High Lonesome (13 page)

Beth laid her hand on his arm to stop his rant. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I thought you’d want to know what I’m remembering.”

“I do. I’m glad you told me.”

She nodded, looking relieved. “What do you think this means? Doctor Coleman said I might not be able to differentiate between what’s real and what could be random thoughts or hallucinations. I’m confused. I hope I don’t have an abusive husband. I’d be so ashamed to find out I’ve been living with a violent man and subjecting a child to that sort of environment. I couldn’t forgive myself.”

Scott lowered his head and started walking again. She didn’t seem like the kind of woman who would be with a man who abused her. But he knew some women became trapped in domestic abuse with no way out. She fell back in step with him. “Have you been able to decipher this creep’s face yet?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Maybe I just don’t want to see it. I know he’s tall and muscular, and physically strong. When I experience a flashback, I can almost feel his powerful grip on my arms. His eyes are wild—they look out of control. That’s the best description I can give so far.”

“Let’s not jump to conclusions about any of it. Let’s think this through,” Scott suggested. She was living the terror of the flashbacks. Strong emotions could lead to irrational thoughts. He had to be the voice of reason in order to help her. They walked without speaking for several yards, each lost in their own thoughts, when a piercing scream punctured the air. It came from the far arena.

“Come on!” Scott punched his hat down and took off running, with Beth following close on his heels. When they reached the arena, five of the six High Lonesome house guests were gathered in a circle. “What’s going on?” Scott stepped into the group and raked his gaze over all of them. “Is someone hurt?” His pulse pounded through his temples.

Cody knelt in the dirt, examining the bloody knee of one of the female guests. The knee of her jeans was ripped and tears streamed down her dust-soaked face.

“Diablo kicked her, boss,” Cody replied. “She has a pretty nasty gash. Rowdy went to get the four-wheeler so we can transport her to headquarters.”

Scott clapped him on the back and then addressed the injured woman. “Marilynne, we’re going to take you to town to see a doctor. How are you feeling? You look a little peaked.”

“I think I might faint,” she replied in a weak voice.

“I’ll get her some water,” Beth offered. She jogged into the barn and fetched a bottle of water from the cooler in the corner. Apparently, she’d remembered seeing the cooler the day Scott gave her the tour.

After twisting off the cap, she handed it to a man who had his palm on Marilynne’s back.

He tipped the bottle into Marilynne’s mouth. “Hang in there, honey. Help’s on the way.”

Rowdy drove in on the four-wheeler. “Hey, boss. I just called Doc Coleman’s office. They said to bring her on in.”

“Thanks.” Scott and Cody helped Marilynne to her feet. She slung her arms around their necks, and they placed their hands under her legs and lifted her into the four-wheeler. Her husband jumped in the back. The other guests waved and called out good wishes as Rowdy drove up the hill.

Out of the corner of his eye, Scott watched as Beth stepped inside the barn. She didn’t look right. “Cody, finish what you were doing with these folks before the accident. We’ll let everyone know how Marilynne is later today. You handled that emergency well.”

“Thanks, Scott.”

The group disbursed and Scott strode to the barn. Beth sat on a wooden stool with her eyes closed and her forehead in her palms.

“Another flashback?” he asked, quietly, kneeling at her side.

“Yes. My head began to throb when I saw Marilynne on the ground.” She narrated the flashback as if she were speaking of a scene in a movie. “He’s twisting my arm. His eyes are bulging with rage. He’s slapping me across the face. He’s giving me a hard push. I’m flying across the room and into a wall.” She pressed her lips together and bit back a scream.

Scott stood and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, wishing he could reach into her mind and punch the guy in the face.

A moan slipped from her mouth as if coming from a wounded animal. Her entire body trembled under his touch. “Is it over yet?” he asked.

She nodded and lifted her head.

He gently brushed loose tendrils of hair out of her face. “Are you all right?”

“Yes. Seeing Marilynne in pain must have triggered it. I’m getting closer to the truth, Scott. I can feel it. And it makes me more afraid than ever.”

“You said he pushed you into a wall. I take it you still don’t know how you ended up in the desert.”

“That’s right.”

“Could you see the man’s face this time?”

“No. Why can’t I see
him
, when I can see the little girl so clearly?” Tears sprang to her eyes.

“You’re probably blocking him out because the whole thing is so frightening. You don’t want to remember him. I wonder if it would help for you to see a counselor, or a psychologist or a hypnotist.”

Her eyes stung with tears. “Do you think I’m crazy?”

“No! Of course not. I’m worried about you. I just want to help. I don’t know what to do. I feel powerless. It’s just like when Maggie died in my arms.”

They looked at each other for a long moment, and then she wiped her damp eyes with her shirtsleeve. “I’m sorry, Scott. I’m being selfish. I apologize for bringing up painful memories.”

“I didn’t mean anything by my comment. There’s no need to apologize. This isn’t about me.”

She stood up on wobbling legs. “Is your guest going to be okay?”

“Yeah. Rowdy’s taking her to town. Joanna will stitch her up and Marilynne will be back on the trail within the hour. They always are.”

She smiled. “In other words, she’ll cowgirl up.”

“That’s right. But what you’re going through is more complicated. You don’t have to cowgirl up right now.”

Beth inhaled a deep breath. “We’d better go get Willow. She’s going to wonder what happened to us.”

“If you’re sure you’re okay,” Scott said.

“I’m fine.”

On their way to the other side of the barn, Scott placed his hand on the back of her neck. “Everything’s going to be all right,” he told her. She shivered under his fingertips grazing her neck and then made a slight, but noticeable, movement to step away. Did the touch of any man scare her? Or was Beth trying to send him a message, a reminder that he was taken? After this last flashback, there seemed to be no doubt that she had a man in her life, too.

****

During lunch, Willow kept them in stitches with a series of knock-knock jokes. It wasn’t so much that they were laugh out loud funny, it was her delivery. She made such goofy faces and heehawed at her own jokes. Once the giggles started in Beth, she couldn’t stop, and the trickle effect took place. Scott and Carmen laughed so hard, tears streamed down their cheeks.

It felt good to release all that pent-up emotion. With the flashbacks coming with more frequency and clarity, Beth needed a distraction more than ever.

“I have an announcement to make,” Scott said, pushing his plate back.

“Oh, goodie. What is it, Daddy?”

“Willow, how would you and Beth like to go to a fancy party with me tonight?”

Beth tossed him a surprised look.

“Yes!” Willow screamed, clapping her hands. She jumped off her stool and started to dance around the kitchen, clogging in her pink cowgirl boots. “Where are we going, Daddy?”

“There’s a ribbon cutting ceremony being held at the hospital to celebrate the dedication of the new wing.”

Willow stopped dancing and sighed. “That sounds boring. I thought you said it was a party.”

“Well, they’re going to be serving hors d’oeuvres.”

“What are those?”

“Tiny sandwiches you eat with your pinkie finger sticking up.”

Willow giggled and stuck her pinkie in the air. “What else will they have?”

“Miniature cakes and baby pickles and weird cheesy things wrapped in bacon.”

“I love bacon.” Willow mulled over the possibilities. “Will there be dancing and singing? Will the Four Fiddlers be playing?”

Carmen chuckled. Beth raised her eyebrow, and Scott explained. “They’re a local bluegrass band. For some odd reason, Willow loves them. They play at all the rodeos. I don’t think the fiddlers will be at this event, honey,” he informed his daughter.

“Rats!”

“The best part is,” Scott continued, “you can dress up real pretty and be a little lady for once. Wouldn’t you like that?”

She pondered the idea. “I guess. Beth, are you going? If you go, I’ll go.”

Beth’s answer was honest. “I don’t have anything to wear to a fancy shindig, but I know you’ll have fun with your daddy.”

Carmen began to clear the dishes. “There are several party dresses upstairs in the closet,” she said. “I’m sure you’ll find at least one to suit you.” She looked to Scott for confirmation.

He nodded. “You’re welcome to any of them, Beth, but I think you deserve a new party dress. What do you think, Willow?”

“Yes! Let’s go shopping!”

“No,” Beth declared with a firm shake of her head. “You’re not going to buy me anything else. You’ve already done enough for me. But thanks for the offer,” she added, with appreciation.

She had her doubts as to whether Scott approved of her continuing to wear Maggie’s clothes, particularly a party dress. She could see how a pretty dress his wife wore might conjure up memories that brought sadness or pain. She was determined, however, not to be more indebted to him than she already was. “I’ve been feeling a little tired today,” she offered as an excuse. “It sounds fun, but I think I’ll bow out. You can make it a father-daughter date.”

Both father and daughter’s faces faded. “You
have
to go,” Willow groaned.

Beth and Scott’s gazes locked on each other. “Beth,” he said in his soft, sexy drawl, “you are more than welcome to wear any of Maggie’s dresses, or I’ll buy you something brand new, if you’d feel more comfortable. You choose. I’ll do whatever you want. You can wear a feed sack for all I care. I just want you to go tonight. It would do us all good to dress up and get out.”

Willow rolled her eyes and laughed. “A feed sack? Daddy, that would look stupid.”

Beth grinned.

Scott did, too. “I agree, but I think I made my point. Right?” He looked to Beth.

“Right. You made your point,” she acknowledged. “Thank you for the invitation. I’ll go.”

His mouth split into a broad grin and Willow hopped up and down like a jackrabbit. “Beth, can you help me pick out an outfit and fix my hair?” she begged. The little girl’s blue eyes twinkled with anticipation.

Beth took hold of her small hands. “I’d be glad to, honey.”

Willow flung herself into Beth’s arms and squeezed her middle. When Beth looked into Scott’s rugged face, the look of a contented man greeted her.

“Can we pick out my outfit now?” Willow asked with excitement.

“You have plenty of time, sweetheart. The party’s not for hours,” Scott said.

“Oh, okay. I’m going out to brush Midnight then.” She skipped out of the kitchen, humming.

“Carmen will holler when it’s time to come in and wash up,” he called out the door as she ran down the sidewalk. He turned to Beth. “I appreciate you agreeing to help her get ready. I think you can see how much it means to her.”

“I’m happy to.”

He slid a hand through his blond locks. “Before the day gets away, I need to go to town and get a haircut. Doctor’s orders. I’ve been told it’s too long and shaggy for a fancy shindig.”

“Really? I like your hair the way it is,” Beth said.

“You do?” His eyebrow arched. “Thanks. I do, too. It’s the no-fuss cowboy style.”

“I guess a little trim wouldn’t hurt,” she added, turning him by the shoulder and checking out the length of his hair. “I’d be glad to do that for you. It would save you a trip to town.”

“That would be great. Do you have time right now?” He jumped on the idea. Perhaps he was afraid she’d change her mind or get busy later.

It was wrong, but the anticipation of running her hands across his scalp and skin made her feel weak. “Sure. I have nothing pressing on my social calendar at the moment,” she teased.

Carmen shooed them out of the kitchen with a broom. “You two go onto the porch and do that. I already swept up in here. He needs a shave, too, Beth.”

“He does? I thought the five o’clock shadow was his style, but I can certainly oblige, if a shave is what he wants.”

Scott rubbed a hand across his stubbly cheeks and chin, smiling at her jest.

“I’ll gather up the barbering equipment and bring them out,” Carmen told them.

“You have barbering equipment?”

“What Carmen means is she’ll give you a comb and scissors,” Scott replied. He escorted Beth to the front of the house and swung the screen door open, holding it for her. “We can sit in the rockers and enjoy the view while waiting for Carmen.”

She slid onto the rocker seat and sighed. The sun shone high in the azure sky like a gleaming ball of gold. “This is such a beautiful ranch. The view from here reminds me of a picture postcard. The red sandstone mountains are as pretty as any anything I’ve ever seen.”

Scott’s chair squeaked as he rocked back and forth. “Growing up here, I’ve sometimes taken the beauty for granted. But since you’ve been with us, I’ve been seeing New Mexico through your eyes. This
is
a beautiful place, and I’m very proud to be the owner of such a fine ranch.”

“Here you go.” Carmen pushed the screen door open with her hip and unloaded the barbering tools onto a small drink table. “Make him look real handsome,” she told Beth, before disappearing back into the house.

Scott retrieved a straight-backed chair from the foyer, carried it out to the porch and sat down with his legs spread wide. Beth stood at his broad shoulders and removed his hat. He sucked in a deep breath and tried to still his thudding heart as her fingers began to dance across his scalp.

“Your hair is thick,” she noted while fluffing it.

He answered with a low “Uh-huh.”

She folded a towel around his neck and tucked it into his shirt collar.