His Darkest Hunger (16 page)

Jaxon’s brother was almost a duplicate, when it came to his features, but he was larger both in height and in bulk. She felt the hard muscles tense
at her forward greeting, but they quickly softened and she laughed up into the wicked green eyes that regarded her closely. They glinted with both open warmth and something devilish, which manifested itself as his grin widened and he reciprocated, wrapping his long arms around her like a silky net.

She was crushed against him, and he laughed softly against her neck, “I better behave myself or he’s going to blow.” Gently, she was released, and a genuine feeling of warmth had her pausing. It was tinged with sadness at the realization that it was a reaction she hadn’t felt in a long while.

Jagger had never been part of their unit in PATU. He was overseas in Iraq most of the time she’d been with his brother. She’d met him several months after joining Jaxon’s unit. He had come home on leave, and they instantly clicked. He was a tough soldier and deadly at his job, and if you were part of his inner circle, he was loyal to the bitter end.

She had always liked that about Jagger. There was no second guessing. He was a no bullshit kinda guy.

Critically, Libby ran her eyes over him. He’d become one hell of a sexy specimen. He had matured. There was no longer any hint of boyishness about him…well, until he smiled. The eyes were still devastating, but there was something there; a void, a wariness that she could sense because it was akin to the feelings that coursed deep inside her.

Cupping his face with her hands, she could see the pain that he tried to hide from everyone. It called to her. It was so like her own. “Jagger, you’ve grown up.”

His eyes softened and he chuckled. “Well, you look
exactly as I remember. You’re still the same hot little blonde that Jaxon would never leave me alone with.”

Libby shook her head. They both knew that was a bald-faced lie, but she appreciated the sentiment.

He was a charmer, for sure, and she wondered if there was anyone in his life. Then she sighed inwardly. He was a jaguar warrior, and in so many ways just like his brother. She wasn’t sure it was in their genetic makeup to trust and to love.

“When you’re done copping a feel over there, Jagger,” Jaxon said, “I’d like to have a few minutes of your time. If it’s not too much trouble.”

The sarcastic words elicited a wide grin from the younger Castille. He winked down at Libby and whispered as he moved away, “This is gonna be fun. He’s already frothing at the mouth, and I haven’t even begun to work it.”

Libby turned around, her violet eyes flashing as they connected with the Jaxon’s. Clearly, he was pissed, and he looked dangerous as all hell. She felt a shiver course through her, and as his eyes dropped to her chest, the tightening of her nipples crested against the thin T-shirt that she wore.

When his eyes met hers again, they were lit with an inner fire that was part madness and most definitely tinged with desire.

She felt her stomach flutter but did not break eye contact, instead following slowly behind Jagger. The large parchment they had spread out was a detailed map of Mexico and several surrounding countries, including Honduras and Belize.

She felt that little flip inside her once more, and nervous tension washed over her in waves. She could see they had red-flagged an area on the south-
east side of Mexico, near Cozumel. There were also a series of red-flagged areas in Guatemala, Honduras, and Belize.

Libby felt a slow burn begin as she studied the map. None of the red flags were anywhere near where they needed to be. The burn intensified, and her gut contracted as anger flushed through her veins. Her breathing increased, and the sound of her heart beating fast in her breast was so loud, she was sure everyone in the room heard.

It was obvious what was going on, and she was having none of it. This was her mission. Not his. He thought to leave without her? Christ, he didn’t even know where to look.

Her fury burst forth. “What the hell are you doing, Castille?” she demanded, and once more five pairs of eyes landed on her.

She crossed over to him in seconds, and her hand arced out, sweeping the map from the table. Just as quickly, Jaxon’s large hand snaked out and he grabbed hold of her arm in a steel grip. She wanted to cry out as pain radiated down from her wrist, but clenched her teeth, her hatred and anger spewing forth from her eyes.

“Leave us,” Jaxon growled menacingly, and cast a dark look at the others, who appeared stunned by the ferocity of his order. The cold tone of his voice brooked no arguments, and one by one they cleared the area, leaving the two of them alone. Ana cast a sly look toward Libby on her way out, and Libby fought the urge to stick her tongue out at the vampire as she disappeared into the basement.

“Are you going to let go or are you trying to crush my wrist?”

Jaxon cursed and loosened his grip, drawing a rough hand through the messy crop of hair atop his head. He started to speak, and she watched him slowly gain control of the fierce emotions at war inside him.

“I’ve made arrangements for you to be taken to a safe place until this is all over. As soon as the transport arrives, we’ll head out.”

“You will not keep me from going to Belize. You will not.”

She was breathing hard, and began to pace as anxiety ravaged her limbs. She was like a junkie coming down from a high, and she sure as hell wasn’t ready for it.

“I told you last night I was going. I guess you didn’t listen too well, because I also said I would kill anyone that stands in my way. And that includes you, Jaxon. Don’t think for one second I would hesitate to put a bullet through your brain if you dared to try and keep me here.”

Libby felt a weight settle on her chest. Why the hell did everything have to be so hard? Why couldn’t he just let her be?

He regarded her with frozen, black eyes, but remained silent.

“You will not keep me from Belize.”

She kicked at the scattered parchments on the floor and snarled, “From the looks of those, you have no clue where to look anyway. I’m willing to lead you straight to Degas and Frank. What more could you ask?”

His face remained closed, and the familiar blankness that he used so successfully when on mission
shrouded his features. It dawned on her then exactly what his problem was.

He didn’t trust her. Hell, right at this very moment he was most likely thinking that she was part of some nefarious plan to trap both him and his brother deep in DaCosta land. She kicked the maps again as her anger bubbled up. She took a second, not trusting her voice, but thoughts of her baby stolen from her breast overcame her.

“What do you want to know?” Libby asked.

Her voice was soft, halting, and it hung in the air between them as something flickered in the depths of his eyes. It was illusive, gone just as quick as it had arrived.

“Everything.”

L
ibby continued to stare long and hard at Jaxon. The last thing she wanted to do right now was revisit her not too distant past. One that was so chock full of pain and torment, she could feel her insides tightening, like she’d inhaled a gallon of sour milk.

Her muscles were strung so tight, her teeth clenched so hard, that a dull ache formed along her jawbone. With great effort she forced her body to relax.

Her eyes wandered toward the large window that welcomed the wilderness so intimately into the cabin. Early morning fog shrouded the edges of the forest, and it crept over the grass, lingering along the path beyond the small hill. Birds were chirping away, happily unaware of the darkness that resided so deep in her mind.

She closed her eyes, welcoming the agony that
lanced her heart, thinking that maybe by sharing she’d be able to chase the demons that haunted her still. If anything, he should know what her love for him had cost her.

“They took me an hour after you left, that day.
An hour
.”

Her voice was quiet but she made no effort to speak louder.

“We’d made love, do you remember? Although I suppose we could have called it breakup sex, because I knew then it was over. I’m sure it wasn’t hard for them to track me, since my body was drenched in your scent.”

Libby moved away from the window and glanced back toward Jaxon. Her face remained closed, tense, but his eyes followed her movements and she could feel the heat of his gaze.

“I still wonder if, maybe if I’d had my wits about me, it would have all turned out differently. Maybe I would have been able to escape. Or not.” She shook her head. “I don’t know. Either way, when they attacked, it was fast and precise. They used some kind of drug to knock me out, and when I woke up, I was in a crate. My hands were tied and I had a rag stuck in my mouth.” She paused, exhaling softly. “It was dark, I was cold, wet. I didn’t see the light for a few more hours. Considering what was in store for me, it would have been much better to have remained blind.”

Libby’s voice wavered and she didn’t bother to stop the tears that pricked the edges of her eyes.

“I realized right away who was responsible for my kidnapping. Fat Frank was literally drooling
when I wouldn’t answer any of his brother’s questions. They wanted to know where you and Diego were. They wanted the both of you dead, but like the trained agent that I was, there was no way in hell I was giving it up. Not even after Degas left and Frank moved in with all his torture paraphernalia.”

She turned to him then, her eyes full of fire and the need for him to know how hard she’d tried to keep it together. “I didn’t say shit to them, not when they stripped me, not when he used a knife to cut into my flesh…not even when they used cigarettes to burn me. I held it deep inside of me, but then…”

“Then what?” Jaxon’s harsh voice cut through her, and Libby turned her tortured eyes away. His voice softened, maybe even trembled a bit. “Did they…did they rape you, Libby?”

She laughed outright at that.

The sound was hysterical and tinny, and she caught the grimace that flashed across his face. “No. They never touched me in that way. Frank liked to torture, but Degas made it quite clear that a DaCosta would never lower himself to have sex with someone like me. A Castille whore. I don’t think I was called by my name again. And when they found out…” Her voice trailed off and she hushed, her eyes falling to the fingers that nervously worried the worn edges of the T-shirt she wore.

“When they found out what?”

“A woman came into the room. She was a jaguar, I could tell. It was in the way her skin shimmered when she moved, and when she looked at me and came so close I could see the veins in her eyeballs, I knew it was over.”

Libby’s eyes darkened at the memory, and she felt the anger that stuck in her throat, like a heavy dose of bile.

“She took her time sniffing my skin, my mouth, and when she knelt down and touched my belly, I thought I was going to throw up. She knew. She told Frank I was pregnant, and when he aimed a crowbar at my midsection I broke down. I was only a few months along, but already this life inside of me had my heart and my soul and I knew I needed to fight for it.”

Libby avoided Jaxon’s gaze as she continued. “I gave it up right then and there. They told me that if I cooperated they’d spare my life and the life of my unborn child. I told them everything they wanted to know, praying the entire time that you’d make it through, and a few days later when they told me they’d killed Diego, I felt…like Fat Frank
had
gone ahead and slammed that bat into my gut. They told me you and Declan had managed to escape. So they were keeping me…biding their time.”

She turned eyes full of accusation and anger on him then, and she noticed the sudden whiteness around his mouth and the bleakness that surrounded his dark eyes.

“I know it was my fault the unit was attacked, and that because of me, Diego died. But I had no choice and I would do it again if I had to. Surely you must understand that.” Her eyes filled with unshed tears and she looked away as her voice softened with the weight of emotion she was feeling. “I
needed
for you to understand. So I waited for you to come for me. It’s the one thing that got me through those dark
months. As time passed and my belly grew with the life we’d created, my hope turned to despair. When my time came and they cut our baby from my body, took
Logan
from my breast, my despair turned to hatred. I cursed you and everything that you loved that day, Jaxon.”

Jaxon watched as Libby’s eyes glazed over, and the tight coil of desperate anguish that pounded in him made it hard to breathe. His sorrow at everything lost was complete. His cousin, Libby, and now a child he’d not known existed. Bitterness washed over him as he thought of the pain and torture imposed upon this woman.

His Libby
.

The one that he knew was meant for him, and only him. He just hoped it wasn’t too late to make things right. There was a river of hatred, mistrust, and pain between them, and he had no clue if it would ever be bridged. Sorrow washed over him at the thought of the way he’d treated her. Like garbage. Like less than garbage.

But he knew he had to try. Circumstance, fate…whatever you wanted to call it had conspired to separate him from his mate, and he would not let it happen again. If it did, he feared the darkness that lived inside his soul would claim the last shred of humanity that still lingered.

And he would be lost forever.

“Libby, I had no idea. Why didn’t you tell me about the baby?”

“Are you fucking joking? I tried to! That last day, I tried to tell you everything. All I wanted was one small crumb of commitment, something for me to
hold onto. And what did I get? Nothing. Not one goddamn thing.”

She crossed to just in front of him, chest heaving. Jaxon mentally shook himself, thinking she was the most amazing thing he’d ever laid eyes on. She poked him hard in the chest and he did nothing to avoid contact. If anything, heat fingered out from her touch, and the cat began to make noise. He clenched his hands in an effort to maintain control over the chaotic blend of emotions that knocked about inside him.

“I let you make love to me one more time because I couldn’t stand the thought of never feeling your body against mine again. How pathetic is that? I knew you didn’t want me. I knew that you didn’t love me enough to claim me as yours, and yet I still craved your body like it was liquid candy. I let you use me, and then you left.”

He knew the truth that lived in her words would haunt him till the end of his days. He
had
used her selfishly. He’d not wanted to acknowledge the hold she’d had over him back then. He must have known on some level that she was the only woman for him. And like the coward he’d been, he had abandoned her, and when she disappeared, he’d been quick to believe the worst.

Because it hurt less.

And now they were here, in this time and place with a whole world of hurt and blackness between them.

All because of the DaCosta clan.

He would take his lumps and admit to the mistakes he’d made, but his life—
Libby’s life—
had been interrupted, altered and torn all to hell.

For that, he would make every last DaCosta pay with their life.

He felt tendrils of excitement wind along the edges of his mind, down his body, and out to his limbs until he was humming in anticipation of the hunt. He would start there. He would have his revenge on the DaCosta clan, and they would know the fury of a Castille.

He would worry about everything else later.

Libby had turned her back to him, and he reached out his hand, wanting to touch, to comfort…to
something
.

“Libby, I…” He didn’t know how to continue. There were no words to express the pain he felt for her. And he would take to his grave the knowledge that he was responsible for all that had happened.

“Don’t bother with an apology, Jaxon. It’s way too late for that. I don’t want anything from you.” She looked directly at him, her violet eyes wet with unshed tears, “except a ride to Belize.”

Her body was still so very frail, but he noted the determination and strength in the set of her shoulders. He recognized the signs. There would be no swaying Libby when her mind was set.

Her body hunched inward as if she knew he was hovering.

Jaxon dropped his hands to his sides and turned from her, catching the emerald green eyes of his brother. Jagger nodded, and Jaxon made a decision then that he hoped he’d not live to regret. He was going to Belize, and it looked like he would have more company than he’d wanted along for the hunt.

“We leave in ten minutes. We’ve chartered a flight
to Texas, where we’ll be rendezvousing with Julian. I’ll contact him and see about getting you some proper gear.”

Jaxon waited for a response, and when there was nothing, turned to leave. A thought struck him then, one that had him pausing mid-stride.

“How did you escape them, and end up in Michigan?”

“I didn’t escape, Jaxon.” She laughed, a hoarse sound that slid across the room like sandpaper. “Don’t you get it? Nothing I did was of my own volition. This is all part of some plan.”

He whirled back around, puzzled and not liking it. “I don’t understand.”

“Well, join the club. Something big is going down. I don’t know what it is. The DaCostas are into some heavy shit, and for whatever reason, they felt the need to even the playing field and get rid of your unit at PATU.”

He watched as Libby began to pace back and forth, and he tried to shake off the sick feeling of dread forming in the pit of his gut.

“They took me three years ago because they wanted to wipe out the entire unit. They fucked up and it didn’t happen. So they kept me. At the time I wasn’t sure why, but now I’m thinking they’re closer to whatever it is they’re looking for. They needed
me
to flush you out, to blindside you.”

She crossed the room until she was only a few inches away. Her eyes were heavy with emotion, and his heart ached at the thought of how much she had lost because of him.

“
I didn’t escape
. There was this man, his face
is fuzzy but I’m sure he’s the one who wiped my memory. He’s working with them and
he
left me in Michigan.”

She shook her head. “We’re just a bunch of puppets, and they’re pulling our strings.”

She turned from him then, her posture tense but her voice determined. “Personally, I don’t give a rat’s ass what they’re up to. I just want them to pay for what they did to me.”

Jaxon’s brain went into overdrive. Suddenly everything seemed so much more complicated. What the fuck
were
the DaCostas up to?

His desire to wrap his arms around Libby was so strong it almost hurt. But she’d closed herself off to him, and after a few more moments he quietly left the room. He was filled to the brim with pent-up energy, and it pulsed through him with every heavy beat of his heart.

He needed to clear his mind. He needed to focus.

He snarled bitterly as he felt everything fade away, leaving him quiet, almost serene—yet incredibly deadly.

He had DaCostas to hunt. The cat roared inside at the coming task, and Jaxon welcomed the aggressive nature that lived in him.

Saliva pooled in his mouth, and ignoring the excited tremble that shimmered over his taut skin, he went in search of the rest of his team.

They met the small chartered plane at a local air field close to the Canadian border. It was a somber bunch. Ana was pissed that Libby had been allowed to tag along, but Jaxon ignored her surly attitude. In fact he had briefly considered leaving Ana behind.
Being a vampire, the heat, humidity, and sunlight were more then she could take. But she was a fierce fighter, and once their base was set up in Belize, she could man it while the rest of them hunted the enemy.

A little over three hours later they landed on a private airstrip just east of Houston. It was owned by a group associated with his family’s holdings, and Jaxon felt a tug of emotion run through him at the familiar face of his oldest brother, who was there to greet him.

Julian was three years older, and though all three Castille boys were similar in both coloring and physique, he was truly worlds apart from his siblings, just a different animal altogether. He was a jaguar; that was something he couldn’t change even if he wanted to. But when Julian’s body shifted, he became the spotted creature most associated with the great predators, his rosettes golden. Black cats were rare indeed, and in his race only those bearing the warrior tattoo were covered in a thick black pelt when they shifted into their animal form.

Jaxon and Julian had been very close when they were younger, but when Jaxon matured and warrior tattoos began forming on his body, a distance had crept between them, one that only widened with time. Jaxon had gone the way of the warrior, forging a career for himself in the military, and Jagger had followed in his footsteps.

Julian, however, had followed the path laid out by their father, and as of now was basically running Blue Heaven Industries. The entire operation was an ode to the temple where the ancient jaguar warriors worshiped, one that belonged to their god of
war, Huitzilopochtli. Jaxon snorted at that thought. It was ironic, considering how antiwarrior both his father and brother were. It was a bone of contention that the warrior gene was prevalent in his mother’s family, something the elder Castille had thought he was avoiding with their union. His father had built the company up from meager beginnings and made it successful, but with Julian at the helm, it had diversified and quadrupled in both size and worth.