Authors: Ani Alexander
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It was one of those nights for going out. Annika was already feeling horny and knowing what was going to happen, was dressing up for sex. It is strange how the same actions when love and feelings are involved can differ so much from when there is nothing like that. The pure physical act is less complicated. Annika did not care what a stranger thought about her or how he would feel afterwards. It was all about herself – her desires, needs and pleasures. Nothing more, nothing less.
Annika stood in front of the mirror and watched herself in the new lace lingerie she had bought to feel sexy. The bra hugged her breasts perfectly and the panties accentuated exactly where most attention should be paid. High heels enhanced her slender long legs. With her lingerie, hosiery and high heels, she could be featuring on the cover of Maxim.
The second stage was to apply her makeup. For these occasions Annika made up heavily.
Black eyeliner gave a smoky eyes effect and lip gloss made her lips look full and appetising. Like most women she opened her mouth slightly while putting on mascara, which made her eyes look bigger. Then she took the perfume and applied it to the most unexpected parts of her body.
When all was done, she looked quite the vamp – self-confident, extremely attractive and sexy. In other words, she did not look like herself. If Stefan or Vasko had seen her, and those were the men who had had her in their beds, they would definitely not believe their eyes.
The last and most difficult part was what to wear. Her wardrobe did not offer a wide choice and since she did not shop for clothes, and especially not for occasional sexual encounters, the choice was even smaller. She picked out a skimpy black dress with a plunging neckline and slipped it on. Then she put her hair up to show off her neck and put on long, pendant earrings.
She was just about ready when one of her friends called to give her a lift as arranged, and out they went. Today was a girls’ night out, and the four of them were determined to have a good, steamy time.
Annika's friends were single, two of them in fact divorced. They were all lonely and thus not that happy with their lot. Nights like these helped them to relax, forget their personal problems and unwind. Maybe it did not show them in the most ethical or moral light, but the four of them were pretty decent. They’d simply been hurt too badly, and were too smart to jump into yet another relationship after having been burned more than once before.
By the time they got there, the club was almost packed.
“Remember girls? We keep hold of our beer bottles or cocktail glasses and if we let go of them, we order new ones.”
Annika was the most cautious of the four. She trusted no-one and made sure they didn't get into messy situations. Cases of people surreptitiously slipping a drug into a girl's drink and taking advantage of them afterwards were quite common. Not that they had not come there for sex, but still they did not need the “drug” part and they wanted to make their choices themselves rather than be chosen.
After a bottle of beer Annika decided to hit the dance floor. She loved the fact that in clubs she could dissolve in music, close her eyes and forget everything. Her body followed the beat and she felt easy and light. It was a night to forget all her problems, worry about nothing and have a good time with a nice-looking guy. Next morning it would all be gone and she would wake up to reality... but not yet, baby ... not yet!
Annika was dancing with her eyes closed. Suddenly she felt two hands touching her and a masculine body dancing very close to hers. The hands were hungry, while her body was hungry for them. She didn’t want to open her eyes; she didn’t want to see whose hands they were. It didn’t matter. So she started dancing with the body which had no image of a face for her yet. Her eyes were closed and she saw only darkness and she felt only the body getting closer and closer to hers. No one could ever understand how she could act like that. To be honest she never understood it either. Maybe it was because she was too lonely or too young to be without sex for long, or maybe both.
The guy’s hands were bold and tender at the same time. The warmth was spreading inside her body. She opened her eyes and liked what she saw. He was a young guy, almost a head higher than her - even with those high heels. He had very nice curly black hair and extremely attractive blue eyes. One more glance at his body and she was completely won over. If Annika were honest with herself, then this guy looked much better and sexier than either Vasko or Stefan. That is if one judged objectively and took into consideration only the physical characteristics, of course.
“What’s your name?” the guy shouted in her ear so she could hear through the loud music.
“Monica,” Annika answered. Somehow on nights like this, when she was acting like a slut, Monica's name always came to her mind. And since she would never tell anyone her real name, her bitchy ex-girlfriend's name was the one she used.
“I'm Greg,” the guy answered with the sexiest smile she had ever seen.
She smiled back and hugged him tight. Greg took it as invitation and started kissing her neck. Annika never understood what turned her on so fast. Was it the fact that she had had no sex for weeks, or the fact that she was doing it with a stranger or maybe the fact that at her age hormones were dictating their own rules. The reason was not clear, but that she was getting wet and enjoying every single kiss was absolutely indisputable.
For her nothing existed at that moment. It was only the music, Greg and her spinning head. When Greg moved his head closer and gently kissed her lips, she felt her knees go weak. She pushed her tongue into his mouth and gave him a master-class in the art of well-practised French kissing.
Greg took her hand and led her away from the dance floor. Annika followed him, no questions asked. Never before had she been so attracted to a stranger. Greg took her to the darkest corner of the lounge and pushed her back against the wall. “Hmmmm, it seems he knows this place well and it is not the first time he has done this,” Annika thought with a wicked smile.
Annika's body was pressed between the wall and Greg. She liked feeling almost helpless, with her legs feeling weak above her high heels and Greg's strong hands moving all over her body. His mouth was hungry and his tongue urgent. Annika loved his taste. It was a mixture of cigarette and mint chewing gum. She could feel his hard-on through his jeans and it turned her on even more.
“My case is obvious. What about you? Do you want me?” The words reached her ear.
“Why don't you check it out yourself?” Annika shouted back, looking deep into his eyes, bringing a horny smile to her lips.
Greg raised his eyebrow and then moving closer made sure that his body was completely covering hers so no one could see. Then looking straight into her eyes he accepted the challenge and moved his hand below her short dress. Greg's hand knew its way only too well. He moved up Annika's leg and stopped when he was almost there. Annika's breath stopped. Then, still continuing looking into her eyes, his fingers moved her panties away and reached the soft, wet skin of her clit. Playing a bit with it he continued moving further.
From the way Annika arched her back, closed her eyes and half-opened her mouth, he understood that she had sighed, although he could not hear it through the loud music. Annika could not believe her reactions. She had never felt such animal attraction to anyone before, or at least, to anyone she did not love. Right then, she completely forgot about the friends she’d come with, about the time and the place and about everything else. She simply did not care. All she wanted was to be touched, kissed and fucked by this guy. Maybe Stefan felt the same about heroin, she thought.
Greg's voice brought her back to reality.
“Next time you masturbate, promise you will think of me and my fingers,” said he, pushing his two fingers inside her.
Annika had already lost control. She felt weak and happy at the same time.
Greg pulled his fingers away and licked them.
“Shall we go?” he asked.
“I thought you would never ask,” she shouted back at his ear.
Greg could not take it any more; he grabbed her hand and led her towards the exit.
The cool, fresh air hit Annika's face and partly brought her to her senses.
“Here is my car,” Greg pointed to the tiny blue Mini Cooper parked on the other side of the street.
When they sat in the car and Greg started the engine, he asked:
“Your place or mine?”
“I live with a room-mate. So I guess yours - if you live alone, that is.” Now after Annika had cooled down, she recalled her rule of not taking any of these guys back to her place.
“Ok.”
There was something extremely attractive about this guy and Annika could not take her hands off him. While Greg was driving she unzipped his trousers and caressed his cock, which to her astonishment was fully erect. When she set it free and looked at it, the naughty mood came over her. Without thinking too much she leaned down and took it in her mouth. Greg did not expect anything like that. He was facing a dilemma: should he stop and end up making out in the tiny car, risking painful bumps and blue marks at the end, apart from the inconvenient body positions, or continue driving in order to get home fast, and risk crashing the car meanwhile. Before he could decide, Annika raised her face and said:
“Floor that accelerator, I can't wait too long.”
In less than four minutes, Greg was already opening his apartment door.
25
Vasko had no particular plan in place. He packed a few clothes and left for the airport. Only after the plane took off did it occur to him that Annika might already have someone else there. Their e-mails had been quite general and they did not know too much about each other’s personal lives latterly. With each day they shared less, and only now did Vasko realise that he knew nothing about her friends or lifestyle. She mostly wrote about her work and the books she was reading.
Vasko wanted the plane to fly faster. No longer could he bear their separation. He did not know how he was going to pull it off, but he had to get back what they had had. Vasko had passed all his exams and his graduation was in a week’s time. From then on, his future depended on how Annika would react. They had not seen each other for an entire year but he still recalled her smell, how her skin felt and her taste.
Finally he was there. The taxi was taking him to her place and he was looking around with an amazed face. It was so different from anywhere he had been so far. Now he could understand why Annika liked this city. It was so much like her – unpredictable, crazy and full of contrast. At the same time the city was cosy, welcoming and diverse. Vasko realised that with his calm, shy and quiet character, he would never be able to live here. The thought made him sad. Most probably Annika would not like to give up the city for someone who had once before given up on her. He felt extremely insecure.
The taxi pulled up next to the entrance to her building. Vasko picked up his small suitcase, paid and got out. He took a sharp deep breath. It was still only four in the afternoon, which meant that he would have at least two hours to wait until she got back from work. That is, if she did not go anywhere else. Only then did Vasko realise that he had absolutely no clue about what her days were like.
Full of thoughts, emotional pressure and confusion, he sat down on the steps to the entrance and waited. Vasko had not the faintest idea what he was going to do when he saw her. How could he have forgotten to buy flowers? Stupid, stupid... how dumb could he be!
Vasko sat and watched the passers-by. They, on the other hand, paid him not the slightest attention. A modest guy sitting on some steps: a completely uninteresting sight for Amsterdam.
That day Annika had joined her colleagues for a drink after work. They’d spent a few hours drinking, relaxing and telling stories. It was a nice evening and there was nothing to indicate that anything out of the ordinary would happen.
It was around 10 pm when they all parted. Each went home. The pub was not too far, so Annika walked home alone. Strange to say, given the city's reputation, Annika always felt safe there. She did not feel any danger and was very comfortable walking alone in the dark.
As Annika got close to her building’s entrance, she noticed someone sleeping on the steps. That did not worry her at all. There were many possible explanations – homeless, drugged, drunk...anyone could be sleeping there. She just needed to be careful not to wake him up, open the entrance door with her key and sneak inside: that was all.
The sound of a key opening a door woke Vasko up. At first he did not understand where he was or what was happening. He had lost all sense of time and space. Then he saw Annika and immediately stood up. Annika turned towards him with fear in her eyes. She hoped that she wasn’t going to have to confront a stranger on the empty street at this hour. Who could say who or what the guy might be?
“Hi, Annika!”
She still could not see his face under the cap Vasko was wearing, and was startled to hear her name.
“Hi,” she murmured.
“Oh, it's me,” Vasko took off the cap and looked straight into her eyes.
“Vasko!” Annika threw her arms round his neck and hugged him tight. It felt so nice to see someone familiar and close to her soul. Only now did she actually realise how lonely she’d been without him.
Vasko was overjoyed to see that he was welcome and that his fear of finding Annika living with someone else was groundless. He smiled to himself to think how stupid he had been, both for entertaining such ludicrous thoughts and for not buying any flowers.
Annika finally made her way back to the door again, and opened it. But something in her mind was bothering her. Although she was extremely glad to see Vasko, it felt more like meeting an old friend or a brother. The passion seemed no longer to be there. With time and distance, something had disappeared …but she couldn’t quite identify precisely what it was. It all seemed so perfect, but only almost so. Everything seemed to be ok, but not quite. Annika could not put her finger on anything in particular, but something important was missing.
She climbed the stairs and Vasko followed. Annika unlocked the door to her room and they went inside.
Vasko had no doubt that this was her room. It reflected Annika's personality. Everything there was so much like her- the bright colours, the soft textures and the positive feelings of comfort and warmth. He recalled how nice their rented apartment had been when they lived together. He still could not believe he’d given it all up. But then again, it was easy to think that way now that everything was past, and his finance degree completed.
Vasko felt a pang in his heart when, looking around, he realised that there was absolutely no hint of his existence in the room. None of their photos together, none of his photos, none of his presents to her... nothing to prove that he had ever been in her life. That hurt. It hurt really badly, but he knew that what Annika had done was justified. It was a reasonable choice to leave memories behind and carry on. Vasko, on the other hand, had not managed to do the same. Maybe it was because he felt guilty about how things had turned out and she did not. Maybe because he really was guilty and she still thought so too.
There was tension in the air. Annika put the kettle on to boil and its dull hiss was the only sound in the room. Neither knew what to say and both felt uncomfortable. Vasko had had many hours on the plane to prepare himself for the meeting and collect his thoughts, but he hadn’t done so. Besides, falling asleep on the steps had thrown him completely out of kilter.
Annika, on the other hand, was more concerned about her feelings than the silence. She tried to concentrate on how she felt about his arrival. Was she happy, annoyed or indifferent? Her soul was silent, her heart did not respond and Annika had no idea why.
Annika's bitterness and Vasko's worries filled the air and both tried to cope with the situation. It all resulted in a twenty-minute tea ceremony while they both looked into each other’s eyes in complete silence.