “You wouldn’t happen to have any, would you?”

He opened a cupboard door and took down a mason jar of sliced peppers. “Clare canned these earlier this summer. Jalapenos and chilies. But I’ll warn you--they’re hot enough to set your tongue on fire.”

With a wide smile, she took the jar and looked at it. “These are perfect. The hotter, the better.”

Glancing at her collection of items, he picked up the milk and poured some into his coffee. “What are you going to make?”

“An omelet. I’m starving, and for the past few weeks I’ve been craving hot peppers and eggs. This is perfect.” She looked around before turning her gaze on him. “Where are your pans?”

He pointed to the cabinet next to the stove. “You should be able to find whatever you need in there.”

“Would you like one?” She got out a skillet and set it on the burner.

“Sure. I’d love one.” While she went about mixing up omelets, he made her a cup of tea. The sight of her being at home in his kitchen stabbed his heart with longing. He’d fallen in love with her and wanted her to stay in his life forever. How could he get through to her that she didn’t have to base her baby’s upbringing on her own? He’d love to be a father to her child, but he didn’t expect her to keep her ex a secret or to keep him away from his daughter. After all, he wouldn’t keep Raquel’s memories from Austin, though he hoped Emily filled the void of mother in his little boy’s life.

His son had taken a real liking to Emily, and she was great with him. Would she think the same way concerning Austin’s relationship with her if she wasn’t pregnant, or if he was divorced rather than widowed?

Because it was too soon to confront her, he pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He had no idea how she felt about him, but they definitely had a connection going way beyond friendship with benefits. Before he and Raquel married, he’d played the field enough to know how casual sex felt, and comparing those experiences with what he and Emily had was like equating water with fine Tennessee whiskey.

Emily plated the two concoctions, while he set his coffee and her tea on the table. When she put the dishes down, he grinned. “These smell and look delicious.”

“Thanks. I’m not much of a cook, but I can make omelets.” She sat down across from him and started eating. After a few bites, she fixed her tea with sugar and took a sip. They ate in relative silence until her phone started buzzing. She retrieved it from the counter and answered it. “Hey, Trish, what’s going on?”

After a moment, she fell against the counter and her face went as white as the fridge door. He rushed to her and grabbed her before she slipped to the floor. After taking the phone from her shaking hand, he held it to his ear. “Who is this? I’m Sheriff EJ Cowley.”