Hold the Roses (27 page)

So was Morey, who was the easiest guy to get along with. He was
always happy. In all the years I knew him, I never heard him say a bad word
about anybody. Richard Deacon was like an older brother to me. I could
talk to him about anything. Larry Mathews, who played Richie, was adorable. His mother was always on the set and we got along fine. Larry's birthday is August 15...same as mine!

Mary and I never became very close. I don't know why. We liked each
other, worked well together, but never really got close or became what you
might call "bosom buddies." Mary used to say, "I'm going to have my own production company called MTM, and I'm going to use a lil pussycat as a
logo like the MGM lion." She was very ambitious about her career and
knew what she wanted. She got her comedic timing from all of us. She
learned fast. But I always felt badly that we didn't become better friends. I
really think I was jealous! She was younger than I was; she was prettier; and
she had a better figure, so I was jealous.... Do you blame me?

All the guys had a crush on her, including Dick, which he admits to.
Carl's son, Rob, once went over and patted Mary on the butt. Mary laughed
about it and told Carl, and it wound up becoming a big joke. But no one
ever patted me on the butt! Maybe I was getting upset because they seemed
to be paying more attention to her and worrying about her all the time.
Me? I think they took me for granted, knowing I was the "old school," so
to speak. Mary was very much the novice. Whenever Sheldon would give
notes, he'd tell Mary about a line and tell her to do this and that. He'd do
the same to Dick. He would even tell Morey about a move on a line, but he
NEVER said a word to me.

I finally went up to him and said, "Have you got any notes for me?"

"You don't need any," he told me. "You know what to do." I really
sorta felt left out. I know it was a very big compliment, but I felt stupid. I
should have been pleased he felt like that, but at the time, I felt awful.

Mary had a lot of problems, which I didn't realize at the time. Her
sister died of an overdose, she was getting a divorce from her first husband,
she had a son to bring up, and she was going out with Grant Tinker, who
lived in New York. He was with the advertising agency that had our show.
Mary started doing commercials for Kent cigarettes with Dick. Morey and
I never did any commericals. Little by little, Mary was becoming very well
known and getting closer to her goal of becoming a major star and having
her MTM production company.

I'm so sorry we never became close. I sometimes feel we missed some
good times through the years, but I'm happy to say we are good friends
today. We see each other when we can. She lives in New York, and I live in
California. When she comes to California, we do try to see each other.

As I said, Sheldon Leonard, Carl Reiner, Dick Van Dyke, and Danny
Thomas owned the show. The company was named CALVADA. CA for
Carl, L for Leonard, VA for Van Dyke and DA for Danny Thomas.

We would rehearse from 1:00 to 5:00 P.M. on tape day, then get made
up. Our hair was done earlier, about 11:30 or noon. We'd go to dinner (on
the lot) from 5:15 to 6:45, then come back to the stage, have our makeup touched up, get dressed, and then our hair would be combed out last. At
7:00 P.M. the audience came in, and Carl would introduce each of us. The
three cameras would come out, and we would start the first scene. After
the scene was over, Morey and I would talk to the audience and keep them
"up" with jokes and kidding around. Carl told stories and was very funny.

Morey was known as the "human joke machine." He would tell the
audience, "Give me a subject." Someone would yell "tree" or "umbrella,"
and he would do a joke on that subject or whatever they called out. After
about ten or fifteen minutes, we'd be ready for the second scene. We would
do this audience participation between scenes. That is, if the cameras needed
reloading or we had a change of clothes, somebody was always out in the
audience keeping them up and ready for the rest of the show. We would tape
from 7:30 till 9:30 P.M. We did it one time, not three or four like they do it
today. We did it once, and that was it! And they all turned out to be classics.

Sometimes the whole gang of us would go out for a bite to eat. We'd
go to Trader Vic's or some other nice restaurant. We'd talk about the show
we just filmed and rehash everything about the show. What laughs, what
fun. It was a wonderful way to end the night.

Sheldon directed the first three or four shows. Then, John Rich came
in. It was like old home week for me! John directed for a year, I think,
maybe two. All I know is he is the best comedy director I have ever worked
with. He knew what all of us were thinking. We would come in on Wednesday, read next week's script through, and make comments. Sheldon and
Carl would be there.. .and then all of a sudden, Sheldon would be gone.
He would make his comments and leave. We nicknamed him "The
Shadow." We gave him a floor mat with the name Lamont CranstonThe Shadow. We would then read this week's script, which we had commented on the week before. We were always a week ahead. After reading
the scripts, we would get up on our feet and feel our way around the scene.
John would then say, "Move over here on that line. Make it a two shot on
that line," etc., then we'd do the scene again and go on to the next scene.

One time we were doing a scene in the office. There were five of us in
the scene. I got stuck on a move, and I didn't know if I should sit down or
walk on the line or what. I looked at John, and he looked at me, shook his
head with his hand, said, "Wait." When we were finished with the scene,
he walked over to me and said, "I know you were stuck. I think you should
walk on that line." I was floored. Five people in the scene, and he knew I
was stuck.

John taught me so much. He'd show me camera angles, what lens
they were using, and during our lunch breaks he would bring me into the
editing room and make me edit a scene or two on the Movieola. A Movieola
is three machines with each machine a camera filming the same scene. You
cut from one, two, or three into the final edit. Believe me, I learned a lot,
and I'm grateful to John and always will be for what he taught me. Most of
all, I treasure his friendship.

Carl was brilliant when it came to changing a scene.. .or writing something to fill in. When he decided I should do the Aunt Agnes lines, he
would come up with the damnedest lines and throw them around like
bullets. Even Morey would come up with lines. Our wonderful script girl,
Marge Mullen, was a gem. She would write down all the Aunt Agnes lines
and, finally, when Carl decided which one we would use, she'd put the
others in the back of her book and label it "SOS"-meaning "Some Other
Show."

When we did the Twizzle episode, the first scene wasn't working right.
Our routine, on tape day was: We'd do the whole show with all the cameras, in case we made any changes. Then, as I told you, dinner, makeup,
hair, audience. This time we were all trying to make the first scene work.
When we finished with cameras, Carl said, "We'll go at it in the commissary. We'll see if we can fix this thing." So we all went in and sat at one table
and started from the top.

Morey said, "Why don't I say..."

Carl said, "Great. Then Roe will say this and Deac will say...."

And Deac said, "How about if I say..."

"Great," said Carl and we went through the whole scene like that.

When we finished we yelled and screamed, "That's it! That's it!" Carl
said, "Did anybody write it down?" We all looked at one another... nobody
had written it down. Marge Mullen yelled from another table, "I got it on
a napkin. I'll type it up and have it in your dressing rooms before the
show." What a gem. A great gal to boot! The whole cast and crew were like
that. It was a loving, hard-working company... at least for me. I couldn't
wait to go to work every day.

We started shooting the first show on June 19, my wedding anniversary. The pilot had us doing comedy bits and me doing my Durante routine. Morey did his cello bit and Dick did his drunken uncle bit with me.
It was a great show, and it was sold that night for thirteen weeks to CBS.
Our sponsor was Proctor and Gamble.

We did the thirteen shows.. .then we were canceled. We were up against
Perry Como, who went on at 9:00 P.M. for an hour. We were on at 9:30 P.M.
on another network. Nobody gave up Perry for us. Sheldon went back to
New York and talked to the sponsors and said, "I know this show will
make it. It's too good to go off." In those days, the sponsors had their say,
not like today where the networks control everything. He kept saying,
"There's so much talent in this show, you gotta go with it. Keep it on
during the summer. I know it will catch on." They finally agreed because
they had faith in Sheldon... and we stayed on for five years. The rest is
history.

Each summer Dick would do a movie. He did Bye Bye Birdie the first
year and told us when we came back to work, "If you're a friend of mine,
don't go to see the picture." The second year he did Mary Poppins. I don't
have to tell you what a classic and wonderful film that is. Then one year he
did Lt. Robin Caruso, U.S.N. which he didn't like.

All of us kept busy during the summer. Mary and Grant were happily
married by this time. I think they spent their summers just enjoying being
together. Morey did his act all over the country. I played Reno, Vegas, and
Tahoe and did The Tonight Show many times. Dick was always doing a
picture.

As for me, it was the happiest and saddest time of my life!-1961 to
1966!

M~ Deat. Z[kiuds My A gels

Things were going along pretty well. Bobby was playing a lot of golf, so our
pediatrician, Kermit Ryan, suggested that I get Bobby a membership at
Lakeside Golf Club, the golf club that Bing Crosby and Bob Hope started.
We had to wait until another party sold its membership. I think it went for
$2,000 at that time. I think it's worth about $250,000 now! I gave Bobby
the membership for his birthday and they gave him an application, which
had to be signed by two members. Dr. Ryan signed it, and when Bobby
went to work on the Crosby show, he asked Bing to sign it. Bing said,
"Proud to do it, of Rob. So the girl bought you a membership for your
birthday. We have to play a few rounds sometime."

Bobby handed in the application, and we didn't hear anything for
about two months. I said, "Something is wrong. Call the club and ask
them." So he did and they said they had never gotten Bing's signature, so
they were trying to get ahold of him and ask him. When they finally reached
him he said, "Yes, I signed it.... That's for Bobby Guy, right?" So they let
him in the club.

Bobby played golf with Gordon MacRae, James Garner, and George
Gobel. Bobby and Gobel became such good friends, they were like two
teenagers, calling one another on the phone and talking for hours. It was a
wonderful friendship. Bobby called him "Little Bit" and Gobel would say,
"Gobel and Guy, that's the cry." When Bobby made his hole in one, it was
like New Year's Eve. We threw a party at the club. Gobel always said, "I've
never trusted a guy who didn't drink, but I would trust you with my life."
They were such good buddies.

It was the same with Gordon MacRae. When our daughter had to
start school, Gordie told us about Egremont Private School. His kids were
there, and he said it was great because they pick up the kids in the morning
and drop them off after school at the house. They never drop them off
unless the mother, father or another relative is there. We both thought that
was great because my hours at work were different all the time and Bobby's
were different too. But "Grammy," Bobby's mother, was there all the time,
so that worked out fine. Noop stayed there until the 6th grade and then
she attended Robert Fulton Middle School and, after that, Van Nuys High
School. Thanks to Gordie, Egremont School really gave her the best start
in Noop's education.