Highland Love Song (DeWinter's Song 2) (29 page)

She was quiet for a moment, and when she spoke her voice came out in a whisper. "Sometimes, Warrick, we are guided by Providence, and we have little control where our lives will take us. I still have doubts about you. But it took a lot of courage for you to come here today, and I admire that."

It was painful being so near her and feeling as if he had no right to touch her. "I hope I never give you cause to regret your decision today."

She laced her fingers together and stared at the distant lights of Edinburgh. She knew he would be leaving soon, and she didn't want to be parted from him. "Are you sure you won't reconsider sailing with us on the
Nightingale
?"

"I must decline. But tell me, why is the ship called the
Nightingale
?" he asked, wanting to delay his departure.

"That is a secret shared only by my mother and father. It's something personal between them that they don't seem inclined to share with anyone, not even Michael and me."

"I have never seen more love and respect between a husband and wife than there is with your mother and father, Arrian. As I remember, it wasn't that way between my parents."

"Having grown up under the protection of that love, I cannot imagine it being otherwise." She raised her face to him and saw the dying rays of the sun played across his dark hair. "I wish the same for this child, Warrick."

"Do you think you would have had a good marriage with Ian? Did I cheat you of the life you wanted with him?"

How could she make him understand that Ian was not the man she had supposed him to be. "I can never know. Mother says one must take the hand life deals them."

There were words he wanted to say to her, but he could not give them voice. "I want to make everything beautiful for you. I wish we could go back to that first day we met. How different it could have been."

Warrick's face was half hidden by the shadow cast by the rippling canvas sail. Her hand was clasped in his, and Arrian wished she could move into his arms and have him hold her. She wanted to hear how he truly felt about the baby—and about her.

"We cannot go back, Warrick. But what would you do if we could?"

He didn't even hesitate, although the words brought him pain. "I would have let you go without planting my seed in your body."

That was not what she had wanted to hear. "It's too late for that, isn't it? I don't feel pity for you because you are bound to a wife and baby you don't want. This was your doing, Warrick."

He released her hand and gripped the railing so hard his knuckles whitened. "Arrian, I don't—"

She felt the cold wind against her cheek and pulled her shawl closer to her for warmth. "I believe you should leave now, Warrick. We will soon be getting underway."

He stared into her eyes for a long moment and then turned away. As he stepped onto the gangplank a man was boarding the
Nightingale
, and Warrick moved aside to allow him to pass.

Arrian watched Warrick leave the ship without a backward glance. Her attention was drawn to the newcomer, whom she recognized as Ian's valet.

"Lady Arrian, I have come with a message from Lord Ian."

Absently she took the packet from the man and went below to her cabin, where she laid lan's message aside, unopened.

*                                          *                                          *

That night Warrick stood in the shadow of a warehouse watching the
Nightingale's
sails catch the wind. With Mactavish at his side, he turned his horse homeward. If he rode hard perhaps he would reach Iron-worth before Arrian arrived.

28

It was an overcast day when the
Nightingale
dropped anchor off the coast of Glencarin. Raile and Kassidy had decided not to accompany Arrian ashore.

They both watched Michael hand Arrian into the longboat with tenderness and then tuck a wrap about her. "Our son will watch over her," Kassidy assured Raile.

"Are you so sure Lord Warrick is the right man for her? Arrian could have chosen from dozens of suitors from the best of families."

"But she wants this man, Raile. In many ways Warrick reminds me of you when we first met."

"Do you suppose our daughter will smooth his rough edges the way you did mine?"

Kassidy laughed. "I didn't smooth your rough edges, dearest, I merely clipped your wandering wings."

Raile watched the figures in the boat grow smaller and smaller. "I pray to God he's good to her."

"He will be," Kassidy said. "He loves her desperately. I only hope he finds the courage to tell her."

Warrick watched from the castle while Arrian and Michael stood on the cliff to wave to their parents as the
Nightingale
caught the evening tide. Even now he couldn't believe she had actually come to him. He had feared she might change her mind at the last moment.

His boots were mud splattered, and he needed a shave. He had ridden day and night so that he would arrive ahead of Arrian. Now that she was here, he could rest.

"Haddy, welcome Lady Arrian and her brother, Lord Michael. Tell them I will see them at dinner."

Wearily, he went to his room. Without undressing or removing his muddy boots, he lay on the bed and immediately fell into an exhausted sleep.

Arrian was sad to see her mother and father leave, but this was where she belonged—to this land and to the man who was its laird.

As the sun set, the sea and sky seemed to merge as one. Arrian turned her gaze to the heather-covered mountains that looked as if nature had splashed them with a purple paint brush. She breathed in the fresh, crisp air and smiled at her brother.

"Isn't it wonderful here? The beauty is such that it takes my breath away."

Elspeth's feet sank into the sand, and she looked disgruntled. "I never liked Scotland."

"I believe it's different from anywhere we've traveled," Michael said. "I have this urge to see many places, Arrian."

"You are growing up, Michael. Soon Father will be giving you more responsibilities."

"I know." He hugged her. "But that's not today. How shall I pass my time here?"

"I'm told the hunting is good. And," she smiled with mischief, "you might want to challenge Warrick to a game of chess. I defeated him."

"Arrian, surely you didn't use those moves Father showed you, did you?"

She laughed. "He was far too arrogant and needed to be taught a lesson."

At that moment Tam and several servants arrived to transport their trunks to the castle. Elspeth directed them with her usual sternness.

"Do you wish ta ride, m'lady?" Tam asked.

"No," she told him. "It's such a glorious day, my brother and I shall walk."

"Not I," Elspeth said, climbing into the wagon.

Taking Michael's hand, Arrian pulled him up the stone steps that led up to the castle.

"When we were children I thought our family would always be together. Now we are about to be scattered to the four winds. Aunt Mary in London. Mother and Father at Ravenworth, and I in Scotland. Where will you be, Michael?"

"Times change, Arrian, and people change with it. But it matters not where our family goes, we will always be bound together by a special bond."

"Yes. I believe that also."

Arrian found, to her surprise, a warm reception from Mrs. Haddington and Barra. She had not expected Warrick to arrive ahead of them, but she was told that he was in his bedroom. She wondered why he had not come down to welcome her.

Arrian no longer occupied Gwendolyn's room but had been moved into the master suite, where her bedchamber and Warrick's were connected by a sitting room.

It had been a long day, and Arrian slipped between crisp, white sheets, aching with weariness.

Elspeth placed a tray on Arrian's lap and then went to stoke the fire. "You need to eat a bit before you sleep."

Arrian groaned. "I don't want to, Elspeth, take it away. When will this sickness pass?"

"In a few weeks, m'lady. Would you want me to sit with you for a time?"

"No. I just want to sleep. I realize now how miserable Aunt Mary must have felt when she was seasick."

"I'll just go below and speak to the housekeeper. She's ranting that I'm taking her place and I want to assure her I'm doing nothing of the kind. I only told her she should employ some of the women from the village. You'll be needing more help to run this place properly."

"Mrs. Haddington is nice when you get to know her, Elspeth."

"I'll soothe her and make certain she knows I'm only here to help."

"You'll do well with her. It's the English and Maclvors she doesn't like."

"She has a liking for you, m'lady."

Arrian yawned, burying her head in the pillow. "Does she? I would have thought otherwise."

Elspeth left the room, closing the door softly behind her.

Arrian's eyes fell on the packet Elspeth had placed beside her bed. She had forgotten all about the message that had been delivered to her on board the
Nightingale
. She reached for it now and tore it open, not really wanting to read anything from Ian. To her surprise the ruby betrothal ring fell into her hand. She stared at it now, feeling as if it were almost a thing of evil. Her hand trembled as she read his scrawled words.

My dearest love,

I return my ring to you, wanting you to keep it as a reminder of the love we once shared. I am confident you will one day slip the ring back on your finger and we will be husband and wife as God intended us to be. Until that day, I remain the man who loves you more than life.

There was a light rap on the connecting doors. She knew it would be Warrick.

She ran her fingers through her tangled hair, excited that he had come to her at last.

He entered, looking strangely uncomfortable. "Do you mind if I sit and talk to you for a moment?"

Her gaze ran over him. His dark hair was wet as if he'd just bathed. "No, of course not."

"I trust you had a smooth voyage. I apologize for not welcoming you on your arrival."

There was a heavy silence.

"You must have ridden hard to arrive so soon," she finally said.

"Yes, I did. I hope you find these rooms comfortable." He looked around, for the first time realizing how shabby they must seem to her.

"I find them very pleasant, Warrick."

He saw the letter she clutched in her hand. "Correspondence so soon?" he asked, assuming it would be from her mother.

She opened her hand and the Maclvors betrothal ring glittered in her palm. "It's from Ian. It arrived just after you left the
Nightingale
."

He stared at the ring he detested. There was coldness in his voice when he spoke. "I'm sorry if I've intruded on your memories of Ian Maclvors. Does he pour out his heart to you in the letter? As for the ring, I'd rather you wore it for all to see than have you cry over it in private."

"Ian is having a difficult time—"

He came to his feet with fury in his eyes. "Spare me. It's apparent that you sleep with his letter and his ring. Do you also sleep with your memories of him?"

"Warrick, you don't understand. I—"

"Oh, I understand. Don't worry that I'll intrude on your private memories. Deliver my child, then you can go back to the man you love, or to hell for all I care."

She struggled for something to say that would clear up this misunderstanding. She held the ring out to him. "I don't want—"

Warrick walked to the door and stood looking at her for a long moment. "I forced you to marry me, and I implored you to return because of the child. Have no fear, I will not force my company upon you. You will be left alone with your memories."

He hesitated at the door, as if reluctant to leave. But she turned away from him. "I just want to be alone," she said.

Arrian watched him leave the room and close the door behind him.

He had assumed the worst and had not even allowed her to explain. She had envisioned this reunion quite differently. In her foolish heart she had thought he would come to her with words of love. Instead he had been hard and accusing.

What demons were driving him? Would he ever be able to put his distrust aside and accept her love?

The weather turned gloriously warm.

Arrian went down the stairs to join Michael, who was waiting for her with the horses for their daily ride. As she passed the salon, she noticed that workmen were rolling up the tattered rug.

"Mrs. Haddington, what are they doing?" Arrian asked the housekeeper, who was watching the workers to make certain they didn't break anything.

"We're having a housecleaning. Taking all the rugs and draperies up and having women from the village come in to help clean." Mrs. Haddington looked disapprovingly toward the library. "His lordship's engaged that Mrs. Robertson to help oversee the villagers' work."

Arrian felt her temper rising. "And why is that?"

"I don't rightly know, m'lady."

At that moment the library door opened and Arrian saw Louise Robertson carrying an armload of draperies. Mrs. Haddington sniffed and mumbled under her breath. "She reaches above her station. Thinks she's lady of the manor."

Louise Robertson approached. "Lady Arrian, I'm sorry you haven't been well. I wanted to call on you, but Warrick insisted you weren't to be disturbed. I felt honored that he wanted me to take your place here at Iron-worth."

Arrian stared at the woman. "Whatever do you mean?"

There was a slight smile on the woman's lips. "I merely meant that you are too ill to take on the household duties, so I'm doing your part."

"I'm not ill, Mrs. Robertson."

"Perhaps not. But I have been led to believe you are of a delicate nature."

Arrian was seething inside. "If you will excuse me, Mrs. Robertson. I won't keep you from your appointed task."

Louise Robertson blocked Arrian's path. "Warrick has said the rugs are to be replaced. I was wondering if you have a preference in color."

Arrian was startled to see such dislike in the woman's eyes. "I'm sure my husband and I will decide on that. You indicated you were only to supervise the cleaning."

"I had hoped to convince you to speak to Warrick on my behalf."

"For what reason?"

"I have asked him if he would like me to oversee the decorating of Ironworth, and he mentioned that he would have to consult you. I'm sure you don't want to be bothered with such a menial task."

That will be up to my husband." Arrian moved around the woman. "In the future, Mrs. Robertson, if you want to speak to me, consult my maid."

By the time she reached the front door, her anger had still not cooled. Elspeth handed Arrian her gloves. "The few times I've come against that one, I've found her cold and distant. I might also add, she has eyes for your husband."

"Perhaps he admires her," Arrian said, angrily working her fingers into her leather riding gloves. "All I could think about while that woman talked was how beautiful Raven worth is at this time of year."

Elspeth caught Arrian's hand. "If it was me, m'lady, I'd not let the fox in the stable."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Mrs. Haddington says that woman has had her eyes on his lordship for years. She said they might have married after her husband died. But Lord Warrick married you instead."

"I'm surprised you listen to idle prattle, Elspeth. I'm not concerned with that woman's interest in my husband. I'd rather know about her suitability for decorating. She seems to want to make Ironworth over for Warrick."

"Well, I'm keeping an eye on her. There's something about her that I don't trust," Elspeth said, going back into the house and leaving Arrian to ponder her warning.

Arrian's face lit up when she saw Mactavish talking to Michael. She hurried down the steps toward them. "Hello, Mactavish," she greeted him with genuine pleasure.

"M'lady, I was hoping to see you this morning." His eyes brightened as they rested on her face. "If you don't mind my saying so, you're prettier than ever."

"Thank you, Mactavish." On studying him closer, she saw a deep, raw scar across his forehead, and there were circles under his eyes as if he'd been ill. "What has happened to you?"

He touched the scar and smiled at her. "It's just a reminder of Ian Maclvors's hospitality."