Heaven Scent (29 page)

Patrick said, “Rafe has struggled with
this since his return. But not more so than the last few days,
knowing he would have to… reveal himself to you.”

Henry’s voice sounded loud in the
somber room. “Surely he knows my daughter would not reject him for
something so superficial?”

Patrick shook his head. “On the
contrary, he believes she will feel revulsion.”

Tarin stilled. How could he think such
a thing? How could he think her love based solely on his
features?

Apparently, she had to make a few
things clear to her future husband.

“You see, Henry,” Isabel added, “Rafe
has always used his handsomeness to get what he wanted. He believed
it was all he had in life.” She dabbed at her nose with Beau’s
handkerchief. “As you know, Colin was very tough on him - Rafe
never could do anything to please his father. Yet, he continually
strived to be perfect, only to fail time and again.“

She sighed with despondency. “In his
rebellion, Rafe used his charm and handsomeness on the young girls.
That was the only place where he found a modicum of success in his
life. So he used it all of the time. Unfortunately, he returned
from Texas without the only upper hand he knew. He is misplaced
without the confidence of his attractiveness.”

Tarin sat up in her chair. Yes, of
course. It all made sense. His insecurity continually weighed him
down, while the ingrained charm surfaced on occasion. She could see
it so clearly now.

He believed he was unlovable. When in
fact, she loved him more than ever.

At the sound of rapid, heavy boot steps
in the foyer, they all turned towards the door. Tarin held her
breath. Rafe appeared for a split second, storming past without a
glance their way. Opening the front door, he slammed it behind
him.

Her stomach clenched. How could he just
leave that way? They had so much to discuss.

She jumped up to follow him.

“Give him time, daughter,” Henry
warned, with a reassuring pat on her shoulder.

“What if he does not return?” Panic
clenched her chest. “What if he is leaving Boston
again?”

She saw Isabel and Patrick exchange a
worried glance. Everyone in the room knew the possibility was
there. He had done it before.

And Tarin knew she could not live
without him. He had become more important to her than the college
could ever be, more important than becoming a physician. In that
moment of panic, she wanted to be his wife and mother of his
children above all. Nothing else mattered.

Turning around in the chair, she
gripped her father’s arm. “I cannot lose Rafe. Please father, help
me get him back.”

######

“My daughter asked me to find you and
by God, I am going to take you to her.”

Turning in his chair, Rafe glanced over
his shoulder at Henry Worthington. The bastard glared down his nose
at Rafe while the men around the club stared at them with avid
interest. Henry was the reason Rafe was in this mess. If
Worthington hadn’t approached him with his damned deal, Rafe
wouldn’t be here now, wishing he was normal. Wishing he had what
Tarin wanted.

He wasn’t three sheets to the wind yet,
but he was getting there. And he didn’t want to be
interrupted.

“Is that so, Worthington? You and who’s
militia?” Rafe turned back around and took a drink of his
bourbon.

He glared at the wealthy, well-dressed
men staring at him from the other tables. Rafe glanced down at his
denims and open-collar shirt and smirked.

“I never pegged you for a self-pitying
coward, Sutherland.”

Rafe’s stomach clenched a second before
he shot up from his chair. Whipping around, he grabbed Henry by the
collar and pulled him to within an inch of his face.

“This from a man that cowers in front
of his own daughter?”

Henry’s green eyes blazed
with anger in his red face. “Isn’t that the reason
you
are here?”

Rafe felt the blow as sure
as if he’d punched him in the face. That
was
the reason he was here, wasn’t
it? He was afraid of facing Tarin after what she had seen. Afraid
his fears had all come to fruition.

Slowly, he released Henry. “You’re
right,” he said in a low voice. Rafe sat back down at the table and
picked up his drink. “And I have no intention of ever facing
her.”

“What?” Henry cried, plopping down in
the chair opposite Rafe. “You would stand up my daughter at the
altar?”

“Altar?!” Rafe gave a bitter chuckle.
“She would no sooner marry me now than if I had the ability to make
her a damned physician.”

“You’re wrong,” Henry said lowly. “She
would marry you now if you wanted to meet her at the
church.”

Frowning, Rafe swirled around the
liquid in his glass. How could that be? How could the most
beautiful woman in Boston want a creature like him?

“She doesn’t want me, Henry. You want
me and talked her into it.”

Worthington grumbled under his breath
before saying, “She wanted you from the moment she met you. I saw
it that first night at your home.” He folded his hands on top of
the table. “I just capitalized on it.”

Blowing out a breath, Rafe slumped in
his chair. He knew she had been attracted to him. They had shared
soul-searching love in the Cabot garden and kisses he would kill a
man over should he try them on her.

But now? Could she ever share his
bed?

“Did it ever cross your
mind why I am here?” Henry asked. “Why
I
, rather than a hired hand, had
bothered to search for you at all?”

Rafe met Henry’s gaze. No, actually, it
hadn’t crossed his mind. But now that he thought about it, Henry
had nothing to gain by this marriage. No financial benefits or
political profit. Yes, he would gain a husband for his daughter,
but they both knew he could force that at any time.

Henry laughed to himself. “I see it
hasn’t. After you walked out tonight, Tarin told me, and I quote,
‘I cannot lose Rafe. Please father, help me get him
back.’”

Rafe’s eyes widened.

“And you know Rafe, I deny my daughter
nothing.”

Rafe stared down at the table, his body
still in disbelief. She wanted him? She actually still wanted
him?

This time, Henry sat back and laughed.
“Let’s go, Sutherland.” He stood and tossed some coin on the table.
“You two are getting married in the morning and Tarin needs her
rest.”

If there was a chance she could love
him despite his flaws, he owed it to her to know the truth. He was
tired of the secrets.

Rafe grabbed Worthington's wrist to
stop him. “If I go back, I tell her of our deal.”

Stilling, Henry slowly dropped down in
the chair. He looked around the room before leaning forward, elbows
on the table. “Listen here, you cocky bastard, I have given you the
opportunity of a lifetime. You tell her and the deal is
off.”

“It’s not about the money anymore,
Worthington.” Rafe sat back in his chair and met his gaze dead on.
“I love Tarin and if she’s got to live with me like this, then she
deserves to know the truth.”

Brows raised, Henry‘s back went rigid.
“You would risk your family’s welfare…”

Rafe nodded.

“She will hate me, Sutherland - and
you.”

He gave another brief nod. “That is a
chance I am willing to take. I do not want to go into this marriage
with a lie on my conscience. Either Tarin has full knowledge or
it’s off.”

Wincing, Rafe waited for Henry’s
decision. The thought of losing her was like a knife to his chest.
And he couldn’t even think about the sacrifice to his family. But,
he wanted her only if she came to him of her own free will. He
needed to know she wanted him scars and all, with no barriers
between them.

“Very well, Sutherland. But hear me and
hear me now. If my daughter disowns me, I will make your life a
living hell.”

Smirking, Rafe stood. “I’ve been
through living hell and survived, Worthington. You don’t scare
me.”

No, it wasn’t Henry that scared him. It
was his stubborn, beautiful daughter that scared the shit out of
him.

God above, please tell him he was doing
the right thing.

Chapter 16

When he returned, Tarin was going to
give Rafe Sutherland a piece of her mind.

Pacing the Sutherland library as Isabel
and Beau looked on, she’d had hours to think about what had
transpired here tonight and frankly, she was quite
miffed.

How dare he think her so shallow as to
reject him for his physical scars? And how dare he worry her,
knowing she loved him beyond reason?

And what in
blazes
was he doing naked
in his bedroom in the first place, when he should have been
downstairs in the parlor with the family?

“Tarin, you are going to wear a hole in
the carpet.”

Isabel came up beside her and put an
arm around Tarin’s shoulders. “Why don’t you go upstairs and lie
down? I will wake you as soon as Henry and Rafe return.”

Tarin chewed her bottom lip. Perhaps,
sending her father to look for Rafe had been a mistake. Beau and
Patrick had offered in his stead, but her father had
insisted.

Henry Worthington was not the most
compassionate of men and Tarin wondered if compassion was what Rafe
needed right now.

She clenched her fists in her skirts.
No, Tarin thought, what Rafe needed right now was a swift kick in
the -

“Tarin.”

She stilled. Whipping her head around,
she breathed a sigh of relief. Rafe stood behind the sofa, her
father nowhere to be seen. He looked bedraggled with his long,
mussed hair and wrinkled, western clothes. His eyes were bloodshot
and round with worry.

She had never seen a more beautiful
sight.

“Rafe…” She ran to him, tears swimming
in her eyes.

He caught her up in his arms and
squeezed her to the point of breathlessness. Inhaling deeply, his
nose burrowed in her hair. “God, I love you, Tarin.”

Utter joy stopped her heart. Rafe had
never said the words before but she had hoped and dreamed they
would make their way to his lips someday. She struggled to pull
away, to shower his face with kisses, but he held her to
him.

“I love you, too.”

He released her, only to clutch her
face in his palms and stare at her intently. He smelled of liquor
and cigar smoke, his breathing heavy. “Do you, Tarin? Do you love
me - even after all you’ve seen?”

She smiled, knowing she could give him
the assurance he needed. “Yes, Rafe. I love you more today than I
ever have.”

Expecting him to sweep her into his
arms again, she stumbled when he released her completely. He strode
across the room to stare out the window. The stillness told her
they were alone.

“There is something you should know,
Tarin.”

The joy in her heart dropped to her
stomach. A sense of foreboding enveloped her, bringing with it
instant nausea.

She took a deep breath and released it.
“If I should know then, by all means, tell me.”

He turned to look at her but said
nothing. His eyes were black as the night sky, his jaw clenched
tight.

She took a step closer. The tension
clouding the air told her to be cautious. “Tell me,
Rafe.”

He looked at the floor, as though
looking for answers there. When he raised his gaze to her again,
determination shown bright in his eyes. “You are the most beautiful
woman I have ever seen…”

Her fists clenched in her skirts.
Somehow, the compliment did not feel like a compliment at all. Rafe
never told her she was beautiful. He had always admired her other
attributes more.

“And I -” he swallowed, “I am…
flawed.”

She did not acknowledge his statement,
afraid any sign of agreement would silence him.

“What man in my situation would pursue
a woman of your beauty?”

She took an internal sigh of relief.
Was that all this was?

Tarin grinned. “A man of supreme
arrogance.”

He gave her a small, lopsided grin
before sobering again. “Or one desperate for money.”

The nausea roared to life in her
stomach. It pitched and turned, causing Tarin to clutch her
stomach.

“No…” She backed towards the
door.

He followed her, step for step. “Your
father approached me with a deal - if I could persuade you to marry
me, he would give me his shipping for life.”

Oh, God…

“And your family is struggling…” She
looked away, her body rigid with shock.

They had betrayed her. The two people
she loved most in the world had lied to her.

Her mother had told her not to allow
her father to arrange a marriage. She had told Tarin to marry for
love.