Here Comes Trouble (18 page)

“It’s time to get back to work before someone else takes your position,” Cassidy said. The one drawback to working at the same company as his sister meant she always knew when he missed work.

“I’m on vacation,” Matthew said. He had plenty of leave saved up. He could stay out for a couple of months if he wanted to. 

“We’re not leaving until you get out of this bed. You can’t hide forever,” Derrick said. “I told you this would happen, didn’t I? I tried to warn you, but I guess there’s no way to really prepare for the unexpected. Love is crazy like that. It hits you when you least expect it.”

“Obviously he can’t handle it,” Cassidy declared. “He’s so whooped he can’t even get out of bed.”

“Come on, Cass. You’re being too hard on him.”

“Well, look at him. He’s a pathetic shell of his former self. I’m embarrassed.”

They were talking as if he couldn’t even hear them.

“He’s never been in love before. It’s hit him hard. You said yourself Lorena’s going through the same thing.”

“Yes, but she’s keeping busy. She’s not hiding out and eating crap all day. Look at all these boxes. Pizza, Chinese, pizza again.”

“Give the man a break,” Derrick said.

“No. You know what, I’m going to encourage Lorena to forget about him because he’s obviously not the right man for her. You know, she mentioned something about Lewis calling her again. Maybe she’ll give him a second chance…”

Matthew sat up, tossing the pillows off of him with such force that two landed on the floor. “Like hell she will,” he growled. He squinted, letting his eyes adjust to the light.

Derrick stood with his back to the window, and Cassidy had her hand braced on his shoulder.

“Told ya,” she said smugly, holding out her palm to Derrick. “Reverse psychology works every time.”

Derrick fished in his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He took out a bill and slapped it in Cassidy’s palm. “You have known him longer.”

“The two of you are evil,” Matthew said.

“I prefer crafty,” Cassidy said with smile.

“All right, you’re crafty, and you’ve made your point. Now get out.”

“Gladly. It stinks in here.”

“I heard you the first time.”

Matthew rubbed a hand across the whiskers on his jaw. He hadn’t shaved in days and hadn’t bothered to check his appearance. He probably looked like a mountain man.

Cassidy watched him with concern in her eyes. “You’re okay, aren’t you?”

He knew she was thinking about the day, years ago, when their lives had changed when they lost their mother.

He smiled reassuringly at her. “Of course. You know me. I’m down, but I’m not out. I needed time to think, that’s all.”

She smiled, relieved. “In that case, a little bird told me Lorena’s working in her office today, but you didn’t hear that from me.”

“Thanks, Cass.”

Derrick followed behind Cassidy, but he stopped at the door. “By the way, I heard about the incident with those two guys. If you ever have any more problems, let me know. I know people who know people.”

Derrick’s stepfather had left him a fortune. With access to that kind of money, Matthew didn’t doubt he knew of a way to make problems disappear.

“I’m good. Lorena’s dad took care of it weeks ago, but I’ll let you know if I have any recurring issues.”

“Bye, Matt,” Cassidy hollered from somewhere down the hall.

“Leave your key,” he hollered back.

“Not a chance.”

Matthew smiled and shook his head. He didn’t know what he’d do without his siblings.

****

Lorena stood in front of the file cabinet in her office, the contents of the drawer staring up at her. She’d forgotten why she’d even opened it. This happened frequently nowadays—this strange lapse in short-term memory. One minute she’d be in the midst of completing a task, the next minute she’d find herself floundering in confusion, unable to recall what she was doing or why.

She slammed the drawer closed and blinked back tears. She removed her glasses and set them on top of the cabinet. All her good intentions of catching up on work had been shot to hell. She couldn’t concentrate any more today than she’d been able to all week. She’d even lost a potential client a few days ago because she’d written the time of their meeting on the wrong date—for the second time.

Dropping her face into her hands, she wondered when the pain would end and when she could get back to being her old self. She was sick with missing him, but there was no cure for this type of ailment.

She realized she wasn’t alone when she heard a faint rustling at the door. She swung around, and the reason for her misery stood framed in the doorway looking as pitifully miserable as she felt. Her heart tripped over itself, but she squared her shoulders and ground an imaginary boot into the wings of joy that sprouted at the sight of him.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, keeping her voice even and cool.

“Can we talk?”

“We said everything we needed to say last week.”

He strode in as if she hadn’t even spoken. He looked good, and smelled good, too. As if he’d just taken a shower and come right over to tempt and torture her.

“Lorena, you never let me explain the other day.”

“I did let you explain. You told me Reshemah is a friend and nothing happened. I heard everything you said.” She only needed to hold it together long enough for him leave, and then she could commence to falling apart.

“You heard me, but you don’t believe me.”

“It’s over. Nothing you say will change my mind. I don’t believe you’ve changed, and I don’t want to be with you. Find someone else’s heart to break. Find someone else to make a fool of.”

She focused on her anger. It would help her get through this latest trial with him. But she saw sadness in his eyes, and it confused her. He looked defeated, and try as she might not to feel anything, her heart went out to him.

“Lorena, I’m not perfect. I’ve done things in my past relationships I’m not proud of, but nothing happened in the hotel in New York. When we first started dating, I admit it, I was scared. You had me thinking about things I’d never considered before—marriage, children. It scared the hell out of me. My parents’ marriage didn’t exactly make for a good template of what a healthy relationship should look like. I didn’t want to fall in love or get married. Certainly not at this young age. I had too much living left to do.” He ran a weary hand down the back of his head, his biceps bulking up under the linen fabric of his shirt. “I have a confession to make. I need to be honest and tell you what happened months ago the first time we were together.”

“No, I don’t want to know.” Lorena backed up. “Please don’t tell me.”

“It’s important. You have to know the truth.” Matthew closed his eyes and hung his head. “I didn’t cheat, but I wanted to. I’m not proud of what I did.” He swallowed and lifted his head. “Reshemah had come to see me once before in Atlanta, before you and I became a couple. We hooked up, and she went on her way. When you and I were together, she called to say she was passing through again. The right thing to do would have been to tell her about you, but I didn’t.”

“I don’t want to hear this.”

“It was right after the night we were lying in bed together and you started talking about us having a future together,” Matthew continued, ignoring her protest. “I panicked. I guess I wanted to feel like my old self, so I told her she could swing by. The minute she showed up, I knew I couldn’t go through with it. I kept looking at her, and all I could think about was you. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, and she didn’t know what was wrong. I actually felt sick to my stomach, if you can believe it. She ended up leaving, and I came to see you.”

Matthew sighed and ran his hand over his face. “I think subconsciously I wanted you to break up with me. I’d never been careless before, and coming to your house smelling of perfume was definitely careless. The reason I even smelled like her perfume was because she hugged me when she came and hugged me again when she left. For no other reason. When we got into the fight, I saw it as my way out, back to normalcy, back to my old self. But after we broke up, I had a…problem I couldn’t get rid of.”

“What problem?”

He heaved a heavy sigh. “I couldn’t get it up.”

Lorena’s eyes widened. “What?”

“Yeah.” A pained expression crossed his features. “Since you and I split, I haven’t been with anyone else. If you repeat this, I’ll deny it till the day I die. I got worried, so I went to see a therapist, for performance issues.”

“You were impotent?” Lorena gasped.

“Whoa, whoa,” Matthew said with a frown. “Nobody said anything about being impotent. Let’s not throw that word around all willy-nilly. The therapist said I had deep feelings for you, and I needed to accept them instead of trying to fight them.”

“I’m shocked.” She suddenly felt more beautiful and sexy than she’d ever felt in her life. The thought that he’d become incapable of having sex with anyone else buoyed her spirits.

“Don’t look so pleased with yourself,” Matthew said dryly.

Lorena straightened her mouth into a serious line, unaware until he commented that she’d been smiling.

“As for Reshemah, she’s not a bad person. I never told her about us until I saw her in New York last week. Once I did, she backed off. She agreed to call you and vouch for my story, but I decided against it. You need to believe me based on my words alone, not anyone else’s.”

His words sounded like music to her ears, but she still felt the need to exercise caution.

“Lorena, I’ve never felt like this about anyone else. I know you had feelings for me long before I did for you, and maybe that’s why it’s harder for you to take the leap. I’m a different person. I’m not the same man I used to be. Nothing happened. You have to believe me.”

He came closer. Her feet remained planted on the carpet, her body immobilized.

“I want to believe you, Matt, I do.”

“I know what you’re doing,” he said. “You’re testing me.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are. But I’m not going anywhere. I’m not giving up. I’m not like Linus. I’m not walking away. I’m not throwing in the towel and forfeiting the game, because I’m miserable without you, and I know you’re miserable without me. You’re just scared.”

“Of course I’m scared. How do I know you won’t be tempted away by one of your sex buddies?”

“Have you been listening to me? My body won’t respond to another woman. I don’t want anyone else but you. And remember, I came back after the knee to the nuts. I hung around even though your ex hired two thugs to try to beat the crap out of me on the side of the road. What do I have to do to prove I’m serious about us?”

He took her hands in his, and warmth spread from her fingers throughout the rest of her body. It felt good to touch him again, his hands holding hers in a firm but gentle clasp.

“I’m not giving up,” he said. “I love you, and that won’t change. You don’t have to believe me, because I’m going to prove it to you. I’ll prove it to you every single day until you accept it and realize I’m not going anywhere ever again, and I’ll never purposely hurt you. I’m going to be at your job, at your house, at your parents’ house. You can’t get rid of me, Lorena. You love me, and I love you, and I’m not giving up on us.”

“Matt—”

“You can do whatever you want,” he continued, cutting her off. “You can throw me out, you can not see me, not take my calls, and you know what I’m going to do? I’m going to keep showing up. I’m going to keep calling. I’m going to prove to you I’ve changed. That I’m a good man. That I do love you.” His voice thickened, and she started to tremble, overcome by emotion. “Get ready. I’m going to wear you down. I’m sending you flowers, jewelry, chocolates—whatever I have to send you to make you happy, and I’m not stopping until you believe I love you. I’m not stopping until you trust me again. I’m not stopping until you can’t help yourself, and you come to me, and you curl up in my lap and purr like a little kitten.”