Her Summer Cowboy (7 page)

“Right here. What’s up?”

Jason looked at Emma and then back to Hudson. “It’s time to pull out. Alan was looking for you.”

“No problem,” Hudson said. “I was just stretching my legs before we hit the road.”

“Thanks for talking to me about the horse act,” Emma said with a smile that didn’t fool him. She might be comfortable asking him to be her summer lover but she clearly didn’t want everyone in their little traveling world to know about it.

He watched her walk away. That woman was pricklier than a cactus. He was sure if he could get past all her barriers and have some uninterrupted time with her that he might be able to figure her out, but there was a part of him that wasn’t entirely sure.

“What was that about?”

“You know Alan and his obsession with the horse act; he wants Emma to ride and she’s a little nervous around horses.”

“Yeah, everyone knows about that accident she had when she was ten,” Jason said.

“I don’t. What happened?” Hudson asked. Well that explained why she’d tried to get out of it at first but being Emma she didn’t let her fear control her. His respect for her rose another notch.

“She was thrown and broke her collarbone. It happened one of the summers she was touring with Alan and Keith,” Jason said.

“How long have you been with them?” Hudson asked as they got back to the area where all the vehicles were.

“Too long, man, too long. Listen, Alan asked us to make a rotation schedule so you won’t have to drive the horse trailer at night. I’ve got two guys ready to do it tonight,” Jason said.

“Nah, I’m good. I’m too wired from the show to sleep. Maybe in a few nights.”

“Fair enough. Just let me know when you need someone to spell you,” Jason said, walking away. “Don’t forget Alan wanted to see you.”

Hudson walked over to his truck and trailer, checked on his horses and then went to Alan’s tour bus. He rapped on the door.

“Come in.”

He stepped inside to find Emma sitting at the table with a notepad in front of her and Alan sitting in a big armchair with his guitar.

“You wanted to see me?” Hudson said.

“I was just going to send you out after Emma,” Alan said. “But she made her way back. Did you eat?”

“Yeah, I’m good. I’ll see you both in the morning.”

“Wait up, son. I told Jason to have the crew take care of your truck. You should be riding in here with us.”

“I don’t mind driving,” Hudson said. And he especially didn’t mind being away from Emma until he could sort a few more things out.

“Too danged bad. I can’t have you perform and then drive,” Alan said. “You’re riding with us.”

Arguing with Alan got him nowhere so twenty minutes later he found himself wedged on the padded bench next to Emma playing Trivial Pursuit against her and Alan. This summer trip was getting more and more complicated by the day.

Emma was distracted and he didn’t really feel like playing a game so he faked that he was tired and left them sitting at the table. He climbed onto his bunk, which was a twin-sized bed barely long enough for his frame unless he curled to his side.

He drew the drape between them closed and pretended that he wasn’t listening to her voice. Listening to the way she teased her grandfather and wishing that he had more time to kiss her tonight. Really kiss her and make her feel like she was his.

Alan started playing his guitar and Emma sang along with him and without meaning to, Hudson closed his eyes. He drifted off to sleep with the image of the two of them alone in the field behind the ranch house he’d grown up in Marietta. The sun was shining and his horse was nearby and he and Emma were tangled together on a blanket.

She wore that flirty little sundress she’d had on the first day they met and he pulled her onto his lap and she rocked against him. He rolled over and tucked her underneath and woke up as he almost fell out of his bunk.

Dammit. This wasn’t working. He couldn’t sleep in here with Emma. She was tormenting him without even trying.

He put his feet on the floor and got out of the bunk. Time had passed. He glanced at his battered old watch and saw it was almost dawn. He’d had enough of trying to sleep. Hopefully they’d be making a stop soon and he could get back in his truck.

Back to his reality where he was following Emma not sleeping near her. It was foolish to think he could hear her breathing or sense her presence, but a part of him was sure that he could.

He shook his head and went to the bathroom to splash water on his face. Then he went to the kitchen/living area surprised to see Alan sitting in a chair with his eyes closed, glasses on and an open book on his chest. He woke him and sent him to bed and then sat there alone searching for answers to questions he wasn’t sure he wanted answered.

*

Emma woke up
early after a restless night where she kept hearing snippets of old songs in her head and then the words for new ones dancing around with them. She had a very strange dream where she’d ridden on stage on Hudson’s horse and sang lead on a song that had been her dad’s.

She got dressed and went out to the kitchen/living area and found that it was empty. She made some coffee, the one cup she allowed herself every day. She was careful to manage anything that was addictive. She knew from the way she tended to obsess over things that she definitely had her daddy’s addictive streak.

So she had one cup. Sometimes, and she hated herself for this, but sometimes she felt a little superior that she was able to manage it. She shook her head, stuck her tongue out at herself in the reflection of the microwave and went to talk to the driver. She offered him coffee but he said he was okay, that Hudson had made him a cup a few hours earlier.

“Do you know where he is?” she asked.

“Sleeping I’d guess.”

Emma went back to the table, glancing at the curtain that closed off Hudson’s sleeping quarters. She’d seen him toss his duffle bag in there when they’d left Tennessee but she had no idea what he’d brought with him.

She wanted to talk to him alone. To find out if that kiss had changed things for him the way it had for her. Summer affair was no longer an option for her. She liked him and she wanted to just get to know the man. Not be worried about figuring out the future before it had a chance to unfold.

She took a moment to look at the lyrics she’d been working on. At first she thought her song was about Gramps. An old troubadour who was nearing the end of the road. But instead the more she wrote, the more the image was changing in her mind to be this young guy. Traveling because he didn’t want life to catch up with him.

She played the lyrics and remembered what Hudson had said the night before about thinking his brother was gone. Lost. Death had been a major influence on her, and she knew no matter how far or fast she ran she could never leave that fallout behind. It was with her always. Some days it was the sweet memory of fishing with her parents—her mom accidently hooking her dad in the butt. Others it was the anger of watching daddy drink and swear he wouldn’t again. That this time he’d quit.

There were so many things that couldn’t be outrun simply because she decided she wanted to shove them in the past. She’d told herself that in Georgia teaching school she was in a safe place but she realized she’d been hiding. Doing the same running thing that Hudson had done by traveling and roaming all over the country.

But his way seemed a little more honest, she thought. He wasn’t pretending he was normal and had adjusted to life. He’d taken to the road and tried to outrun it.

She got the feeling he hadn’t succeeded much more than she had.

She’d been existing but hadn’t realized it until last night when she’d stood next to that cowboy, flirting with him and he’d completely shamed her with his honesty. She’d been hiding in plain sight for too long. Hiding from Gramps and the past but mostly hiding from herself.

Not for any reason other than she’d been afraid. Afraid of letting her hair down and maybe losing the control she’d always prided herself on. She shook her head and jotted that down on her notepad. These words were a jumble and a mess. They were still in her head; the feeling, the thoughts seemed to make sense in there but when she put them down, she felt foolish.

Why did she keep trying to pursue this dream?

Why not? She’d failed once but that didn’t mean she couldn’t get better. She got up and made herself a second cup of coffee. It was time to relax her control. Just like it was time for her to start being a lot more honest about how she felt.

She wanted Hudson in her bed, beyond that she had no idea. She’d felt brazen when she’d told him that the first time. Last night, though, she’d seen herself for the coward she was. Running from the truth and running from herself.

“Morning, girl,” Gramps said, coming up the hallway. “Thought I smelled coffee. Are we allowed to drink that instead of carrot juice?”

He came over and gave her a kiss on her forehead.

“You should know we are since you got me addicted to it.”

“I did, didn’t I?” he asked, making himself a cup. “You used to scurry out of bed as soon as you heard the coffee pot start.”

She smiled at the memory. She used to try to wake up early so she’d get to share a cup of coffee with Gramps before everyone else was awake. He’d make her a demi-tasse that was filled with sweet milk and a splash of coffee.

He carried his cup over and sat down next to her. Glanced at her notepad and then back at her. “You writing again?”

“Not really. Just keep having ideas,” she said. “I’m putting it on the paper to get it out of my head.”

He pulled her notepad to him and looked at the things she’d jotted. “You writing about me?”

“I thought so but now I’m not so sure,” she admitted.

He looked like he had more questions, but Hudson woke up and joined them. Emma was ready to chat with him, but he ducked off the bus as soon as they stopped, and she had a hard time getting any time alone with him after that. Seemed she’d decided to stop running and maybe he’d decided to start again.

Jackson, Mississippi

I
t was hard
to be in Jackson and not think of Johnny and June Carter Cash singing about it. They’d been on tour for two weeks and so far Emma and Hudson had sort of avoided each other. She finished up in the shower and opened the door to peek out. The smell of bacon and coffee filled the air and she heard the radio playing softly.

The song she didn’t want to write had been playing softly in her mind since they’d left Nashville. She’d kept quiet about it but had jotted down lyrics whenever they struck her.

She scooted out of the bathroom and back to the bedroom that Gramps had given up for her.

“Emma, you decent?” Hudson yelled from the front of the bus.

“Sort of,” she said. Her hair was in a towel and she wore a robe that covered her from neck to knee.

“Whoo-wee, I like your definition of decent,” he said. He’d been all cordial cowboy since that night they’d talked but he’d kept his distance. He rode in his pick-up truck during the day and ate with the roadies when they stopped. According to Tasha he’d been teaching her to ride but whenever she mentioned rehearsing he was busy.

“Sure you do. I’ve never met a man who flirts like you and doesn’t back it up,” she said.

She was irritated mainly at herself but also a little at him. That night in Tennessee and the one in Virginia Beach had felt magical, like they were at the start of something but instead it had fizzled out.
There’s an allegory for her life
.

“I was giving you some space. I could tell the first concert you did sort of freaked you out.”

Yeah, she guessed running away to the midway after the performance and hiding amongst the crowds of fairgoers didn’t make her seem like she was okay. But she’d needed distance and some strength. She wouldn’t have minded if he’d followed her. But he hadn’t.

“Whatever. So what did you need me for?”

“We’ve got five days off after this and Alan wants me to take you to Marietta and teach you to ride.”

Marietta?

“Why?” she asked.

“Because on my ranch it’ll be easier than trying to find a place around here. We’ll meet back up with everyone else in St. Louis.”

“Um…okay, when will we leave? I assume we’re driving,” she said.

“No. We’re going to fly. We’d lose three days if we drove and you need all the time on the horse you can get.”

She nodded. “I need to talk to Gramps and then I’ll get back to you.”

“Do you think he might say something different?” Hudson asked coming closer to her.

“Not at all. Just wondering how he’ll get on without his bodyguard,” she said, smartly.

“I’m sure he’ll be fine. Are you sure you’re just not afraid to be alone with me?” he asked.

“You’re the one who’s been keeping your distance,” she pointed out.

He closed the gap between them and put his hands on her shoulders, pulling her into his arms. “I’m not now.”

Sweet Georgia peaches! She wasn’t sure what she’d expected when she’d thrown out her challenge but having him pull her into his arms hadn’t been it. He lowered his head toward hers and she lifted her hands to his shoulders and went up on tiptoe to meet him.