Hers to Choose (Cannon Cousins) (35 page)

His face was set in rigid
lines. “Dan.”

Blood drained out of her
head. “Dan...” she asked in a hoarse voice, swallowing. “Dan?”

He poured some whiskey.
“Yes, Dan. It started out being about Dan, right? Later, when I thought about
it, it seemed so unfair to you, to anyone, really.” He shook his head. “You
were here by yourself, you needed money,
we
took
advantage of you. What the hell choice did you have?” His hands clenched into
fists. “I’m
sorry,
I shouldn’t be talking like this,
not after what you’ve been through today.”

Her ears surely weren’t
hearing what it seemed like they were hearing. As if she had been powerless in
the situation, had not made the choice, had not gained any pleasure.

“Alex, you and
Dan, that
was nothing like today. I didn’t feel forced. I
could have said ‘no’ and I knew you would have respected that. I thought you knew
it was what I wanted. I thought I made it clear—those were my fantasies, what I
asked for. One of the most exciting things I’ve ever done in my life—two
incredible men, I mean, my god, Alex. Yes, I seriously wanted both of you at
the same time.”

His jaw pulsed. “I could
see that, finally, recently. I think I’m a little closer to getting it about
your kink thing. I hated Dan for what he was doing to you, and couldn’t believe
you actually enjoyed it. I thought if I could make love to you, you’d want me, but
you didn’t, you only wanted Dan. And it was this dominance thing he could do,
that I couldn’t do.
Right?”

“No.” Tears began rolling
down her face and she felt desperate. “Damn it, Alex, you’re breaking my heart.
I wanted you from the first minute I heard your voice on the phone. But you
kept deferring to Dan. So of course it was about Dan. You made it about Dan.
Yes, okay, I enjoyed the thing between me and Dan. But more than that, I wanted
any diversion to keep me from falling in love with you.

“But, damn it, Alex,
nothing helped. I fell in love with you anyway. But I couldn’t tell you. Hell,
I couldn’t tell myself. Honestly, it wasn’t just because I thought you had
someone. After Ethan, I promised myself not to get lost in another man. I
thought I was being weak. But I couldn’t stop myself. What I felt for you—what
I feel—is completely different from what I feel—felt—for Dan.”

“Bryn,” he said, taking
her arm, his eyes burning cobalt. “Don’t kid around about this. It’s too important.
Is that true? It wasn’t Dan? Not the damn spanking and being tied up? You
dressed up for him like he was the special one, remember? Didn’t he come down
here in January and have you again? What in hell am I supposed to think, that
you didn’t want Dan? How could you not know how much I wanted you? Didn’t you
see I couldn’t control myself? I was always yours to choose.”

She couldn’t think of
what to say. “I love you, Alex.
Only you.”

His eyes blazed. “Bryn, I
can’t take it if you tell me you want me and then change your mind.” His voice
grated hoarsely.

Tears ran down her face.
“
Ahhh
!” she sobbed.
“Alex, oh my
god.”
The reality, the truth, formed fully in her mind. She didn’t have
to give up anything to love Alex. He made her stronger.

“I chose you from the
beginning. But I couldn’t tell you. Hell, I couldn’t tell myself,” she said in
a quiet voice. “I didn’t want to need a man. So I kept pushing away what I
felt. I convinced myself you didn’t care. I thought you came to me that last
night because I asked, like I was a charity case.” She shuddered through a sob.
“But Alex, I couldn’t stop what I was feeling for you. I hated myself for being
stupid, again, for a man.”

“Bryn…” His voice broke
and he shook his head. His arms came around her, holding her tight. She let
herself dissolve into more crying. Her sadness, fear, anger, all of it poured
out as he caressed her hair, murmuring.

“I’m crazy about you,
Bryn Electra McClure.
Head over heels.
Sick with it.”

“God, Alex, I can’t
believe it.”

“It’s true. Believe it.”
He held her until her sobs subsided. “Now, put me to work helping with dinner,”
he said, rolling his shirt sleeves. “I’m starving.”

***

Broth bubbling with the aroma of sage,
celery and chicken permeated the air. A pan of greens sat ready to heat.
Periodically she looked up as he worked at pulling chicken meat off the bone,
her fork idle in the dumpling mix of flour and shortening as she tried to
comprehend this new state of their relationship. He caught her look and smiled.
They came together as if drawn by magnetic force, kissing, muttering silly
words, before turning back to dinner preparations.

“Dump the meat into the
broth,” she said.

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied.

He stood by the stove as
she dropped
spoonfuls
of dumpling dough onto the
meat. His scent came to her nose. She looked up into those blue eyes, freshly
shaken by the day’s events.

“That was my favorite
crayon,” she said, touching his cheekbone with her fingertips. She could love
him, hold him,
let
him into her heart.
“Cobalt.”

“What?”

His hands on her arms
sent shock waves through her system, bottoming and echoing through her lower
belly. Her gaze locked on his mouth, those sensual lips hovering inches away.

“Your
eyes.
Cobalt.
Like the deepest blue of the sky. I used it up
before any of the other colors.”

“Bryn,” he laughed. “I
love you.”

She put her fingertip on
his lips, soft, warm. She leaned up and put her lips against his, gently
brushing from side to side. Her breasts pressed against his chest, his wide
brawny chest in his wrinkled dress shirt, its neck open and exposing the rugged
lines of his neck and throat.

His lips pressed back,
moving and sliding against her mouth. His hands held her arms, gripping and
pulling her against him. His chest heaved. A groan rumbled in his throat.

She ran her hands down
his arms, thrilling at the feel of his skin.

His mouth moved to her
cheeks, her eyes,
her
neck. “I thought I knew what was
going on with you, but obviously, I didn’t.”

“I didn’t realize…” she
began. “When you came down here, it tormented me to see how worn out you
looked. I wanted to hold you in my
arms,
take care of
you, feed you. Are you telling me I can do that now?
Because
I don’t ever want to let you go.”

His blue eyes had become
avenues into the depths of him. She saw him then, the truth of what he was
saying.

“Yes, Bryn, I’m telling
you, I’m asking you, please don’t let me go. I won’t treat you like Ethan did.
I promise on my life.”

***

After dinner, Alex insisted on taking
care of the dishes. They cuddled on the couch and watched television. Bryn had
no idea what shows they watched. Her entire attention focused on Alex. She knew
he wanted her, but he insisted they keep that for tomorrow. Her head ached
slightly, which he said probably resulted from the drug, and she settled into a
content relaxation in his arms.
Later, as he lay beside her
in bed with his arms laced around her, tears of happiness pooled in her eyes.

The next morning, eager
to see the construction progress, he hiked with her along the road to the new,
white-graveled drive where it stretched down the slope into the land. He
commented on everything, exuberant and worried in turn. A considerable time
passed while he stood at the septic assembly studying its various components
before he declared it ‘good.’ Then he hurried back to the house site and rushed
around the stakes he had set two months before, revisiting his concept of where
the porches would look out, how the roofline would intersect with the tree
line, uttering an endless array of muttered phrases and half-finished questions
that he didn’t expect her to answer.

She watched him move
around the land, picking at bent limbs and adjusting out of place rocks, and
decided he had to be the most wonderful man she had ever known. Everything had
happened so fast, she
kept having
to remind herself he
loved her. He said he loved her! Even more stunning, something inside her had
opened so she could let the love in. She didn’t have to be alone. She couldn’t
get the stupid grin off her face.

“Come along, Miss
McClure,” he said, striding up beside her and taking her by the elbow. “We have
very important business to discuss.”

“What?” She tried to
think if she’d failed to carry out some task. “Is something wrong?”

He frowned from under the
brim of his crumpled Aussie hat. “Terribly wrong, I’m afraid.”

“But…”

“Hurry up,” he said,
hiking so fast along the road that she had to trot to keep up. “Alex?”

He rushed her across the
porch and into the house. Out of breath, she started to explain. “I called the
county sanitation people, if that’s what you’re upset about. They said they’d
come inspect, but I didn’t try to make an appointment…”

“That’s not it,” he said,
standing close with a dark look in his eyes. “This is even more serious than
the sanitation people. It’s critical. Life and death stuff, Bryn Electra
McClure.”

As he talked, the buttons
on her shirt slipped one by one under his fingers, then her tank top came over
her head and the bra hit the floor. His mouth and hands owned her breasts,
teasing and stroking and lavishing the flesh until her nipples throbbed and her
breasts swelled with heat.

A quiet laugh rippled in
her throat.

“You had me scared,” she
whispered.

“Be scared,” he said in a
threatening voice. “Be very scared.”

He swung her into his arms and
carried her to the bedroom, where the sheets were still rumpled from their
night’s sleep.

He stood her down,
fastening her in an intense stare.

“Undress,” he demanded.

Her jaw dropped slightly
as he stood, feet spread slightly, with his arms crossed. A nervous gasp
escaped as she bent to remove her shoes then shimmy out of her jeans and
panties. His stern demeanor shocked and thrilled her. With his tousled hair
crowned by the morning light, his jaw cut a shadowed line to his strong chin.
Her eyes fluttered briefly as she stood naked before him. She could barely
breathe.

“Turn around,” he
commanded.

Her glance darted from
his intense stare to the tie he held in his hands.

“Now.”

“Yes, s-s-sir,” she
stammered. Her arousal had to be conspicuous; her nipples had formed rock-hard
points. Wet heat pooled between her thighs as his strong hands pulled her
wrists together behind her and fastened them in silk bonds.

He sat on the side of the
bed and pulled her over his lap. Her breasts slid past his heavy thigh. His
muscles tensed as her weight settled, his legs spread slightly to balance her.

His left hand held her hair
while his hand rested lightly on her buttocks, sending jolts of electricity
through her belly. “I expect you to be compliant, Miss McClure.”

Slap!
He hit her left buttock square in
the center.

Slap!
Her right buttock shook with the force
of his hand. Heat spread over the fleshy mounds.

Slap!
Slap!
His hand centered at
the bottom curve of her ass, across the sensitive area so near her vulva.

Oh, god, whatever he
intended, her body had flashed to white heat by the time the fourth slap
scorched her butt. More cream oozed between her legs.

Slap! Slap! Slap!

His breath heaved in
short hard bursts as he spanked her. With each blow, her swollen breasts rocked
against his thigh. Her bare butt glowed, and the fire spread down her thighs
and up her chest. Her rigid clit throbbed, itching in need.

Slap! Slap! Slap!

“
Ohh
.”
Her pleasure spilled out, coaxed from her throat as his
scent swelled to fill her nose. “Yes, Alex,
yes
!” she groaned between
clenched teeth.

“Kneel,” he commanded in
a rough voice, sliding her off his lap. He stood up, unfastened his pants, and
released his massive erection.

Her tongue slid over her
lips as she looked at the smooth darkened head with its wide flared crown.
Laced with bulging veins, its straining length angled toward her.

She could hardly contain
her pleasure, brushing her nipples against his legs as she gained position.
With the tip of her tongue and her lips, she kissed the hot skin of his groin
and lower abdomen, nibbling and nipping over his upper thighs before licking
his testicles where they clumped in the apex of his legs. Finally she brought
her mouth to his pulsing cock, sliding her tongue up and down its length before
capturing it in her mouth and driving him straight to the back of her throat.