Hold Me Close (2 page)

Fucking A. Just when she thought she knew what to expect, he blew her mind again.

* * *

Dex leaned over his clipboard to see which victim had signed up for his station next. He forced his mind to get back under control. From the corner of his eye, he could see Bonnie watching him, her mouth still open in shock. As much as that made him want to smile, he couldn't. The damned woman was driving him insane.
 

All month long she avoided him as if he didn't exist, leaving him with only memories of how she responded perfectly to him on the cross during their last scene. His job at Purgatory had always kept him in plenty of pussy and masochistic subbies. And he'd been just fine with that. Until Bonnie asked him to help her. She wasn't the first and he doubted she'd be the last, so he easily agreed to this stupid deal. Now with his head locked up and his insides twisted, he had the sense the whole situation mocked him. He couldn't stop thinking about her, every day and night.

If he had any smarts left in his half-baked brain, he'd end this charade tonight. As much as they both enjoyed their sessions, he could never forget the guilt in her eyes the next day or the days after. Those haunted visions of green were etched into his memory.
 

Everyone in the club knew about her Dom and what happened. He'd gotten sick quick and died even quicker, leaving his submissive a little lost and a lot sad. It was easy to see she wasn't over him yet. But did that stop him? Like the selfish asshole Dex was, he'd agreed to be her recovery Dom because he wanted to get his hands on her gorgeous body more than anything. Then he got pissed when it wasn't enough.

The original terms of their agreement had put sex strictly off limits. He could touch all he wanted, but no penetration. Over time, he'd worked her past some of her limits to the point that fingers and toys were permissible. And since then, he'd imagined her every third Saturday of the month going home to a fucking vibrator. Because a woman like her was never going to be truly satisfied without getting fucked.
 

Said like the horny dickhead who couldn’t think of anything else but getting his dick in her at least once—so he could walk away. He was such an asshole.

If he was a better man, he'd leave now and not look back. Gabe could handle the club just fine without him here and he had a busy tattoo shop to keep his mind off of a certain brunette with eyes that displayed every emotion that went through her mind. Only no matter how many clients he worked on or how much art he inked, his mind always returned to Bonnie.
 

He'd known her Dom well and, looking back, he knew Jim was his polar opposite in every way. His friend had been older and wiser with no chaos in his life, and Bonnie had been his perfect little baby girl. Dex most definitely did not need a girl. He wanted a woman strong enough to take him on and one who liked to fuck. A lot. Far more than a gentle baby girl knew how to handle.

If she ever found out what he really wanted from her, well, he fully expected her to run as fast and as far as she could. He doubted there was a gentle bone in his body.
 

Dex watched the wind blow strands of silky hair across her face when someone opened the outside door beside her. She smiled and stamped the two men's hands as they greeted her and bent closer to say something to one of them. His gut twisted in a tight ball. He tightened his hands into fists and ground down with his back teeth. The interest in the other man's eyes was obvious even from across the room. She had that effect on nearly all the men in the club, and it was only out of respect for her former Dom that most remained hands off. Except for newbies like these two assholes. Both men smiled and one reached for her shoulder.
 

"You look like you're about to tear someone a new one."

Dex jerked at Gabe's voice behind him. He'd been so caught up on what was going on with Bonnie, he didn’t see the club manager approach.

"It's nothing." He turned his back on the scene pissing him off and grabbed one of the floggers from the row on the wall. She deserved better than those idiot wannabes ogling her like a piece of meat, and she definitely deserved better than him.

"Uh huh. We're still over an hour from shutdown on these stations and you're about to start bouncing off the walls any second."

Dex rolled his shoulders a few times and took a deep breath before he turned to Gabe. "Really, it's all good. I'm ready for my next victim."
 

The shrewd eyes staring at him narrowed. "Don't bullshit me. I am not in the mood. In one corner I've got you giving off
fuck you
vibes to the whole world and then there's her." He tilted his head in the direction of Bonnie. "She's not much better. Her nerves have manifested into pheromones that have turned half the Doms in the club into pussy hunters. They want what they can't have and it's making everyone crazy. Worse than a goddamned full moon."
 

"Damn right they can't have her."
 

"Spoken like a true possessive Dom."

Dex reared back and turned from staring holes into the back of Bonnie's head. "I am not her Dom. You of all people know the deal. It just happens to be her night and she's more than ready for it. In a few hours, I'll have her taken care of and all of this can be forgotten." Not that he really believed either of them would be sated as easily as in the past. He'd already set a plan in motion for an entirely new scene for them tonight.

"Not yours." Gabe didn't say it as a question. Instead it was a statement that mocked his thoughts. "If that's the case, then it's time to start turning her over to one. I've had many good prospects inquire about her and she needs something more permanent."

"She isn't some sort of club girl to be passed around to the members to be tried out or sold at auction, you know. She's special. And she's still grieving."

"Maybe. Maybe not. But something's got to be done," Gabe said, his lips pinching into a deep frown. "She can't let this hold her back indefinitely."

"I said I'd take care of it and I meant it. She'll be back to normal by her next shift."

"I hope you're right. Although—" Gabe shifted and turned. "I think she's at her crossroad and a decision needs to be made." With that Gabe clapped him on the shoulder and wandered off, probably to deal with some other problem he needed to referee.

Maybe he was right. She deserved to find someone who fulfilled her more than once a month. Someone who'd care for her with the kid gloves she deserved. Dex shook his head. Definitely not him. Except he couldn't stop thinking about touching her. Most of his waking moments were consumed with the desire to sink his teeth into her. Along with his dick.
 

Tonight was the night. He felt it clear to his bones. He'd waited a long time for this and the anticipation had reached a head. Tonight she'd beg him to fuck her and once he did, he could finally step aside and let the right man take his place...

He stared at the cross and considered Bonnie walking out of his life for good. Another man's hands on her lush body.
 

Shit.
Now all he wanted to do was punch someone.

Chapter Two

The exclusive dungeon on the third level was reserved for strictly vetted members who could not only afford the exorbitant membership fees to belong, but understood the expectations that came with being in such a private club. Because many of the Purgatory staff worked together like an extended family, many employees were quietly offered a complimentary membership as a job perk. Bonnie's privileges had been extended through Jim, which Gabe, the general manager, had encouraged her to keep after her Dom's passing. A benefit she'd not taken advantage of for a long time.

The circular stairs leading up to the dungeon reminded her how different she found Purgatory from what she expected. The club downstairs catered to typical expectations with a dark atmosphere complete with concrete walls, old wood everywhere you looked and the space often bathed in red light. Up here, the world became elegant and sophisticated.

She turned the knob and stepped into something more like an old world ballroom instead of a dungeon. With thick vintage draperies covering the walls and opulent chandeliers softly lighting the space, it felt a little like stepping back in time when men were men and women were...well, something else. If not for the handcrafted bulky play equipment dotting the sides of the room, she'd think she'd snuck into an elegant club not meant for the likes of her.

Under normal circumstances, she couldn't imagine someone from the west side of town ever invited into a place like this. Despite decades of progress, there was still a lot of separation between those with lots of money and those without. This kind of pure decadence floored her. The owners of Purgatory had spared no expense to make their affluent members feel right at home. There were attendants available to cater to any desire a member wished to fulfill. Women volunteered in droves to be a house submissive, designated by the white flower clipped into their hair. The male submissives wore a white bow tie to signify the same.

The thought had crossed her mind on more than one occasion to volunteer. She'd even approached Gabe about the possibility. He'd gently steered her away from that position and suggested she first get to know someone before getting involved in her first new scene. Bonnie admired that his instincts about her were spot on. She needed to feel a certain level of trust before she let someone touch her. Some of that stemmed from a far from ideal childhood with two parents who had extreme difficulty showing affection to each other, let alone anyone else.

Which is why doing this once a month thing with Dex kind of worked for her. Bonnie shook away the immediate thought that she was kidding herself. The man should have been perfect for this situation. She knew him well, he clearly had no desire for a relationship and he didn't seem to mind that she didn't have the perfect size six body.

Except for one thing. She had no idea how long Dex had been a member here, but they'd met the first night Jim brought her to Purgatory. That night remained fixed in her memory forever. Her Dom had not only brought her to this place so they could scene in public. He'd wanted to watch her scene with others. Dex in particular.

So when Cass had suggested she go to him for help, she feared crossing over a line she'd drawn a long time ago. The man had made her body sing from night one and she'd felt guilty for it ever since. It was shameful to admit that a man not her Dom had done more for her libido than any other.

The luxurious space was filling up with familiar faces. She smiled to some as she passed different stations, and averted her eyes to the floor for others on her way to the back corner. For her sake, Dex always chose the cross partially shrouded from the rest of the group by two walls and a couple of strategically placed plants. Others were still welcomed to observe any of these spaces, but there was something about that corner that made people realize that scene was more private than others.
 

A variety of themed rooms were also available at the back of the space for those who wanted to take their scenes even further—and without the possibility of anyone watching. Everyone's comfort level when it came to their play differed, and Purgatory was more than willing to accommodate them all.

She passed one sub kneeling on the floor with a bright pink ball gag lodged in her mouth. Immediately she recognized her friend Cass and smiled. She had actually met her Dom here at Purgatory a while back and things were going really well between her and her Sir. Tomorrow they'd probably share lunch and compare marks. Funny how much had changed. These days, Bonnie loved to play pretty hard and delighted in any lingering marks or soreness that kept the scene alive for as long as possible.

She turned the corner and barely stopped herself before she collided into an unfamiliar back. Instinct had an apology already forming on her tongue when she caught sight of what was happening. What the hell? There was a woman already strapped to her cross and a large crowd had formed to watch. She searched the people in front of her and saw no sign of Dex. Her sigh of relief that he wasn't about to scene with someone else didn't escape her. Her stomach had immediately knotted at the idea she'd been replaced for the night.

Bonnie took a few deep breaths and tried to still her racing heart.

"Hello, my Bonnie sub."

She jumped at the sound of his voice mere inches from her ear. Although she'd recognize that deep, sexy tone anywhere, it still shocked her when he directed it toward her.

"Surprised?"

She didn't know what she was anymore. Surprised? Confused? Crazy? Take your pick she wanted to say. "Yes." She stuck with the one simple word that didn't show just how tongue-tied she felt.

"You and I are going to do something different tonight," Dex said.

"Different?" Her stomach plummeted to her feet. She didn't want different. She wanted Dex's whip on her back, his body pressing into hers as she flew apart in his arms. It's all she'd thought about for days.

"Bu—" The protest died on her lips when his fingers grabbed her right hip in a grip tight enough to bruise.

"Do you trust me to give you what you need?" he asked. His tone wasn't friendly but annoyed.
 

She nodded, too nervous to speak. He'd moved closer and the heat coming from his body surrounded her back. Another step and he'd be pressing into her. Her heartbeat went crazy and her head fogged up, making it difficult to remember why she wanted to protest.