Highway To Armageddon (33 page)

           
“You’ve been tracking me with a GPS device?” Boom Boom screams at the top of
her lungs. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her so angry. She takes off both of
her boots and peers inside.

           
“You won’t find the chip unless you cut your shoe up,” Arrow says sheepishly.
He’s probably hoping Boom Boom doesn’t hurl a dagger at his head.

           
“When did you do this?” Boom Boom growls.

           
“Remember when we went to lunch a few months ago, after you broke up with Lance
for like the 100
^th
time? I bought you a new pair of boots and put
the GPS chip in the heel when you weren’t paying attention.”

           
“You actually went on a date with this loser?” I shout, jabbing my thumb in
Arrow’s face.

           
Boom Boom’s cheeks turn red. “It was just lunch. You and I had broken up and I
was upset, so I went to the market by myself. I ran into Arrow, we had lunch,
and he… he bought me new boots because I told him I needed a new pair.”

           
Boom Boom puts her head in her hands and groans. “I’m so stupid! Why do I keep
letting him manipulate me?”

           
“For the 1,000
^th
time, Red, I’m sorry,” Arrow says impatiently.
“I’ll make it up to you someday. I swear. But we have to save my mom! Time is
of the essence!”

           
“How do you know she’s not already dead?” I ask bluntly.

           
“Lance,” Boom Boom snaps.

           
“Hey, I didn’t kidnap her,” I snap back. “I’m simply asking an honest question.
Machete was captured by freaking Neo-Nazis. How do we know they haven’t killed
her already?”

           
“She’s not dead,” Arrow says. “They don’t usually kill their captures right
away.”

           
I can tell from his shaky voice that he’s starting to have doubts.

           
“Arrow’s right,” Boom Boom says, rushing to his defense like usual. “The
Dresden hunters are like savage animals that play with their food before eating
it. After the hunters capture their prey in the woods, they put them to work in
their concentration camps for a few weeks before lynching them. Their ‘lynching
parties’ are usually a day-long celebration that takes place on Saturdays. The
celebrations culminate with several non-Aryans being hung in front of a
cheering crowd.”

           
“That’s sick,” I say in disgust. It then dawns on me what day it is. “Wait a
minute, today’s Saturday!”

           
Boom Boom glances at the time on her goggles. “It’s 10:00, too. They’re going
to start the lynching in two hours.”

           
Arrow’s face becomes enveloped in a mask of anguish. “Please, guys, help me
save her. I can’t do it on my own.”

           
“I’m sure they wouldn’t kill her right away. However…” Boom Boom pauses to shoot
me a discreet glance. She always does that when she’s about to say something I
won’t like.

           
“No, Boom Boom, don’t even say it,” I warn. “Don’t…”

           
“We should probably go rescue her tonight,” Boom Boom says over my shouts of
protest.

           
Arrow breathes a sigh of relief. “Thank you, Red. Thank you so much. I swear
I’ll pay you back someday.”

           
“Are you out of your mind?” I holler at Boom Boom. “You’re going to help this
scumbag after all the crap he’s pulled? We need to go after Rasputin, not go on
some suicidal rescue mission for some crazy lady who hates us!”

           
“I’m not going to leave Machete to be brutally lynched,” Boom Boom says
defiantly. “I would never be able to live with myself. You can stay here if you
want, but I’m going with Arrow.”

           
I throw my hands into the air and curse, but Boom Boom has me by my throat. She
knows I won’t let her go to Dresden without me.

           
Whether I like it or not, we’re about to go to war with a bunch of Nazis.

Chapter Twelve:
Boom Boom

           
Arrow sits perched on a tree branch about 20 feet off the ground. I’m dismayed
to find him aiming his poisoned arrow at one of the five Klansmen sitting
around their raging bonfire. The flickering flames make their white robes look
red and orange. They resemble demons from the depths of Hell. And in a way
that’s precisely what they are. Still, Arrow promised he wouldn’t use lethal
force. The compulsive liar.

           
Lance is no better. He promised the same thing, and yet he’s perched in another
tree, his pistol aimed at another Klansman. I hate the Ku Klux Klan and
Neo-Nazis just as much as the next person, but I don’t like killing people
without provocation. It’s unethical, immoral, and cowardly. At least, that’s
what I believe.

           
I glance at Krystal, who’s hiding in the bushes with me. She has her goggles on
and is smiling. I don’t think she’s even paying attention to what’s going on.
She’s watching one of her TV shows. Un-freaking-believable.

           
I turn to find Dorothy peeking out from some bushes about 100 yards behind us.
She looks both excited and scared. I wanted her to stay in the car, but she
begged to tag along. I reluctantly gave in, under one condition; she had to
stay out of the way. So far she’s the only one who listened to me.

           
I’m actually a bit shocked we got here as quickly as we did. Since it was so
close to midnight, we flew to Dresden at break-neck speed. (First we had to
convince Krystal not to kill Arrow when we brought him inside the cave. She
wanted payback for having to hike a ‘million miles’. An agreement was reached
when Arrow offered to rub the corns on Krystal’s feet at least once a day.)

           
Actually, we never officially reached Dresden. About one mile from the city
gates we came across this very bonfire. We decided to check it out. After all,
we still needed disguises. Arrow and Krystal are the type of people the
Neo-Nazis like to lynch, and Lance and I are on wanted posters all across the
country.

           
We parked about a quarter mile from the campsite (Arrow’s car is currently
hidden behind some bushes) and hiked to this very spot. I’m glad we decided to
stop. The Klansmen’s white robes and hoods should conceal us quite nicely. The
trick, of course, is getting the robes
off
of the Klansmen. If I left it
up to Arrow and Lance, they’d riddle the robes with bullets and arrows, soaking
them in blood. Like that wouldn’t arouse suspicion.

           
I loudly whisper, “What are you guys doing?”

           
Steading his bow, Arrow replies, “I’m about to blast one of these douchebags
right in the eye. A quick and clean death, more than he deserves.”

           
“And I’m about to shoot this other dude in the throat,” Lance says.

           
“I said no lethal force!” I say in a borderline shout.

           
“Fine, I’ll hit him in the kneecap.” Arrow lowers his bow ever so slightly.

           
“It doesn’t matter where you shoot him, all of your arrows are poisoned.”

           
“Oh, right. I should just get him in the eye then.” Arrow readjusts his bow.

           
I sigh and march toward the campsite.

           
“What are you doing?” Lance shouts. “Get back here!”

           
I wave him off. “I got this. Watch and learn, fellas.”

           
Lance and Arrow continue shouting at me, but I ignore them. We’ve spilt enough
blood over the past several days. This is a situation I can resolve without
engaging in a bloody massacre.

           
The five Klansmen are so tipsy from their giant mugs of beer that they don’t
notice me until I’m right in front of them.

           
Sounding like the world’s biggest redneck, the guy in the center slurs, “Hey,
what are you doing out here?” He then burps, hiccups, and farts all at the same
time. (I wish I was kidding.)

           
A Klansmen to his left drunkenly raises a gun. “We don’t like trespassers.”

           
Another Klansmen smacks the gun down. “Don’t shoot her, Barry. She’s smoking
hot.”

           
Barry gawks at me through the eyeholes of his hood. “Gee, you’re right, Larry.
She’s gorgeous.”

           
The others mumble their agreement.

           
I shake my hips and seductively say, “At ease, boys. I’m just out for a little
late night stroll. I sure could use a drink, though.’

           
The Klansmen stumble all over themselves in an attempt to offer me their
drinks. I grab one of the mugs and raise it in the air. “To racial purity!”

           
The Klansmen raise their mugs as well and shout, “To racial purity!”

           
They then bring the mugs to the slits in their hoods where their mouths are. I
pretend to take a sip, but I don’t open my lips. Booze tastes like crap to me.

           
I wait a few seconds for the Klansmen to get even drunker than they already
are. Then I attack. I smash my mug over the head of the Klansmen to my direct
left. He yelps and stumbles out of his chair. I follow up with a stiff kick to
his head. The Klansman slumps over in a groaning heap.

           
It takes the other Klansmen a few seconds to register what’s going on. That’s
all the time I need. In rapid-fire succession I kick all the Klansmen in the
head. Within seconds the white supremacists are sprawled out on the ground,
moaning in agony.

           
Lance, Arrow, Dorothy, and Krystal all run over to me with huge grins.

           
“That was awesome, Red,” Arrow gushes, wrapping me up in his muscular arms.
“You are so hardcore.”

           
A giggle escapes my lips. “Thanks. Now put me down, you’re making me dizzy.”

           
Arrow releases me and I stagger back. He grabs my arm so I don’t topple over.
“Sorry, Red. I got a little over-excited.”

           
I’m about to say something when I remember I’m supposed to be pissed at Arrow,
not giggling at his cheesy come-ons. I frown and pull away.

           
Krystal slaps me on the back. “Girl, you are crazy. That’s why I love you.”

           
Dorothy claps excitedly. “You have got to show me how to do that.”

           
I actually do plan on showing Dorothy some self-defense maneuvers after we get
back to Sanctuary 7. I’ll make sure no man ever abuses her again.

           
Lance flashes me a discreet grin. He doesn’t have to tell me he thinks I’m
badass. I already know he does.

           
We tear off the Klansmen’s robes and hoods and put them on. The outfits are a
bit loose, but at least they cover us up.

           
I stare at the groaning Klansmen in disgust. They’re all white, balding,
middle-aged Neo-Nazis with swastika tattoos on their arms and chests.

           
“I feel like a ghost,” Krystal cracks, flapping her arms. “
Ohhhhhh….
”

           
Adjusting my lopsided hood, I say, “You know, guys, this is supposed to be a
stealth mission. We’re going in to find Machete and sneaking her out. We really
don’t need five people. In fact, we might arouse suspicion if we all go in
clumped together.”

           
“Good point, Boom Boom,” Lance says. “Arrow and Dorothy should stay out here.”

           
“What?” Arrow hollers.

           
“Why me?” Dorothy pouts, her voice muffled under her hood.

           
“Well, Arrow should stay out here because he’s a stupid idiot,” Lance explains.
“And Dorothy, you should stay out here because I don’t want you getting hurt.”

           
Dorothy and Arrow start shouting. I raise my arms and say, “Everyone shut up!
We don’t have time for this. It’s almost midnight. I agree that Dorothy should
stay out here, but Arrow is coming with us. We are saving his mother, after
all.”       
           

           
“Thank you, Red,” Arrow says.

           
“I told you not to call me that!” I snap.

           
I turn to Krystal. “Take Dorothy back to the car and wait for us. Keep your
goggles on in case we run into trouble. We may need you to fly in after us.”

           
Krystal shrugs. “Whatever gets me out of wearing this silly robe. My ancestors
must be rolling over in their graves.”

           
Krystal takes off her white supremacist attire and tosses it into the bonfire.
Dorothy does the same. I can’t wait until I can take mine off. I hate
everything these robes stand for.

           
Lance wags his finger in Krystal’s face. “Pay attention this time. If we send a
distress signal, come get us!”

           
Krystal puts her hands on her hips and sticks out her bottom lip. “You don’t
have to talk to me like I’m five, Lance. Do you think I’m an idiot?”

           
A smirk creeps across Lance’s lips. I clamp my hand over his mouth before he
says something to get Krystal all riled up.